Midwife Mamas?

zaraanity

FTM here! I’m also from Saskatchewan, Canada which is relevant to this post - midwives are covered under our health region, but are also in short supply so we go on their wait list and hope to be selected here. 

Has anyone else gone the midwife route, or is planning to? Why/why not?

mamanbebe

I am planning to. I had an OB before and although she was an awesome person, I definitely felt like it was a birthing conveyor belt of treating you like this isn't a natural process and I ended up with an unnecessary CS (no, really). I really hope to embrace the natural process with this baby. I'm going to try to go with a birthing center as well. We have a great hospital nearby that offers midwives and doulas but I feel like in a hospital environment, I am more likely to have a repeat C-section. 

zaraanity

That’s part of what compels me to a midwife... I like my OB so far too, but it’s not even a certainty I’d deliver with her anyway since she’s part of a call group! @mamanbebe

nopegoat

I wanted to this go around but the only one insurance covered delivered at a birth center 45mins away. I have super quick births. There's no way I would make it especially if we hit any traffic. 

NicholeL16

I used a midwife/birthing center with my last pregnancy and will do so again with this one. Even though I wasn’t successful at delivering at the birthing center last time, the care I received throughout my pregnancy and during my very long labor was incredible. 

mamanbebe

@nopegoat Are there any midwives with privileges at your hospital of choice? 

@NicholeL16 Would you be open to sharing your birth story? 

sonorous622

I feel lucky that the practice I go to is all midwives so I know that no matter who is on call when I deliver it will be one of them. I'm not sure DH knows this yet (it's our first child) so I'm planning on telling him before the first appointment so he isn't confused when a "doctor" never shows up! 

I'm with @mamanbebe, I would also love to hear any previous birth stories related to midwife care. 

NicholeL16

@mamanbebe Sure! I had a pretty smooth pregnancy but towards the end my son was pressing on my sciatic nerve. It was very painful and caused me to almost drag one of my legs when I walked. I’m pretty certain walking that way is what put my son in a position that wasn’t good for labor. I went into labor around midnight on Wednesday (9 days after my due date) and things progressed very slowly over the next 60 hours. We walked and bounced and did everything we could think of to keep things moving but I stalled around 7CM. Even though I was doing well and so was my son I was extremely fatigued from laboring for so long. My water had been ruptured for too long and my son was developing capage (a cone head) from being engaged for an extended period. On Early Friday morning we decided to transfer from the birthing center to the hospital. As soon as I knew I wasn’t going to deliver my son vaginally the labor became overwhelming for me. I got checked in at the hospital and received my epidural. It was the most amazing thing ever. The on call doctor was great and allowed me to try and labor for two more hours with the help of pitocin but there was no change so I had a c section around noon friday. They told me that he was poorly positioned preventing him from moving down the way he should have. I was terrified of the c section but I didn’t have a difficult recovery at all. We were discharged Sunday morning. I received really good care all around and even though a c section isn’t what I wanted, I know we did everything we could to avoid it and am thankful we both remained healthy throughout.

ironcat2300

I will be using a midwife. First pregnancy for me and my husband so we really have no idea what to expect. Little first appointment is on two weeks (I’m 5 weeks now). Thnks for sharing your stories! Any suggestions for a newbie on what I should be researching?

ketomommy

I debated between the two.  My last pregnancy care (with an MD) was horrible.  It ended in an emergency c and I nearly died.  I saw a different OB before we tried to conceive.  She made a point about possibly having a planned c, vs attempting a VBAC.  Her thought was that I will be physically prepared for it, it will be more sterile and less rushed.  We decided to go with an OB this time for a planned c.  If I could do pregnancy 1 all over again, I'd go with a midwife, but at a hospital.

mamanbebe

@ketomommy I am sorry you had such a scary first birth experience. I hope that everything feels more in control for you this time ❤️

Panaceia

I just stayed with my GP for my first pregnancy. Long story short both DD and I almost died during delivery  (which ended in an emergency c-section) due to something the nurses missed during all 27 hours of my labour in hospital (there was no one from my GP's practice on call when I went into labour so I was just assigned to whoever was on duty at the hospital at the time). Grrr. If it weren't for the fact that I have to have an RCS this time around I would definitely opt for a midwife. But since I can't I'm at least making sure to be with an OB of my choosing this time around.

mamanbebe

@Panaceia , I'm sorry you also had a terrible delivery experience. I'm glad you and DD are OK now and I hope you find an OB that you feel good about. 

mrscammack

We are going with a midwife this time, my first pregnancy we used an ob. I’m also in Canada, Ontario to be exact. Luckily the centre in my area was able to get me in right away as I called as soon as I got my bfp and they had a team available for my due date! 

I decided midwife this time around since i had an uncomplicated pregnancy and labour/delivery with my first and I really wanted the person I saw over my pregnancy to be the one there when I delivered as with my first my OB was not on call when I gave birth and a stranger delivered my daughter. I also love the aftercare program, someone from my team will visit 3 times the first week to check on us and I think they’ll be more helpful with breastfeeding support as I was unfortunately unable to nurse my daughter and it’s very important to me to try with the new baby! 

zaraanity

I'm definitely hoping for midwife at a hospital. We should know mid-December when they do their patient selections!

dizzymom-2

I’ve used both a CNM and CPM if anyone has any questions. Hands down the most comfortable care and birthing teams. Unfortunately my last birth did end in a cesarean so I don’t have experience birthing with one, but my care and labor experience were both superb. I did try multiple OB’s first and it just wasn’t for me. I’m really hoping for a CNM to take me this time around with the hopes of a vbac. 

mamanbebe

@dizzymom-2 How did you feel about your experience with CNM vs CPM? The center I'm having a consult with next week has both but mostly CNM. 

