IF Testing and Treatment w/o 10/11

acleverusername

This is a place for those of us who have already started TTC, but have started infertility testing and/or treatments. You can express your thoughts, feelings, and frustrations on infertility. TTC can be a long journey naturally, then add in the difficulties associated with infertility, and it becomes a whole new ball game. The road to infertility can be lonely, frustrating, and complicated, so let's make this a place where we can vent, ask questions, and support one another. Feel free to resurrect this thread at any point in the week if you have something to say. Treat this as an ongoing conversation.

Diagnosis (if you've been):  

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA):  

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?):  

How are things going?:  

Any questions?:  

GTKY: What's the most funny/weird thing that happened during your wedding or someone else's wedding that you like to talk about? 

acleverusername

Edited because I forgot to update the GTKY. 

inthewoods23

Diagnosis (if you've been): unexplained, low morph, investigating immune causes

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WTO

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): hopefully some blood work for all the immunology and genetic tests!, saline sono this Friday

How are things going?: I survived being solo for 2 weeks at work. Oye. I'm a little concerned about what's going on with the pre-authorization for my labs. I contacted my insurance last week and they said they had nothing on file! I'm having the medical assistant at the RI's office confirm she did, in fact, send that stuff off. So that's annoying, but otherwise things are good

Any questions?: tips for a good blood draw? I know drink lots of water, but is there anything else I can do to help keep the blood flowing? When I had the 4 vials drawn last week she said it was slowing down but perhaps it would have helped if I was squeezing a stress ball or something to keep it moving?

GTKY: What's the most funny/weird thing that happened during your wedding that you always talk about? 
Omg I'm so excited about this question! I have SO MANY funny moments to talk about. So many in fact I will spoiler each one ha. Enjoy!

Funny #1 was actually not known about until after the fact. We sat with each set of parents to watch our wedding video and when we were with my ILs my MIL had noticed a hilarious blunder during a still shot of a sandwich board placed in front of the main doors of the reception building (tells guests to go around to the veranda for the cocktail hour). These doors the sandwich board is in front of is mostly glass so you could see the guests walking up and around in the reflection and my MIL had caught my cousin's now husband tripping on the curb as he turned right as instructed by the board Such a unimportant detail but it was a great catch.

Funny #2 was the hula hooping competition we had in which my cousin (a guy) STILL beats my aunt. This was a call back to the Alaskan cruise we had done with some of my mom's side of the family (I think) the summer prior. They had one after some game event we went to and at the end it was my aunt and my cousin in the finals of the cruise hula hooping contest. The final challenge was who could hula hoop with the most hoops and my cousin ended up winning with 3 or 4 hoops at a time. His prize was being crowned King of the Ship and on another day of the cruise led everybody in the YMCA dance. SO at some point while we're planning our wedding it's decided my aunt wants revenge and without my cousin's knowledge my aunt practiced FOR MONTHS before our big day. Well she STILL ended up losing. In fact, she lost in a matter of seconds We did to a contest with all the guest and a cousin on my dad's side ended up winning. Also my aunt wanted to compete with my mom with Skip-Its (remember those?!) and they both sucked so bad, but it was great.

Funny #3 was my brother stealing the microphone after everyone had given their speeches and roasted some of the family. It was like 2 minutes but hysterical. Forever immortalized in our wedding video.

Funny #4 was the garter dance/toss. DH was adamant that he didn't want to shove his head under my dress and use his teeth and I said that's fine if he just wants to use his hands or whatever. I didn't want him to be uncomfortable. WELL. Let's start off with the dance - it's to NSYNC's Space Cowboy omg. My SIL slid one of the chairs as smooth as silk to him and he starts dancing/straddling it like he's some kind of stripper. I sit down and hold my leg up so he can grab the garter and he throws my dress over his head. Since I'm not expecting this AT ALL I am DYING of laughter. There's an amazing photo of me with my leg out, DH underneath my dress with my head parallel to the freaking floor because I'm laughing so hard. There's some great reactions of people in the background. I'm so glad DH ended up doing it because it might have been my favorite part about the day and I look fondly back on it.

acleverusername

Wow I am such a jerk! I made this GTKY totally inaccessible for our SMBCs. Argh. What a DB I am! Please forgive me @optimistgardener & @hanshotfirst77! I've corrected it, but please feel free to replace it with something else. 

walkawaynee

@inthewoods23 I apparently have only been to super lame and boring weddings compared to yours

Diagnosis (if you've been):  AMA, DOR and low morphology 

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA):  WTO

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?):  in limbo waiting for ivf prep next cycle.

How are things going?:  Trying to figure out if we are doing back to back retrievals or just one and then transfer (if we have anything to transfer). My clinic typically does just one retrieval and requires us to put down an additional non refundable deposit if we want to do 2 in a row. Otherwise if we wait until the results of the first retrieval and want/need another we are put to the end of the wait list and could have to wait 2-3 cycles to get back on the schedule. I don't know if this is normal but I find it frustrating. 

Any questions?:  natm

GTKY: What's the most funny/weird thing that happened during your wedding or someone else's wedding that you like to talk about? Funny/not funny but I was at a wedding where every single speech talked about how much the couple fights, it was awkward. Also they are now divorced. 

optimistgardener

@acleverusername no worries! i missed the original and promise even if i'd caught it I would have just rephrased it to suit my own purposes.

@inthewoods23 your wedding stories are so funny! it's great that you have so many to share.

Diagnosis (if you've been):  wrinkly old eggs and not many of them

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA):  technically WTO, practically still deep in the bench

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?):  tomorrow morning i get to go do some labwork! actually my fertility clinic doesn't seem to care about new bloodwork, but my primary care physician who i just saw for my annual loaded up my plate with all the usual stuff so what the hell, i'll give up some blood to find out just how much crappier my AMH and FSH have gotten this past year. also it's getting to be the time for purchasing drugs and sperm, so i've got sperm headed up to my clinic this coming week, and i need to dig out my credit card for some big purchases of stims galore.

How are things going?:  i'm so crazy busy with teaching i don't even know which direction i'm pointing half the time, so actual deep thoughts about ttc seem to be taking a back seat (although i apparently still have time to lurk this board really heavily. it's my "i need 5 minutes to not think about the Seven Years War, i think i'll just check what the internet has to offer" go-to these days.

Any questions?:  nada for the moment

GTKY: What's the most funny/weird thing that happened during your wedding or someone else's wedding that you like to talk about?

To start this story off, it is useful to know that I suck at tradition and have an allergy to a lot of gender-normy stuff, which weddings typically have in spades. Also I really really hate being the center of attention (except, for some reason, when I'm teaching. Then it's fine 🤷‍♀️). Anyhow, many years ago (15? 18?) I was home from college and got invited to my mom and her wife's friends' wedding. Nice folks that I still know. The wedding was pretty low-key, but someone convinced the bride to do the thing where she throws the bouquet over her shoulder for an unmarried woman to try to catch. So they round up all the unmarried women. I grumble a bit but go join the group. But then the actual bouquet tossing part gets delayed for some reason and there's this awkward waiting thing, which I take as my cue to try to sneak away. I sort of wander away about 20 feet or so (let's just call it deep right field) and try to look busy in a way that was much harder to do before the advent of smart phones. Finally they round up the bride and the bouquet and she turns around and hucks it mightily over her shoulder. It rockets way over the heads of the gathered unmarried women and I look up in time to realize it's coming right for me. I PANIC, like complete stage fright full on cannot control my body panic, and initially freeze. Then, just as the bouquet should land basically right in my arms, I leap dramatically about 3 feet backwards, and the thing lands, plop, exactly where I had been standing before. I turn beet red, come back to my senses, and step forward to pick the now muddied and broken bouquet up. Everyone in the crowd titters awkwardly. And that is all I remember of my most embarrassing moment at a wedding.

