March 2020 Moms
mrsvp614
member
STM+ October Discussion
mrsvp614
member
EDD/Weeks + Days:
How old is/are your other kid(s)?
How is/are your kiddo(s) doing?
What are you looking forward regarding adding to your family?
What concerns do you have regarding adding to your family?
Are you planning do to anything different for this birth, or are you wanting a similar experience to previous birth(s)?
How old is/are your other kid(s)?
How is/are your kiddo(s) doing?
What are you looking forward regarding adding to your family?
What concerns do you have regarding adding to your family?
Are you planning do to anything different for this birth, or are you wanting a similar experience to previous birth(s)?
Me: 33 DH: 33
Married: 10.15.16
Married: 10.15.16
BFP: 12.24.16
DS BD: 8.20.17
TTC #2 1.1.19
BFP #2 7.3.19
EDD #2 3.13.20
DS BD: 8.20.17
TTC #2 1.1.19
BFP #2 7.3.19
EDD #2 3.13.20
Re: STM+ October Discussion
DD/Weeks + Days: 3.10/17+1
How old is/are your other kid(s)? He turned two in August
How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? He's great! Peeing and pooping on the potty more frequently, including at daycare. We need to get more consistent to full on potty training. He's also super excited about Halloween, which is fun!
What are you looking forward regarding adding to your family? I can't wait to see DS1 as a big brother. He is making comments about baby brother "in there" (my belly) and kisses him goodnight, which is the sweetest!
What concerns do you have regarding adding to your family? I'm having emotional moments when I'm hugging DS and I'm worried about the impact on him, or me not having moments like that anymore. Rationally, I know I'll still have special moments with him and he will be fine, but there's just something about him being my first baby, that I'm worried what it'll be like when he's no longer my only baby.
Are you planning do to anything different for this birth, or are you wanting a similar experience to previous birth(s)? I've changed OB offices and hospitals, and hoping for a much better experience. I had major blood pressure issues and a 46 hour induction with DS1, who was under 5 lbs and growth restricted, which was a huge surprise, since he measured bigger than that in previous ultrasounds and NSS. He ended up spending a week in the NICU, which was honestly the worst week of my life. I have mad respect and sympathy for the moms who are in much worse situations, since a week is really a short blip in time.
I will more than likely have to be induced again this time, doc says 37-39 weeks. But I'm hoping that since my body has done it before, it's not as long and awful this time. I will DEFINITELY get the epidural much sooner this time, and not even attempt a med free birth. It's just not that important to me. My number one priority is for the baby to be healthy and hopefully no NICU stay this time around.
Married: 10.15.16
DS BD: 8.20.17
TTC #2 1.1.19
BFP #2 7.3.19
EDD #2 3.13.20
EDD/Weeks + Days: 3/10, 17w1d
How old is/are your other kid(s)? DD is 13, DS is 3.5
How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? DD has been extra forgetful lately, but I just got a note from her teacher praising her for being the only one that didn't act up when they had a substitute, so I can't be too mad at her. I really think she is trying. Just had a sleepover for her that went surprisingly well - the first time I've been really hands-off for one of her parties (didn't plan any structured activities.) her cross-country season is almost over, which she is glad about. DS has been begging for a Christmas tree lately for some odd reason. I appease him by telling him 'halloween first' and that seems to be ok with him since he likes trick-or-treating.
What are you looking forward regarding adding to your family? Can't wait for that 'full house' feeling of multiple kiddos, and looking forward to seeing DS as a big brother. He seems excited, though a little confused about the 'baby in the tummy' thing. Yesterday he said he had a baby in his tummy.
What concerns do you have regarding adding to your family? While I"m excited to have multiple kiddos, I"m also nervous about it! I worry that DD might get the short end of the stick more than I'd like, and that DS might decide to get jealous of losing the 'baby' status and become even more of a handful.
Are you planning do to anything different for this birth, or are you wanting a similar experience to previous birth(s)? I am leaning towards a natural birth like I did with DS - the birth itself was terrible back-labor, but in the end, the recovery time was smoother. I was induced with DD and had an epidural, and it took me longer to get back on my feet after that birth. Though.. the epidural does sound tempting, because natural birth isn't all romantic and lovely like people make it seem either... it's excruciating. (at least it was for me!) I guess what will really decide if this one is a natural birth or not boils down to DH. DH's support was instrumental in my natural birth, since he applied counter-pressure on my back the entire time while the nurses/midwife were nowhere to be found.
