IF Treatment and Testing- Week of 10/8

beachbunnyxo123

This is a place for those of us who have already started TTC, but have started infertility testing and/or treatments. You can express your thoughts, feelings, and frustrations on infertility. TTC can be a long journey naturally, then add in the difficulties associated with infertility, and it becomes a whole new ball game. The road to infertility can be lonely, frustrating, and complicated, so let's make this a place where we can vent, ask questions, and support one another. Feel free to resurrect this thread at any point in the week if you have something to say. Treat this as an ongoing conversation. 


Diagnosis (if you've been): 

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA):

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): 

How are things going?: 

Any questions?:

GTKY: What is your favorite place you’ve ever vacationed? 

beachbunnyxo123

Diagnosis (if you've been): unexplained 

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WFFET 

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): 
Endometrial biopsy on Thursday, FET date scheduled for 11/21! 

How are things going?: 
Good! I have my biopsy/scratch on Thursday and looking forward to getting it over with. I’m on BCPs until my transfer. Excited it’s getting close!

Any questions?:
Nope 

GTKY: What is your favorite place you’ve ever vacationed? 
we went to st Lucia on our honeymoon and had a two store villa with our own private pool and a butler and it was straight paradise!! Would love to do it again! 

crookshanks10

@beachbunnyxo123 11/21 will be here before you know it!! So excited for you. Your honeymoon sounds like it was amazing! I would love to go to St. Lucia at some point!

Diagnosis (if you've been): LP defect

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): TWW 3dpo

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): IUI #2 was last Friday

How are things going?: Good. Not temping this cycle and it's so nice to have the mental break. I'm spotting from the procedure but hopefully that'll stop soon.

Any questions?: N/A

GTKY: What is your favorite place you’ve ever vacationed? I really loved Half Moon Cay in the Bahamas and Aruba, where we honeymooned  (:

emmasemm

@beachbunnyxo123 scratch means one step closer to transfer!!!

Diagnosis (if you've been): DOR AMA Autoimmune rubbish on top

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WFAF (Which is still over a week away but still waiting...)

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): We did IVF#7 and got the call on Saturday to say we have 2 more beautiful great quality embryos frozen! I’m now priming ready for round #8. 

How are things going?: 
It was nerve wracking last week after “only” getting 3 eggs, we then get a call late in the afternoon to say DHs sperm hadn’t come through the wash looking great, all normal parameters were fine but just weren’t looking good under the microscope. So we did a last minute switch to ICSI. The next morning we got the call to say one fertilized but was a very very strange shape, and the other two fertilized normally. Good news was all three were mature, which is really the challenge for me to get the follicles to sync up and yield mature eggs at the same time. Then the two days until our call on Saturday morning to say both not only made it to freeze but were really top quality was tough but a good result in the end.
I say “only” 3 eggs because just over a year ago when we did our first IVF cycle we were not getting necessarily that many eggs and definitely not that many mature - we typically only got one mature at a time. So actually having 3 mature eggs at once is great progress. 
This has also led us to discuss with the embryologist that probably the biggest factor in our last two cycles was using the micro dose Lupron protocol. Whilst it can yield a higher rate of empty follicles, it can for DOR AMA ladies help. So I’m really glad I advocated for this protocol.
So now it’s WFAF and hoping for another good baseline to try and get ER somewhere at the end of the month before we start stepping into the unknown of preparing my body for transfer. 

Any questions?:

GTKY: What is your favorite place you’ve ever vacationed? 
Definitely the Cali/Nevada/Arizona road trip DH and I did. We had mountains and forests, deserts and beaches, rural and city, sophisticated and crazy all in one vacation. 

LJMoon6

@beachbunnyxo123 We went to St Lucia for our honeymoon too! It was really gorgeous. But I was very sad to learn how poor the local population is.

@crookshanks10 What timing did you end up going with for the trigger and IUI? I’m glad you’re taking a break from temping, it can me so stressful. Put the thermometer down!

@emmasemm That’s wonderful news! I’m so glad you guys decided to do 2 more rounds of IVF. It sounds like you got the perfect protocol for you.