I sometimes still wonder whether this is, in fact, the reason i wound up a spinster with wrinkly eggs. But that's for a different therapy session!

Bonus wedding story on a similar theme. A good friend of mine got married to an Coptic Christian guy a few years back. She asked me to be one of the bridesmaids, which I was delighted to do so long as it involved taking her out drinking several times in advance, but then it turned out that the wedding was going to be a big deal. And when I say big deal, I mean Coptic Christian-style big deal. Before I understood how big of a deal this was, I had already negotiated my terms of participation in the wedding as follows: I wear pants and no makeup, but I follow the color theme and allow the army of hair dressers to try to tack my hair into some kind of order (sidenote, my mom had been diagnosed the previous week with stage 4 cancer and so I was not feeling very sprightly). The other bridesmaids, all of whom are good friends of mine, went all in on the dresses and makeup. Anyway, I wasn't completely clear what I was in for until I actually arrive at the church with the other bridesmaids, and we do the thing where we all walk down the aisle to stand in the front while latching arms with the groomsmen, who were all just ✨fancy✨ and smelled like a wall of expensive cologne. As I walked I could feel people looking at me, and puzzled murmurs all the way up the aisle. I turn around once i'm up there and: the guests, in their hundreds, were all in their finest designer dresses, 6-inch heels, fake eyelashes a mile long, sparkle galore, hair spray all day and all night, the works. The men are all in the snazziest suits you can imagine. And there I was in my "grad student buys pants that will hopefully work for the wedding and also maybe a future job interview" pants and a shirt in the appropriate color that had seemed sufficiently formal at the time, with not a dash of lipstick. And it turns out that unlike the weddings on a roughly protestant/catholic model that I have attended in the past, in Coptic weddings, the bridesmaids and the groomsmen stand up in front in a line for what feels like hours while the priest delivers an extended sermon and performs the ceremony with the bride and groom, which is waaaay more elaborate than in Protestant/Catholic land. And through this whole thing, every time I looked out at the crowd, it seemed like everyone's eyes were on me. I could hear ripples of giggling but also disapproving tut-tuts. Fortunately, I (think?) the bride was generous enough to find her one scrappy and bedraggled bridesmaid more amusing than a blot on the wedding. ETA that the bride's guests were comparatively few in number, and their fashion level was way more within my realm of comprehension.

So I guess the moral of the story is I am bad at weddings.

acleverusername

First of all, apologies for being a total lurker last week. I just didn't have the capacity to adequately support you all as I raced to get a ton of work done. Just wanted to do a quick round of things I saw last week: 

@keikilove first of all, I was so so sad to see your post in today's B*tchfest. 🐙
@bows22 I'm so excited that you had your first IUI! And well, hopefully the last. But I totally get the hopeful/realistic sentiment. 
@LJMoon6 Holy eff that clinic of yours. Get out! Get out while you can! I've had an IUI be cancelled because my lining was too thin (but it was 4.5mm so way thinner than yours). Then again, apparently there's some kind of new study (I saw a YouTube video on it) that says that lining thickness doesn't make/break a cycle. That said, this was looking at IVF data, but wouldn't it apply to IUIs too? 
@zwink1 check my link in spoiler re: day 5/day 6 question: 

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskEmbryologists/comments/pij4qn/only_got_day_6_blasts_help/

@optimistgardener how goes the decision about whether or not to stay with the Nov retrieval cycle or wait until insurance kicks in in January? I felt my heart plummet when I read that last week. It is _SUCH_ a difficult decision to make. But your sperm donor sounds sweet and I hope he will help make you beautiful embryos!  
@inthewoods23 ditto for when I read last week about your clinic not having sent anything to your insurance for pre-auth. Like WTF?! I hope you can get to the bottom of that ASAP so you can get the blood draw show on the road. In terms of tips for successful blood draw, doing some jumping jacks beforehand helps. Or any kind of brisk movement. Your wedding stories are really funny; I'm glad you liked my GTYK. I've been sitting on this question for a while now, and the reason for that will become clear soon. 
@walkawaynee besides the upfront deposit, is there a disadvantage to committing to 2 cycles now? If your first cycle goes exceptionally well, can you cancel cycle 2? Also your wedding story... yikes! That's so bizarre to talk about the couple fighting at their own wedding! 

Diagnosis (if you've been):  Official: Unexplained; Unofficial: AMA, Hashimoto's, wondering sperm

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA):  WTO

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): IVF retrieval #2 (mid-luteal phase start) while also fertilizing eggs previously retrieved

How are things going?: Things are pretty good. I am one year older than the last time I posted here. My bday was last Monday. I made MH take me away for the weekend as my bday present as I found getting away and relaxing just before an egg retrieval does the soul good. So, we went up the coast, not too far, and explored a national reserve, and ate delicious oysters (my favorite thing EVAR!) We got back at noon today, and now I'm just waiting for Sergio to show his/her face so we can get this show on the road! Woo! 

I also FINALLY got confirmation today that my eggs are en route from Canada and should be arriving at my clinic here in SF tomorrow. OMG, this has been such a stressful situation. The company I picked, while they do these hand-carry arrangements, can really learn a thing or two about keeping their clients appraised of what's happening. I sent off all my paperwork to them on Sep 2, and I literally had to harass them every 2 weeks to figure out what's happening. Like, I'd email them (and there were 4-5 people CC'ed on our email chain) and then I would get no response or I'd get "last time we reached out to the clinics, neither were ready. We'll follow up again and let you know tomorrow." Then... radio silence. So I'd let a week go by and send another email. And then another week. Finally I lost it on them and was like "THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE." Which resulted in a phone call/email 30 min later. TL;DR. Of course regulations around transporting human oocytes have changed during the pandemic and no one in the government wants to take responsibility for saying what they should/shouldn't do. Oh, and it's Canadian gov't on top of that. Gah! I'm just waiting for that phone call/email tomorrow to confirm that my eggs have arrived. 

Any questions?:  NATM

GTKY: What's the most funny/weird thing that happened during your wedding or someone else's wedding that you like to talk about? 
Okay, so the reason this came to mind was because during my first egg retrieval in July, I started taking a laxative about half way through to help prevent blockage and that had me reading into our medicine cabinet because I had some. But then when I pulled out the bottle, I was reminded that it was our "wedding laxative" (as MH termed it when I showed him. Spoilering the rest because it'll be long. 

