3rd Trimester Check-in w/o July 2nd

2MomsHoping

Hi ladies happy Monday! 

This is a weekly check in for the mamas who have made it to the 3rd trimester!!! If you are in week 28 or past, feel free to join in on the weekly fun. 

• How far along? EDD?
• How is everyone feeling this week? 
• Any upcoming appointments? 
• GTKY:  What are you doing for 4th of July?
• As always feel free to share pictures of your bump, nurseries, baby gear, and of course those babies when they arrive!

If you're just joining us please post a: 

• Mini synopsis in your first post with your EDD
• How many babies you are pregnant with
• If you know the gender(s)
• How you have been feeling in your 3rd tri
• Any upcoming or recent appointments you may have

 Please let me know if you need to be added to the list below:

@jr102217 EDD 7/15 team green…In L/D…best wishes @jr102217
@cseley321 EDD 7/22 with a little girl
@safire3 EDD 7/23 with a little boy
@Irisheyes81 EDD 8/4 with a little girl
@2MomsHoping EDD 8/12 team green
@laurad75 EDD 8/20 with a little boy
@sarcasticowl EDD 8/23 with a little girl
@lablover78 EDD 9/1 with a little boy
@hottietoddie EDD 9/5 with a little boy
@gfgrump EDD 9/6 with a little boy
@BusinessWife EDD 9/9 team green
@sarzee2 EDD 9/10 team green
@adirat EDD 9/15 with a little boy

adirat

Thanks for adding me @2momshoping! Still amazed to be here!

• Mini synopsis in your first post with your EDD -- due Sept 16 with my first baby from ivf. (tw) history of loss and infertility like many of us. 
• How many babies you are pregnant with -- 1 baby boy!
• How you have been feeling in your 3rd tri -- Feeling okay now...since I had HG until 25 weeks I am still grateful not to be vomiting anymore! 
• Any upcoming or recent appointments you may have -- I just had an ultrasound last week to check on a partial placenta previa which has totally resolved, woohoo! I'm also looking for a doula with a goal of a low intervention hospital birth. 

2MomsHoping

Hi ladies happy Monday! 

This is a weekly check in for the mamas who have made it to the 3rd trimester!!! If you are in week 28 or past, feel free to join in on the weekly fun. 

• How far along? EDD? 34w1d, 8/12
• How is everyone feeling this week? I’m so over it.  I’m grumpy my heartburn has over taken the zantac power and basically I’m just uncomfortable (why is turning over in bed is like an extreme workout all of a sudden).  I’m stressing over getting things to get done.  DW seriously messed up her shoulder this weekend while hanging some blinds and now neither of us can lift much, though I still think I can but only can do it while DW is not looking   All I want to do is stay home, organize everything and finish decorating the baby’s room and decluttering the rest of the house.  I would love to take a couple days off of work but I have as of last week been put on two major projects…I’m like wtf really?!? I want to try to wrap up what I already have open and spend some time prepping people to cover my stuff.  I have the feeling they expect me to work from home all through my maternity leave while receiving no pay.  Yeah…no.  Line in the sand for that one.  I’m just frustrated because if it all falls apart it will reflect badly on me but I’m already pulling 10-12 hour days all last week and it looks like this week as well and physically it is impossible to keep up this schedule AND that’s not touching on training/preparations for when I’m away.  I really don’t know why I put up with this kind of stuff.  Wish my old therapist was still around I definitely need a refresher on work boundaries…I’m definitely feeling like a doormat, logically I know no one in their right mind would put up with this.   Sorry for the rant, I’m just so frustrated.
• Any upcoming appointments? Nope
• GTKY:  What are you doing for 4th of July?  Ugh I know I should come in and work, but I have such a bad attitude I’m not going to.  This will really will only make for a worse rest of the week for me and make it bitter that I’m burning 8hrs of vacation time while still clocking way more than 40 hours for the week….sorry I’m really stopping with the b*tching now.  I’m hoping DW do some work on the nursery mural, and I think I’ll tackle some of my organizing to-dos cleaning a cluttered closet is good therapy for me and I have plenty of clutter to purge.

safire3

@jr102217 best of luck to you and I hope you are already busy snuggling your little one!

@adirat yay so happy to have you here!

@2MomsHoping please take it easy. That work schedule is impossible to maintain at this point in your pregnancy. Your body needs rest! Although I have a chronic illness I was trying to do it all as well until everything came crashing down and I had to take a step back. I had to stop work unexpectedly and I’m still having to take it easy at home. Remember baby won’t care if everything isn’t perfect before he/she comes. Also definitely hell no to working from home with no pay when baby is here. They will work you to the bone with no remorse and if something happens to you, work goes on and you are replaced. Please put yourself first!