My friends are already planning a “sprinkle” for me and I feel like I can’t say no but I don’t really need anything. Especially if we’re having another girl. Actually I have a few specific things I need (another white noise machine, a new diaper bag, etc) but I don’t know if I should register? It seems a little tacky to have a registry of like 10 things. Idk.
i told my friends I’m all for eating some cake but I don’t really need anything. They aren’t listening to me though, haha.
How old is/are your other kid(s)? 2.5
How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? He’s doing pretty good. Struggling a bit with following directions and I’m not sure how much of it is just age appropriate and how much is him. Like in gymnastics he won’t do the warmups at all when he’s the second oldest in the class and most of those kids at least attempt to follow directions most of the time he’s either running wild or flops on the mat in a tantrum.
What are you looking forward regarding adding to your family? I can’t wait to see DS as a big brother and I’m excited for baby snuggles again!
What concerns do you have regarding adding to your family? I worry about DA not getting the attention he is used to and the new baby not getting as much as DS got. I worry about handling it when they both need me and I can only help 1.
Are you planning do to anything different for this birth, or are you wanting a similar experience to previous birth(s)? If it could go just like last time but be a little shorter and no NICU I’d be happy. I was induced last time and I kind of liked not having to rush to the hospital but it overall took about 24hrs from when my water broke to baby being born and a little over 3 hours of pushing. We live an hour from the hospital so I’m nervous about going into labor on my own and maybe not realizing it’s labor and then not making it. Last time DS was sunny side up so it was really intense back labor.
Married: October, 19, 2015
EDD 2/22/17
EDD 3/8/20
EDD 11/24/23
(Formerly Marriedhamstermom Feb ‘17)
@treetop19 I think DS is confused too. He started saying I’m his mommy brother 🤦🏻♀️ So we’re trying to get him to understand his brother is in my belly but a different person lol.
@kantobean I’ve always thought sprinkles were more like a celebration of the baby so gifts are smaller like diapers, bibs, onesies, little things. Personally I’d register but not share the link just use it for the completion discount. That’s what I’m planning on doing though I doubt I’ll have a sprinkle.
Married: October, 19, 2015
EDD 2/22/17
EDD 3/8/20
EDD 11/24/23
(Formerly Marriedhamstermom Feb ‘17)
I suppose you could do a sprinkle for the same sex and either ask everyone to chip in for one big item you need, or do no big gifts and just a diaper or formula raffle or everyone bring a book, or something like that. Either way, if people want to celebrate you and this baby, sounds great to me!
17 weeks
How old is/are your other kid(s)?
Girls 2 and 4
How is/are your kiddo(s) doing?
They’re in a great routine, going to school opposite days, so they’re busy in their own way, but when we talk about Baby Brother they are very excited.
What are you looking forward regarding adding to your family?
I’m looking forward to completing our family. I’m so excited to have a newborn and a bigger family but I’m really over being pregnant (already, I know!)
What concerns do you have regarding adding to your family?
I’ll always be concerned about getting each child enough of their own time, own hobbies, etc. but we’ve done pretty well so far so I just hope we can keep it up as they get older and there are 3 of them.
Im also concerned about having enough time and energy for my husband. This pregnancy has been hard on our marriage so far and I don’t want him to feel left behind.
Are you planning do to anything different for this birth, or are you wanting a similar experience to previous birth(s)?
I am birthing with a midwife in the hospital so I am hoping to have more personal care and to labor longer at home and/or longer in the hospital before meds. I also realized on the second night last time that it was easier to have my husband go home and be with our older child overnight and keep up her routine, so I plan to have him spend whatever nights I’m in the hospital at home with the girls. He misses out on a little newborn time, but the nurses help with the baby, and he and the older siblings will be better rested and less out of sorts when we come home.