So, we got married in Canada even though we were already living in SF then. We flew in 8 days ahead so that I could have my east coast bachelorette party. And right after, I got a violet stomach bug. This was 6 days ahead of the wedding. Like... I shit you not (pun intended) it was horrid. At first I thought it was food poisoning, but after 48 hours, I knew something else was up. But MH didn't get sick. And even though we were getting married in the city where my parents live, we chose not to stay with them because that would have been too much stress. So we were staying in this tiny air bnb and I was paranoid that MH would get the flu too, and closer to the wedding. So, after each bout of diarrhea, I would douse the toilet with bleach and wipe everything down. Bleach was the only cleaning agent at the air bnb. But he ended up being OK. Anyways, in the first few days, when I couldn't get to a toilet fast enough, I ended up overdoing it on the Imodium, so by the time the wedding festivities were starting to roll around, I developed the opposite problem. The night before the wedding I literally got like 0 hours of sleep because I was running to the bathroom trying to squeeze one out and I just couldn't. But it was like... right there... in the rectum, but it wouldn't come out?! So, on the morning of the wedding, I had to send my bridegroom to the pharmacy as soon as it opened to get vaseline and gloves so that I could dis-impact myself (as instructed by a nurse-friend whom I was frantically consulting on my situation). And he picked up the laxative just in case. It was so gross. Lol. After I successfully dis-impacted myself, I opened the window to the bathroom to air it out, but I also exited the bathroom at roughly the same time, and MH was walking by so he was momentarily assaulted by the smell of what had just happened. But yes... he still married me. 

hanshotfirst77

Sorry I was MIA last week. 

@inthewoods23 I hope you get all that insurance stuff sorted out. What a hassle. 

@acleverusername ditto to what @optimistgardener said. No worries 😊 also I’m happy you had such a great birthday. Fx you can transport your eggs. Why does everything have to be so complicated!?

@walkawaynee that does sound super frustrating. I’m not sure how my clinic would do it but it’s never been an option for me anyways cause of insurance. Blah. 

Diagnosis (if you've been):  unexplained secondary IF , RPL, PCOS 

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA):  waiting for testing

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?):  hopefully will do saline Sono after cd1

How are things going?:  pretty good just waiting to get the testing going. And hopefully will be able to schedule around a vacation I’m planning for next month. 

Any questions?:  nope

GTKY: What's the most funny/weird thing that happened during your wedding or someone else's wedding that you like to talk about? 

It’s not really funny I just like talking about it lol. But I was actually married before and most people that know me know I’m not really a girly girl or traditional at all. I walked down the aisle to The Clash London calling. And we walked into the reception to Star Wars imperial
march. We had light sabers to walk under. And out cake toppers we’re actually two Halo action figures. It was very me. And though I certainly have less than wonderful feelings towards my ex husband now. I still think about that day and smile. I totally got married my own way. People still mention the music to me although probably less so now that we’re divorced but that’s probably just cause they feel awkward bringing it up. 

optimistgardener

@inthewoods23 argh i totally meant to answer your question about blood draws last night and instead just wrote some novels about weddings. I have all kinds of trouble with blood draws and have learned a few tricks over the years. what @acleverusername said about jumping jacks is true. Also keep your arm/hand warm. gloves and a warm sweater or whatever if need be till the last minute when you need to bare your vein. a squeezy ball or whatever is great, but also just opening and closing your hand a lot as they prep the vein and until they put the needle in. and you already know this, but lots of fluids! if the blood starts to slow down mid-draw, i think some nurses/phlebotomists will want you to gently move your hand to get things started again, but follow their preference. I'm gonna go get my blood drawn this morning. solidarity!

inthewoods23

@walkawaynee knowing how my clinic operated, having to wait 2-3 cycles to get started again on IVF sounds like what they would do. It sucks, but some clinics just are very structured in how they do things.

@optimistgardener I'm so surprised the bride didn't give you a heads up or anything with her wedding! So awkward feeling out of place like that. GL with your blood work!

@acleverusername I'm trying to be patient waiting for a response. It sounds like the clinic has gotten a ton of new patients in the last few months and have had a few staff out so sometimes it takes a while to get an answer. I would call and ask but I've already sent an email and decided I'll just wait for that. Might try my insurance again to see what happens when I ask someone else. I've been contacting my insurance via their live chat because I can't sit on the phone for over a half hour just waiting to speak to someone. Maybe that's not helping either. Idk *shrug*. Omg thank god your eggs are finally on the move! That took forever. Just me like getting my damn blood work done. Ugh. Your wedding story is great you know you're right for each other when you can handle the weird shit (literally) haha.

@hanshotfirst77 hope your saline sono gives you the all clear! I love that your wedding was so personalized. Weddings are kind of boring when there's nothing couple specific. We had quite a few personal touches with the music, the cake topper, etc. Meanwhile my cousin's was so much like a Pinterest wedding it looked like it could have been for anyone. But whatever, as long as the couples like what they put together then that's what matters. More fun as a guest to see personal touches though.

optimistgardener

@inthewoods23 i think the bride, left to her own devices, would have had some kind of cute little hippie wedding with homemade decor. the big-dealness of it all was something she caved on to meet the groom's family's expectations. So having a weirdo in her bridesmaid lineup was (i hope) something that she was like, "whatevs, these are my weirdo friends i care about and the in-laws can deal." if i hadn't been so caught up in my family's medical stuff i probably would have upped my style game a few notches, but i suspect no matter how many notches i upped it, i would never have achieved the look required of me for the setting.

kiki047

@inthewoods23 your wedding sounds like it was a blast! So annoying about the continuing pre-auth drama, I hope you're able to get that all sorted out soon. I am also curious about the blood draw tips because all I do is try to be super hydrated and have something on hand to eat/drink after in case I feel faint. I like to chew gum or crunch on a mint while they're doing it too. Clever's comments about literally getting your blood pumping makes sense to me. 
@walkawaynee ha, that sounds like what happened at MH's wedding with his first wife. His mom cried and begged him not to go through with it and he was barely speaking to her all night, and then his brother played a game of "what foods won't [ex-W] eat?" because she was the world's pickiest eater, and nobody really had anything nice to say. Aawwwkwardd... Also that's super annoying about your clinic's policy on back to back retrievals. My old clinic was like that. The new one makes it sound like we can roll right into another cycle but I don't actually know how that'll work yet. 
@optimistgardener "wrinkly old eggs" has me chuckling at my desk this morning that's a good one. Exciting that things are starting to shape up for your next ER, though I know how much those deposits hurt (almost as much as the pointy stabby things). I'm also howling at your wedding stories, especially the one with the bouquet. I hate those kinds of traditions too and we did none of it at our own wedding. No registry signing, no bouquet or garter toss, etc. I've been in that same situation of being frozen in place while a $120 bouquet is hurtling at my head and not wanting to be the one caught with it. Thankfully (?) someone has always shoved me out of the way in time. 
@acleverusername happy belated birthday sweet friend!! I'm glad you had a nice weekend away, ahead of your upcoming cycle. Hope your eggies arrived safe and sound today! Sorry the Canadian gov't is such a PITA, they're kind of the worst these days about not wanting to take accountability for anything. As for your wedding laxatives, ROTFL. Forget pre-marital counselling, stick a couple in a tiny AirBnB for a few days with only one bathroom and with one (or both) of you having digestive troubles. Instant bonding.   On the first vacation I went on with MH (we had been dating for maybe 5 months at the time?), we stayed in a tiny B&B in the middle of nowhere in Newfoundland and the ensuite bathrooms didn't have doors, just a measly 4ft tall accordion-style vinyl ... partition? Open on the top and the bottom. Well, let me tell you, I don't think either of us went to the bathroom for 2 days. We finally went out to sit in the lounge to watch tv one night and we each had to sneak off to use the bathroom. After that we got over it pretty quick lol. 
@hanshotfirst77 FX you can get the testing going ASAP! I love that you were able to do your wedding your way, that's how it should be. 

kiki047

Diagnosis (if you've been):  PCOS, RPL/RIF, "mild" MFI 

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA):  WTO 

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?):  Well, in a shocking turn of events, I started stims yesterday so I guess we're off to the races!