• How far along? EDD?     37 weeks today! Can’t belive I’m basically full term. Due 7/23

• How is everyone feeling this week?    Doing much better now that I stopped work but I definitely have no energy/ endurance and I have issues whenever I try to do too much. I got some new books and games on my iPad to hopefully prevent extreme boredom. DH has been talking about how rough the last few weeks have been and how we may not do this again which is really difficult for me. I know it’s selfish to be thinking of siblings when this one is not even safe in my arms yet but I know I want more. Plus we have 2 embryos frozen that I feel the need to at least give a chance at life. We are still paying off IVF debt and definitely can’t afford surrogacy so I don’t see how else we can do this. It just hurts my heart to think it may be one and done for us. 

• Any upcoming appointments? High risk tomorrow for ultrasound and NST. I have to do that weekly now. I guess they will also check my placenta previa but I have no hope that it has cleared. It’s been about 1.5cm away from the cervix for months now and we need at least 2cm to be cleared. Seems like because of this no one really knows what to do with me but they promised a decision by next week so we will see. 

• GTKY:  What are you doing for 4th of July? In-laws are coming over and DH will BBQ. Hopefully we will be able to finally use the pool as well if the rain holds up so looking forward to that. 

adirat

@2momshoping Work during your unpaid leave? Oh hell no! They're lucky for what you're pushing to do now.

@safire3 Hugs friend. It's so hard but try not to think ahead to siblings. You can keep those embryos on ice and see how your health is in another year or two or three. Maybe in three years there'll be a great sickle cell breakthrough that would be a pregnancy game changer for you! 

wabash15

Lurking**
  @safire3 give him some time... when he is holding that sweet baby and the memories of pregnancy fade a bit he may get on board. When I was pregnant with the twins I thought I would probably be done, then they were in my arms and I knew I was not done. it took a while but we got back in the saddle.  fx the next few weeks go smoothly and your not too board

safire3

Thank you @adirat. There have been some advances recently so it’s not too far fetched to think that in a few years there may be something new that can at least help me through pregnancy. The thought alone brings tears to my eyes.
Thank you @wabash15. I sure hope DH changes his tune after some time. Smooth sailing from here on out would help as well. 

You guys are awesome. This has been such a journey and I don’t think I would have made it this far without a place to vent and get some support. I love you ladies!

2MomsHoping

@safire3 I think about siblings a lot too and I think it’s natural especially if you have frosties to have hope of adding more to your family.  Since you have had the health struggles you husband is probably just scared for you to have to go through something like this again and right now that’s ok, but don’t doom yourself thinking it will be that way always. The future is unwritten for all of us. Hearts and circumstances can change, debt can be paid off, and new life can inspire new bravery.  Don’t let uncertainty bring you down. Take care of you. 

@adirat I think a doula is a great support of you are seeking a low intervention birth they can be that neutral person so slow things down when things get escalated. Especially helpful for hospital births!  If you are planning to try led free I recommend the hypnobabies class. We did it in person but I wish I did the self study instead. Lots of information and practice but I liked it. 

Everyone be proud of me I left work on time today and tomorrow I scheduled a one on one with my boss to talk about how I’m not ablw
to pull these hours anymore and force over the conversation about coverage while I’m gone. I will make it clear I will be unavailable during my leave. I just have such guilt because I love what I do and I want to make sure everything is good for our kids and families. I am lucky to have a job that means so much to me but my family needs me too and sometimes I just have to remind myself of that.   Thanks all for listening to my venting and giving me a little reality check. 

persnickity

@2MomsHoping It's really hard to have that conversation with your boss. Be proud of yourself for taking that first step! I was in the same boat before. I worked long hours and did everything, because I love what I do. My boss didn't plan for my maternity leave. No one in leadership did and I didn't force the issue. When the time came, my boss had to take my full work load on top of his. 3 weeks into maternity leave, he called me asking for help.

lablover78

@2momshoping good! As I read your first post I’m like uh-uh no way that schedule is impossible. I’ve been lucky that my hearing schedule let up but also I blocked some time in and I am so glad I did because I just don’t have the endurance- boundaries girl, you got this!

@safire3 I did have to come to terms with 1 & done b/c we’re old and couldn’t have handled another one immediately financially, physically or emotionally but like the others said with embryos and time on your side you never know what the future may hold! In the alternative, however, a client who also had IF and used a surrogate so had to accept just 1, too, started telling me about all these positive studies they’ve done with only children that I plan on researching now & made me feel happy- apparently there are a lot of benefits for the child and family.

jr102217

*waves* We did it!! I have a baby boy!

Baby Edward was born on Sun July 1 at 12:27pm. 

My water broke Saturday night ~7pm after having dinner at my parents' house. Once I was 99.99% sure my water really broke, DH and I told my family and headed home, first to get our bags, and then to the hospital. I am Group B Strep positive so OB had said to come in for antibiotics.

