Groups 3 & 4 Check-In (EDD July 17-31): Week of May 27 — The Bump
July 2019 Moms

Groups 3 & 4 Check-In (EDD July 17-31): Week of May 27

Est Due Date / Weeks + Days:


Baby is the size of a(n): 


Team:


Upcoming Appointments: 


How are you feeling?: 



Rants/Raves:  



Questions: 



GTKY:  Did you have any summer traditions growing up as a kid? Any that you want to continue or new ones you want to start with baby? (stole from group 2)


Re: Groups 3 & 4 Check-In (EDD July 17-31): Week of May 27

  • jennm0724jennm0724
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    Est Due Date / Weeks + Days: July 24, 31wk6d


    Baby is the size of a(n): coconut


    Team: Pink


    Upcoming Appointments: Regular OB tomorrow..not wanting to get on the scale..


    How are you feeling?: Heavy, trying to roll over or get out of bed seems so much harder. I also caught a cold last week at my baby shower and am still dealing with that. How does one person make so much mucus!?



    Rants: I posted it in the inappropriate comments thread, but the lady who worked at home depot didn't seem to believe me when I told her I was having a girl, apparently it looks like I'm carrying a boy?? And then proceeds to tell me I look like I am going to pop when I tell her I have 8 more weeks... oh and I tried to put on a pair of boots to wear to dinner this weekend, I couldn't even get my foot in the boot!! My poor feet are swelling/growing..

    Raves:  It was our 1st wedding anniversary on Sunday. The bakery who did our wedding cake provides you a complementary anniversary cake so that you don't have to eat freezer cake. It was sooo yummy! Then we went out for dinner. Was a really nice weekend. Also started painting the babies room. Once it's all together I'll post it in the nursery thread. The color scares me a bit but I'm hoping once the crib and stuff is in there it will soften it...

    Questions: Who has packed their hospital bag? I realize as we are about 8-9 weeks away I should probably get mine going..


    GTKY:  Did you have any summer traditions growing up as a kid? Any that you want to continue or new ones you want to start with baby? Every summer as a kid we would go on a camping trip to a lake, we would spend a week there. It was so much fun, so many great memories. My husband would go camping every year during the summer for a week, since we've been together I've joined them on this trip. We will continue this trip with our daughter as so many of our family members go and bring their kids, it will be a great trip for her to hang out with all her cousins for a week.






    Cbeanzcanuckmommafromcatstokids
  • mamanbebemamanbebe
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    Est Due Date / Weeks + Days: 7/19 32w+3d

    Baby is the size of a(n): A squash or a fresh coconut

    Team: Green

    Upcoming Appointments: Midwives in a week, hopefully a new MFM in two weeks

    How are you feeling?: Physically, I feel pretty good. My diet seems to be under control and my estimated hb1ac just dropped again in the app I'm using, which makes me feel pretty confident. Mentally, I'm trying to get out of a funk that dealing with after the last MFM appt. 

    Rants/Raves: Rant/ I slept terribly last night. I was freezing and having restless leg when I got into bed. Then when I was finally ready to go to sleep, I was still freezing to the touch but was having hot flashes and sweating. I had to get out of bed and go sleep in the living room where it was cooler. Then when I finally went back to bed, DS woke up motn from being scared. Mom life? Rave/ I'm glad it's a short week. I don't have much on my schedule, so I'm hoping I can start working on one of the patterns I bought to try out my new sewing machine. 

    Questions: Anyone else having body temp regulation issues at night? I remember night sweats being a thing last time, but not being freezing at the same time. 

    GTKY:  Did you have any summer traditions growing up as a kid? Any that you want to continue or new ones you want to start with baby? (stole from group 2) Camping! We had a camper last year and used it pretty regularly, but the particular one we had was a PITA so we sold it in the winter. I would love to get another camper so that we can get out and start exploring the NW again. My sister wants us all to meet up at Yellowstone next summer, so that's my mental goal right now. 

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  • mamanbebemamanbebe
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    @jennm0724 Happy anniversary! Mmmmm cake :) I haven't packed a bag yet, I don't know if I will ahead of time since the things I would bring I use every day, but just thinking about that, I might slip a packing list into my overnight bag so that I at least can gather things quickly if I have to go to the hospital instead of homebirth. 
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  • CbeanzCbeanz
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    Est Due Date / Weeks + Days: 7/18


    Baby is the size of a(n): Some kind of squash


    Team: Green


    Upcoming Appointments: Biweekly appts, still just routine checkups. Biophysical profiles start at 36 weeks.