As you know, I spoke to the new REI on Thursday night regarding our test results. Everything came back pretty much normal, nothing that points to any one thing, which is good... I think? He said our best plan of action is to bank euploid embryos then we'll talk FETs. He asked when I wanted to get started, and I immediately said "I'm ready whenever you are!" He asked when AF was due, I said Friday - as in the next day - and he was like, "GREAT! Email us on CD1 and we'll book you in for monitoring". And so here we are. AF arrived late Friday night, I called in my CD1 on Saturday, went in yesterday for monitoring, met with the Dr, met with the nurse, still don't really know what's going on but here we are! 

How are things going?:  Good so far! The clinic is SO different from my last one, it's gigantic and they do everything in-house (except for some of the specialized testing that gets sent out), including the PGT. I was right in that monitoring is a 2-3 hour excursion, plus travel time, but they do BW & US and have all the results back in time for the Dr to meet with you afterwards. They only dispense medication for a few days at at time to reduce waste, and I only had to put down a deposit up front for the meds. Thankfully I still have some left over from last cycle that hasn't expired yet so I can use that up and save a bit of $$. I don't go back for another scan until Thursday. 

Cycle stats and starting dosages in spoiler. 

AFC was 40 - R 21 and L 19

Starting dosages:
Gonal-F - 262.5, Menopur 75 for the first 3 days

I'm a little put off by this because when I asked him he said he would "drastically" change my protocol from last time but so far it's almost the same as my last cycle where I started at Gonal-F 250 and Menoupur 75, then went down to 37.5. But hey, whatever gets the job done. 

Any questions?:  Those of you who have done a short (antagonist) protocol, how many days did you stim? I'm trying to do the mental math in my head on when my ER might be. I think in the past my ERs have been on CD14. I have an all day strategic planning retreat on the 23rd that I absolutely cannot miss so I'm somewhat concerned that I'm going to be out of commission that day. 

GTKY: What's the most funny/weird thing that happened during your wedding or someone else's wedding that you like to talk about? 

The first thing that comes to mind is one of the chairs we rented just randomly collapsing underneath one of our guests in the middle of dinner. It must've had a fault already because he wasn't doing anything rowdy and he wasn't particularly big or overweight, we just heard a yelp and saw the whole table rush over and at first we thought someone fainted, until they all burst out laughing. He was fine, we apologized, our wedding planner yelled at the rental company, all's well that ends well. 

Spoilering the rest for length:

Our favourite funny moment from our wedding was the best man's speech. MH and his best man have the same name, and my name is a homophone (sounds the same but spelled differently). Let's just say MH's name is Sidney. So Best Man Sidney goes up to give his speech and he decides to play a game he called "Sidney, Sidney or Sydney?" in which he read questions like "Who ripped their pants when they were squatting to pick up a golf ball?" and the entire wedding party was given cards with Sidney (groom), Sidney (best man) and Sydney (bride) on them and they had to hold up their guess. He had the entire room howling. We chose not to get a videographer but in hindsight I wish I had that on camera because it was pretty epic. Even his wife looked a little skeptical because she was supposed to vet his speech and he did this entirely on his own. She gave me a couple panicked "I'm so sorry" looks when he started, but once he got going we all relaxed and had a good laugh. 

Speaking of speeches, my Mom and MH had a weight loss bet going into the wedding that whoever lost the most weight got to pick what the other person would wear for their speeches. Well... my Mom lost by a landslide and so she had to wear a giant purple plastic bag over her dress. She was a good sport about it, but I would imagine it was pretty hot in there lol. We have some funny pictures of her in it. 

My very drunk brother was also dancing with my very drunk friend because her H isn't a dancer, and at one point he spun her really hard but they missed the connection and instead of grabbing her hand he threw her halfway across the room where she crashed into a bunch of chairs and almost took out an entire table. Thankfully she was sufficiently inebriated that she was basically rubber and just bounced back up and kept on dancing as if nothing happened. She was black and blue the next day, and now it's a running joke that whenever my brother wants to dance someone says "ok, but don't throw me into that table". 

kiki047

Oh, thought of another wedding story ... I went to a friend's wedding and the officiant absolutely could NOT pronounce the groom's name. His name was "Anil", pronounced "Ah-neel". Well, as you can imagine, he called him "anal" at least 5 times before someone corrected him, after which he would just pause before he said it and still got it wrong 50% of the time. You don't really realize how many times they say your name during a wedding ceremony until someone calls you "anal" the whole time and the rest of the room attempts to muffle their snickering. 

This was the same wedding where the bride's dress/train was so long that she turned around on their tiny little platform they were standing on and knocked her MOH off the stage. She also did a wardrobe change partway through dinner and I guess they were having issues because she was gone for over an hour. 

inthewoods23

@kiki047 I. am. DYING

Sounds like we both have very fun families and very fun weddings!

You know, I don't even know what my protocol was called lol. I guess I actually had the lupron overlap/down regulation protocol now that I've googled it. I ended up doing 9 days of gonal-f and menopur, triggered the next day, then 2 days later had the retrieval. That did come out to the ER being on CD14.

shortstack930

@inthewoods23 sounds like you had quite the wedding!!

@walkawaynee yikes that sounds like an awkward wedding for sure. Hope you guys get everything sorted out with the retrieval stuff.

@optimistgardener I'm glad you've had a bit of a distraction from TTC stuff! 

@acleverusername happy belated birthday! Yay for your eggs finally making their way stateside!

@hanshotfirst77 I love that you were able to make your wedding totally your own!!

@kiki047 glad you've started stims!! Hopefully the new clinic works out well.

Diagnosis (if you've been): Endometriosis

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA):  WTO

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?):  FET!!

How are things going?:  Ugh all of this estrogen has totally made me gain weight which sucks. But I have an ultrasound tomorrow to check my lining and hopefully if it looks good we will schedule our FET for sometime this month!!

Any questions?:  Not yet

GTKY: What's the most funny/weird thing that happened during your wedding or someone else's wedding that you like to talk about?  At my wedding, a couple of DH's friends got drunk and started trying to undress him on the dance floor. My mom saw me giving them a dirty look and went over and yelled "NO WE DON'T DO THAT HERE" and they stopped. It was hilarious and I was totally grateful!

LJMoon6

Last week got away from me! Man, I suck at this!

@inthewoods23 I always just keep moving my fingers around during a blood draw. I don’t know if it actually helps, but I like to think it does lol. I hate the insurance crap you have to go through! Blah!

@walkawaynee Your clinics policy sounds super frustrating! Do you have any previous cycles to know how you’ll respond?

@optimistgardener I’m so sorry your insurance company wasn’t clear on when the policy is starting. I would be soooo pissed. It sounds like you’ve decided to just go ahead with it as planned? I would probably do the same, especially with the timing being better for your schedule.