At L&D triage, they said I was 80% effaced and 3cm dilated and moved us to a room. My contractions were sporadic so they put me on pitocin. I think it was around 2 or 3am the contractions were getting closer together so they did a cervical check and I was 7cm, so I went ahead with the epidural. DH confused me because for months he joked how I wouldn't be able to stand the pain, but at that moment, he said seriously that I could do it without an epidural. But the pain from contractions were painful enough to make me cry so I got it. Unfortunately it took forever bc it was hitting the wrong spot on my back. When the anesthesiologist finally got it done, he tried to explain and apologize and I'm pretty sure I just wanted everyone to be quiet so I said something to that effect. LOL We rested for a couple hours and I was so close at 9.5cm by early morning.

I started pushing around 8am and they said he was +2, but he was taking forever to come out. Around 10/11, the new attending for the shift started suggesting additional interventions. I really didn't want to use forceps. We came to a point where my pushing wasn't enough and I had been pushing for 4 hours, so after going through our options, we agreed to the forceps. They wheeled me to the OR, and after several more pushes with the forceps, I heard his crying. 

Thankfully I had gotten the epidural because they just gave me more pain meds that way for the procedure in the OR. And I really needed it afterwards bc I tore up and they needed to stitch me back together. Baby had his umbilical cord wrapped around him in a way that they were impressed I had pushed that far along for him to come out without interventions. 

He's sleeping on me right now as we take a break from cluster feeding. I miss sleep but I love him more. After so many IUIs and injections and drugs and tests and procedures...just, wow. Still unbelievable that I'm a mom and DH and I made him. 

lablover78

Congrats @jr102217- amazing and so glad to hear everything is good now.

I forgot to check in- 31+2 today. Saw my OB who’s amazing but never wants to talk about anything pg related. Just politics, my job, history etc- I’m realizing I have no idea what to expect during labor. We do have an u/s with MFM on Friday- yay! 

We we usually go home (New England) for the 4th but I can’t go that far and I guilted my DH into staying here with me. We’ll just swim at a friend’s on the 4th but then we are getting out of the desert for a quick trip up north this weekend. 

laurad75

Hi gang. I’m bumping from vacation on Nantucket. It’s been great so far but I’m so uncomfortable. Congratulations @jr102217 He shares my birthday. It’s a great day. 

• How far along? EDD? 33+1 today. 8/20
• How is everyone feeling this week? Honestly, just okay. I’m the past couple of weeks my feet have swollen significantly and it makes getting around really difficult. I’m also getting this weird muscle pain in my butt which does not allow me to put weight on my right leg when it spasms. 
• Any upcoming appointments? Not for a couple of weeks. 
• GTKY:  What are you doing for 4th of July? I’m on Nantucket until Wednesday trying to not be high maintenance and staying off my feet as much as I can. 

2MomsHoping

@jr102217 so so so happy for you and welcome to the world little Edward!!!  Sounds like you made it through your delivery like a champ.  I hope you are able to get some rest to get your strength back between all those feedings.  So happy for you and your DH!

@lablover78 and @safire3 I do second the benefits of only child thing (I didn't even have a cousin until I was in college so really no kids around when I was growing up).  I'm a little biased as the only myself but I definitely benefited.  My parents had more resources to put in me which really gave me a leg up for my education and my life skills.  I do say my parents put a lot of work into making sure I wasn't spoiled they were very sensible in making sure I had chores or achievements in order to get "stuff" but they had the time to devote to that I wasn't completely entitled.  Also I'm pretty sure the "lonely-only" is a total myth.  I have developed deeper than usual friendships that I consider equivalent to siblings.  These friends even the ones that now live out of state I usually see once or twice a year and they even know and care about my parents and I know and care about theirs we even share holidays sometimes.  I have been so lucky to "choose" my siblings.  There is the downside of being an only you can't get away with ANYTHING and there is quite a bit of pressure to be "perfect" but in general it's a sweet deal.  I do worry about caring for my parents as they age and making decisions "alone" when their health declines but I think that is a difficult time regardless of if siblings are around or not. 

adirat

Congrats @jr102217! I'm so glad to hear you are doing well now! I hope your recovery from the tear is quick.

cseley321

@2momshoping So this sounded really similar to my old work situation... Long story short, I just quit.  I made really good money with them, but my husband made enough to support us and we figured the long hours that I was having to work and stress that goes along with it would not be worth it.  Currently I am working from home in a much more flexible position. It helps out some financially and keeps my mind sharper.

[Deleted User]

Congratulations @jr102217 !!!  Sounds like you were a real superhero! ❤❤❤  Enjoy those snuggles with your sweet, sweet boy.