    How are you feeling?: Literally did not sleep last night.  Combination of anxiety, violent kicks, and likely hot flashes.  The AC was on and I was uncovered but I was unbearably hot.



    Rants/Raves:  I am just done with this whole thing, ladies. I can't believe I have 7 weeks to go - I don't think I'm going to make it. The 4th time around it's really taking a toll on me, physically, but more so my anxiety level.  I just have too many things in the air - between kids, work, summer childcare, night classes, and all the shit it takes to run a household. Chickens, lol. It's just too much.  Once I'm on maternity leave at least I won't have the work/commute but I will have another human depending on me. It's overwhelming.



    Questions: 



    GTKY:  Did you have any summer traditions growing up as a kid? Any that you want to continue or new ones you want to start with baby? (stole from group 2) 

    Yeah - we had lots of summer fun as kids. Spent a lot of time at the pool, and I just got a family membership at our city pool this summer and we basically spent the weekend there. The kids LOVED it - way more than I expected. So I imagine we'll be there a lot once I start maternity leave. We also took beach trips every summer as kids, but hubs is NOT a beach person so we won't do that too often. He's more of a lake fishing kind of person, which I could see us getting into.
    canuckmomma
  • Est Due Date / Weeks + Days: DD July 17 - 32W6D


    Baby is the size of a(n): Armadillo


    Team: Green


    Upcoming Appointments: June 7th physio and OB check up


    How are you feeling?: Tired today. Been getting up to pee lots. And my toddler has been crying around 2-4AM lately. Swelling as well but manageable so far.



    Rants/Raves:  Rave-I have less than 4 more weeks of work. Rant- I am SO done with coming into work. Also a rave we put shelves up for the baby room last weekend so the room itself is pretty much done.



    GTKY:  Did you have any summer traditions growing up as a kid? Any that you want to continue or new ones you want to start with baby? (stole from group 2) ... Every summer during the first week of July we would road trip as a family down to the states, as far as Minneapolis or Chicago. Usually go to a theme park, water park, shopping and museums. We are Canadian so we loved finding somewhere to celebrate 4th of July with our southern neighbors and watch fireworks. My husband spent his summers at the lake either camping or in a RV/trailer with his family. I am NOT an avid camper but am slowly learning and warming up to it since being married to him now for 7 years.

  • CbeanzCbeanz
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    @jennm0724 ;Happy anniversary!  I love that idea about providing a cake so you're not eating freezer burned cake!  Was your first year of marriage as hard as everyone says it will be?  Personally I think marriage starts out great and just keeps getting better. :)
    fromcatstokids
  • mamanbebemamanbebe
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    @Cbeanz I think we had the same night of sleep last night. I'm sorry you are dealing with so much riding on your shoulders though, I had a really dark day on Saturday when DH was gone mushroom foraging for like 10 hours and I scared the crap out of my son with a serious ugly cry because he won't sit at the table and eat. When does your maternity leave start? 
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  • jennm0724jennm0724
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    @mamanbebe Thanks! The cake was so good, made this pregnant girl real happy!
    I had temp regulation problems before getting KO lol. I tend to get super hot as soon as I get in bed, then in the middle of the night I wake up drenched in sweat. We sleep with the window open and a fan, still doesn't help.
    I agree on the bag, maybe that's why I haven't packed..The things I think I might need in there I use all the time. I will try to put some diapers and things in there for the baby since I'm not using that LOL!

    @Cbeanz You've got a full plate!! I can't imagine the demand on your time. Hang in there!! Thanks! Our first year was so easy. I remember when we first got married people asked how married life was, my response was always "no different" and people looked at me funny. We had been together for 4 years before getting married, we lived together for 3 of those years and had purchased a home. Nothing changed other than my last name and I think that's best! Life with him is pretty easy :)

    @canuckmomma hopefully the 4 weeks of work fly by for you! I'm working up until my due date but won't be going into the office in July. My commute is hell so I try to work from home whenever I can. I prefer the commute from my bed to my desk.... 5 steps LOL!


    mamanbebeCbeanzcanuckmomma
  • mamanbebemamanbebe
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    @canuckmomma Your maternity leave is coming up fast, that's exciting! I hope you find better sleep soon, it's hard having littles wake up in the middle of the night when you are already struggling. 
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  • hestia14hestia14
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    edited May 28
    I'll tag in my next post!

