WRW January 2019

jackie_dunny

Hi ladies! I figured I’d try to start this back up again but since there’s only a few of us out here, maybe a monthly board instead of a weekly one. 

***General TW that this thread might contain discussions mentioning MC and loss.*** 

Welcome to Waiting Room Wednesday! You can express your thoughts, feelings, and frustrations on not TTC and connect with others who are in the same boat. TTC can be a long journey, and having to wait makes it feel even longer -- even if it is for a good reason. 

I invite you to resurrect this thread at any point in the week if you have something to say. Treat this like an ongoing conversation. 

Benched = involuntarily not NTNP/TTC and "out of the game," usually due to medical reasons TTA = avoiding pregnancy by using protection or FAM, usually for non-health-related reasons 
__________________________________________________________________ 

When do you think you will start TTC? 

What brings you to WRW?

Any R/R?

GTKY: What’s your go to hot beverage on a cold day? Tea, coffee, hot cocoa, something else?

jackie_dunny

When do you think you will start TTC? Discussions start August 2019

What brings you to WRW?
I had crazy baby fever a few months ago and while it usually goes away after a day or two, it stuck around for ages. However, after getting a puppy it’s died down quite a bit. But I figured it’s still good to be prepared and have a community to jump into if it should come back. 

Any R/R?
My rant and rave kind of go hand in hand. Because of my long work day and my long commute, I have a 13 hour day and therefore I’m not home very long and it’s hard to be able to help out around the house but I do what I can. DH really is a dear/darling husband. He’s a saint really. I’m going through some tough times mentally/emotionally right now and if I snap at him, he stays calm and patient and let’s me get it all out of my system and then gives me a cuddle or asks what I want to do next as if nothing happened. I don’t know how he brushes it off so easily. He does all the laundry, takes care of our puppy more than I can, makes me a cup of tea every morning and lays my pajamas out for me every night. That just scratches the surface of how wonderful he is. I’m a very lucky girl. I just wish I were able to do more for him. 
TL;DR: rave: DH is incredible. rant: I don’t have time to do more for him 

GTKY: What’s your go to hot beverage on a cold day? Tea, coffee, hot cocoa, something else?
Well, I hate coffee and I drink a load of tea now that I live in England. We literally have tea rounds where twice a day someone will go around and make people cups of tea. And we get an afternoon tea break. I couldn’t think of anything more British when I read that in my contract lol. But that being said, I’m a hot cocoa girl. Absolutely love it. One of the only good things about winter. 

thatcma

Thanks @jackie_dunsford for starting this

When do you think you will start TTC? Probably not until April at the very earliest to start discussing it. Long story short I had a great job with great insurance, lost that job, just recently got back onto insurance and won't have my 1yr at my new job until October.

What brings you to WRW? I don't fit into TTGP just yet. Though I am participating in their GTKY threads.

Any R/R? *TW* My 18mo will NOT keep a constant sleep pattern and we are super struggling to quit BF'ing. A few nights ago she slept through the night and it was glorious, but now we are back to waking up in the middle of the night for no reason and crazy fighting sleep.

GTKY: What’s your go to hot beverage on a cold day? Tea, coffee, hot cocoa, something else? I just started drinking coffee so I am not super into it. I am 100% a hot cocoa girl.

jackie_dunny

@thatcma *TW* I know babies aren’t on the same level as puppies but I know the feeling with the waking in the middle of the night. Luckily our puppy doesn’t cry in the night but we’re still in the stages of house training so we take turns waking up in the middle each night to take him out since he can’t hold it all night yet. We’re progressing wonderfully but we’re still so sleepy. 

Also #teamhotcocoa !!

thatcma

@jackie_dunsford sounds like a newborn XD!

jackie_dunny

@thatcma it feels like it XD! It’s definitely helped with the baby fever that’s for sure 

jackie_dunny

Hi ladies! How’s everyones month been going? Anything exciting to share?

Frank (the puppy) really is like a newborn.

