A week ago, today I had to say goodbye to my baby boy, Alex. It all started a week before that when I woke up Saturday night with a sharp pain in my chest/ ribs that radiated in my back. The first time it happened I though I had just slept weird, but when it happened the next two nights, I contacted my doctor. My doctor had me come in and check by blood pressure and my urine for protein, but both were normal. She believed that I had pulled a muscle since taking Tylenol took away the pain. She told me that if it did not go away in the next few days to call her back. The pain did not go away and became worse to the point where it happened several times a day. My doctor had me come in for blood test that week Friday. On Saturday she called me and said that my liver enzymes were slightly elevated and that my platelet count was a little low. To be on the safe side she wanted me to come to the hospital to run more tests. Sunday morning my liver enzymes had take a dive and my platelet count was very low, I was diagnosed with Hellp Syndrome. Hellp Syndrome is an extreme form of preeclampsia that starts to show down your organs. Nobody really knows what causes Hellp Syndrome, but the only cure is to deliver the baby. So last week Sunday my doctor induced me and after 36 hours I gave birth the Alex. Alex was only 21 weeks and was too young to survive. My baby boy was prefect and I feel like my body failed him. This last week has been pure hell. I feel so lost and all I want is to have my baby boy back, I would give anything to make that happen. My heart is truly broken, and I don’t know how to move on.