    Est Due Date / Weeks + Days: July 18 / 32W5D


    Baby is the size of a(n): wine bottle


    Team: pink


    Upcoming Appointments: check-up 6/3, third tri ultrasound 6/4. (And a pedicure tomorrow!)


    How are you feeling?: huge. Getting up in the middle of the night half-asleep with a full bladder and a watermelon bump is really rough. My foot swelling finally went away after three days, but my feet grew a size! I tried on all my shoes this morning and had no choice but to wear my dress sandals that don't go with my outfit, and even in those my feet are falling off the edge. Good thing Amazon Prime delivers next day if you order first thing in the morning!


    Rants/Raves: 

    Rant: Do I have a few sips of water and haul my giant self out of bed in the middle of the night to pee then stay awake for an hour, or do I parch myself before bed and take forever to fall asleep because I don't want to get up in the middle of the night? :/ 

    Rave: DH and I did a ton of work this weekend organizing the baby's room and putting in our garden. We planted a few vegetables and put in flowers underneath the nursery window--Larkspur for the July birth flower, and red gerbera daisies because July's birthstone is ruby. And because they're cute :) 


    Questions: *edit* I remembered now! Is anyone else coughing up a lot of mucus? I know pregnancy sinus issues are a thing, but mine's all in my throat :/


    GTKY: Did you have any summer traditions growing up as a kid? Any that you want to continue or new ones you want to start with baby? (stole from group 2) Not any formal traditions--we went to the beach quite a bit, but since it was on the other side of town, it wasn't a big occasion. We actually have quite a few beaches in Cleveland, but I don't live super close to any right now. Maybe DH and can make it a point to take baby there! I'm sure my beach-loving mom would love to join :) 

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    canuckmomma
  • mamanbebemamanbebe
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    @hestia14 Your LO's window garden sounds so sweet :) 
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  • hestia14hestia14
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    @jennm0724 That's really nice for your bakery to make you an anniversary cake! So many wedding cakes get freezer burnt or tough after a year. I haven't started my hospital bag, but I probably will next week. 
    @mamanbebe I've never heard of feeling hot on the inside but being cold to the touch :flushed: I hope that doesn't keep happening to you--sounds rough. 
    @CBeanz You can do it! It's definitely a lot going on, but I'm sure you can handle it. :)
    @canuckmomma I have just over five weeks left of work and I'm more stressed than anything. My replacement starts in mid-June and I have just over two weeks to train her--and she's a fresh college grad. I'm doing the best I can to prepare everything so it's as smooth of a transition as possible, but I feel like we're going to throw her to the wolves :neutral: 
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  • @jennm0724 I have been thinking about my hospital bag, but haven't packed it yet. I'm hoping to be a minimalist and just have a small duffel.  

    @mamanbebe I seem to be trending hotter for sure lately, but don't have the cold to the touch component. 

    @Cbeanz I'm so sorry to hear your anxiety level has increased.  I can't imagine all the things you are doing, i can barely do my job and keep the household running without any kids.  Does it help to share with your partner? (for me it's more helpful to vent to a friend than MH in these situations) Hopefully you can at least share your thoughts to maybe relieve some anxiety?

    @canuckmomma all you STM(+) are amazing. I am so tired and i don't have any LOs to take care of.  I hope you get a better night's rest tonight.

    @hestia14 oh my goodness! i hope your feet go back to your previous size at some point, i am glad to hear the swelling went down.

    Est Due Date / Weeks + Days: July 18th // 32+5

    Baby is the size of a(n): (stolen from @hestia14 ) Wine Bottle

    Team: Green!

    Upcoming Appointments: OB & growth scan i think on Thursday (I am also not looking forward to stepping on the scale--i definitely have been going through a sweets phase that i can't (won't) stop...)