<ul><li>How far along? EDD? 30+2 / 9.9.18</li><li>How is everyone feeling this week? </li></ul>Mostly okay.  Just getting harder to get comfortable at night, plus exhausted and wishing I could nap most days.  Heartburn is coming back, too, just for fun.
<ul><li>Any upcoming appointments?</li></ul>Just had my 30 week c/u this afternoon, first time seeing one of the actual doctors, as opposed to midwives, and I loved her!!!  So relieved that went well.  Only potential bad part is, baby is still breech.  So she prescribed me some spinning babies, and gave me a list of progressively intense options, including chiro, and accu/ moxibustion, on up to ECV if we need it at 37 weeks.  So let's hope baby decides to turn by then!   :#
<ul><li>GTKY:  What are you doing for 4th of July?</li></ul>DH and I will both be home, hanging out, grilling up all the meats, and doing things around the house.  Which will hopefully include getting the rooms finally switched around, and the nursery emptied out!

Irisheyes81

Congrats @jr102217. What a wonderful story. Welcome to the world, Edward! 

Im 35 weeks and 3 days. Feeling big! I’m still having the swelling issues but the doctor said I can still work. He has me working 6 hours per day instead of my 4 10 hour shifts. I feel like I’m trying to work 10 hours worth in 6 hours so the swelling is worse. We had an ultrasound last week and her head is measuring 95% and she’s measuring about 37.5 weeks (6.2lbs). I don’t really believe it but there is a chance she could be big. 

Regarding siblings, I couldn’t help but start talking about it with my husband and acupuncturist. My two little frozen embryos seem to just be waiting. Pregnancy is hard but I like having a sister and wouldn’t want my daughter to be all alone. I just don’t like constantly looking at the next step when I’m not done with this one. Infertility sucks. apparently people with PCOS struggle to breastfeed. I hope I can. 

I have a dr appointment Friday afternoon. I’m on weekly now because of the swelling scare. Plus I need that strep test thing. 

I’ll be resting for 4th of July but my family is coming for a bbq. Happy 4th to everyone in the USA! Hope
you are all staying cool. It’s so hot!!!

gfgrump

Hey all,
A little late to the party, the last few days have been crazy busy. Considering I'm on summer break, it's annoying to be so busy, but at least some of it has been fun stuff.
@jr102217. You sound like you managed it all super well.  I'm so glad things only progressed as far as they did and that he's out and amazing.  

AFM
30+5.  Starting to feel quite rotund.  Having mild discomfort in the upper back still and trying to make time for yoga as much as possible.  Today I went to a prenatal class, and a lot of the women in there were in their 2nd tri. So the teacher decided to make the class hard. Which I'm usually all for, but it kinda kicked my butt. Especially since I just went to the gym yesterday.  

My next appt is next Wednesday. Just a regular check up. My OB is out on maternity leave so next appt will be with her, finally.  But since I'm at a big hospital, it kind of doesn't matter for delivery.  It will be whomever is on call.

Interesting talk about siblings. We don't really have any usable embryos at this point, sadly 3 female brca+.  And I really want a girl. But I was commenting to DH tonight about how weird it is that everyone asks you what you're having and then makes assumptions. Like, oh, boy, your husband must be happy. And we're like, I mean, just want him to be healthy.  But I was talking about how in my last pregnancy, which was not IVF, after I found out it was a boy, I was a little disappointed. Like I already had a girl's name and everything. Anyway, I was saying how if I did say tell people I was little disappointed, they'd be all weird about it.  So I do sometimes say, well I hope to have a girl someday.  So then, I was telling that to my husband and he's like, so you're willing to go through another pregnancy? Which was the first indication that he really wants to do this all again.  Because he usually seems like he wants this, but also that I'm the one who has really pushed for it.  Anyway, we'll see.  My doctor tried to push us to do another round of retrievals before the transfer so we'd get younger eggs and I was like, no way, just can't go through all the again.  But I'd be open to adoption or maybe if there are advances for BRCA or something I'd use one of those. But it does make me sad to think about a kid not having siblings. I'm the youngest of 4 and being a sibling is a big part of my identity.  And I worry about a child dealing with us as we get older all on his own. But right now I just want to focus on getting to 37+ weeks and getting this baby safely out of me.

GTKY: So far no plans for 4th of july but have been doing a lot of projects around the house trying to get rid of stuff and setting up the nursery, so hopefully something around that.

Also, started sewing stuff for the baby. Damn, baby stuff is the cutest. Not the greatest pictures, but oh well.

Also, check out my before and after of my sewing space

cseley321

• How far along? EDD? 37 weeks + 3
• How is everyone feeling this week? The swelling in my legs and feet are out of control. My skin literally hurts.
• Any upcoming appointments?  Next week is my last OB and US
• GTKY:  What are you doing for 4th of July? The 4th is my sister's birthday so we always do fireworks and have a party. I am not a fan of fireworks at all, but she really loves them so whatever!