 

Diagnosis (if you've been): Unexplained

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WTO

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): Frist RE appointment this week

How are things going?: I’m excited and nervous about our appointment coming up. I just want answers!

I’m thinking about telling my boss that we’re starting fertility treatment. I anticipate that there will be a lot of appointments coming up and I don’t want to keep being evasive. I have no idea if this is a wonderful or terrible idea. I think he would be understanding, I work in academia. But I could also see it backfiring since I would in a lab. Most daily tasks that I do now I likely won’t be able to do once I’m KU.

Any questions?: How many of you ladies have told your boss about your fertility treatment?

GTKY: What is your favorite place you’ve ever vacationed? Oh man, there are so many! My heart is stuck in Europe. The very first time I was ever on a plane was for a high school trip to France. It is my life goal to live in Europe one day. I also really love Costa Rica. It was so beautiful and so many adventurous activities. New Zealand was also surprisingly amazing. Kiwis are so nice and the love they have for nature was seen everywhere you went.

crookshanks10

@LJMoon6 When I spoke to my RE he explained that with IVF they use the trigger shot and do the egg retrieval around 36 hours after and that 99.9% of the time the eggs are still there, so that was enough to convince me that I just needed to follow their timeline. I did do an OPK this time before the trigger just to make sure I hadn't started surging yet which I hadn't, so FX! I'm so glad you get to meet an RE this week!

So I did tell my bosses about my fertility treatment. I started with the one who oversees me just as a heads up as to why I was constantly taking PTO. A couple weeks ago, I told my directors because my first IUI fell on a weekend, so that worked out, but last week I had to take 1 1/2 days off so I figured it'd be best to tell them why and so that they would know for future reasons if I still needed more time off. It's hard to know what's right but they've all been supportive. 

Avrilmai

@beachbunnyxo123 I'm so excited for you. GL on Thurs!
@crookshanks10 we honeymooned in Aruba too! it was such a friendly, relaxing place. FX for you. 
@emmasemm 2 more is awesome! If you don't mind me asking, how many do you have banked now? Your and beachbunny's experiences with MDL have given me a lot of hope for this cycle. FX that your next one gives you even better results. 
@LJMoon6 I told my boss when we started IVF because of the multiple appointments and the need to request a day off sort of at the last minute. She was very understanding and shared that she too had done IVF. So, for me, it was a positive experience. With the IUIs I just said I had a medical appointment and may be in a little late. My RE's office does what they can to get you in early/before work if needed. GL with the first RE appointment. 

Diagnosis (if you've been): offically Unexplained, but low AMH and AMA

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): IVF 

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): started the lupron on sunday for the MDL and will start stims tomorrow. 

How are things going?: so far so good. baseline went well, no issues, blood work looked good. Adjusting to getting up a bit earlier to do morning injections. This protocol has AM and PM injections. 

Any questions?: any side effects from the lo dose lupron I should be on the look out for? 

GTKY: What is your favorite place you’ve ever vacationed? this is such a hard question, but the place DH and I always talk about going back to is New Zealand. It was just such a beautiful place and we only got to see a few places. 

suzycupcake

Diagnosis (if you've been): ovary adhesions.......

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): Nothing now.

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): Nothing

How are things going?: Gonna post and go today. PGS came back today and apparently, we did not make any normal embryos. All 7 of them are aneuploid. Waiting for coordinator to send the Cooper Genetics report. I don't know what to say, how to think, or how to feel about this but last night, I cried my eyes out over all of the time, cost, pain, and heartache. How most other women get to experience pleasure and sex with their partner, and get a baby at the end. 

Maybe this isn't the end, but I sure feel like it is. Right now, I'm just done. I'm sooooo done.

Any questions?:

GTKY: What is your favorite place you’ve ever vacationed? 

crookshanks10

@suzycupcake I’m so sorry friend. I am thinking of you during this difficult time. Be kind to yourself and take all the time you need to process. We’ll be here for you.

emmasemm

@crookshanks10 For a long long time I needed to track everything every month to feel I had control and information is power for me. However I also reached a point in treatments where I felt like I had to let go of that. Just do what’s right for you.