Married: October, 19, 2015
EDD 2/22/17
EDD 3/8/20
EDD 11/24/23
(Formerly Marriedhamstermom Feb ‘17)
How old is/are your other kid(s)? 6.5
How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? He is getting back into the routine of school, starting a lot of fun activities like cub scouts and soccer. He is so interested in the baby and the biology behind it and is constantly asking if I have drank enough water. He is very big on the "baby rules" he hears and is insistent on no cold cuts.
What are you looking forward regarding adding to your family? We always planned on having 2 kids 4 years apart but time got away from us and here we are 6.5 years later. I am so excited for the baby stage and to watch my son take on such a nurturing role. He is at the age where he will be a huge help but I do not think jealousy will be a thing. I am really excited to see the differences in the two kids!
What concerns do you have regarding adding to your family? Oh boy- I feel like I have forgotten everything about the baby stage. EVERYTHING is different, the "rules", the "products" I feel like this is my first time being pregnant. I am a little worried about juggling a full schedule with my first along with a newborn. DH also switched jobs and is now a state trooper, his schedule is constantly changing and is so crazy which is also a concern.
Are you planning do to anything different for this birth, or are you wanting a similar experience to previous birth(s)? My first was unmedicated in a birthing facility at our local hospital, for a 24 labor it was pretty amazing! This time I had hoped to do a doula and homebirth but we live way out in the country and it was not in the cards for us (there is literally no one in a 2 hour radius!). I was very happy with my experience the first time and am okay with having a similar experience.
It also was a total learning curve having a newborn again after so long. Just like you said about all the rules and products and stuff changing. It’s crazy. Even things like car seats are SO different! And what I remembered working for DD didn’t work for DS and I was just a mess. Lol. She’s even more excited for this baby though because she will be 10 and is definitely more into the baby stage. Haha. She says toddlers are annoying. 😂
How old is/are your other kid(s)? 3.5
How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? Really good but having some potty training regression. Otherwise, a delight. I just wish I could spend more time with her.
What are you looking forward regarding adding to your family? another tiny baby. I was looking at old photos of DD and getting really emotional! I can’t believe she was so little.
What concerns do you have regarding adding to your family? Time. Work has been nuts for both me and H lately and I feel like we’re neglecting DD. I’m worried about adding another child and splitting our most limited resource: time/attention.
Are you planning do to anything different for this birth, or are you wanting a similar experience to previous birth(s)? Not sure yet? Went pretty well last time so I guess I’ll stick with it.
@mrsvp614 sooo sweet abt the belly kisses.
EDD/Weeks + Days: 3/18, 16w
How old is/are your other kid(s)? 17 mo
How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? Tantrums. So many tantrums.
What are you looking forward regarding adding to your family? Giving DS a playmate
What concerns do you have regarding adding to your family? My exhaustion and grumpiness. I’m already losing my patience more than I’d like.
Are you planning do to anything different for this birth, or are you wanting a similar experience to previous birth(s)? I had a backup OB from another practice bc my doctor was on vaca. I loved the backup OB. I stuck w my doctor this time bc he is the best surgeon in the area if I do need an emergency cesarean, but I kinda hope I get the random backup OB again (if all goes smoothly again).
Married: 8/22/15
BFP #1: 8/22/17 | DS: 4/20/18
BFP #2: 7/14/19 | EDD: 3/18/20
How old is/are your other kid(s)? Daughter is 2.5
How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? Adjusting still to the new schedule since we’ve started preschool and bringing home all the colds in the world.
What are you looking forward regarding adding to your family? Holidays and the kids playing together one day.
What concerns do you have regarding adding to your family? My time management skills and lack of patience causing problems for us all.
Are you planning do to anything different for this birth, or are you wanting a similar experience to previous birth(s)? As similar as possible. I have anxiety, so I’m hoping to be induced again. Everything went great last time and I don’t think she’ll say no since she’s the one who suggested it.
@varimama My DS was technically full-term too, so I didn't expect a NICU stay at all. My eyes are definitely open this time that anything can happen!
@varimama @momoftoddlers @miss.sally I like the idea of having DH home with DS this time around. I'm sure my parents or ILs would be able to stay with him, but he'd be happier and more productive at home.
