SIL lives in dreamland...

EuroChick

I was on the phone with SIL this morning. ?She is due on July 8th and she was asking me about what she needs for the baby, yadayadayadayadayada. ?Anyway we were discussing summer plans and she brought up the following:

1.) Taking her future DD swimming in the summer at the pool in her parents condo. ?I wasn't allowed to swim for the first 6 weeks post-partum and I was told not to take DD swimming until her first shots at 8 weeks.?

2.) Taking future DD to a wedding 5 hours away in the end of August and bringing DD to the cocktail hour which begins at 8pm. ?I tried to explain the whole witching hour thing and that it probably wouldn't be so handy bring a baby to a loud evening wedding, but she just didn't get it.

3.) Discussing clothing needs I said that for the first 6 weeks DD pretty much wore onesie and a pajama all the time. ?But she was planning on buy her DD some dresses and worry about the heat when taking her to the beach. Who bring a month old to the beach?

Okay I am sure once the baby arrives she will realize that a newborn although amazing is a bit more limiting in terms of activities especially during the first few weeks. ?I just hope she isn't in too much shock.

pinksweetpea2

Meh, I took Lily to a beach party when she was 6 weeks old. ?I had her well covered, put some sunscreen on the skin that was exposed, and we stayed in the shade. ?She was fine- in fact she seemed very much to enjoy the sounds of the surf and the fresh air.

I guess I don't see the big deal about any of this stuff. ?I had two newborns at my wedding, and if I had not torn so bad, my MW wouldn't have cared if I went swimming before 6 weeks PP. ?As for the clothing- while I preferred onsies, I know plenty of nesties who constantly dressed their newborns up when they left the house.

She will have to figure these things out for herself. ?

KGsky

Just sit back and enjoy the show.  My SIL was 3 months behind me, and did not want to hear any of my advice.  So I just let her figure it out on her own.  I tried not to laugh--too hard--when all her "theories and plans" went bust.

BetchySprout

I think your SIL and mine live in the same dreamworld (though yours is pretty silly!). I am trying SO hard not to be judgemental about it, but mine is doing the following (Due mid-August).

1) They just bought a house in the middle of nowhere, 30 min. commute for each of them. (Not the bad part...they used to live 5 min. from her work, 55  from his)

2) They don't plan on putting the baby in daycare. Dad works second shift, goes to work at 3-11, mom works 8 until 5. Baby will be home with dad until 2:30, mom will come and work from home (yes, they will pay her while she watches her kid). This means they will never, ever get a break. Neither will get any sleep at all. I have a severely easy baby, and this schedule would wear on me like nothing else...I can't imagine what it is going to do to them.

3) All I see when I see their new house is "housework". It is a nice house though.

 

(I am sorry for hijacking your thread, I just had to get that out!)

 

Muffin0

I took DD to an evening wedding when she was a month old. It was a family friend, and her mom is my kids pedi. DD slept through the entire thing, loud music and all. They all (all the pedis that are from the office) just said that babies have a way of tuning out stuff to fall asleep.?

She can't put sunscreen on her baby until 6 months, so I hope she won't take the baby to the beach. I'd assume it'd be considered child abuse. Same with swimming. No sunblock = no serious amount of time outside. ?

?

nictel

Let her figure it out on her own...  My SIL has two kids, 6 and 3, and is constantly telling me all the things that I should be doing.  She thinks that because she has children she is the expert of the world...I am really starting to avoid her.

EuroChick

LOL for the wedding I totally get that people have brought babies to wedding BUT this is a black tie 350 person affair that starts at 8pm and is 5 hours away from where they live. ?I am sure it could be done BUT who on earth would want to 6 weeks post partum...

As for the rest I think the big problem is that SIL has the image of doing what she does every summer (she lives on the French riviera) and just doesn't really the amount of work taking care of a baby is. ?I really you don't really until you have one BUT I think she is more deluded than most.

At least you now want to give breast feeding a shot so that makes me smile.?

EuroChick

I should mention that I am not hounding SIL with advice she calls me a lot to chat and had a few questions related to the thing above so I told her the truth from my perspective.

BetchySprout

nictel:

Let her figure it out on her own...  My SIL has two kids, 6 and 3, and is constantly telling me all the things that I should be doing.  She thinks that because she has children she is the expert of the world...I am really starting to avoid her.

 

This is exactly why I am not saying a thing to my SIL. I don't want to be overbearing.