@ljmoon6 whether to tell your bosses or not really depends on both your relationship with them and their attitude to this kind of thing.
I personally have not said anything as I’m in a very very male dominated world, where I have several times been told they only consider me for promotion because I don’t have kids and how lucky they are to have a woman to promote who doesn’t have kids as they can “do their bit” to make the female management quota... 
I do sometimes wonder what they think I’m doing, as after 7 IVF rounds, including 4 overseas, I mean they must notice that two weeks every month I come into work late and then take a day off for a medical “procedure” which I have to fly for... I mean if one of my team was doing that I would know, but I don’t think they have a clue. Also my team tell me far too much of their medical issues so I do not think any would be shy about it! 

@avrilmai we have 7 embryos frozen now, but 3 are poor quality and all are frozen day 3, of course also none with genetic testing. Just trying to increase the chances of getting a euploid one, which since I am 40 is not so easy. 
I really really hope MDL works well for you. If you remember that was also the secret for @kiwi2628. What were your estrogen and FSH at baseline this time?

@suzycupcake oh I’m so sorry. First, this can happen for so many reasons. I think first of all is to get that report and check there was nothing systematic they found and to see if they will re-run to double check it was not just an error.  I have other ideas but you probably need to be angry and sad right now, so just reach out if you need any support.

Avrilmai

@suzycupcake I’m so sorry to read this. It is totally understandable to cry and feel sad and defeated. You’re allowed to feel all of the feelings that come with grief and disappointment. Lean on your husband, your friends, your supports. Now is the time to be the one that needs the support, so take it. You don’t have to have the answers today. In fact now is not the moment to make any big decisions. Take some time. Process it. IF sucks. 

Avrilmai

@emmasemm that makes total sense to me. I’m just so happy to hear that you’re getting good quality eggs now. I’m so hoping that you find/already have that golden egg. 
AFM, my estrogen at baseline was 18. They don’t check FSH, but LH was <0.2 at baseline and AFC was around 10. I’m hoping to get about half of that in mature eggs. We would really like to have at least 2 more embryos. 

emmasemm

@avrilmai oh that sounds like a great baseline! Keeping everything crossed!

rikiteacup

@suzycupcake I am so sorry. Hugs and positive vibes.

jrm_14

@suzycupcake There isn't a right thing to feel or say or think.  Wishing you answers in the upcoming appointments. 

@beachbunnyxo123 Woohoo for your upcoming transfer & related excitement!  That honeymoon sounds of what dreams made.

@crookshanks10 Taking a break from things such as temping can be such a mental relief- to have your team monitoring so you do not need to do so.  Hoping your TWW goes by quickly.

@emmasemm I love your GTKY is in the US and the rest of ours are away from here   Traveling/living abroad did teach me how to appreciate my own country's beauty, though.  What a rollercoaster this last cycle (and this last year).  It is always comforting to see your self advocacy "pay off" like it has with that protocol.  I have no doubt you'll approach the unknown territory with as much vigor as these retrials. 

@LJmoon6 It is such as difficult decision to disclose fertility treatments to work.  However, they move your work assignments based on your future fertility plans (Pregnancy Discrimination Act covers IF, I believe.  ADA does cover reproduction as it is a major life activity).  (But if they do & providing that is another issue).  I hope you are at peace with whatever you decide. 

@avrilmai New Zealand is on my bucklist.  Hopefully this cycle continues to go smoothly for you. 

Avrilmai

@jrm_14 I was just thinking about you. I hope you’re well, or as well as can be at this point. 

jrm_14

@avrilmai Thanks I came to post, though ran out of steam once I made it through responses.  Holding still at the moment, waiting for my body to return to baseline. 

zamoraspin

@beachbunnyxo123 I hope the biopsy/scratch goes smoothly and the pain isn't too bad. 
@crookshanks10 Fx for you. I hope the spotting stops and this is your cycle. 
@emmasemm So glad you have two more great quality embryos banked! I hope this cycle gets you some more. You are amazing in your knowledge and advocacy for yourself. 
@LJMoon6 It's a tough decision - whether or not to be open with work. I told the senior folks I work with enough about going on that they knew we were doing an ER cycle. For me it was the right decision. I was met with compassion. I was glad because I ended up taking a couple more days off of work than expected because my ER recovery was not very linear (worst pain day for me was 4 days after the ER). 
@avrilmai I'm sorry for the twice a day injections but am hoping so hard this is the protocol that will get you the embryos you are wanting. Sending positive thoughts your way. 
@suzycupcake I'm so sorry. I can imagine how heartbroken you and YH are right now. This is definitely not the result I would have expected for you. Take some time to be angry and sad and be taken care of. 