Married: 10.15.16
DS BD: 8.20.17
TTC #2 1.1.19
BFP #2 7.3.19
EDD #2 3.13.20
@hmama716 @miss.sally, the age gap between kiddos is definitely interesting (there is a 10 year gap between my DD and DS) ..... I second @miss.sally, I wasn't expecting the older sibling jealousy, but it happened for us. DD is still jealous of DS, actually. I guess, she got used to being doted on/being the only, and she was most disappointed that I didn't have the time for her like I used to... so lately I have tried to make it a point to spend more time with her. But, one bonus to the age gap, she is old enough now (at 13) to babysit DS for a few hours at a time so DH and I can get out on a date night, and she helps out with him quite a bit when she is home during the summer. I definitely agree that having a newborn again was crazy, and things were completely different the 2nd time around.. I remember DD's pediatricians saying absolutely no peanut butter before age 2, then suddenly when DS came along it was ok? even the medical 'rules' seemed to have changed. it was definitely akin to being a FTM all over again.
Married: 10.15.16
DS BD: 8.20.17
TTC #2 1.1.19
BFP #2 7.3.19
EDD #2 3.13.20
How old is/are your other kid(s)? 18 months tomorrow!
How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? Good! He's been teething for months, but it doesn't seem to bother him TOO much *knock on wood*. I think he's on the verge of a language burst, and his personality is getting more and more fun
What are you looking forward regarding adding to your family? Just excited to meet my daughter and get to know her. Also excited to see DS as a big brother.
What concerns do you have regarding adding to your family? Still everything. DS has shown us that he's definitely not a fan of us holding other babies/kids. And I still have zero idea how I'll get myself and two kids ready in the morning. Or put two kids to bed at night if DH is gone.
Are you planning do to anything different for this birth, or are you wanting a similar experience to previous birth(s)? I had HORRIBLE back labor last time, so I may see if my hospital will do subcutaneous water injections. I'm guessing that it's not something they do, but it doesn't hurt to ask. I might try a few different positions before getting the epidural, but if labor & delivery went the same as last time I'd be perfectly happy.
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@mrsvp614 I'm glad you changed OBs and hospitals, and I hope it goes a long way to improve your birth experience!
@treetop19 ugh, I wish counter-pressure had worked consistently for me during labor. One minute it helped, the other minute it made things 10x worse.
@kantobean no talk of a shower or sprinkle yet. Although, in this area, it doesn't seem uncommon to have a shower for each pregnancy... which is weird to me. I'm fine if people want to buy me diapers or whatever, but I'll be weirded out if they want to have a party.
@varimama hey, I say your son is just highly intelligent with a mind of his own
@momoftoddlers sending DH home to take care of the existing kid(s) is a great idea that I hadn't thought of. It'll put my mind at ease if I know he's home with DS, and, provided the birth isn't too traumatic and I'm physically able, I think I'll be able to handle the newborn on my own with the nurses. Or maybe I'm delusional LOL
@silverhope love the honesty. DS also go through phases a few days at a time where he's prone to tantrums, and then the next week he's much more "reasonable". So I hope an easier week is just around the corner for you! And I also worry about my lack of patience... all the time. Especially when more sleep deprivation is thrown into the mix.
*Formerly LuND*
Me: 35 | DH: 37
TTC: 7/2016
Low AMH, mild MFI
BFP 7/29/17
EDD: 4/5/18
BFP #2 7/2/19
EDD 3/13/20
EDD/Weeks + Days: 3/27, 14w6d
How old is/are your other kid(s)? 3
How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? Good! He's so funny, and very sweet. He loves talking about his baby brother and how the baby is growing but he's still bigger than him
What are you looking forward regarding adding to your family? I always knew I did not want to raise an only child, so I'm happy to finally hit the bare minimum requirement for that lol. I want a third but DH is unconvinced still. DS is a super sweet kid and I can't wait to see how he acts with the baby, especially because the "baby" at his babysitter's will be 2 this month and he thinks that's what real babies look like. So I'm pretty sure he's going to be shocked when the baby is born and he is much smaller.
What concerns do you have regarding adding to your family? I feel really stretched thin most days as it is. Just worried about juggling two, and like others, worried about DS feeling neglected because the baby will need lots of attention and he won't have all my time and cuddles anymore.
