Unpopular Opinion (UO) Thursday, 12/13

WinchesterGirl

Got an unpopular opinion? Share it here! BYO Popcorn. 

WinchesterGirl

I'm going to start us off with a bang. Please don't throw rocks at me. 

I hate the term "Fed is best". I get that is meant to be supportive, but I feel like it misses the mark. 

1. Fed is the parenting job. It's required to keep your kid alive. 
2. I feel like it encourages people not to make an informed decision. There are pros and cons to formula, breast feeding, donor milk, and everything in between. Research the options, and make an informed decision on what's actually best for YOUR family. 
3. What's "best" in general is irrelevant. It's what's best for your family. So I feel like this back-handedly encourages the mommy wars to say what's best for someone else. 

deecherise

We really shouldn't drink at all while pregnant. From a scientific perspective, alcohol is a toxin, and humans are incredibly individualistic in the way they metabolize toxins, meaning that drinking a glass of wine every once in a while is probably fine for some folks but could be devastating for others. The genetic determinants of alcohol metabolism in humans have not been fully elucidated, and there are a myriad of other, safer ways to reduce stress.  Drinking during pregnancy doesn't makes someone a bad person, but it's an unnecessary risk. Public health PSA of the day.

hey_clever_girl

@deecherise YES. I don't TOUCH alcohol once I know I am pregnant. I have a few friends who will have a glass of wine (or even a cocktail!) every now and then once they're in the 2nd trimester and it just baffles me all to hell. 

hey_clever_girl

I don't like Shonda Rimes shows.

deecherise

@runningisrad it's baffling to me as well. My best friend is studying FASDs for her PhD, and there are some horrific case reports that just ruin any and all urges for me. 

database6

deecherise said:

We really shouldn't drink at all while pregnant. From a scientific perspective, alcohol is a toxin, and humans are incredibly individualistic in the way they metabolize toxins, meaning that drinking a glass of wine every once in a while is probably fine for some folks but could be devastating for others. The genetic determinants of alcohol metabolism in humans have not been fully elucidated, and there are a myriad of other, safer ways to reduce stress.  Drinking during pregnancy doesn't makes someone a bad person, but it's an unnecessary risk. Public health PSA of the day.

My UO is that I judge the hell out of people who drink or do drugs during pregnancy. I saw somewhere recently that Cosmo says it’s okay to drink, while the American Acadamy of Pesiatrics says it’s not, and all other reputable sources says it is not okay, so why chance it?  If you are an alcoholic and are having issues stopping, I have compassion and understanding, but otherwise just don’t do it. 

mkrel

Well y'all can judge me.  I had a glass of wine in second and third tri a handful of times in my last pregnancy.  Both my current and previous OB told me that there are plenty of studies showing that small amounts of alcohol show no negative impact, but there is no exact line of where is too much because it would be unethical to test out something like drugs or alcohol on pregnant women, so with the US being such a litigious and over indulgent society, they have to recommend zero alcohol.  One of them even discussed with me how other countries drink while pregnant and it isn't frowned upon.  I think for everything, discussing with your provider and making an informed decision is best.  I certainly don't think a few glasses of wine during the course of many weeks of pregnancy is going to impact your baby.  

hey_clever_girl

@deecherise @database6 I mean I looooooove me some winter stouts & porters, but I can have some next year. They'll still be around once my kiddo is born. 

deecherise

mkrel said:

Well y'all can judge me.  I had a glass of wine in second and third tri a handful of times in my last pregnancy.  Both my current and previous OB told me that there are plenty of studies showing that small amounts of alcohol show no negative impact, but there is no exact line of where is too much because it would be unethical to test out something like drugs or alcohol on pregnant women, so with the US being such a litigious and over indulgent society, they have to recommend zero alcohol.  One of them even discussed with me how other countries drink while pregnant and it isn't frowned upon.  I think for everything, discussing with your provider and making an informed decision is best.  I certainly don't think a few glasses of wine during the course of many weeks of pregnancy is going to impact your baby.  

And those other countries have high rates of FASDs-- Brits have an estimated rate of 17% for example. 

It's not simply because it's unethical, because there are plenty of animal models. It's also because of what I said--the variances in alcohol metabolism are too high to get conclusive study results. What is a "small amount" of alcohol when women vary drastically in height, weight, and lifestyle? Even ignoring genetic predisposition, there are currently too many factors that would need to be controlled for. If the risk of impaired brain function is worth it to you, that's you and your little red wagon.  

olivemomma

Alright since we’ve gone there on the whole drinking thing - I’m a big wine lover. I don’t consider it in any way a problem but we collect wine and when not pregnant it’s basically a part of daily life for me. With DD 1 I went cold turkey (we even had a trip planned to wine country before finding out we were pregnant in which I angrily dd’d my husband around for 2 days and didn’t do anything more than enjoy the smell of the wine). However, in my second pregnancy I did indulge in the occasional small glass of wine (probably less then 10 throughout my pregnancy). I definitely think you can overdo it but also do not judge those who want an occasional small glass later in pregnancy. So if you judge on that what else do you judge pregnant women on - are you going to hate on someone for eating a deli sandwich? Sushi? Taking a bath or shower where the water is too hot? Not working out? Eating too much sugar? Where do you draw the line? Are you 100% perfect during your entire pregnancy? I just feel being super judgmental or pregnant women is almost always hypocritical as none of us are perfect. 

mkrel

@deecherise I completely respect your points and your opinion, and you are free to judge away.  To me, the opinions of my OB and my husband are the ones that are important during my pregnancy and as long as we are all on the same page with how I am caring for myself and my baby, I'm not worried about anyone else's opinion. 