    How are you feeling?: Ok, i'm tired and don't sleep well. Food in general doesn't sound good, so i'm trying to make sure i get all my nutrients for my baby.  otherwise i'd be eating a bagel for every meal if i wasn't worried about the baby.  smoothies are helping too with adding leafy greens in them as well.  

    Rants/Raves:  Nursery is almost done.  We did a large amazon completion discount order yesterday with some of our final needs. so i'm excited for all of that to come in! We also did a diaper run at target yesterday because they had a promotion to spend $100 on baby items and get $20 giftcard.    I have zero idea how many diapers we will need so we got a few NB just in case, lots of size 1 and then large size 2 (we were gifted 100 size 1 previously) 

    GTKY: we would drive 30 hours to Grandma's house for 3 weeks every summer. It was a great time and loved spending time on the lake swimming.  

    canuckmomma
  • Est Due Date / Weeks + Days: 31w 3d 7/27

    Baby is the size of a(n): asparagus

    Team: blue

    Upcoming Appointments: growth ultrasound and check in 6/6

    How are you feeling?: I have a double ear infection which stinks and is more painful than I've ever had an ear infection. Baby has also been kicking my diaphragm all weekend so the shortness of breath is all too real.

    Rants/Raves: Rave: I was able to do a lot of relaxing this weekend which was nice. Rant: we went to a wedding Saturday and they had donuts, I told H that I was going to go to restroom and then get donuts for dessert, and they were practically gone! I was so sad haha.

    Questions: Has anyone ever been told they have a heart murmur? I had to go the to minute clinic for the ear infection and the NP told me I have a murmur and that I need to get it checked out and I asked her if it was common in pregnancy and she said no. I then googled it and it said that 90% of pregnant women get it so I was just confused.

    GTKY:  Did you have any summer traditions growing up as a kid? Any that you want to continue or new ones you want to start with baby? (stole from group 2) Just spending lots of time outdoors really. We always went a local amusement park for their Halloween weekends in the fall so that was more of a tradition than anything for summer.

  • CbeanzCbeanz
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    @mamanbebe ; Mushroom foraging??!! Did he get anything good?  Sorry you're having tough times at meals. My kids don't want to sit at the table or eat either. Dinner is hell at our house.
    I think I will start maternity leave around July 4.  Just planning that date bc I know I won't want to go back to work after the 4-day weekend. I could barely drag myself back after this past weekend... And, my 2nd and 3rd babies arrived a few weeks early so I would like to have a few days off getting rested/organized before I go into labor with this one.

    What are you planning to sew?  Maybe I should check the Crafty Mamas thread...
  • Est Due Date / Weeks + Days: July 29th/31 + 1


    Baby is the size of a(n): asparagus 


    Team: blue


    Upcoming Appointments: 32 week scan next Monday and OB Tuesday


    How are you feeling?: Still struggling with the emotional part...so frustrating!! Physically good still although have random hip pain right now from possibly overdoing my workout :(



    Rants/Raves:  Rave is I had time to go for a swim at lunch. Rant is I now have hip pain which I think was from breast stroke....normally my recovery laps! Hope it goes away by morning....



    Questions: Not right now....



    GTKY:  Did you have any summer traditions growing up as a kid? Any that you want to continue or new ones you want to start with baby? (stole from group 2)  I struggle a bit with this because my summers were all hanging at the pool, cookouts, badminton and croquet in the yard...my poor children are city kids so their summers will definitely not be the same!! Definitely something I’ll have to think about....and when they are old enough send them on a plane to grandma and grandpa :)

  • @mamanbebe how was your GTT?

    @jennm0724 definitely didn’t pack yet....going to 42 weeks last time really changed my outlook - it was so much harder to see the bag packed for weeks and weeks haha!! 

    Feeling bad for all of the US moms working until the end....I have more or less decided to be done end of next week (the normal day to be done would have been June 24th but you can have 14 extra “free” days before....I didn’t take them with DD but I think that was silly). I love my work but it has been so stressful and I had two trips last week that nearly killed me from an exhaustion perspective! 
  • mamanbebemamanbebe
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    @frenchbaby18 My fasting number was fine but I failed each draw. I'm kind of bummed at the outcome, given having to spend half a day with no positive outcome and it really screwed with my levels for a day or two. But I'm glad I understand the full scope now and I am taking things more seriously. 

    I hope your hip pain resolves! 