@acleverusername I seriously can’t do anything by laugh at this point at my clinic. I just don’t understand how they can be this bad. Like, I would understand if she had told me she’s in training, and then had a hard time. But for her not to say anything and then act like it was the machine’s fault and not hers…. Um, no. I actually read a study last week about lining too. It basically said anything above 5 was fine. There’s no statistical difference in success rates with lining thickness between 5 and some other thick number. It still just makes me so nervous. Any other time my lining has been nice and thick (8.8mm). Gah, I can’t believe the hoops you had to jump though to get you eggs transferred. That sounds like suck a headache! FX they get to you soon! Happy belated birthday!

@hanshotfirst77 The waiting always sucks! Where are you going on vacation to next month?

@kiki047 Yay yay yay! That was fast! I’m so excited for you to be starting treatment.

@shortstack930 Yay for FET! I hear you on the weight gain. It’s been hard to accept. Hold on. You’re so close!

 

Diagnosis (if you've been):  Unexplained

 

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA):  TWW

 

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?):  IUI was last Friday

 

How are things going?:  Things are going ok. MH’s numbers were much higher last week for the IUI. I’m pretty happy about that. Not sure why they would change so much though. Nothing in his routine has changed. Oh well. I’ll take it. Still worried about my thin lining but nothing I can do about it at this point. I will push to go back to the lower dose of letrozole though if this cycle doesn’t work. My RE already said she wanted to keep me at the same dosage but I think I’ll just tell her I’m not comfortable with it.

 

Any questions?:  So, hear me out on this theory. On the lower dose of letrozole I only produce 1 follicle. I’ve only ever started it on CD3. If I produced 5 follicles on the higher dose of letrozole starting it on CD3, but only produced 2 when starting it on CD4, would taking the lower dose starting on CD2 make any difference??? Like producing more follicles? Sorry if that doesn’t make any sense lol.

 

GTKY: What's the most funny/weird thing that happened during your wedding or someone else's wedding that you like to talk about? The only thing that I can think of is that my bff/bridesmaid slept with my brother after the wedding lol. They called me the next morning for a ride. They are 100% not each other’s type lol.

bumblebee0210

It's hoppin' on here today!

@LJMoon6. On letrozole dosing, I don't know the answer, but I will tell you that cycle-to-cycle variation is huge, and it's likely that the only first-order important things driving your follicles is the med dose, and whether it's a good month. Likely everything else is secondary. 

@shortstack930. Woot woot! It's getting so close! I'm hoping to be right after you in early Nov. 

@kiki047 I have had six antagonist cycles, and always stimmed between 10 and 13 days. For some, it is as few as 8 days, but I think 10 is the norm and old hags/DORs like me stim longer. 

@acleverusername. Happy birthday, friend!! Glad your eggs are on route that seems like a nightmare. Are you stimming right now or WTO to then start stimming on like O+7?

@walkawaynee Are you doing PGT? I can't remember. I am probably biased on this (or at least my opinion is known) but I would put the money down to do two retrievals if you have DOR. Worst case scenerio you spend some money you wouldn't have otherwise, but are happily pregnant and maybe have an embryo or two in the future. But more likely is that you don't get more than 1-2 euploid embryos (if that) from the first one, and then transfer fails, or there is no euploid embryo, and you have to wait to start all over. For reference, I have DOR and I only got 2 euploid embryos in my first 4 egg retrievals. I think it also depends on whether you want more kids in the future. Just my take!

@inthewoods23. I feel like the phlebotomists are generally good at this-- the stress ball, clench/unclench fist moves, etc. I don't have any other thoughts than water.

@optimistgardener. Did I miss what you are deciding to do re: this year vs. next?


AFM: Boring week, just WFAF and those blast results. I have an appointment with my RE on Friday to talk transfer!

acleverusername

Loving this thread today!

@kiki047 OMG all of your wedding stories have me in tears. I also don't get how you can't pronounce Anil correctly. A kneel. Easy. Lol. So happy you got started, but it does puzzle me that your drastically different protocol is actually the same. But as you said, whatever gets you the results you're hoping for!

@shortstack930 Argh, see my note in Health Goals thread this week. I've gained 20lbs in 1 year, and I haven't done any estrogen patches yet. I just keep telling myself that there will be time for weight loss after we have our THBs. 

@LJMoon6 so it totally makes sense that taking a lower dose earlier makes a difference. Now doctors will tell you that starting on Day 2 or Day 3 doesn't matter, but in my case, it does make a difference. For example, when I was doing Clomid earlier on in my journey, if I started on CD3, I would recruit 1 follicle. If I started on CD2, I'd recruit 2. Now, the sample size is small, but whatever... just let me start on CD2, okay? Follicle recruitment is the technical term. If your brain starts to release FSH naturally, it can trigger follicle recruitment. So, in the last cycle, there was already some initial natural preference for follicles shaping by Day 4, when you started the meds. So, the medication just reinforced the recruitment of those preferred follicles. But if you start on CD2, the preference isn't likely there yet, so by adding medication at that point, you can most likely recruit more follicles with less meds. But, what do I know... I'm just an "armchair RE" over here.  

Guys, I forgot to mention a key part to my wedding story: I wasn't alone in my room when I was having to dis-impact myself. My makeup artist was already there, and was my sister, and my surrogate mom & dad. So, there was quite the audience to this situation and everyone was just being encouraging. Lol. 

I've already got 2 updates for you: 

1. My eggs have arrived at my clinic in SF! Wooooooo! I can breathe a sign of relief. 
2. I went in for an E2/P4 check today because I still haven't gotten my LH surge (on CD20; it's clinic's policy to "trust, but verify") and it came back at 70.7/0.36 respectively. Ergo, Sergio is NO WHERE NEAR. In the words of my coordinator, "there's not a lot happening there." So they're having me take 2.5mg Letrazole starting today in hopes of recruiting a follicle. I've got a baseline appointment tentatively scheduled for next Thursday (Oct 21) so let's hope that I'll get something to happen between now and then. 

optimistgardener

wow this thread today. i'm going to do my best to catch up here. apologies if i reply to a couple of folks in 2 different places.

@walkawaynee i'm with you on the limbo status. re: your clinic's policy in doing b2b cycles, they sound like they might be a small clinic? It's my impression that small clinics can have funkier scheduling issues, especially as they try to protect the calendar of the REs they have on staff (I believe ours has only two, with only the senior person who deals with IVF patients). I actually think my clinic tries to set it up so they're like "one month is egg retrievals, the next month is transfers," keeping as many patients on the same basic calendar as possible. I've not asked their policy on b2bs but I've had them tell me they prefer that patients have "time outs" between cycles. I guess this may be one of the downsides to a smaller clinic.

@acleverusername, @LJMoon6, and @bumblebee0210 I guess I'm going ahead with my retrieval this November/December. This may seem unnecessarily extreme, but I really feel like I am aging out of any potential I have left quickly. Even though I'm only 38, I think my RE is probably on to something when he says my 1 ovary may make me in a sense biologically older (at least as far as my reproductive potential is concerned). I am lucky enough to be able to suck that up financially, although obviously it would have been waaay better if it were covered by insurance.