I officially have less than 2 weeks until my planned csection. I am scared about the adjustment to a newborn and toddler. I love my daughter so much and I know it's going to be a big adjustment for her as well. I am also going to be a lot more candid with myself about PPD. I am pretty sure I had it with my daughter, but I didn't want to admit it or get put on medication. However looking back, I feel awful because I spent all of that first year feeling miserable instead of being the happy mother I dreamed I would be. I guess I didn't want to appear ungrateful to have a child finally, after all that work.

My outlook this time is appearances be damned, I want to try and enjoy the newborn phase this time and if PPD rears its ugly head again, I will seek help. Also I have planned for my mom to come help me once a week or so. I think this will help to not feel so overwhelmed this time around

Irisheyes81

@gfgrump I bought very similar (if not the same!) shelves and totes from ikea and love them. I bought two because there are two closets in the nursery and they fit sooo much stuff! Looks great!
Did they test your embryos for BRCA because of a family history? I didn’t know they could test for that! 

adirat

@cseley321 Wow, just two weeks! That's amazing!

@businesswife I was just reading about the acupuncture + moxibustion for turning a breech baby and I couldn't believe that it actually works! I hope it doesn't come to that obviously, but nice to have in your back pocket. I had acupuncture + moxibustion done last year for an ankle injury I had while going to TTC acupuncture, and it's a little goofy smelling but definitely doable.

lablover78

My friend’s babe was breach and she even did that procedure in the hospital and each time she would flip right back. She tried everything. As a last resort she did a session with her hypnobirthing teacher that she still talks about and gets goosebumps- all I remember is it involved thanking different parts of her body....anyway later that night the baby flipped on her own and she got the natural birth she was hoping for. I’ll ask if there was a name for the sesssion but just wanted to pass that along! 

gfgrump

@Irisheyes81 Yeah, I thought I was past Ikea at this point in my life, but it really was the perfect solution and all for $100, so you really can't beat that.
Yes, I'm BRCA+ as is my mom and sister. We did PGS and PGD testing for BRCA on our embryos.  Part of me wishes I had never done it because it's like too much information and if I never knew I'd feel totally fine using those female embryos.  But, I am glad that we did the chromosomal testing bc otherwise it could would have meant more miscarriages and after our loss, I really was hoping to not go through that. Of course, nothing is certain, but this gave us a little more peace of mind. And then our doctor was like, well, if you're doing the chromosomal, you should do the genetic testing, so we did. But it's kind of like after I found out I was BRCA+ at 29, you can never not know that info and you just have that information with you at all times. Anyway, right now I'm focusing on this pregnancy but I'll likely have prophylactic surgery at some point.  Sorry, more answer than you were probably hoping for.

@2MomsHoping been thinking about you. Hope you got some rest today.  I think sometimes when you care about your work its harder to set boundaries. I've been helping our new principal with hiring this summer and likely not getting paid for this time, which is annoying. But someone needed to step up and do it and I'm not traveling, so I just did it. But it's definitely hard to set boundaries sometimes.

@cseley321 Wow, so soon.  That's crazy.  Interesting about the PPD. I hadn't even thought about that being a possibility since I've been wanting this for so long, but it's clearly very real and definitely better to face things than pretend they're not there. I bet with two things are going to be way harder so mom help sounds awesome. I wish we lived near family.

[Deleted User]

@gfgrump. I hear you on feeling like it's sort of genetic TMI, and maybe you wish you never knew... it certainly opens up a whole new ethical can of worms that parents never had to face before.

This is just my two cents, so take it or leave it, but is being bcra+ an absolute death sentence?  Does it necessarily cause miscarriage?  I am certainly not an expert, but I don't think so, on either account.  To take it to another level, and forgive me, but would it have been better if your mother had never been born?  Or your sister?  Or you???  Obviously not!!  So I mean, despite the fact that it is now a thing you cannot, "un-know," there is still so very much they don't understand about the human genome, (or cancer, for that matter).  We have no way of knowing what genetic therapies, or other treatments may be available in 20, 30, 40 years time.  If anything, like you said, now you, and/or hypothetically your daughters, can be forewarned and fore-armed!  That is great!  It is otherwise not really a thing that would have any outward affect on their quality of day-to-day life, right?  And all things being equal, if you hadn't needed ivf, and you hadn't found out, presumably you and YH would have just had kids on your own, and may or may not have ever found out your own or your daughters' BCRA status, (unless you opted to randomly take 23 and me or something, in which case, you might all be armed with the same information, and be in a better position to do something about it).

So now that you have that information about your embies, what does one do with it?  Imho, you could still transfer, knowing what you know, because TBH, it is not a death sentence, and anything can happen.  You could also potentially roll the dice with another retrieval,  more pgs, and hope that you get another bcra- embie to transfer in the bunch!  But I think it's great that you and YH are entertaining the possibility of having a sibling for your son.  Not everyone who does ivf is given that option, sadly.

