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TTC After a Loss
My "getting to know you" post
I'm pretty new to this board, and I tend to respond to posts more than start a post. But I enjoy coming to this board and getting and giving support, so here is a little more background on me!
My name is Suzanne and I live in Lexington, KY where my husband is finishing up school at the University of Kentucky. I finished a Master's in International Studies this past December at UK and I am currently looking for a job. We are going to relocate to Louisville, KY this summer (my hometown!).
My husband and I were actually set up by mutual friend- a coworker of mine knew my husband and thought it would be a good match- and it was! My husband is Arab and I studied Arabic in school, so even though we are an intercultural couple, we really have great understanding of each other's backgrounds. Plus, I love that international travel is a requirement in our relationship! We got married in June 2006.
We decided to TTC this fall after talking about it for months. In his culture people think couples should begin TTC the day after the wedding! And my mom has been whining about wanting a grandchild for years! But about a year ago is when I began to get that twinge- cooing at every baby I saw and dreaming of what our kids would look like! I stopped taking BC in September because I had my gall bladder removed and the BC could have been a reason for its inflammation. So, we thought it was a sign to begin to TTC. We began in November. When I didn't get pg the first month I began to worry about having ptoblems TTC. But when I got a BFP in December I was thrilled!
I was around 6 wks pg when I began to MC. At first I thought it was just spotting, but when I began to pass clots I knew it was a MC. That was a Friday evening and the doctor on call said that there was really no reason to go to the ER since there is nothing anyone can do to stop a MC that early. Monday morning I went to see the doctor. They saw a sac but nothing in it. They told me to wait another week and then come back. They said it might be too early to see anything yet. But I knew it was over. By that Wednesday I began bleeding again. The doctor confirmed the MC later that week. I decided to naturally MC, but I wish someone had told me how bad the cramping could get. Thankfully DH was very supportive throughout it all.
Since it was my first pregnancy and I was not that far along, we have no way of knowing what went wrong. Of course, numerous people have told me how common this is and that the odds are I will go on to have successful pregnancies, but I will remain worried until I have a healthy baby to hold. Thankfully, we really did not tell anyone I was pg so I didn't have to go back and tell everyone about the MC. But because I am close to my family I felt like I needed to tell my parents. The day that I had hoped to announce I was pregnant was the day that I had to tell them about the MC. It sucked. But their support has been great.
I lurked on this board after my MC until I got my first AF because I felt frozen in time, figuratively, until my body went back to normal. But reading your stories and even seeing the recent BFPs has been a comfort. I'm glad to get to know you guys better and I hope this post lets you know me a little more!
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Re: My "getting to know you" post
BFP #2 = 3/30/09 DD born 12/9/09
BFP #3 = 5/17/11 EDD = 1/27/12
18 months
Half of my DH's family is Middle Eastern so I hear you on the expectation to TTC right away. His family is constantly asking why I'm not pg yet and most of them even know about my loss. It's so hard to have to deal with that.
Thanks for sharing your story and I'm very sorry for your loss. ((HUGS))