    @Cbeanz I can't for the life of me recall being as terrible at the table as my son is, but I am sure my parents would have a different story haha.

    DH went on a Porcini forage but I suspect he pointed any out to other people in the group because he only came home with a handful of Morels :) 

    That will be nice to be done with work after the 4th, I hope you find all the time to you need relax and get your house prepared for the arrival of #4!

    For sewing, I picked up a few projects for myself, I think a loose linen dress & top were the two easy ones and then I bought things for a somewhat complicated quilted jacket that I'd like to have done for fall. 

    @samanthak46 That's so sad about the disappearing donuts! I hope your prenatal provider can enlighten you about the murmur and set your mind at ease. It sounds like something that wouldn't be super abnormal during pregnancy, given all the wacky things going on with our bodies. 

    @blackhottamales I hope your OB appt goes well! On diapers, if you end up needing more newborn you can always take extras home with you from the hospital. I remember being encouraged to take all the diapering supplies with us, in addition to the luxurious mesh panties :D 
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  • @mamanbebe sorry to hear that your numbers weren’t good but it’s wonderful that you are controlling the fasting number so well! You should feel proud of that!!!

    My hip is fine this morning, low grade pain killer and heat before bed and now feel normal. I probably pushed myself too much with the lane I chose and should have stuck in the slower lane to force my pace! Hard to accept slowing down ;)
    mamanbebe
  • Est Due Date / Weeks + Days: July 21 | 32w4d

    Baby is the size of a(n): squash

    Team: Blue

    Upcoming Appointments: June 4 - midwife

    How are you feeling?: good! feeling a lot more BH contractions these days, supposedly it's more common after 32 weeks. but overall, everything feels great. 

    Rants/Raves:  
    Rave: baby's room is painted, crib has been bought (just needs to be assembled). things are coming along. :) gifts have been rolling in from our registries, which is always fun to come home to boxes to open :) shower is in a couple weeks, and i can't wait to see what my girls have planned. <3

    Questions: 

    GTKY:  Did you have any summer traditions growing up as a kid? Any that you want to continue or new ones you want to start with baby? (stole from group 2)
    No real summer specific traditions growing up as a kid for me. but we've started a couple with DD; usually we take an end of summer trip before it's back to school. we also try to go visit our friends for the weekend who live 3 hours away, they live in a big cottage country so the city it always buzzing in the summers. we like to stay in the city for the summers to enjoy the weather and all that goes on here, and do our travelling in the winter. 

    @jennm0724 happy first anniversary!! i haven't packed yet either, i figured i would do it closer to 36 weeks. :)


  • hakelehakele
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    Est Due Date / Weeks + Days: EDD July 17 - 32+6

    Baby is the size of a(n): loaf of bread

    Team: PINK! 

    Upcoming Appointments:  Cleaning lady is coming next Monday to prep for my parents coming. And then we have the baby care class that evening. 

    How are you feeling?: Very large and pregnant. Energy is still hanging in there. But dear lord, I am SO hungry ALL THE TIME. I know that my metabolism is ramping up for the final weeks. So I'm hot and hungry. 


    Rants/Raves:  OMG, so many raves! 
    1. The bathroom is DONE. 
    2. My family is coming out for a few more days than I originally thought. And my DAD is coming! Which I wasn't sure was going to happen, but I'm really happy that they will all get to see me pregnant. My mom, dad, and sister. It is going to be SO NICE to get to spend time with them. And of course to have my baby shower is going to be so fun. 
    3. My macaron class over the weekend was amazing. 
    4. The hail missed my house Monday night, thank you, mother nature! 


    Questions: 



    GTKY:  Did you have any summer traditions growing up as a kid? Any that you want to continue or new ones you want to start with baby? (stole from group 2) As a kid, we had lots of trips to Disneyland and Yellowstone, and I can't wait to share those places with her. We also used to go to the Sand Dunes every year for their sand castle contest weekend. That would be so fun to get to go again. I haven't been in years!  Also, assuming my parents stay living where they are, we will likely always visit them for the 4th of July every summer. 

    mamanbebefrenchbaby18Cbeanz
  • canuckmommacanuckmomma
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    edited May 29

    @jennm0724 I wish I could work from home! The commute into work is half the battle. Well and getting a toddler ready and out the door by 7 :s

    @hestia14 My work hasn't even found a replacement!! So whoever is coming will really be going in blind. I'm leaving a binder of notes but wish I could at least have a week with whoever is taking over my duties.