It definitely gives you more to think about as a couple, as parents, in your whole family planning conversation, but to my mind, I'm not so sure it'd be a deal-breaker.  In all honesty, even with a "normie" there could be potentially harmful genes they are in fact + for, we just haven't identified yet.  Kwim?  Moreover, there are other genes which they <i>could have</i> tested positive for, that are known to cause major quality of life issues, where you could maybe make the argument, "what type of life would she have???"  But I don't personally believe that bcra is one of those cases.  All that to say, I'm not so sure it would prevent me from transferring, if we were in your shoes.  ;)

But of course, that's just a fairly random internet stranger's opinion - feel free to take it or leave it.  :)  I understand it's entirely a personal decision, one of the MOST personal decisions, and no one else has a right to search your heart or make it for you. ❤

*typo

hottietoddy

@2MomsHoping - I'm sorry work is stressful.  It legit sounds like bad management for them to put you on new projects now.  Might be good to be very clear now that you plan to not be working during maternity leave at all as you need to spend that time with your baby.  Let them know you are telling them how so they can plan accordingly.  Then don't apologize!  I have been there and I understand.  I just took on my last two projects which I think are good for me to keep me busy for a few more weeks but I'm starting to get nervous too what people might ask for while I'm out.  I can tell you with surgery and everything I've learned that people just have to deal with it. 

@safire3 I'm sorry you are having to think about that. I know it's easier said than done but try and enjoy the moment now being pregnant and excited for the baby if you can.  Things can change in the future and you and your husband still have time to decide.  We are all in the hard part right now and he hasn't gotten the pay out yet of enjoying the baby!  I know I go back and forth between not wanting another one to this week feeling strangely confident we could swing it financially and it would be worth another hard pregnancy.  I was told I'd most likely have to have not only fertility treatment but another cerclage from 12-14 weeks and be on limited activity/ home rest again for remainder.  My husband and I tell ourselves we are going to gather all the info and see how much we like and handle having one first.  It might help you to think like that so you aren't stressing now. With my anxiety it is very challenging for me to be patient and not make any final decisions.

How far along? EDD? 31 weeks last Tuesday, due date is still Sept 5th. But starting to discuss actually when things might go down. Cerclage comes out and progesterone stops at week 37.  That's only 6 weeks away! 

• How is everyone feeling this week? Surprisingly I am doing better this week.  With Ithe support of my husband, I have continued to set some boundaries with my MIL and mom and SIL and I think it is finally working to clear my mind. I've been writhing with anxiety over that stuff for months. Working on some with my brother this week also. I just have to stick up for myself and take care of us, then the rest comes second.  If people don't like it oh well! Had therapy appointment and feel confident I'm doing the right things so my anxiety and depression has lessened this week and my husband and I are enjoying each other. My dog also is doing much better and I'm so thankful.  We are slowly taking her off steroids and biggest challenge right now is she is having major stomach problems.  But we have meds and special food and going to keep trying.  Also I'm having much more social interaction with friends and family I actually like this week and it is really helping. Even made it to a bbq yesterday, it was very exciting for someone on home rest. My hips and back hurt really bad still but my husband has started rubbing them and it helps. I was scared for him to massage me before.  Also RL pain is worsening and shoots into my vagina and down the inside of my right leg too! Baby is right on my bladder and hurts when I stand up, but trying to just keep drinking water and going to bathroom. Our AC went out day before 4th and it was very challenging. I'm amazed because I didn't cry once all day.  Spent the afternoon at a friend's house and was very tired but ok.  I was just so thankful for my husband to be working at home to meet the technician to fix it and to be able to afford the $700 to pay for it.  I mean we could use that $700, don't get me wrong, but we aren't going to go into debt for it or not have to eat or something. He is also so kind and never yells at me when stressed.  He jumped right into action and was amazing.  I feel so lucky to have him as a partner.  

• Any upcoming appointments? Had Tues appointment all is well. Had NST and went well.  OB wants me to do a second Non stress test each Thurs. I said fine.  My blood sugar has been low and I had to reduce insulin.  I think it has evened out now but he is nervous about it.  I think he's just nervous in general bc I'm inching towards due date.  He said he thinks could be a sign the placenta isn't making enough hormones.  But I think I've just lost weight and my diabetes is fluctuating a bit.  Endocrinologist didn't seem concerned and gave me an A++ last week!  OB still is worried.  My bff had 2 babies with him and she said this is just how he gets towards end, guess it's his job to worry about all possible risks.  So I'm leaving that S#!t to him! Baby gets measured next Tuesday at perinatal and I'm supposed to have more conversation about how big he is and when I should deliver based on my GD and cerclage. 