I have family visiting so I'm a bit MIA but hoping everyone has a good week.

purplg8r

@beachbunnyxo123 oh I’m so jealous of your honeymoon!!!  That sounds amazing!!

@crookshanks10 FX this IUI was it for you!

@emmasemm yes!! That’s great news!  And you are seriously superwoman for doing all these ERs back to back!

@LJMoon6 it feels so good to take the next step!  I told my boss because I knew I’d be a little late to school (just enough to need someone to cover my class a little for me but not take a whole day off)

@Avrilmai I have no idea if mine is low dose or not (5mg) but I tend to get a tiny rash around the injection site for about 10 minutes

@suzycupcake I’m so sorry. You have every right for feeling the way you do. Hopefully your RE will have some answers for you.  Make sure to take care of yourself 

Diagnosis (if you've been): AMA, mild pcos 

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WFFET maybe

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?):  maybe FET

How are things going?:  they’re not. Lining today was only 6.7, although my estrogen more than doubled. I thought for sure that they’d cancel it but they’re having me come back in on Wednesday. (I’m not too hopeful. My lining only increased .2 in 4 days.  Not sure it will increase much in 2 days)

Any questions?:

GTKY: What is your favorite place you’ve ever vacationed? Ooohhhhh. This is so hard!  I think I’ll pick Tokyo.  I loved the Disney parks there and I loved touring the city. The culture is amazing!

suzycupcake

Thanks friends Wine is plentiful right now and we are just doing what we can to protect our hearts right now. 

@purplg8r I'm so sorry this is happening. Can they do a prolonged priming with a natural injectable estrogen? It's so frustrating when things don't go as planned. I hope Wednesday brings you better news. 

Sparty18

@beachbunnyxo123 Ah, that's all coming up so fast!!

@crookshanks10 Glad you put the thermometer away, good job!  

@emmasemm So hopeful for you and glad you pushed for a protocol you felt strongly about.

@LJMoon6 Good luck with your RE appt!  I have not told my boss about treatment, but I am also able to do all of my appointments first thing in the morning as they have all morning monitoring, IUIs, etc... come in between 6:30-7:30.  Not sure what your RE's hours are and what time you have to go to work, but it could be possible to keep it quiet for a bit.

@Avrilmai I want to go back to New Zealand too - did you go to Queenstown?

@suzycupcake EFF. I'm so, so sorry.  

@purplg8r I'm sorry your lining is standing in your way.  I hope you end up being pleasantly surprised tomorrow.

Diagnosis (if you've been): Nothing official

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WTO

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): Natural cycle with IUI.  Couldn't do Clomid this cycle as my lining was never thin enough.

How are things going?: Meh.  When I don't let myself think about what will come next, I'm doing ok.  I'm actually feeling a bit of a sense of relief not doing Clomid this cycle and I'm happy that my body has finally proven to the RE what I've been trying to tell them about my early ovulation.  

Any questions?:  I'm sure I'll have plenty in the coming months, but in the meantime we'll be reading all we can on going to injectables next vs going right to IVF.  We have an appt to discuss next steps with our current RE on 10/24 and the consult with the new RE on 10/30... so it will be good to get two opinions on what the next best step is for us.  We plan to do at least a couple of natural IUI rounds before making a decision.  Any thoughts or insight is always appreciated for anyone else who has faced a decision between injectables and IVF.

