OB appointment yesterday - sort of a vent

Ruby_Tuesday

This is basically a random vent about my appointment.

I was there for 2 hours for about 10 minutes of time with the OB.  I hate that.  Apparently my hcg levels were back to zero only 4 days after I started bleeding, which made the OB say that I wouldn't have even known I was pregnant if the home tests weren't so sensitive these days.  This kind of annoyed me because I was a week late, had 3 + HPT, and when AF came she lasted for 8 days.  I would have noticed even with out the HPT. 

I brought up RCL testing and the OB discouraged the idea because my second loss was so early.  I can kind of see his point.

But then he told me to wait 3 months to TTC again.  I know this is just what they say, but it really really annoyed me.  In one breath he basically tells me that I barely had a loss and then in the next he tells me to wait 3 months.  Make up your freaking mind.  I replied, "There is no way I'm waiting 3 months." and he looked very surprised that I said that.  But then I burst into tears so that was the end of that discussion.  He proceeded to quote this study and that study.  I barely listened and just got the heck out of there. 

I'm kind of not sure what to do.  I don't think he's a bad doctor.  I think I'm just very sensitive.  I don't have any better recs in the area.  I do have a rec for a RE specialist, but I don't think I'm at that point yet. 

Oh, and I'm tired of sitting in the OB's waiting room with a bunch of pregnant ladies waiting to discuss how I miscarried.

ibis

Was the 3 mo for emotional reasons? I know that's usually why they give you that number, and if my doc tells me that I will totally disregard. I don't think anyone can dictact to you when you will be emotionally ready to TTC again.

Waiting in the OB's waiting room is hell... when I went in to confirm I heard two pg girls complaining about how often they had to pee, and I wanted to knock them out.

*hugs* Ruby.?

mrsmiller06

Ugh, I'd have to agree that the worst part of going there is spending the 2hrs in the waiting room with all of the pg ladies. It is like some new form of torture if you ask me!! Especially when you are stuck in there with a bunch of pg teens!! GRRR

I really don't see why you'd have to wait 3mos. I think that it might just be what he uses as his standard answer to a mc. I think you will know when your body is ready and that is when you should ttc again. Sorry to hear that your dr seems to have a really crappy bed side manner!!!

Hope today is better for you.

gallerygirl

I think that 3 months is crap. You tell him I said so.

I'm so sorry. I HATE that people say that about the HPT. My first loss was early, but I definitely would have known since I was over a week late.  It sounds like he is not very sensitive to your loss and the emotional toll this can take on a person. 

Also- With my early loss, my midwife said to go ahead and try, without waiting for AF. So opinions can be different even in the medical field.

:::hugs:::

lelia

My regular GP told me it would be fiine for me to ttc asap with this last m/c because it was "so early, that many women don?t even know it" whatever. So you can ttc if you like.

I totally get the not wanting to wait in the waiting room with the pg ladies....I got sent to a pg ladies clinic day right before I miscarried and I was in hell. The worst part for me was the teenager who was sitting there with her mother. Ummm, if you have to come with your mom, maybe you shouldn?t be KU? I know that?s harsh, but it?s how I felt sitting there knowing that I was going to miscarry.

VanessaRae9608

sorry about your day I also had to have blood work drawn at the office for 3 weeks post m/c and I hated sitting there with all the PG ladies - that is so hard. I agree that the waiting period shoudl not be 3 months - before we started meeting with the fertility nurse specialist the ob said we only had to wait 1 month since i had the methotrexate shot.

Hope you feel better soon. ((HUGS)) 

Bride2b2004

Ruby_Tuesday:

But then he told me to wait 3 months to TTC again.  I know this is just what they say, but it really really annoyed me.  In one breath he basically tells me that I barely had a loss and then in the next he tells me to wait 3 months.  Make up your freaking mind.  I replied, "There is no way I'm waiting 3 months." and he looked very surprised that I said that.  But then I burst into tears so that was the end of that discussion.  He proceeded to quote this study and that study.  I barely listened and just got the heck out of there. 

I'm kind of not sure what to do.  I don't think he's a bad doctor.  I think I'm just very sensitive.  I don't have any better recs in the area.  I do have a rec for a RE specialist, but I don't think I'm at that point yet. 

Oh, and I'm tired of sitting in the OB's waiting room with a bunch of pregnant ladies waiting to discuss how I miscarried.

The 3mo wait in your situation seems ridiculous.  I don't think he is a bad doctor, but he doesn't sound like the right one for you.  I was happy with my OB's office during my whole first pregnacy (which was perfect) but couldn't stand them when I had my loss... just not right for my circumstances.  If I were you, I would take that RE rec and run.  There is so much more attention and information.  You actually get to LOOK at the u/s as it is being done AND ask questions without a fierce rebuke.  You don't see a ton of pg ladies and if you do see any, you know they worked hard to get there...

That's just my 2 cents.  Sorry you had to go through this.  Good luck!