• GTKY:  What are you doing for 4th of July?  I actually made it to a BBQ and it was so nice.  Then we watched fireworks from our driveway.

cseley321

@gfgrump Yeah that was exactly my problem. I wanted a baby so bad, and when she was finally with me, I just felt overwhelmed and frustrated. The csection, PP body, diagnosis of "mommy thumb", breastfeeding, sleeplessness... it all hit me hard. It wasn't until I got the surgery for my thumb at about 10 months PP that I started to feel like myself again.

Take it from me, PPD can strike anyone! If you don't feel right, let your OB know so you can explore options. I seriously feel like I just wasn't there mentally for my daughter in the first year and I heavily regret it. 

2MomsHoping

@safire3 I’m glad you are still doing well 37 weeks I would consider that full term! 

@safire3, @adirat, @persnickity, @lablover78, @cseley321, @gfgrump, @hottietoddy thank you all so much for your amazing support/advice/stories about the work stuff.  Not sure what I’ll be doing.  I was looking for a new job before we got out BFP and did get some nibbles but after I found out LO was on the way I totally dropped that since they were all higher responsibility/stress positions and I didn’t want to take that on with a pregnancy.  I don’t think I could totally quit or do a part time work from home gig because I bring home the higher salary but I we can make some sacrifices where I could go down a bit and we would be ok.  I think once LO is physically here it will be easier for me to allow myself to let the career take a back seat.  It’s just such a mental shift in priorities for me I think my brain is having trouble making the transition.  The conversation with my boss went…..eh at best but then when I reminded her my due date was now only about a month away I think it was a bit of a reality check and the conversation turned more productive.  She wasn’t crazy about me saying that my days of long hours are over for the near future, and she really wasn’t crazy to hear that I wouldn’t be checking my email while out on leave.  Though I did cave and say she could call in an emergency and ask questions.  It was a compromise and she can be unhappy if she wants to…and that’s a big ol’ pile of not my problem.    

@laurad75…lol to butt spasms I’m sure it is uncomfortable but it sounds kinda funny.  Oh pregnancy such a magical time.

@BusinessWife try not to worry too much at 30 weeks there is still time for your babe to flip and sounds like they have lots of options to work with it.  If it makes you feel any better when my mom had me I was breech and they were able to flip me WHILE she was in active labor (though from the sounds of it I wouldn’t recommend it, she said it was pretty uncomfortable). I’ve also heard swimming can help babies flip too, but if they have flipped it can also make it easier for them to flip back too…Have you started your hynobabies classes?

@Irisheyes81, hope you were able to stay inside yesterday with your swelling especially with the heat and humidity.  Sounds like baby is growing so well hope you continue to hang in there!

@gfgrump I have no idea how you are exercising at this stage…#respect.  My “exercise” is watering my flowers the minimum amount and moving crap around my house in attempts to “organize”..lol.  I think it’s totally natural to have a gender preference people just don’t talk about it.  Before we got pregnant my stance was I always wanted a little boy, and if we didn’t have a girl I would be great as long as I got a boy eventually….now I’ve kinda flipped and want to have a boy and a girl both!  Those little pants are darling!  I wish I could sew.  My mom gave me her old machine but I need to have her come over and teach me how to use it.  And boy do I LOVE a good organization project.  I have several areas in my home that look like you’re “before” picture slowly trying to tackle them before baby arrives and I don’t think I will ever get past the ikea part of my life just too good of a deal for little projects like that.  For the BRACA+ your right too much information sometimes stinks and it’s hard to stand in someone else’s shoes for that sort of thing, but I think we all pass on things to our kids that aren’t ideal, none of us are “perfect” genetic specimens knowing the bad you are passing on with all that good has to be extremely difficult BUT there can still be a lot of really really amazing good in those embryos too.  I don’t envy having to make that decision but I wouldn’t blame you are think you should have guilt for transferring and embryo with the BRACA gene.  Hugs friend. 

@cseley321 you are in the homestretch!  I think a lot of women both with IF and everyone else put pressure on themselves to ignore PPD because they feel like the “should” feel a certain way.  It sounds like you have a great attitude going into this.  There is absolutely no shame in getting help.  Do what’s right for you so you can enjoy time with your family!  Who cares what anyone else thinks they don’t need to know if you don’t want them too and it’s none of their business anyways. 

@hottietoddy glad things are going pretty ok for you and girl you just can’t put a price on AC during the summer when you are this pregnant!!!  Does your doc think you will go into labor pretty soon after they take out the cerclage?  Glad you were able to enjoy some BBQ and fireworks!  We also can see some from our house it’s so nice to have to not go anywhere to watch them!

@cseley321 What’s “mommy thumb?”

