Twatwaffle Tuesday

hullabalou

Who do you hate today?

wonderbex

I hate everyone who asks me if we were "trying for a boy." Or says, "it better be a boy!" We have two beautiful girls and we're not trying for a boy. We would love to have a son, just as much as we would love to have another beautiful daughter. By saying that it better be a boy, or oh no for my "poor husband" if it's another girl, implies that depending on what's between our child's legs is going to determine whether this child is wanted or loved. News flash: we wanted another awesome kid. That's it. Eff.

heatherdubrow

@wonderbex same here! I would be thrilled with a third girl, or a boy! 

missydallas

Can I just say MH (who I love, but right now hating) for doing the bare minimum in cleaning up an accident our dog left while I'm heaving trying to clean it up? Like dude.....can I get some help here, I'm just busy carrying your children who constantly make me sick. K thx bye.

@wonderbex  - heck yes to just having an awesome child!

kiki75

Not quite to full twatwaffle but MIL is pushing my buttons. We ended up telling her right after our US. I tried to discourage it ('cause I saw the trainwreck coming) but he was so excited and I can't fault the guy. Now, you should know that she's been on my a$$ about kids since before we were engaged. We would leave family functions and she would shout after us, "Go make babies!" So we're talking a good eight years. So she was super excited. She's apparently had a gift sitting around wrapped for who knows how long in anticipation of this. Great. But then she starts in on how much she hopes it's a girl because her other two grandkids are boys. *TW* To give context, I was still bleeding from my MC, which she knew about, when she told me that she would pay for a girl. At least I was drunk enough at the time that I just popped off and walked away. Then she's asking which one I really hope it is, "And don't give me that 'we just want a healthy baby' thing!" I've had two losses and infertility. No, really. I just want a healthy baby. Then it's on to how H is going to have to put together a nursery (like I can't?) and she knows how he hates to do anything around the house (WTF??). We're a pair of adults. We can handle some paint and furniture assembly.

But now, she's on to badgering us about telling her sister. She sent a text the day after we told her last week and we said a very clear no. (For one thing, once we tell one aunt, we have to tell all the aunts or people get rightfully hurt and pissed.) Then last night, she was texting again badgering us about telling her. H calls her and tells her that this is our thing and we get to choose when to tell. "I know but I want you to tell her so I can talk to her about it!" I'm having such a hard time not telling H, "I told you so."

heatherdubrow

@kiki75 ugh. That's so sweet that she's so excited but omg she sounds so overbearing. You're going to have to keep a tight rein on your boundaries when your LO gets here!

crossfitbabybump

Ugh!!!!! People who think they know exactly what I'm going through.. physically and emotionally. NO. You don't. Your pregnancy IS NOT MY PREGNANCY! I knew people's "opinions" would come with this territory but damn... back off!!!!! Note - I don't mind helpful, kind advice. It's the advice that comes off as rude and goes against exactly what I said. When I'm told NO, that's now how you should be feeling right now or NO that's now what's going on right now. How the hell do they even know!? They don't! It's so freakin' frustrating and I am on the verge of just flipping out on the next person that tries to tell me how I'm feeling!

Rant over.

@wonderbex - you keep having AWESOME children!

babybluu

My dog is a major TW. She keeps farting and it smells so bad  why dog, why??? *gag*

ambybambi

@kiki75 she sounds over the top and insensitive, glad your DH is able to reel her in a bit. 

stow2009

@Ambybambi @kiki75 my thoughts exactly! How wonderful that your husband tells her the boundaries. That is a MAN! 

vflux33

@kiki75 just solidified my not telling ILs till after genetic testing stance... so sorry you have to deal with that. She sounds like a piece of work.

muggle621

@kiki75 I'm sorry your MIL is hounding you! It sounds like you and your H are handling her well though. 

My TW is sort of my husband and my MIL. My MIL is very introverted and just retired a couple wks ago. She doesn't really have any hobbies or friends so my husband and his brothers are basically her life.  MH mows her lawn and helps her around the house often (his brothers live out of town and she lives 10 min away). I have been trying to tell him we are going to have to hire a lawn service for her when the baby comes b/c between his work, his side job (he's a Firefighter and they all have side jobs due to their weird schedule), and our own ginormous yard he will not have the time and energy to do it. So far he is not really down with my suggestion. I don't want him to burn himself out. I might add she is very manipulative with her "poor mom all alone" act. I'm introverted too but I know I have to participate in the world sometimes! I'm just afraid she is going to overwork my husband and be WAY too involved in our lives when the baby comes. 

Thanks for letting me vent! 

becausescience

@kiki75 Sorry your MIL is being a bordelineTW. I'm glad your DH is willing to stand up to her.

@muggle621 Ugh that is tough. I do think starting to do a little less would be good before the baby gets here. A lawn service seems like a small and reasonable step. And encouraging some sort of social activity would be good too.

gh515

@kiki75 ugh, that's the worst. It always surprises me when grown adults act so self-centered.... You are a patient woman for staying level-headed with her! 