@hanshotfirst77 loved reading abut your unconventional wedding, and glad you're able to keep a claim on that memory regardless of the fate of the relationship.

@kiki047 yay!! day 2 of stims! that happened really quickly? I suppose i've not been keeping super close track of your calendar but it definitely crept up on me. i hope it goes well! in contrast w/ @bumblebee0210's experience, my stim lengths, despite being deep into DOR, have always been short. So my last cycle I started stims on day "3" (actually day 2 but this was a little lie between me and the clinic), stimmed for 6 days, and pulled the trigger on cd 9 for a cd 11 retrieval. Looking back at my 2 medicated IUIs, i stimmed for 6 days and 5 days respectively. My IVF cycle was the short antagonist, with menopur and gonal-f, starting cetrotide for the last couple of days of stims, and triggering cd 9 (edited because my brain is mush and i was mis-identifying my trigger drug).

@LJMoon6 FX for the IUI! did you trigger? I forget. I'm with Bumblebee that your letrozole dose is really only one part of the equation, with your follicles making up another really important part of it. I'm also totally with Clever when she says that the difference between Day 2 vs Day 3 is real. My overeager ovary is already well down the road to recruiting its primary follicle by day 3, and sometimes even day 2 seems like it's pushing it for me. So you may well get better recruitment #s earlier. also omg about your brother and the friend/bridesmaid! I hope you've been able to rib them about it since then.

@bumblebee0210 i'm looking forward to hearing about your RE's plans for the transfer! Glad you get a little bit of a break before they start pumping you up with drugs again. got my fingers crossed for more good numbers from your day5 results.

@acleverusername yay! so glad your eggs made it to their destination! Also HAPPY BIRTHDAY (a little late here on this)!!

hanshotfirst77

@kiki75 yay for starting stims! Fx!

@shortstack930 yay for FET good luck!

@LJMoon6 Fx for your IUI. I had a few cycles where we played with the Letrozole doses and I had better luck on the lower dose. 

@bumblebee0210 Fx for your results and so exciting you can move forward with a transfer soon looks like a lot of us may be doing one soonish. 

bumblebee0210

@walkawaynee I have been thinking about your 1 vs 2 cycle predicament and I don’t 100% know your deal, but I’m going to make some educated guesses that you don’t have any kids yet, and may want 2 kids. Statistically, you want 2 euploid embryos for each kid, but if you’re feeling lucky let’s say 3 euploid total. With 3 euploid transfers you have an excellent (like 95% chance) of one pregnancy and like a 60% chance of 2, something like that. You are 40– which means your aneuploidy rate is going to be high, over 70%. You have DOR which means the likelihood of more than 2 or 3 blastocysts per cycle is low. So you’re talking, in a good month where all goes well, maybe one euploid embryo. Maybe none (even if everything goes right! It’s just an age thing).  If this is your scenario, you are most likely looking at 3-6 egg retrievals for your 3 euploid embryos.

I am not trying to bum you out, I promise. And really, truly, you could be one of the lucky few who gets a bunch of good blasts at 40. But odds are, it will be a slog. A doable slog! But a slog. 

I’m telling you this because I went into IVF with the mindset that it was going to take 3-6 cycles to get what we wanted (5-6 euploid, and I am 34 with DOR), and I think it helped immensely with the roller coaster of emotions to go in planning for that. It also helped things move quickly because I could do things back-to-back (ask about duostim!) rather than waiting for results to decide to start another cycle. I have done 6 egg retrieval cycles in a little over 6 months, and we have gotten 4 euploid and 2 mosaic embryos, with hopefully one or two more to test from the last cycle. 

The other reason you might want to do more egg retrievals now is that even if you do get pregnant now, and you decide you want another in, say, 2 years, you may be SOL for more egg retrievals. Everyone ages differently, but the dropoff from 40 to 42 is typically pretty significant.

Sorry this was an absolute novel and I’m on my phone so I can’t even spoiler it. And you can feel free to just like totally disregard all of this, it’s your body! But I just want to make sure you are going in with eyes wide open, and all the info you need to make the right decision for you. I recommend the egg whisperer (podcast, blog) for some clear-eyed advice and realistic expectations.

kiki047

@Shortstack930 ohh the weight gain. Yup, I hear you on that one. It's a real kick in the crotch when all of these hormones make us look and feel pregnant when we're not. Hope your US goes well today and you can get that FET scheduled! Also, your Mom sounds awesome lol. 
@inthewoods23 I'd like to think that we would have enjoyed each other's weddings if we were friends IRL. I've been to some pretty dry weddings... I made a lot of notes on what NOT to do. I'd like to think ours was anything but dry (and I'm not just talking about the tears, OR a lack of alcohol ) 
@LJMoon6 sperm count is also a mystery to us as we've had wide variations in numbers for SAs/IUIs/IVF, so hopefully this is a good sign if he had a sudden uptick! LOL to your bff hooking up with your brother, omg. Has that been awkward at all since? I may have hooked up with my friend's brother too but it was months after the wedding (the flirting may have started there though...) and now we made it weird lol. I don't actually know if she knows, I certainly didn't tell her. He might've though. Thankfully she lives in France and he lives in Germany so I don't see either of them much these days. 
@bumblebee0210 thanks for your input! I'm afraid I'll be pretty standard and of course my work commitment falls on the exact date that I'm expecting to have my ER. I'll talk to them tomorrow and see what they think. Obviously I'll miss it if I have to but we've been preparing for this for a year, and I'm leading one of the sessions, so if we can plan around it then I'm hoping it'll work out. I didn't see your update from last week until last night about your surprise extra eggs but !!!!!! that's incredible! Keeping everything crossed for you for great results from this last cycle so you can close this chapter and focus on your FET.  
@acleverusername oh.my.god. Yes that little detail makes the story that much better. LOL. I am SO relieved for you that your eggies made it to your clinic, but sorry Sergio is AWOL. FX the Letrozole does the trick and you'll be back on track soon.
@optimistgardener you didn't miss anything, I wasn't expecting to start stims until next cycle considering we only had ~36 hours notice. With my old clinic we had to jump through all sorts of hoops before I was allowed to start - go in, sign all the consent forms, do the mandatory education session for meds/etc even though I'd been through it all before, etc. Then I had to be on BCP for a month before I started. I was NOT expecting to be allowed to start literally right away. That really threw me for a loop; so while I'm grateful and thrilled to be moving forward, I'm also feeling rather unsettled because this was not my original plan, I have commitments this month that are important to me, and I don't like feeling like we don't know what's going on because we're being rushed. I'm an Enneagram Type One through and through, this has me all out of sorts so I'm just trying to roll with it. 


AFM, stims are going well, I think I figured out the trick to the menopur so I don't get the massive welts this time. I mixed the diluent with the powder at least 2-4 hours in advance and leave it in the fridge until I need it. And I also use 1.25-1.5ml of the diluent instead of 1ml so it's more diluted. Same med dosage in the end. It takes longer to inject but I have no bruising and no welts which has never happened before. 

In other news, I got stung in the face by a wasp on the weekend (twice) and it hurt at the time but I took a benadryl right away and it seemed ok. But yesterday and today it has been getting progressively more swollen and now I look like I got punched in the eye lol. Are antihistamines (Reactine, Benadryl) safe while on stims? I should think so, this isn't a transfer cycle. 

inthewoods23

@shortstack930 oh man that must have been a sight at the wedding haha. Yay for getting the FET scheduled soon!