Are you planning do to anything different for this birth, or are you wanting a similar experience to previous birth(s)? We planned a home birth with a midwife last time, and then when I realized I was in labor, it was way too late and my midwife was an hour away but the baby was coming right then. So we got an ambulance to the hospital 5 mins from my house and he was crowning before we even got there. It was truly a horrible experience and the staff at this hospital happened to be notorious for treating home birth transfers poorly, but it was the closest one and we had no choice. We will be doing a home birth again this time, just hopefully this time with the birth included and not just the prenatal care. Thankfully my midwife is only 15 minutes away this go around. And we now live just as close to a different hospital that is much better if a transfer is necessary.
EDD/Weeks + Days: March 12, 17 weeks and 1 day!
How old is/are your other kid(s)? DD turned 4 last week and DS is 21 months!
How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? DS is just fine, and DD is sort of in a bad spell, but I know it will past. She’s acting very spoiled, defiant, and less fun to be around. DH travels for work, but he will be HOME this week for once, so hoping that and Halloween coming can help get her back on track. I’m reading a great book called Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline.
What are you looking forward regarding adding to your family? So many things. Looking forward to completing our family, seeing DS as a big brother, matching outfits, holidays, vacations, 12 weeks of maternity leave where I get to be with ALL of my children. All of it!
What concerns do you have regarding adding to your family? Like others, my patience level!
Are you planning do to anything different for this birth, or are you wanting a similar experience to previous birth(s)? This is a great question! Same OB practice, same hospital. But I want to be CALMER this time. I was SO dramatic with DS (awful back labor like others) and lost perspective. I’d like to make it longer without the epidural and I’d like the epidural to be weaker. I could not feel AT ALL with both babies and had no clue how to push… both ended up needing forceps for different reasons, but I would like to see if I could be a more effective pusher if I could FEEL something (but not everything lol lol).
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@MrsVP614 This is my third, and I still feel you 100% on the worries about losing moments with my two kiddos now. There’s no gentle way of putting it: adding a new child is a HUGE change.
@treetop19 That is so great and adorable about the sleepover!
@momoftoddlers I so agree re: looking forward to completing the family. I worried I was going to be very emotional that this would be my last pregnancy/birth, but I feel READY to focus all my energy on PARENTING and knowing who all our family will include!
@kantobean +1 times a million on wishing I had more time with my kids. I hate that I get time rushed before work and exhausted after.
@silverhope Ugh I hate when I lose my patience, but I get it… 17 months is HARD.
@aerie_star I worry a lot about my lack of patience too—or it getting worse when I add a baby. I really am thinking about starting weekly meditation NOW, because that—along with running—seem to help me stay calm and patient! Do you have any tricks like that?
@stassischroeder SNOW??!?!?!!?! It was in the 90s here yesterday hahaha.
@hellobabys I am with you 100% on DH being there. I might suggest he go home to get a real shower and have a meal with the kids to relieve my parents and maybe go workout, but that would all take 3 hours max, and I’d expect him back! Also, I had to talk my DH into a third! If there is a will, there is a way! Your birth story is seriously so wild and insane. I can’t believe it was that fast! I’m so sorry it was awful for you. I hate when hospitals are dicks to transfers. Like WHY?
DD1 EDD 9/29/2015, Born 9/24/2015
DS1 EDD 1/3/2018, Born 12/26/2017
BFP #3 3/21/2019, EDD 11/29/2019, MMC/D&C 5/7/2019
BFP #4 6/28/2019, EDD 3/12/2020
How old is/are your other kid(s)? 3
How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? DD had a rough start to the school year. We are working on her behavior with a positive incentives chart. She is very bright and articulate but struggles with cleaning up and sharing.
What are you looking forward regarding adding to your family? seeing DD with her baby brother, it’s pretty much all she talks about.
What concerns do you have regarding adding to your family? taking care of both kids, especially after my cs.
Are you planning do to anything different for this birth, or are you wanting a similar experience to previous birth(s)? I had a failed induction with DD that ended in an emergency cs. The actual procedure went fine and then DD was able to stay with me the whole time. I just had a hard time with recovery bc I wasn’t expecting it. I also labored for 18 hours (only dilated to a 4) before they decided to call it. This time I’m having a scheduled cs and I know what to expect so I’m looking forward to that. Not looking forward to caring for my 40 lb toddler post surgery but I know many moms do it so it can be done.