Can you lose your mucus plug at 34weeks?  Saw something a little strange today and consulted dr.google but pictures seem to vary a lot.  I went ahead and sent a mychart message to my OB just to be safe.  Feeling totally fine except for a start of a cold.  Not even any BH today so I’m not too worried but wondered if anyone else has had this happen. Who knows maybe is just weird discharge and nothing else. 

hottietoddy

 @jr102217 so amazing congratulations you did it!!!! 

cseley321

@2MomsHoping it's a form of tendinitis that you can develop after giving birth. Basically it is a shooting, sharp pain in your wrist where your thumb tendons are, and doing things like lifting or holding your baby triggers the pain and you feel the sharp pain and then go limp for an instant. I was so scared of dropping her. They make a special thumb/wrist brace for it. Sometimes a cortisone shot fixes it, but in rare cases it requires surgery. I was one of those rare cases lol

ETA, on the mucus plug, you can lose it that early and it can also regenerate back

safire3

@2MomsHoping good for you for having that talk with your boss and make sure to stick to what you agreed to because they will test your boundaries!
I have also heard that you can lose some of your mucous plug but it will also regenerate if nothing else happens within a week or so.

@cseley321  you are so close! I agree with you about the PPD. Doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks, you have to do what’s best for you and your babies and just because we struggled to get pregnant doesn’t make us immune!

@BusinessWife you still have lots of time for you LO to turn. Also I can’t remember when it started but there came a time when I started having to take a nap every day just to make it through the work day. I would eat my lunch really fast then take a nap for 15-30mins depending on what time I went to lunch. Even a short nap like 5 mins seemed to help me a lot. 

@laurad75 hope you had a great time and happy belated birthday!

@jr102217 congrats girl! You are a trooper!

Afm saw the OB yesterday and had my first cervical check. Been having a lot of Braxton Hicks but apparently nothing is happening to my cervix yet. She also said she did some research and although my placenta is still very low, trying for a vaginal delivery is preferred unless I start bleeding. She is on vacation most of next week so I see her again next Friday and if there’s still nothing going on by then, we can plan induction for the next week. Trying my best to be patient and enjoy this last couple weeks, especially since this may be my only pregnancy. 

hottietoddy

@2MomsHoping - the doctors don't know when I will go into labor.  When they take out the cerclage at 37 weeks I'll also stop progesterone as well. Because those things where put in place to keep my cervix long and closed, once they are gone things could progress quickly, or take a while.  They really don't have a way of knowing without just doing it, but it will help inform my next pregnancy he said. The second issue is that if the baby is pushing 9 lbs they might induce or do a C-section.  He said that babies can be born that big but with GD it is recommended to keep the baby smaller because they can have bigger shoulders than a typical baby and get stuck.  He was saying that he'd rather schedule a C-section than perform an emergency one because there is more risk for infection, risk, etc.  My doctor is very risk adverse though.  I told him on Tuesday that I would like a normal delivery as long as he will let me so we should all work towards that. He was fine with that.  He asked me if I plan to have another kid also because that factors into the C-section decision and I said, he should put me in the yes column for that.  I don't know 100% that I will but if I do I'd like to plan for it.   

Also since I'm AMA, I'll probably have the second one very quickly like pregnant again after a year so I can deliver before 40... For some reason this week I feel like I could handle that.  I think it might be because we are getting close to having Everything ready for the baby . We are completing our registry, getting final things set up and washed in nursery and kitchen and then we are watching a baby care class online and packing the hospital bag.....then we are pretty set.  We are saving baby proofing for on going things to do and will probably get most of it done also, but taking our time. I'm sure I'll be exhausted again when baby is here but I think I will enjoy it so much too. I've done some pretty difficult things in my life like go through architecture school where I barely slept for 5 years so I am pretty confident I can deal with the hard work.  My husband is a hard worker and dedicated too.   But again, I'm strangely optimistic this week, so I might change my tune.  

[Deleted User]

@2MomsHoping. Yes, we did start!  DH came with me to the first one, but he had to work late and miss the second.  Hopefully he doesn't miss any more!  :#  I had trouble the first time I tried to get my downloads, so I've got to try that again this weekend and start listening more... lots of homework!!!  How are you doing keeping up with all your practice?

2MomsHoping

Hi ladies. Could someone start the weekly thread for me tomorrow?  You all were right about the schedule being unsustainable. I’m insanely sick with an upper repiratority infection. It’s so awful. I basically have to stand all the time just to breath. I’m so exhausted. They are having me go in for a chest X-ray since it just keeps getting worse. I’m all nerves hope to catch up soon. 

laurad75

@2MomsHoping I'm on it.  Feel better soon. 

hottietoddy

@2MomsHoping hope you feel better soon take it easy and remember you and babies health is #1 priority.  If work falls off that is okay take care of yourself first! Thinking of you and hope it gets better soon. ♥️