@LJMoon6 I'd love to hear other people's theories because I have no idea! I never understand how it could matter just based on which CDs you start. I wanna say I always started on CD5 since baseline monitor could be anywhere between CD2 and 4? I know the days I started for my IUIs were always the same but the first time I had started producing 2 follicles but 1 eventually took over. I've always wondered why or how some can get more follicles like that.

@bumblebee0210 this transfer has been a long time coming! yay!

@acleverusername anyone have Sergio's phone number to tell him to hurry up? but glad your eggs arrived!

@kiki047 lol!! my mom's side definitely likes to let loose at weddings. I'm pretty sure my FIL had to run out and buy more alcohol because what they had stocked wasn't enough even though in the contract there's supposed to be no outside beverages. A couple people had drinks at the hotel bar that night when it was over. Glad things are going well with the menopur but OUCH with the wasp!! Yikes! I would assume antihistamines are okay, but it's not fertility meds are ever mentioned in the warnings. And like you said, it's not a transfer cycle so it's probably less of a concern.

LJMoon6

@bumblebee0210 You’re right. The cycle-to-cycle variation can’t be discounted. I always have a problem with that. My professors always used to joke that I should be a theoretical physicist, but here I am, in the applied engineering role lol.

@acleverusername Thank you! You’ve convinced me that I’m not crazy lol. And you’ve given me some great technical terms and a scientific explanation that I can use to word my email to my pathetic clinic. I’m so happy your eggs have arrived!! Will you start fertilizing them right away or wait till after your next ER?

@optimistgardener We did trigger. I did not get a surge before trigger this time, so I’m hoping this will be perfect timing. My lead follicle would have been about 19.5 by the time of trigger. I’m slightly worried the other mature “follicle” was a cyst (would have been 18), since I had 1 measuring at 13 already on CD4. Or I guess it could have been the other way around and the 19.5 was the cyst and the 18 was a follicle. Who knows. Thank you for also making me feel less crazy lol. I hate when the nurses keep repeating the same old lines, “it makes no difference starting on CD2-CD5,” when clearly there is. Smh.

@hanshotfirst77 I definitely like the lower dose of Letrozole too. I read a study once that said the lowest does of letrozole had the highest success rate. It’s pretty clear to me too that the higher dose is impacting my lining. Which is strange since I’ve only heard of clomid doing that. But I can’t just ignore it.

@kiki047 Omg. That’s hilarious. I really don’t care that they slept together. I just think it’s so funny because I know how wrong they are for each other lol. Luckily, my friend lives in Arizona and my brother lives in Wisconsin, so they don’t see each other… ever. I don’t think they’ve actually seen each other since the event. I am super jealous that you have a friend that lives in France though. It’s always been my dream to move there. Anywhere in Europe would be nice actually lol. I spent a semester there 10+ years ago. Omg, your poor face! I’m so sorry you got stung and are still swollen from it! Ouch!

@inthewoods23 I really have no idea either lol. But it seems like it does make a difference. I hate IF so much. Mostly because there’s so many unknowns to the whole thing. Lol, your wedding sounds like mine. Our venue ran out of booze too! Smh. Wisconsin weddings, am I right?!

walkawaynee

So much has happened here this week! I will be back later for tags.

 In the meantime @bumblebee0210 I really appreciate the straight forward insight! We are doing testing and I know that 2 retrievals (or more) is the smart plan, I am just frustrated that our clinic doesn't make it easy. They act like its obsurd to assume I will need more than 1 ER. We really only want 1 child but I honestly would like to bank if possible because I feel like minds could change and like you said retrieval at 42/43 is working against odds. I CANNOT however get an answer from my insurance on if they will cover back to back retrievals if we get embryos from the first one. 

Loving all these wedding stories. Scandalous one night stands,  bathroom blunders, drunk people it's all so entertaining! 

acleverusername

@LJMoon6 re: eggs that just arrived, the plan is to fertilize them at the same time as we're fertilizing the eggs from upcoming retrieval. Because insurance makes that the only logically affordable option. 🤷‍♀️

shortstack930

@LJMoon6 I hope so much that this IUI worked for you! When is your beta?

@bumblebee0210 fingers crossed for those blast results!!

@acleverusername so glad your eggs made it safely!!

@kiki047 ugh Menopur is the WORST! I used to tell DH it felt like liquid fire going in. Glad you're able to avoid the welts. That's awful about the wasp but I definitely think you should be fine taking Benadryl during stims.

AFM: My ultrasound went well this morning and they've scheduled our FET for next Friday 10/22!! I have to start PIO this Sunday and holy hell those needles are HUGE!!!

inthewoods23

Omg I did a thing and opened up to my dad about seeing an RI

I was so proud of myself for actually saying something that I didn't mind the "you can always adopt" comment. Why my dad of all people and not my mom lol. I guess he was the first to ask me about that topic ever since I decided I wanted to FB post what I'm current doing *tw* on my loss anniversary later this month *end tw*.

kiki047

@inthewoods23 we ran out of alcohol at our wedding too, but that's because the venue coordinator is a dummy. That's kind of nice that your Dad asked about it, go Dad! I always assume my parents talk about it amongst themselves and decide who's going to ask me about it first, then compare answers later lol. Our losses were around the same time so I have also been back and forth on whether I'm going to post something for PAIL, even if it is at the very end of the month. So far I have had precisely one friend (outside of my TB group) reach out to me to say that she's thinking about me after seeing so many other PAIL posts. That really meant a lot. 
@LJMoon6 I've only been back to France once since their wedding and I'm dying to take MH. He's never been to Europe, or anywhere outside of North America for that matter - Hawaii is the furthest he's been from home. We had plans to go to Portugal in April 2020 but, well, we all know how that turned out. I still have flight credits that I haven't been able to use yet. 
@shortstack930 I tried to explain what the Menopur felt like to MH too and liquid fire is about as close as it gets. At the time I was almost glad I had a few welts so I had some kind of physical sign of how awful it was. Except that they took days to go away and in the meantime I had to keep giving myself more injections in the same areas. It sucked. The PIO isn't as bad as it looks, I promise. I also have a ritual for PIO and it has worked really well for me. I think I've done 17 weeks total of PIO between 3 FETs and a fresh transfer and by the end even my extremely squeamish, needle-phobic husband was able to give me my shots. This is the man that has to lie down to get a flu shot. Will YH help with your shots are are you self-administering? 

shortstack930

@kiki047 I was planning on self-administering since I'm an RN and have given plenty of IM shots before but it seems like they may be difficult to give to yourself. DH said he would do it for me but I may be more scared of him coming at me with a needle than just doing it on my own lol. And he probably won't be home most of the time since I have to do them in the mornings.

acleverusername

@inthewoods23 Go You! And Go Dad! But seriously, why is adoption the assumed only other path? I haven't posted anything related to IF on my Facebook although many of my friends know what I'm going through. But I've been wondering if I should. Dunno. Anyways, I'm glad you had this convo with your Dad. I wish my own dad had anything other than "I told you should you have gotten pregnant when you were 32" to say to me. Alas. I digress. 