He’s usually so good and doesn’t cry in the night. We wake ourselves up to take him out in the middle of the night before he wakes himself up to go out so he doesn’t learn that crying gets him attention. Every now and then he’ll cry when you put him back because he wants some attention but after literally no more than 2 minutes max I’d say, he quiets down and goes back to sleep. 

*TMI warning*
Well, last night DH took him out as normal and he cried when he put him back and he quickly quieted down. However when DH woke up this morning, apparently there was poo all over his puppy pen 🤦🏻‍♀️ poor husband quietly cleaned it up and cleaned off his paws without waking me up (until his rinse off at least) because he wanted me to sleep. He’s such a saint. So by the time I woke up for the day, the mess was already cleared. What a lucky girl I am. Poor little puppy as well. He was actually crying to go to the bathroom we had just let him out so we didn’t realize. 

thatcma

@jackie_dunsford That was really nice of DH! Something mine would totally do.

Things are going alright. Just frustrated about a number of things. General *TW* for the paragraph below.

First of all is how not predictable AF is PP. I keep having like 2-3 months that are predictable then it happens like 3-4 days early. ALSO is how horrible the flow is. I decided to try a cup because the first 3-4 days are SO HEAVY that even with a super tampon I usually bleed through within 1-2 hours. We will see how that goes next month. Secondly is my DD (almost 19mo). She just started 3 out of her 4 canines and has been SUPER clingy and fussy. She has been needing to BF more which I really want to stop BFing but I don't think I can keep my sanity if we try while she is teething. I love the connection but I am ready to have myself back and work on diet and exercise. Thirdly is that I DO want to TTC but some days I don't think I can handle it, and haven't talked to DH about it but am considering I need to.

SIGH. Whew. Sorry for the rant!

jackie_dunny

@thatcma that’s so frustrating I feel like I can hear you venting all of this very quickly and this is you now

Unfortunately I don’t have anything to add about your LO as I don’t share that experience BUT I definitely understand the unpredictable AF. Mine has finally started to regulate for the first time in my life.

thatcma

@jackie_dunny Hopefully it normalizes around when we start TFAS. *crosses fingers*

jackie_dunny

@thatcma keeping my fingers and toes crossed for you! 

I also need to vent a little myself. We had an offer accepted on a house towards the end of October and it’s taken a ridiculously long time for us to get our move in date. We just found out today that the reason it’s taken so long is because they’re having trouble transferring the title of the land. They’re now saying that it would be “irresponsible” to give us a timeframe as things could still go wrong and that if we want to we can pull out at anytime. We were really hoping to get the keys by this weekend and now it looks like there’s no end in sight so DH and I are just really down 😔. I’m currently living with my ILs and they are really wonderful but DH and I just really want to start our own life together. We got married in May and he had to go back to England after our honeymoon while I stayed in America. We were apart  for our first  3 months of marriage while we waited for my visa to be accepted and now we have this housing issue. We just want our chance to be newlyweds and start our lives together already! 

thatcma

@jackie_dunny that is incredibly frustrating! I can't imagine being in limbo for that long. Hope it works out sooner rather than later. Though have you guys thought about looking for a new home?

jackie_dunny

@thatcma we got such a great deal on this house and house prices have risen quite a bit since then. I wouldn’t say it’s a our dream house but it’s probably a perfect start house, especially for the price. Plus, after dreaming about it, talking about, continuously driving past it, and planning it for 3 months our hearts and minds are kind of set on it. Plus, by the time we get an offer accepted on another house, we might as well have waited for this house.

Here in England “chains” are quite common. So as first time buyers, we have no chain. And as the seller is moving in with his partner, he has no onward chain. For arguments sake, let’s say he WASNT moving in with his partner. We wouldn’t be able to get a move in date until he found a house, and he wouldn’t get a move in date until his seller found a house and it can go on and on and on. It took our friends 6 months to get their house after everything was settled. After this land thing is settled, if we had a chain, it could’ve still gone on for months.  So it’s just not worth the risk. Plus, our solicitors are fighting like mad on our behalf. So just FX we can get some answers soon! 