    @blackhottamales Oh yes!!! The Amazon completion discount is ready ... I need to double check what I need. I want to make it worth my while. Do you get the 15% discount off the whole order or just one completion discount item?

    @hakele Do you have a cleaning lady come regularly or just randomly? Since about 4 months pregnant ive had one come once every 4-6 weeks and it's been a life saver!! Keeping her for after too.


    **edited cuz the screen names weren't popping up and I kept typing them in wrong!!**

  • @canuckmomma you get 15% if you're a prime member (10% if not prime) on up to 2 orders of $2,000 or less.  Make sure to only add eligible items in the cart (MH had to remove some items we wanted that weren't eligible because it was messing things up).  I think our order was ~$500 so we got ~$75 off.  Then i think we'll do one more order right after LO is born.  

    @hakele yes--thank you for the reminder, i have to get the the cleaning company set up to start coming again!
    canuckmomma
  • hakelehakele
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    @canuckmomma We schedule her randomly right now, usually before the holidays and before my parents come to stay. But we are moving to every 6 weeks after this appointment. We are already going to have her set up to come about a week before my EDD. And then I'm sure we'll want her to come on a more regular basis after that, and that is our plan right now. 
  • @canuckmomma and @hakele +1 to cleaning services ...we are at every week at this point...it gets so addictive!!! There is definitely no going back, at least there wasn’t for us...I like to say it’s part of the budget to keep my marriage in tact :)
  • CbeanzCbeanz
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    @hakele you changed your avatar!
  • Est Due Date / Weeks + Days: July 18th 


    Baby is the size of a(n): Butternut squash


    Team:blue


    Upcoming Appointments: growth ultrasound this friday


    How are you feeling?: exhausted. I have a bit of a sore throat after raking leaves



    Rants/Raves:  Rave: Finally a home owner, been working on the house nonstop for the last two weeks, hoping to have upstairs painted this weekend so we can start moving some bedroom/baby stuff in. Once kitchen is finish id like to be fully moved in.



    Questions: none



    GTKY:  Did you have any summer traditions growing up as a kid? Any that you want to continue or new ones you want to start with baby? Mostly just going to the beach and swimming in the ocean, i live by the ocean. Family tradition is to go to the adirondacks in August for a week, but with little one coming towards the end of July, my family canceled their trip to be available to help me with new baby.

    Cbeanzfromcatstokids
  • Est Due Date / Weeks + Days: July 31 / 31 + 1


    Baby is the size of a(n): bunch of asparagus 


    Team: pink


    Upcoming Appointments: next Wednesday, regular ob. Tonight is natural birthing discussion. 


    How are you feeling?: Overwhelmed! 1. We bought a house, and have been moving in this week. Still one(?) more load to go. 2. Have to get the rental we left all spic and span by the end of Friday. 3. Found out on the 17th that my position has been eliminated. It ends on July 1st. More in my rant. 4. Baby shower is on Saturday and I insisted on taking care of the drinks since mom and MIL are doing so much for it. 5. We don't have a pediatrician yet. 6. I'm absolutely exhausted. I've tried to write this post multiple times this week, and am just now posting it on Thursday. Its 10:14 am, I slept for 10 hours last night and already had to take a nap.



    Rants/Raves:  

    So, my company eliminated my job, and it ends on July 1st. A new job was created that I can apply for, however they left us hanging on the details of the position for a full week, publishing the info last Friday. So far, it sounds like a lot of extra work (more pay, but is the extra stress/mental energy required worth it when I'm a ftm?). Have to decide if I'm going to apply for a new position or take 6 months of severance pay. If I take severance, it would be sooo nice to spend time with baby (I would be a stay at home mom if we could afford it), but I would be looking for a brand new job with a new company in January which seems like a terrible time to do it.

    Questions: What would you do?


    GTKY: My grandparents had a cabin on Lake Michigan that we (huge extended family) would visit every summer. So many great memories for spending time on the beach and with family. I'd love to do something similar with my family.  DH and I rented a cabin up there last year, and he loved it too.