GTKY: What is your favorite place you’ve ever vacationed?  Oh man.  I looooved Queenstown, New Zealand.  I would probably say that is my favorite except I was there with my ex, so it is a bit tainted haha.  Hopefully my H and I can go back there together.  My H and I honeymooned in Hawaii for two weeks in Maui & Kauai and I would definitely go back there in a heartbeat.

suzycupcake

@Sparty18 Thought stopping is a very effective anxiety management technique. As far as insight being faced with that kind of a decision, I'm here to tell you that there really isn't any. You just have to do what you think is best for you guys based on the information being given to you. What I can say is that if it were me, I'd probably think that if they were missing O by not listening to me, I probably wasn't getting a fair chance, however, it also seems like there's always that one thing that kept me from moving on to IVF. 

I came on here and asked a similar question and didn't understand why other ladies were so hell bent on going straight to IVF, but now I get it. Again, it's really such a personal decision. Just know that no matter what you decide, you are doing the best that you can do. Whatever less than ideal outcome that might result, is SO not your fault. IF is just the shittiest of shit cans. Hugs   

purplg8r

@suzycupcake I’m not sure what protocol that is!

@Sparty18 oh I would love to go to New Zealand!!

Avrilmai

@Sparty18 we did go to Queenstown. We took a bus from Christchurch to Queenstown so we got to see a bit more of the South Island and I'd love to go back and spend some more time on the South Island. We went bungy jumping in Queenstown. Did you do any of the "adventure" things there? I really hope the consult with the new RE can help give you some direction either to move forward with someone new or to stick with the current RE. 

@purplg8r GL today. I hope it is good news. 

nitnat007

@beachbunnyxo123 FX for tomorrow! So glad that you have a FET date now. Eeek! So excited for you that you can actually put it on the calendar now. It will be here before you know it. 

@crookshanks10 How are you holding up? Rooting for you!

@emmasemm That is fantastic! So glad that you have two more banked. It is so great that you have been able to find that right dose that works for you and get some decent follicles with it. 

@LJMoon6 As of now I am not sharing our IVF journey with work. I am fortunate enough to work within walking distance from our clinic and have fairly flexible hours. It is more the full days off for retrieval and transfer that I was concerned about. The biggest thing that stopped me was that I did not want to deal with questions on whether or not it worked. Especially if it didn't. I think I am just going to let them know that I have a medical issue that needs to be taken care of. If I have to, I will use vacation days to cover it. Did you decide what you were going to do?

@Avrilmai How are stims going so far? Are you doing injections yourself? Hope you are doing well. Rooting for those mature follicles for you. 

@suzycupcake Just sending you all the love. My heart still breaks for you. 

@jrm_14 Sending you hugs friend! Take care of yourself. 

@purplg8r Hoping for good news for you today and that you are not going to have to cancel this cycle. Let us know how it goes. 

@Sparty18 Girl, I am so glad that you were able to prove your case to your RE. I know it is a little late and wish that they had just listened to you sooner. But hopefully they will be able to figure out something that works for you now that they know what they are dealing with. The end of the month is right around the corner! Lots on the go for you. 

Diagnosis (if you've been): AMA, MIF (Acrosome defect)

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): TWW

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): Waiting for Oct 20th to start Sprefact. Nov 1st stims

How are things going?: Doing good. I just stopped by the clinic and made our payment for IVF and picked up my first batch of meds. I also picked up a drug list so that I can figure out what is covered under which policy (I am on my own and also MH's). I am hoping that we will be able to save a little extra between them on meds. 

Any questions?:

GTKY: What is your favorite place you’ve ever vacationed? We had an amazing trip down in New Hampshire over the holidays. But I think it was one of those "the people made it" situations. Family time was much needed. Otherwise we sailed around Cuba and found some amazing deserted little islands. Costa Rica will always hold a special place in my heart too. 

Sparty18

@suzycupcake Thank you 

@Avrilmai We did a few adventure things there - we went skydiving, did the Shotover canyon swing (sorta like bungy jumping - you jump off a high platform over a canyon and then the line catches you at the bottom and you swing over the river), and the jet boat.  I fell in love with that place, it felt like a fantasy land.  