@olivemomma I feel the same way.   

deecherise

@olivemomma Lol I know I'm not perfect. But yeah, I do low key judge people who won't heat their deli meat or eat cooked fish for 9 months, especially when Listeria and Toxo are known causes of miscarriage and stillbirth. Nobody's going to eat 100% excellent while pregnant or stick thermometers in their bathwater, but if there are obvious avoidable risks, why take them? 

ElcaB

deecherise said:

@olivemomma Lol I know I'm not perfect. But yeah, I do low key judge people who won't heat their deli meat or eat cooked fish for 9 months, especially when Listeria and Toxo are known causes of miscarriage and stillbirth. Nobody's going to eat 100% excellent while pregnant or stick thermometers in their bathwater, but if there are obvious avoidable risks, why take them? 

Whoa, whoa, whoa, you can take my wine and beer but not my Vitos from Jimmy John's! Early FFFC: I still eat deli meat occasionally without heating it up.

olivemomma

@deecherise I totally get your point. Of course I’m not advocating for daily drinking or large amounts of wine or any other substance. However, I guess I feel if I want to have a 1/2 a glass of wine a small handful of times throughout my pregnancy that is no more likely to be harmful then most anything else I do. I mean, I’m sure you don’t judge women for eating salad but there’s a possibility she could get listeria poisoning from the lettuce. Soft serve ice cream has the risk of listeria poisoning. I guess my point is is that virtually EVERYTHING carries some risk while pregnant. 

Honest question - do all you judgers also refrain from wine or whatever else 100% while breastfeeding? Even if you are breastfeeding for well over a year? 

krb99

I guess since we’re on the topic of food choices, it’s my opinion that the national safety systems for food are more important to getting/avoiding food poisoning than avoiding unheated deli meat. Technically it’s been 16 years since deli meat caused an outbreak in the US, and due to previous outbreaks new safety measures are in place for deli meat preparation (not that it can’t happen again...) but meanwhile pasteurized milk, melons, and stone fruit have been causing Listeria outbreaks. So I think it’s more important that our elected officials give enough resources to and those in positions of authority at the Department of Agriculture Food Safety and Inspection Service do a good job at making sure the food supply is safe, because what they do can result in hundreds of people getting sick, while the actions of one pregnant woman can only get her/her pregnancy sick.

database6

@olivemomma I did refrain from drinking while breastfeeding, and breastfed my first for under a year. 

I don’t think it is fair to lump eating deli meat with drinking alcohol during pregnancy, for me personally though, I don’t do anything that is not recommended. And while I may side eye the drinkers, my best friend smoked pot throughout her pregnancy. I also would not do that, but she is still my friend. I told her once I didn’t agree and that was it. 

I accidentally drank gourmet pasturized juice this morning and called my doctor. It may be neurotic, but it’s been hard to get PGAL, so that’s just my mental state. 

I support others having their opinion as long as they let me have mine, judging or not.

ill go ahead and put it out there that I judge the smokers during pregnancy too.  Doesn’t mean I don’t love ya, just judging that decision too.  

vvitchhazel

I totally side eye pregnant drinking. I just don't understand the need for any unnecessary risk. 🤷🏻‍♀️ But we're all free to make our own informed decisions.

I don't like Shonda Rhimes one bit, but I still watch everything. Because I'm an addict. I'm not proud. Mmm Jackson Avery.

My UO: I think TV use is totally fine for kids. My almost 3 year old is SOOO smart and I credit a lot of that too the stuff she watches on TV.

smmatt08

WinchesterGirl said:

I'm going to start us off with a bang. Please don't throw rocks at me. 

I hate the term "Fed is best". I get that is meant to be supportive, but I feel like it misses the mark. 

1. Fed is the parenting job. It's required to keep your kid alive. 
2. I feel like it encourages people not to make an informed decision. There are pros and cons to formula, breast feeding, donor milk, and everything in between. Research the options, and make an informed decision on what's actually best for YOUR family. 
3. What's "best" in general is irrelevant. It's what's best for your family. So I feel like this back-handedly encourages the mommy wars to say what's best for someone else. 

No rocks being thrown. However, as someone who struggled to BF, but felt a lot of pressure to TRY to continue, I recited this mantra to myself when we made the decision to supplement with formula.

