Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

HELP: Pregnant while SIL m/c

I need advise on how to act/handle being pregnant with twins while my SIL (who was due around the same time as me) m/c 6 wks ago.... I try to be respectful of her and not bring up anything pregnancy related because she is very dramatic.... but every time we are at a family function she immediately asks me questions about my pregnancy but then she immediately ends up crying.... I only answer the questions shes asking and it’s not like I try to rub in her face that I’m still pregnant..I honestly don’t like being anywhere around her now because no matter what I do she brings up my pregnancy and then turns it into something like “I woulda been xx weeks today” or “we should be bringing three babies home in Feb not just your two” and I honestly don’t even know how to respond to her because I’m not the one who brings it up. I feel like inside she is holding a grudge that I am still pregnant and she’s not and I get being upset because it would be hard however I personally wouldn’t bring the subject up if I knew it were going to upset me.... has anyone had something similar or have some advise on how I can handle this the remainder of my pregnancy because I don’t want to be at family events if she’s going to do that every time and make me feel bad.

Re: HELP: Pregnant while SIL m/c

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  • knottie8million: This was NOT a good place to post this. But, since you did, let me help you out:
    She's trying to be kind to you and to reach out to you despite the fact that her baby DIED and her entire world is falling apart and she probably feels a cavern of pain on the inside. Sorry that her DEAD BABY makes you feel bad, but maybe you should just STFU and listen to her. And you 'feeling bad' after talking to her is probably because dead babies make you uncomfortable. I get it, I've got 4 of them and they make me feel like a mental nutcase every day; especially because people don't want to talk to me about my children.
    Please try to have some sympathy for your SIL and deal with the sadness you feel from talking to her. I promise you, it's not even a blip on the screen of the amount of sadness she's dealing with from looking at you and talking to you, and yet she's going out of her way to try to be kind TO YOU. 
    So... Suck It Up, Buttercup!

    movie harrison ford air force one get off my plane GIF

    MC #1: D&C Oct 23, 2015 (7.5 weeks)
    MC #2: July 1, 2016 (5.5 weeks)
    MC #3: October 17, 2016 (CP)
    RE #1: RPL testing November 2016-January 2017
    MC #4: Feb. 28, 2017 (CP)
    RE #2: Additional RPL testing March-November 2017
    MC #5: January 2019 (6.5 weeks)

    RE #3: More testing 2023. 
    Egg Retrieval Sept/Oct 2023, 2 good embryos after PGT-A testing.
    Surgery for endometriosis January 2024
    Lupron Depo March 2024.  Benched 3 months.  Hopefully FET after that.


  • edited November 2017

    **Removed for TOU violation**

  • You are posting this in a community full of women who have lost their babies and you really think you are going to get some support? What the hell is wrong with you? My heart aches for your SIL... but as for you, jog on.
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