    I can't remember who mentioned they liked the beach and H liked lake fishing, but if you are anywhere near Lake Michigan, check it out! It's a HUGE lake, so similar experience to the ocean (make sure to go mid to late summer, so its warm enough), plus it has lots of recreational fishers. I always stay near Au Gres or Tawas City.

  • mamanbebemamanbebe
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    @fromcatstokids I would probably be tempted to take the severance but from experience it's incredibly hard to get hired when you've taken time off between jobs as a new mom. I know it's illegal for them to take it into consideration, but I couldn't get hired and ended up going freelance. 

    Question: If you apply for the new job but don't get it would you still get severance? If you're not at risk for losing the severance, I'd consider applying for that job and if I got it, see how the position goes when I got back from mat leave. 
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    Cbeanz
  • jennm0724jennm0724
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    @fromcatstokids yikes!! You've got a lot going on!!! Hang in there! I'd be so stressed out. How long have you been at this company? That might factor into my decision of whether or not to apply for the new position. Being a FTM myself I assume we'd end up taking a lot of days off and that might not go so well if you start at a new company, where if you apply for this new position and get it, there might be more leniency with the time you need to take off. I'd apply for the job and see what happens.
    Cbeanz
  • @fromcatstokids wow. That's a lot to handle. I would definitely be tempted to take the 6 month severance as well.  I guess it depends what your job market looks like.  It think even if you take the 6 month severance, you don't have to take the whole 6 months and maybe you could find a job that you think would fit your needs as a FTM? I do also wonder if you apply for the job and let's say you were offered the job and decided not to take it would you still get the severance pay? that might help delay the final decision making process since you have so much going on right now.  
  • CbeanzCbeanz
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    @fromcatstokids wow, lots to think about. My job was eliminated during my maternity leave with my second (she was 10 weeks old). I was given a severance which was a nice buffer (beware that 40% will be taxes). But being a SAHM was not my goal. So the rest of my time "off" was applying for positions, scheduling phone interviews during naptimes, and needing sitters for on-site interviews. The job hunt really got in the way of bonding time with my baby. My only recommendation is to make the decision as early as you can - are you staying home or are you finding a job - so your maternity leave isn't cast with all that uncertainty. Best of luck!!
    blackhottamales
  • @fromcatstokids ... That sounds stressful about your job. What a tough place to be in. How can a company randomly dissolve a position? Seems harsh right before you have a child. I don't think that is legal to do in Canada. This happened to my girlfriend who worked for an American company, they dissolved her job after 4 months of mat leave and then told her she either could apply for new job or take severance. Just don't seem right to leave someone in limbo like that, especially during such a monumental time in your life!
  • leylea89leylea89
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    It with this App already! I’ve been trying to reply for 2 days but now it’s not letting me copy/paste. Oh well a I guess. I’m gonna manually do it :(.

    EDD: 7/25 32weeks
    Baby Size: Florida Pomelo
    Team: Blue

    Appointments:
    I actually freaked out over intense Braxton Hicks yesterday and went to the hospital so agar my 32w ultrasound a day early. He’s so beautiful 😍 and he has my mama’s chin! Luckily I’m fine and so is he but I have to be more aware of my physical limits at work.
    next appointment is at 34 weeks on the 14th. I think that’s when she starts checking my lady bits for dilation and effacement? I don’t know for sure.

    How are you feeling?:
    I’m emotional AF 😂. It’s the opposite of my usual self so it’s both frustrating and comical. I get mad at myself for crying but I can’t not cry. Other than that I feel pretty good.

    Rants/Raves: 
    Both a rant and a rave in one- my sister dropped the ball on my shower and at every turn has made me feel like I shouldn’t even do it because she stresses me out with it. luckily my mom told me about her failure to even really plan it yesterday and has helped me salvage it. Her excuse is she’s broke but I’ve Told her several times I would finance anything. I should’ve known when it started with my invitations. She told me the ones at the dollar store were ugly so I looked at Walmart and found ones I felt were cute and reasonably priced and even told her I could pay for them online and she just pick them up at her Wal-Mart to ship. The next day she grabs the dollar store ones and doesn’t even send them to my friends anyway. As a matter of fact, she didn’t even send them. She waited until a month later to hand them out at a funeral of a guy whose last name is the same as my first name and then the next weekend finishes by handing them out at someone else’s shower. I should’ve known then but my family said it was fine and tried to tell me it was all going to be ok. After letting me hysterically cry it out, my mom helped me decide my plans. Luckily, I’d kind of picked up things here and there for the shower because they were cheap. As I did my sister would accuse me of doing her job. 