Totally agree that the term misses the mark but I think a term that embraces the idea that "it doesn't matter where a baby gets nourishment from, what matters is the health and happiness of the family" is necessary; not in a defensive way, rather in a self-supporting way.

drmrsthecounselor

My UO is that ranch dressing is super disgusting but you can eat ketchup on anything. :P 

Beauxbaton

drmrsthecounselor said:

My UO is that ranch dressing is super disgusting but you can eat ketchup on anything. :P 

We are opposites. I loooove ranch dressing. The smell of ketchup makes me want to gag even when not pregnant. 

deecherise

@drmrsthecounselor YASSS
Hold the ranch, but ketchup/bbq sauce on everything!

krb99

I am on team ketchup > ranch! 😁

olivemomma

Ketchup combined with ranch is amazing! It’s also great mixed with mayo! Mmm now I was some fries...

olivemomma

@database6 I totally respect that you ‘walk the walk’ with your views. I also totally don’t judge you for your views, I just don’t like when pregnant women get all judgey on one another. However, I must admit that I also judge smoking (honestly weather you are pregnant or not) - see there I go being all hypocritical! I admit it!

hey_clever_girl

@vvitchhazel agree on the TV time. Both my kids get more TV and screen time than they “should,” and my 8 year old reads on a 5th grade level. 🤷🏻‍♀️ It hasn’t negatively affected her thus far. My 2 year old knows all his letters and numbers and I’m pretty sure some of the things he watches/apps he plays on my phone contribute to that.

vvitchhazel

@runningisrad Same. My daughter has known her ABCs and has been able to count to 20 since she was 2.5. She is also really talented, musically. I haven't taught her any of it... Big ol thanks to Bounce Patrol and Dave and Ava! 😂

WinchesterGirl

Beauxbaton said: LLP

drmrsthecounselor said:

My UO is that ranch dressing is super disgusting but you can eat ketchup on anything. :P 

We are opposites. I loooove ranch dressing. The smell of ketchup makes me want to gag even when not pregnant. 

You're both wrong. 😁 Ketchup and ranch are both delicious, but have different applications.

@smmatt08 I can totally see that. We just need a better phrase.

cfoz

Yep I’m team @WinchesterGirl both have a place in my heart and I refuse to choose sides!

My UO is that I Don’t like fish tacos. 🤢🤮

suzycupcake

My UO is that deli meat is disgusting. 

suzycupcake

Plus also, hot sauce can go on pizza, eggs, rice, chips, fried chicken, corn, popcorn, all the tacos, on a spoon.

cato99

I concur with @suzycupcake about deli meat. I didn’t even realize people ate it so frequently and enthusiastically until I started reading pregnancy boards and now I come to see it’s a HOT TOPIC

hey_clever_girl

@cato99 @suzycupcake oh man, I love deli turkey (especially cracked peppercorn) and salami. I could eat a pound of salami, by myself, in one sitting. #suchhealthy #muchnutrition #wow

ElcaB

suzycupcake said:

Plus also, hot sauce can go on pizza, eggs, rice, chips, fried chicken, corn, popcorn, all the tacos, on a spoon.

@suzycupcake hello, soulmate. What's your favorite hot sauce? I'm super into Sriracha (so into it, I have a bottle at work) and The Pepper Plant.

hey_clever_girl

@suzycupcake @ElcaB ooooo ladies I need to send y'all some local hot sauce made here in Chattanooga called Hoff Sauce. They have several kinds, one made with ghost peppers, and they're all amazeballs.

ElcaB

@runningisrad YOU KNOW MY ADDRESS.

hey_clever_girl

@ElcaB

 

smmatt08

The typos in the pinned threads on this board bother me. @olivemomma - help a sister out

olivemomma

@smmatt08 what can I do to make your life a little better?

Edited to say I fixed the spelling typo I didn’t notice - thanks for calling me out though

smmatt08

@olivemomma You own the ultrasound thread so I think you can edit the title! ETA: Didn't intend to call you out, sorry!

suzycupcake

@runningisrad If you can ever get anything from Volpes in St Louis, you've scored what some real salami tastes like. Also, if Hoff & Pepper's opening statement is, "Dear Hot Sauce Lovers, You're Welcome.", I love them already. https://www.hoffandpepper.com/

@ElcaB +1 for spelling it correctly. Sriracha only goes in my ramen or pho. Okay sometimes on my pizza too if nothing else is available. Tapatio in my popcorn. Tajin and tapatio on my corn on the cob. Trader Joe's makes a really good medium red salsa and a great mild green salsa (both refrigerated because I cannot stand salsa from a jar, only hot sauce) that I like which can go on a lot of things. Recently, I went to a craft fair in my city. A company called Bravado Spice Co was there from Texas. The ladies and I stopped there to sample. Crimson and Crimson special reserve oh my God! The Pineapple & Habanero was pretty good too. 

Tabasco or tapatio on my eggs. Last night I dipped my baked chicken and my mashed potatoes in Crimson mmmmm! Cholula is good on occasion. There are some fire roasted hot sauces that I do not like the taste of. How about you?