LJMoon6

@crookshanks10 I’m glad your RE was able to calm your nerves a little bit. And that’s a good idea about taking an OPK before the trigger. I have my FX for you!! I think my supervisor would be supportive of me. I mean, I’m at the age when people start having kids. He had to of known before he hired me that this would be a possibility.

@avrilmai I’m thinking I might be jumping the gun with telling my boss. I think I could wait a while longer and just see how things go. I already switched around my schedule so that I can have Friday off for my appointment and my boss didn’t even blink an eye. I start work at 6:45am so I don’t think going in early to avoid taking off would be an option lol. But maybe I wouldn’t have to take off as much time as I was thinking. I was only in Christchurch for a couple of days on my way down to Antarctica but what I did get to see of NZ was amazing. I’ve been wanting to get back there ever since just to go to Queenstown. I’m so jealous!

@suzycupcake I’m so sorry friend. Take all the time you need and just know we’re here for you when you’re ready. I hope the RE will have some insight on this and what you should do next.

@emmasemm Oh your work story scares me! I too work in a male dominated career. I am the only girl in my department (besides 2 ladies in admin). I honestly don’t mind because I get along better with men than I do women anyways lol. I don’t think I was hired because I am female and can help meet their quota, I think I was hired because I am young and can be molded to what they want/need… I’m not surprised that your colleagues haven’t figured it out. Men can be so oblivious to things. I wonder what they think is going on lol.

@jrm_14 Thanks you. You made me realize that I don’t want to miss out on work opportunities just because I might someday get KU. What if I never do and then I don’t have a great career because they assumed I would. I definitely think I’m leaning more towards keeping it quiet. Although I have told a couple colleagues.

@zamora_spin I’m glad that being open was the right choice for you. I’m leaning more towards keeping it quiet now. I don’t think my boss would actually really care. He’s a couple years away from retiring anyways so he’s got the “I don’t give an F**” mentality.

@purplg8r How was your appointment today?

@sparty18 I think I’ll try to get my appointments in first thing in the morning too, but I do start work at 6:45 so I will have to be a little late no matter what. Oh well. I think I’m going to keep it quiet for as long as possible. But if I get asked directly what’s going on then I have to be honest with them. I’m sorry about your continuing RE problems. Hopefully now they finally understand what’s going on and you can get a better action plan in place.

 @nitnat007 That’s so nice that your clinic is right by your work. I’m jealous! I’m leaning towards keeping it quiet for now. I will see how many weird looks or question I get from work first. If they start asking questions then I’ll be honest with them. That’s so exciting that you have a start date set!

Avrilmai

@nitnat007 my DH does all of my injections. I have a thing about needles, but I actually really think i could do it this time around if I had to. But, he also does all of them so he gets to be involved and part of the process. I hope things work out and you have some med coverage. 
@LJMoon6 I completely understand waiting to tell; I did until I couldn't wait. Actually at first I just said I would need a day off and I was unsure of when it would be. My boss simply asked if it was for medical reasons. I said yes and she said. okay. She then added that if I needed or wanted to talk she was open to listening. There was just something about the way she said it. I kind of had the feeling she had been through the same thing. It is such a personal thing and whatever happens I hope this is only a positive experience for you and there is no negative feedback. 
@Sparty18 we did the jet boat too! 

blackhottamales

**lurking to say hi**

@suzycupcake I am so sorry to hear this.  My heart goes out to you.   I agree, no rushed decisions even though it may feel like the end of a road right now.  Please take all the time you need and know that we are hear if and when you want to reach out. 

@emmasemm you are wonder woman, wonderful results!

@Avrilmai sounds like things are going well, i'm excited to keep reading the updates

@jrm_14


@purplg8r i'm glad there is still a change but sorry you don't have a true answer yet.  

