I have literally never posted on a discussion forum like this (though I’ve always wanted to-no better time than now huh?)
A few days ago, I found out that I am pregnant one month after suffering a chemical pregnancy.
A little about my situation:
I already have a 16 month old daughter. She was born strong and healthy and I feel endlessly grateful for her. It did take my husband and I two years to conceive her. And when I found out that I was pregnant with her, I remember the anxiety creeping in. I work in the birth community (worked for midwives and work at a center training doulas) and so I’ve seen the worst case scenarios. I was exposed to it even before I got pregnant. I remember not being able to fully enjoy my pregnancy until well into my second trimester.
Shortly after my daughter was born, I was getting the itch to have another child, but my husband wasn’t ready to start trying until my daughter turned a year. A month ago, I found out I was pregnant. I took several tests, all just faintly positive. Roughly two weeks later I experienced bleeding and pain and my midwife confirmed I had lost the baby.
I think many of you understand that heartache. It’s the kind of pain I never knew I could feel.
I have been working with an acupuncturist for several months to help my body (as I do have PCOS) and have been eating extremely clean and taking supplements and doing castor oil packs. Everything under the sun, I’ve done it.
After the miscarriage, I decided to heal my soul and take a month off from trying and the rigid no sugar no gluten no dairy no soy diet. Sorry TMI, a few weeks ago I got copious amounts of egg white cervical mucus. It gave me hope that my body is getting back on track and my husband and I made love several nights a week just because we wanted to. Which felt really amazing to have that connection without feeling there was an agenda.
I am so incredibly grateful to be pregnant again, only one month post. But I am struggling so much with the trust part. And so much anxiety. And I know that this is normal, but it really helps me to hear encouraging words and success stories to help me through this time of waiting.
I appreciate you all and thank you so much in advance.