ETA: words

jackie_dunny

And just like that it’s the last WRW of January! Anyone else think January absolutely flew by? I think it’s only me and you @thatcma in here but @chinadoll2522 I’ve seen you post on some of the other threads. Care to join us? The more the merrier! 

AFM still no update really on the house but we’ve now got the details of the other solicitor so we can start hounding them for answers. DH is on the case! Which is great because I can’t stand living at my ILs much longer 🤦🏻‍♀️ 

chinadoll2522

@jackie_dunny Ahhh, I didn't notice this thread until the last minute! Thank you for tagging me though.

I wish you luck on getting your house!

Little Rant.

My husband and I where living with my own mother and just resently moved out after three years there. I won't go into details but there where some personal issues I've been having with my mom for over a year and it has a lot to do with her life and financial choices. We're feeling really good now we moved out, I can see moving into the future a lot better now. My mother thinks us moving is the worst idea ever and has been pretty mad at us but hasn't said much to our faces....I'm not sure why she is surprised though...moving in was only temporary in the first place, we stayed two years longer then intended. Now that we are renting, I feel like an adult again!

Rant: Mother issues Rave: I'm so glad I flew from the nest.

jackie_dunny

@chinadoll2522 I definitely feel you on the the disagreements with my mother with life/financial choices. 

Its definitely good to be out of the nest and starting your own life with your husband. I’m sorry you’re having a hard time with your mom not being happy for you 😕

AFM we got an update on the house! The land issue has been sorted and we shall be getting our move in date some time this week! We should (FX) have the keys next week! Wahoo! I get to fly out of the nest now as well! 

chinadoll2522

@jackie_dunny Thank you.  At this point my mom and are not 'arguing' but we don't agree and I'm pretty sure we won't. She's silently mad that I moved out because I'll be paying rent every month when I could stay at her house 'rent free' but I was paying for things while she wasn't working. I bought most of the food, paid for internet and paied a storage unit every month that has been bleeding us dry....with stuff in it she really dosn't need and all of us have told her to get rid of. But I digreess...it's nice to get some of this off my chest.

Congratulations!  I'm glad things are moving forward for you. 🙂

thatcma

@chinadoll2522 Hi! Sorry to hear about your relationship with your mom. 

@jackie_dunny WOOHOO!! Happy to hear about the house development! I hate mobile bumping because I don't get a notice when I am tagged so sorry I have missed this!

jackie_dunny

@chinadoll2522 it’s always nice to be able to vent to internet strangers. There’s no judgement (not really anyway) because no one knows who you are. 

@thatcma is there a way to get it set up so you do get a notification? I use the app and just check the boards manually. The only time I get a notification is if I’m already in the app and someone tags me. 

lionwholived

When do you think you will start TTC? 

Our whole family situation is complicated but I have to talk to my hormones doctor and wait for an RE referral to kick me out an actual appointment. A couple months at least, is my guess. My fiance will probably try next month but we're not expecting anything until they get their PCOS treated. About 2 weeks out from their endo appt. 

What brings you to WRW?

We're a trans couple, we just officially took ourselves off the bench we were put on by a house fire at the end of 2017. We're in a new city so we have to find a new donor and we've both got IF issues but we're making all our appointments and starting the prenatals and it's ON my MIND. 

Any R/R?

Not a ton going on right now. I wish it was spring already and that my tax return would come in. 

GTKY: What’s your go to hot beverage on a cold day? Tea, coffee, hot cocoa, something else?

Coffee all the way!


edit: noticed right after I posted this it was in january instead of february. Whoops!! sorry!

jackie_dunny

@lionwholived welcome! All I can say is dang, life sure seems to be knocking you down you seem pretty strong though especially to keep fighting through all that. 

Hopefully this is your month that things will start looking up for you!