ShawnnaO

@kiki75 @muggle621 oh my goodness I feel so bad for you ladies. 

bettyvonsomethingstein

@muggle621, our husbands are in the same profession and I also have a TW MIL.  Cheers!

muggle621

@bettyvonsomethingstein  I knew you were cool! 
Does your husband work 24 on, 24 off etc? 

bettyvonsomethingstein

@muggle621, yes!! It was a challenge at first, and sometimes still is, but you get really good at fine-tuning your solo routine!

muggle621

Ok, I just wanted to make sure I would survive. All of his firefighters friend's wives either have grown kids or no kids so I have been dying to ask someone! 

bettyvonsomethingstein

You will survive!  I promise!  Feel free to PM me any time you want to ask question on how we handle certain situations or if you just need some support!  It's definitely a different way of life, but I wouldn't trade it for anything

kmalls

Can a thread be a twatwaffle? If so, I've got a strong contender...

GG620

@kiki75 ugh so sorry that your MIL is being a TW. It is nice that she is excited, but given your history you think she would calm it down on the insensitive comments. 

@muggle621 ugh sorry for the pickle. It is funny because you have his best interests at heart in that you don't want him over-working himself but its sometimes like they take it as a personal attack. Hope it gets resolves and he comes around on the lawn service

hullabalou

muggle621 said:

Ok, I just wanted to make sure I would survive. All of his firefighters friend's wives either have grown kids or no kids so I have been dying to ask someone! 

Just a different perspective-my dad was a firefighter growing up and I loved his schedule. He was home a lot of random weekdays and would take us out for breakfast before school or occasionally let us skip school if something like the fair was in town.

historeliza

kmalls said:

Can a thread be a twatwaffle? If so, I've got a strong contender...

I think I know what you're referring to, and yes!

pbtoast

The AC situation in my office is a serious TW. It is so damn hot in here I feel like I'm going to melt. Luckily I only work about 4-5 hours/week because I wouldn't survive in here full time with morning sickness and exhaustion. Also- FFTC: I totally got up from a nap and came in to work without brushing my hair or anything. I should probably look in the mirror before my next client gets here. 

hullabalou

pbtoast said:

The AC situation in my office is a serious TW. It is so damn hot in here I feel like I'm going to melt. Luckily I only work about 4-5 hours/week because I wouldn't survive in here full time with morning sickness and exhaustion. Also- FFTC: I totally got up from a nap and came in to work without brushing my hair or anything. I should probably look in the mirror before my next client gets here. 

My office AC is a TW for the opposite reason. I'm naturally warm-natured and hate being too hot, but it is literally 60 degrees or cooler in here at all times. I shiver at my desk wearing long sleeves and a sweater.

vflux33

@muggle621 I relate to you so hard on the MIL thing. Mine is also an introvert and plays the poor lonely me card allllll the time, it's so manipulative. Luckily she lives in another state, but she talks about moving to where we live once there are grandkids frequently and I am terrified. She doesn't have a job here, can't really afford the costs of living here, and has no one here but us so if she came she would be with us 24/7. MH agrees her living here would be a bad idea, but he refuses to be honest with her about it because he's worried about upsetting her. She has been known in the past to make huge decisions that have a negative financial/life impact without consulting anyone and only sharing it after she has committed to it and can't get out of it. I know as soon a second she find she out I'm pregnant, it's  going to be a mess. 

mdfarmchick

@vflux33 wow. That just sucks all the way around. You are not alone in the crappy MIL situation so I'm here if you ever need to vent. 

vflux33

I might take you up on that @mdfarmchick

fullofhope25

An arrogant a**hole student who thinks that I am one of his peers and that HIS grades are primarily MY responsibility (not HIS AT ALL!).

I mean... Isn't that the job of college professors?? To chase down students to make sure they have submitted THEIR assignments on time, in spite of the syllabus and multiple announcements indicating due dates, expectations, etc.

I must be the fool here. 

chasingroygbiv

My SIL. DH and MY grandma both got calls from a bank asking for her today. I still don't know if it was legit because they said they were calling from a specific bank, but it's had a new name for years... andplusalso, WHY are they calling DH and my grandma????? She can't stand my family so why she would ever "fake" a connection, I don't know. Either way, don't call us in reference to her, she's a nut job and a half. 

paigew123

hullabalou said:

My office AC is a TW for the opposite reason. I'm naturally warm-natured and hate being too hot, but it is literally 60 degrees or cooler in here at all times. I shiver at my desk wearing long sleeves and a sweater.

This exactly!!!!!! And if I dare shut it, my boss goes stir crazy......he's the biggest tw of all! 
My dh felt so bad for me tht he came one day to close up the vent in my room with a garbage bag...it's gotten a bit more manageable, but still pretty cold!

kalawa

@muggle621@bettyvonsomethingstein My SO has the same crazy schedule and profession. Does he get the one week off a month too because of all the 24hr shifts adding up? I love my SO...but a week home every month drives me batty.