    All she did is buy one- just one- bag of chips and expects that to equate a shower. she used food stamps she bought off someone and that’s all she got. The reason my mom found out (and told me) is because she told her last minute she was too broke to buy a cake and asked her to buy stock cupcakes from Sam’s club as well as hamburgers and hot dogs because she couldn’t pay. I had told her I didn’t want either of those things but I think she thought she’d be able to blame my mom for doing it. So the new plan is that we’re having nachos and no cake but the custom cookies I ordered and bought for me and baby. If my mom hadn’t told me, I would’ve had an epic level meltdown at my shower so i’m really grateful that she did and I was able to go to Walmart today to pick up some supplies and just make it feel like it wasn’t last minute planned.

    the worst part about all of this is when my sister got married 5 years ago, I planned it and paid out of pocket for everything in under 12 hours while living 4 hours away. I paid $250 out of pocket and she now has memorable photos for her wedding day that she wouldn’t have without me. And i cant stress enough- I didn’t even expect her to pay anything! Just plan it! I’ve bent over backwards for her and I just feel betrayed. End rant/rave. (Sorry for the long one. I’m still pissed obviously).

    Questions: Have any of you felt ridiculously emotional?

    GTKY- Summer traditions?: Well I’m a summer baby and my son is due on my birthday. My sister’s birthday is a week after and so that was usually when we’d barbecue. Even if he isn’t born on my day like I hope, I plan to make our birthdays a special mommy son celebration. Parties growing up with a summer birthday usually just end up being your parents’ friends because all of your friends have summer vacations and camp and such so if he does a party, I’ll make it the first or second week of school being back.

    I also second the camping thing! I’m allergic to fish now but I used to go fishing and camping with my dad. It was the best thing. S’mores and nights under the stars are magical.

    I’ll come back and reply to y’all after I post this.
  • leylea89leylea89
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    @fromcatstokids you’ve already gotten some great advice from @mamanbebe @cbeanz and others. But at feel you. I get 6 weeks paid maternity but I’m not going back so i’ll have to search for a job and i just feel overwhelmed by that. I had originally planned to go back as a pharmacy tech but the pharmacist never hit me back and now I might be at the truck stop. I’d stay with my current job but I’m moving and there isn’t a Starbucks there. Moral of the story- I think @cbeanz is right about applying being stressful and maybe an overshadow if your Mat leave. Like @mamanbebe I’d see if applying meant you lost the severance. I don’t feel like they can take that from you though because you’re not getting fired for not doing your job if you don’t get it, your position is just being dissolved.
  • Thank you to everyone for your supportive comments! Talking to you is helping me work through my own thoughts about what is going on.

    @mamanbebe If I accept the new position, the severance offer would be off the table. I can apply for it, and change my mind, but I've been assured that I would be a top choice candidate for it, so don't want to apply unless I want it. The new position doesn't sound like I would enjoy it, and would require so much more mental energy, when my current position was already at the top of what I wanted to do while having a baby at home.

    @jennm0724 I've thought about that too. I've been with this company for almost 13 years, and have plenty of paid time off because of it. A new company would not be as easy to take time off from. 

    @blackhottamales That is a good point that I don't have to take exactly 6 months off. I feel like it would be easier finding a job in November or December vs January. Unfortunately the severance has a hard deadline. The new position (similar to my current one) must be applied to by the 10th, and I only have until the 12th to apply for and accept any other role in the company.

    @Cbeanz Thanks for sharing your similar experience. I didn't even think of child care being required! An additional stressors during an already hard time. An important thing to consider.

    @canuckmomma The company is restructuring my side of the business, and everyone in my position is having to make this decision. Its just especially bad timing for me. We knew some kind of change was happening, just not the details until recently. 

    @leylea89 I would be so upset!! Thank goodness for your mom, and that you have the ability to finance the shower. You are completely justified in being pissed. 
    Also, your situation sounds even more stressful than mine. I'm sorry to hear you are in such a tough spot with work. I hope things work out well for you!
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