@nitnat007 that's exciting to get started with the meds for IVF, one step closer.  

purplg8r

@nitnat007 I’m double covered on insurance too. It gets crazy!! 

so they cancelled me.  My RE was the one who did the scan today and I’m so glad she was.  She said my lining was up to 7 but didn’t have the trilaminar pattern as well any more. She wanted to wait to check my estrogen levels before she cancelled for sure but they dropped so she cancelled it.  She spent a lot of time answering questions I have.  I start progesterone tomorrow for 10 days and wait for AF.  Then I have to take a cycle off. When I expressed concerns about how long my cycle can take and wanting get a transfer in before the end of the year, she said they’d automatically put me on progesterone on cd16 for 10 days and then once AF came we’d start an estrogen only cycle (pills, suppositories, patches and/or injections)—no bcp or Lupron. So it looks like I’ll start meds again at the end of November for a December transfer.  I was resigned to waiting when I was in the office but then I got to the store and got angry and bought all the fucking carbs.  I keep trying to tell myself that I need to do what’s best for a positive outcome.  I’ll have to stay on H’s insurance for another year and we’ll just have to deal with it. 

suzycupcake

Awww @purplg8r I'm so sorry. Lots of hugs. 

charmedlifex3

Can I come join?
Intro - (I'll put a few things in spoilers) 
Spoilers- Previous pregnancy mentioned

I have a two year old son and I was very very sick through his pregnancy. I went into unexplained pre-term labor with him a few times, and they were able to stop it. I had a difficult, traumatic birth, which left me with residual health issues. 

After all that, my health continued to deteriorate. I lost all vision, in both eyes in episodes. I eventually permanently lost splotches of vision. A bevy of testing later, the verdict was Lupus, with lupus anticoagulant antibodies.  Which can make it more difficult to get and stay pregnant, and lead to pre-term labor. Ah. 
We started TTC in January. My levels right now are pretty low, and the interventions needed during pregnancy would be reasonable. If my levels raise significantly, pregnancy would be counter-indicated.  Since January I have had four cycles in ten months. Trying to work through if this is autoimmune or the trauma. 
 

Diagnosis (if you've been): Lupus with lupus anticoagulant antibodies 

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WTO - technically benched until the results of my tests, but those will be back before O. Did the blood work yesterday

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): Three month retest of the Lupus anticoagulant antibodies. If my levels are the same or only slightly higher still a green light, and likely a green light 

How are things going?:  Honestly - super stressed over the bloodwork. It's kind of a do or die situation for my future fertility, and for how LONG I have to try to make this work. 

As hard as the pregnancy was, this TTC stress is a whole new (and not fun) world. 

Any questions?: Hoping you all don't mind me hanging out here - I know my issue is a little different

GTKY: What is your favorite place you’ve ever vacationed? Disney world! We went there for our honeymoon. SO much fun as just adults. 

emmasemm

@purplg8r oh I’m so so sorry. Eat all the carbs for a few days if you need to.
Just as a hint you might want to reach out to @jamieh2000 on the low AMH thread on the IF board. She had the most crazy struggle to get her lining right but her RE (Dr Allison Rogers) basically used every trick in the book to get it right. Sounds like yours is going down the right path though to be honest.
Also in case you are just one of those people for whom FET protocols don’t think about a mini stim retrieval protocol, or even more like an IUI with injectibles but without the IUI... as most people get a good lining on low doses of stims with trigger (and you get the boost of natural progesterone so your body is ready for all the extra...). Just throwing ideas as I’m sure you’re ready to punch something right now.

@whatsbumpinpumpkin welcome but sorry you’re here. I’m also positive for the antibodies but I don’t have lupus (just some very weird exotic variant of RA). Have you had all the normal basic fertility tests? Day 3 FSH, E2 and AFC? AMH? Day 21 progesterone check? Do they know why your cycles are irregular? (I have fully regular cycles and was told that’s normal for most autoimmune conditions, that they typically are seen to reduce Ovarian reserve and/or to reduce implantation rates) 
PS please also feel free to jump in and give support to others. You don’t need specific knowledge just buckets of empathy :-) 

charmedlifex3

@emmasemm I sure will! I just didn't want to barge in with comments right off and say something to hurt someone. I am waiting on some blood work now, and feeling super jittery about it, so I understand how delicate this process can make you emotions. I'm sorry you are dealing with an autoimmune as well, and have the same antibodies. It's a bit terrifying - but better to know.
And no, they haven't done the fertility testing