@kiki047 I'll come back to you for notes & tips on how to get a squeamish husband to administer PIO shots without him fainting and falling on top of needle/me. 

@shortstack930 I've had a friend who's done all her PIO shots. I think it's just a matter of how limber you are. 

optimistgardener

@shortstack930 i haven't done a lot of PIO but i did a few days' worth and I self-administered. I just stood there, made sure everything was nice and relaxed, and plunged the needle in. honestly i hardly felt the shot in the moment, although i was slightly weirded out by the process of pulling the plunger back a wee bit to make sure you're not in a vein. i'm not sure what size needle they're having you use but make sure you're not mis-identifying the large "drawing" needle that you pull the oil up into the syringe with, vs. the somewhat narrower needle gauge that you actually inject with! The drawing needle is hella scary big.

bumblebee0210

@walkawaynee. Ugh, I'm sorry that is very annoying about your clinic. Is it the actual RE who is saying this, or the nurses/clinic staff? If there is something I have learned in this process (and being married to a physician) is that you need to just bypass those people and talk to the RE. If it's the RE who seems to be balking at the idea of multiple ERs for a 40-year-old woman with DOR with no kids, I find that a little worrying. Don't forget (as long as there aren't insurance issues, though even then if it's an option for you you can pay OOP for an extra retrieval), you can just insist that you want to bank embryos and PGT test them before transfers. A lot of clinic staff especially are very resistant to anyone doing things differently than the norm, but it's your body, your family, your money-- they don't get a say. 

fantasyflyte

*sort of lurking-but-dipping-my-toes-in/preparing to de-lurk?*

We have our first appointment/consultation scheduled with an RE for November 3. @acleverusername already gave me a couple great links for what to expect/what to ask at the first appointment, but I was wondering if anyone here had their first appointment/consult virtually? Our consultation is a virtual visit, so I'm not sure if it'll be different than a "typical" first appointment.

If it makes a difference, my doctor ran CD3 bloodwork over the summer and has me on metformin for PCOS, and she ordered a semen analysis for my husband over the summer that came back with low morphology and therefore lowish motility. The SA was done by the same RE office that we'll be going to, with the results sent to my ob. She had him start taking vitamins E and C in the meantime while we wait for our appointment.

inthewoods23

@fantasyflyte my consult with the RI was virtual and was pretty much the same as the in person consult I had with the RE years ago. It's primarily discussion of your health history, your TTC journey so far, what tests you've already done and the like. Since you've already done the CD3 bloodwork you might just go right into a treatment plan of IUI or IVF when your next cycle starts unless there are other things the RE wants to look at. Did you have an ultrasound to look at your ovaries and get an AFC? They may want to do that first.

optimistgardener

@fantasyflyte my RE consult last winter was also virtual. If I had any recommendations, I'd say prepare a calendar for yourself so you remember how many months of what you've tried, cycle lengths, etc., and also think about you are looking for in an RE outside of just basic medical competence. My RE asked me a lot of questions about family history of IF, which I probably should have expected but did not (my dad's mother had 9 live births that we know of, and my other gran had 3 kids in her mid-thirties one right after the other, so no problems on that front here!). I found that I hit it off well with my RE right away. I had gone in to the meeting pre-emptively defensive about my desire to have a child without a partner, and also prepared to have to explain or justify my at times unconventional methods (occasional known donor, early efforts at self-insemination using frozen sperm, etc.). I found it so comforting that he didn't blink at anything I put in front of him, and instead was supportive and expressed his happiness that i had taken my own initiative in appropriate ways. We even wound up sharing a moment of frustration together regarding how poorly our society does at supporting women's joint goals in building families and in their professional careers. I think your job in this meeting is on the one hand to give your RE the information they will need to treat you medically, but also for you to size up your RE and get a sense of whether you will be comfortable sharing some pretty intimate details of your life with them. Ask questions about whether they have dealt with other clients who have similar histories to your own, if that makes sense to do.

kiki047

@fantasyflyte my initial consult with the RE I just switched to was also virtual. Like optimist and ITW mentioned, it will most likely be primarily fact-finding, asking about your medical history, cycle data, etc for both yourself and YH. The follow up to that would be any next steps such as filling in any gaps for tests that still have to be done, etc. Have you had an HSG (hysterosalpingogram) or SHG (sonohysterogram) done yet? That's good YH has already started taking supplements since sperm take ~74 days to regenerate, meaning you need around 2-3 months before you start to see any measurable results. 

@Shortstack930 I started off by doing my own PIO for the first few months and it wasn't so bad. I recommend lying on the couch or bed on your side with a pillow between your legs and your top knee bent (the side you're doing the injection on). Rule of thumb is to inject it in the upper outer quadrant of your butt cheek, in the fleshy/fatty part there. I recommend using a heating pad before AND after, and warming the oil a bit beforehand by putting the bottle in your bra or armpit because the oil is quite viscous and thick. It'll be easier to draw into the syringe and inject if it's warm. I used to lay it on my heating pad for a minute while I prepped everything else. Honestly it didn't really hurt, little pinch if the needle was dull but otherwise the anticipation of it was always worse than the actual shot. I only had a bleeder a handful of times out of 100+ shots (those were the times MH almost puked lol). And heat/massage the area after a few mins of pressure to disperse the oil and to make sure you don't develop the really painful knots (I still have my knots that developed this time last year and only got worse with the 2 cycles I've had since then). 


Man, I'm loving the fact that this clinic doesn't over-monitor me. I went in Monday, went back today, and don't go back until Sunday. I don't have any updated cycle stats, just that things are looking good, targeting next Friday or Saturday (gah) for ER. Increasing menopur to 150 today (god help me) and adding cetrotide on Saturday. I haven't used cetrotide before, is it basically the same as lupron? No surprises there, right? 

acleverusername

@kiki047 interesting that you haven’t used Cetrotide or Ganerelix before. That’s the antagonist to keep you from ovulating prematurely. I guess that’s one area where your current protocol is different then. I hope it has the intended effect! Lupron, by contrast, is an agonist and supposedly it does the same thing but makes an IVF cycle longer? I dunno. This is the first I’ve heard of a protocol without an antagonist so I’m just reading stuff off the internets.

Heads up that Cetrotide can be itchy. I experienced that when I did my ER 2 years ago, but didn’t find that to be the case back in July. But maybe that’s because I was icing the injection area really well. 

kiki047

@acleverusername thank you! I used a micro dose of lupron last time starting on CD1 through to the day I triggered. In all my reading about different protocol types, this part confused me because normally the lupron flare protocol is for poor responders or DOR, and the lupron is usually started in the LP of the previous cycle. So mine was kind of a hybrid of the two? thanks for the heads up on the cetrotide. I do ice the area before my shot so hopefully that helps. Did you do all of your injections at the same time? They're having me do all 3 at the same time and I'm find it to be a bit much, I want to spread them out but I also don't want to mess with the timing of everything mid-cycle so I think I'm kinda stuck. 

optimistgardener

@kiki047 the cetrotide was the only thing amongst all the stuff i've injected myself with that gave me a screaming red welt and was painful as i was injecting it (i did just fine with the menopur). my nurse said something about how the style of needle used is a little different, maybe blunter? as well. I hope the icing helps. I'm surprised they're having you do all the injections together! my clinic was very particular about having me do one in the morning, one in the evening.