baby bully — The Bump
Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months

baby bully

Oy Vey. We were informed by the nursery worker at church tonight that our DS was being aggressive and hitting another child. He has never hit other kids before. Anyone have any suggestions of what to do to get a 19 mo old not to hit? He can only understand so much, know what I mean? Anyone else have this problem?

Re: baby bully

  • Check out the books The Baby Whisperer for Toddlers and Happiest Toddler on the block. They're great at arming you with tools for these situations. Agressive behavior according to TBW should be stopped/restrained immediately and he should be removed from the area. You say no, you may not hit. It hurts. and then remove him for a minute or two.   They also understand more than you think they do. DD was pulling hair and we successfully taught her that is not okay at 13mos.
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  • I would also ask them to pay attention to see if they can find out what happens right before he hits, and how he reacts to the child's reaction.  My DD has always been sweet and easy going but will not hesitate to hit someone who is walking- toddling quickly and haphazardly near her.  I think she is afraid to get trampled, since she can't walk yet.  You can more efficiently and effectively address a behavior if you know the cause and "reward-" or what he gets out of it.  In my daughter's case, although I was shocked to see it and tempted to "scold", once I realized why she did it, I could intervene, by standing b/t them, or helping her stand by holding her up.  While your kid may be bullying, it is possible that the other kid is instigating by patting his head, or crying, or doing something sneaky.  It's not a big deal and most kids do it at some time, but you can observe DC in another env't to look for clues or ask them to watch for possible antecedents.  If you try to view behavior as a form of communication, you may find that your child is "telling" you that he is uncomfortable.  GOod luck!
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