I had one suscessful pregnancy, not that long ago, my son is two, 

so I think they are hesitant to say there is something "wrong" with my ability to conceive just yet, given my history. 
 The doctor wants to get the lupus angle under control first, hook me up with a good MFM second, and then move into a fertility specialist if needed at that point. There may be some secondary infertility from trauma, but there is so much else going on which is a "before you even get pregnant..." but those tests should be back early next week. I think the hope from everyone (myself included!) is getting the obvious autoimmune issue under control will stop my body from freaking out, and get every thing else to return to normal. 
I had an OB suggest my husband should just get a vasectomy. Completely callous. If can't have a baby, we can't... but all the other specialist so far have given the green light pending a retest on my antibodies to track the progression. Fingers crossed for slow or none! My levels were relatively low, so praying they are still low, and not ticking up quickly. 
All of this kind of hit the fan right as we started TTC in January.  

@suzycupcake That sounds heartbreaking. I hope you are able to find a way to soothe your heart in this time  
@Sparty18 I can't even imagine skydiving. On one hand it sounds like a GREAT experience, but I feel like I would absolutely freak out, lol. 
@LJMoon6 That is the one good thing about my issue being what it is... it's Lupus. No one questions you going to the doctor for lupus. Is there a way to tell your boss you have a personal medical condition which requires treatment - don't worry, it's not serious, but I will need some time off? I don't think legally they can require you to disclose the diagnosis. 
@Avrilmai I don't have a thing about needles, but my DH does. Eek, lol!
@emmasemm I also work in a very very male dominated world. I have a little more flexibility since I recently changed jobs, but my last job was on a big office park type of floor and there was never anyone else in the ladies room. It was weird to run into someone else.... That's a sign!
@purplg8r Carbs can't fix everything but they sure make it easier to cope with. What's your favorite? Mine are tiny pretzels. Usually then dipped in something ridiculous. 

tamalahoops

@whatsbumpinpumpkin welcome! We love you, you belong here and we want to hear your story and support you through this journey. BUT

 Please stop talking about how easy it was for you to get pregnant. you've said it 3 times. We get it. 

But please stay! This is the best board in the internet and all the lovely ladies here want to be here for you!

charmedlifex3

Edited so as not to hurt anyone else! 

suzycupcake

Welcome @whatsbumpinpumpkin! I'm sorry you find yourself here. Another autoimmune sister; me with MS. That was completely insensitive for a Doctor to say such a thing to you after taking an oath to do no harm. Glad he/she was a 'had' rather than a 'have'. 

purplg8r

@suzycupcake thanks!!

@emmasemm I will reach out to her!  Thank you! (I do want to punch something!).  So I went back and looked at my lining during my TIs and IUIs.  TI-7.1 IUIs—7.7, 5.87, 5.4 so somehow they got worse???  I do remember thought during one of my monitoring appts for stims, my lining was in the low 7s and I remarked how it never got that high so maybe that is what I need! (Although My progesterone is always low and I’ve always had to take suppositories).  Thank you so much for those suggestions. Adding it to my notes for when I go in at the end of the month. 

@whatsbumpinpumpkin sorry you have to be here but welcome! My fav carbs are any savory flavored popcorn and chips & dip!

Sparty18

Update for me - I had a blazing OPK last night and went in this morning.  My follies that were 12 and 15 on CD5 were 17 and 27 today (CD11).  Triggered and had the first IUI today, back again for another tomorrow.  The RE believes both will release.  I'm glad I still have two follies without Clomid, but I'm a little bummed that they are on the small and large side.  I'm still much more hopeful than the past two cycles.  

wabash15

Just in case this info is helpful for the crowd/lurkers...
@purplg8r My lining always tended to be thin (5 or less) with out estrogen supplementation. I also think for IUI/TI RE's are OK with a much thinner lining than for IVF/FET. my lining even with treatment was never thicker than 6.5 and both of my RE's were happy with those numbers.  I'm so sorry your cycle was canceled. Hugs and love.

@rallykat14 I hope your hanging in there during your TWW. I'm rooting like hell for you.

I am rooting for all my IF ladies.

crookshanks10

@Sparty18 That's good news! Fx for you!!