How old is/are your other kid(s)? 4 next month, and 2 in January
How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? We are in a good stage, DS had Hand/Foot/Mouth disease a couple weeks ago, so after dodging that with DD, I can now mark that off my list of experiences. So, so glad it did not spread to the rest of us to the same degree.
What are you looking forward regarding adding to your family? When the three kids are older and their personalities really develop and seeing them interact!!
What concerns do you have regarding adding to your family? How long it takes to get to that point!! DS is almost 2 but waiting for him to start talking so he can communicate with DD is making time slow down. Not that once they can communicate it will always go well I guess!!
Are you planning do to anything different for this birth, or are you wanting a similar experience to previous birth(s)? If this birth can go exactly like my planned c-section delivery and recovery wise with DS, that would be great. DD was not so great, forceps here too @EmilyLove25 and also the big baby in NICU @varimama and @mrsvp614 (10lb 2oz in for one week for meconium and bottomed out blood sugar). And then my stitches blew after two weeks, so all of those things would be nice to avoid this time around!!
@mrsvp614 Glad potty training is going smoothly, hope he's all set for daytime by the time the baby comes!!
@treetop19 so cute that he wants a tree, perfect excuse for you to get one up as soon as you want!!
@kantobean logically I know I should not to do anything for this baby being the third, but I also feel guilty she doesn't get her own party. Like I don't want any gifts, just the celebration (to fill that section on the baby book I'll never get around to completing) and yes to the cake!! We did a sip and see for DS, but it felt a little forced as there was supposed to be a shower but this was more of an afterthought feeling.
@varimama My two amaze me at how well they can tune out the others' tantrums. One screaming is almost a deterrent for the other one and they are good at sorting themselves out if one is being more needy...most of the time.
@momoftoddlers My DH will def be 'enjoying' every hospital moment with me, muahahaha. Actually it was a nice break for us from our toddler and a second to enjoy the new baby and looking forward to soaking up that moment again.
@miss.sally sorry about your NICU stress, I did the same thing with putting a lot of stress on myself to make it down to her every three hours to nurse, even though she was being NG fed anyway because of her infection.
@stassischroeder My DD also worried me for a bit with her 'preferences', not sure if this is what you mean, but like for example FREAKING out if a sock is folded down in a weird way inside her pants. Kind of stuff that made me say uhhhhh, like I know toddlers can be picky about their toast being cut a certain way etc. which she does express opinions on things like that too, but it was the more sentient things that worried me for a bit. Not anymore, because it seems selective and she's very carefree on many things. Wondering if (this is me making stuff up again) it's a first born thing, because they're so used to us being able to make everything close to perfect for them. Cuz my DS is waaaaayy more laid back haha.
@EmilyLove25 That book sounds like something I need to read, I feel like my DD has been like that since 15 months, eek, she's strong willed to a T.
The thing is, 98% of the time, it'll just be me and the kids, or the four of us, so I think it's silly to put our kid all the way in the back for the occasional times someone else (grandparents) are riding with us. I'm also thinking that the infant seat will be easier to get around for the first while.
So what do you all do?
Married: 10.15.16
DS BD: 8.20.17
TTC #2 1.1.19
BFP #2 7.3.19
EDD #2 3.13.20
Married: October, 19, 2015
EDD 2/22/17
EDD 3/8/20
EDD 11/24/23
(Formerly Marriedhamstermom Feb ‘17)
I'm going to do more research to see what's recommended so I can have more proof for my argument with DH. Ha!
Married: 10.15.16
DS BD: 8.20.17
TTC #2 1.1.19
BFP #2 7.3.19
EDD #2 3.13.20
Married: 8/22/15
BFP #1: 8/22/17 | DS: 4/20/18
BFP #2: 7/14/19 | EDD: 3/18/20
I never got a cervix check until I was in labor at the hospital since DS came early so no clue if I was dilated early. But I def didn’t have what you did. I have no clue what was going on with me and car rides.
Married: 8/22/15
BFP #1: 8/22/17 | DS: 4/20/18
BFP #2: 7/14/19 | EDD: 3/18/20