also @NicholeL16 I totally forgot to reply to you but thank you for sharing your story, it's both enlightening and helpful. Did you end up paying an extraordinary amount more because of switching mid-labor to the hospital after laboring in the birthing center? 

dizzymom-2

@mamanbebe They were both wonderful, but if I had to choose I would opt for a CPM. CNMs are a little more clinical and have more formal schooling. CPM’s learn more from experience, especially outside of a hospital environment. My CPM was way more laid back and relaxed which I really liked. The CPM was definitely also less inclined to push medical interventions unless absolutely necessary and even then I still always felt like I had options and was the definitive decision maker which is really important to me. 

justtpeachee

I started at a hospital with my son and I really didn't enjoy it and felt my doctor didn't listen to my concerns and I felt like I didn't have control over my own pregnancy I decided to switch to a birthing center with a midwife and I loved it. I will be doing the same this pregnancy!

mamanbebe

@dizzymom-2 that's really interesting, thank you for sharing. I've only had one nurse midwife so far, who was OK but not quite the right match for me. I was a little freaked out by CPMs at first because I am still wired for formal medicine approach but we have a midwifery college near me and after seeing the rigorous schooling that they go through I feel like I'd totally be comfortable with one if insurance allows. 

NicholeL16

@mamanbebe it was hard financially to pay for both. We had paid off the birthing center before hand so we were left with what the insurance didn’t cover at the hospital.

mamanbebe

@NicholeL16 It seems like there are so many hidden costs at the hospital.. anesthesiology and then the pediatric stuff were totally unexpected.

Panaceia

@mrscammack I'm in Ontario too!

mamanbebe

I just called my insurance to inform them of my pregnancy, which apparently they no longer care about and made me feel dumb for. So then I ask to verify that I can use a midwife for delivery and the guy questions why I don't want to use a doctor and has now placed me on hold for 10 minutes because he cannot figure it out

gembud

Hi there ladies! I am in NJ and am using a midwife. I'm very excited, my first appointment is the 12th and I will be seven weeks on the dot! Not sure what to expect, but absolutely looking forward to it! 

zaraanity

@mamanbebe wowwww, that's so rude and frustrating. Did you end up getting it sorted?? 

mamanbebe

@zaraanity Not yet the guy thought that seeing a midwife was the same as seeing a specialist and also said I would need to call them to check if individual providers were in-network "because we do not have a list of them".. which was bizarre. I think I'm going to have to leave it up to the providers to sort out what all my benefits are. United are usually not so terrible to deal with but there is a first time for everything.. 

zaraanity

@manabebe you're in the States, yeah? That sounds really stressful and confusing. hoping it resolves well for you!

bellebeauti

I will be for sure using a midwife, but I need to figure out if I will be using a birth center or stay with the midwives practice that I used with my first. 

mamanbebe

@zaraanity yes and thank you I have a feeling something will work out. I was just thinking (irrationally) this afternoon that why do I need anyone for my body to have a baby (of course I need help) but mostly because why do these insurance companies get to pick how, where and with whom my children enter the world when they don't have to live with the decisions or experience for the rest of their lives. Oh women's rights.. I hope some day people will get around to understanding that we aren't anyone's property or burden. 

zaraanity

@mamanbebe ugh I feel this very very often. The medical system is just as bad over here for “gatekeeping” our decisions about our own bodies, and it just makes me so sad. We are rational, grown-ass humans, perfectly capable of making decisions for ourselves. I feel you’ll get it sorted too, though!

mamanbebe

It's confirmed! I'll be using a birthing center! I went in for my consult today with my preferred midwifery group and they were lovely. They offered to get me in at the end of the month for my first appt but I'm opting for mid-Dec when I'll be around 9 weeks. I'm so excited that they will be attending my birth and hopefully making my VBAC dreams come true. 

pearldare

I'm going with a CPM at home. This is my first pregnancy and I am very fortunate in that I've known my midwife since I was two (she was my mom's midwife for my 2 younger sisters). Now figuring out if I can get insurance to cover it will be the interesting part.

mamanbebe

@pearldare It's possible! I could have home birth covered on my insurance plan with a midwife if I hadn't a prior cesarean. 

quinniebear

I'm going with a midwife, hopefully. It just sounds like a good fit for me. First meeting 11/26!

xtinecatherine

I’m going for a hospital birth with a midwife like my last one. 

runsoncoffee

I live in a rural area and deliver at a community hospital that does a lot of Amish births so the practice is very natural/low intervention focused. There are mostly midwives who take care of all regular births. I like it because I'm in a hospital still just in case (my second babe ended up in the NICU) there are doctors on call at all hours in case of an emergency, but the midwives are so good!! It's the best of both worlds for me.

sunshine525

I've had two midwife births and one OB birth (all in a hospital). I'm considering staying 150 miles away from home the last month of pregnancy to use my midwife again. ha! With the midwife everything was calm and relaxed. She and my doula were with me the whole time, it was perfect. The OB experience was complete opposite, she sprung things on me that I didn't appreciate and she was only there for pushing. 

quinniebear

@sunshine525 would you recommend using a doula? I'm strongly considering it (FTM). Not sure if it's worth the added expense would be about $900

mamanbebe

@quinniebear Just popping in to say you could also look into student doulas in your area, they tend to have a lower cap fee (some are free during training) and you typically get the same services with supervision from a professional doula. 

sunshine525

quinniebear said:

@sunshine525 would you recommend using a doula? I'm strongly considering it (FTM). Not sure if it's worth the added expense would be about $900

Does your insurance pay for any of that? My doula was a friend through church, I think she was about 1/3 of that!  She was so worth it though. We moved between baby two and three, so I didn’t have her with the third labor, but I could still hear her voice in my head telling me to breathe and relax my shoulders, etc.