There's a few times a year when we leave DD at daycare to go Christmas shopping, prep for thanksgiving, etc. Its just so much easier to get errands done when you don't have to worry about nap time and entertaining a kid. So I am one of those parents who does it. Otherwise we spend every Saturday cramming all our errand-running in because we both work full time.
I have absolutely no issue with people who are already paying for daycare to use it to be able to go on a day date instead of paying more to hire a babysitter at night to go out. I think it's important to connect with your partner and there are fun things to do during the day that you may not be able to do at night. Our schools and daycare are open on Veterans Day and I have off. I've used that as a day to get things done around the house that are more difficult to do when the kids are around and to have a lunch date with DH. I haven't taken a vacation day just to have a day date with DH, but I'm definitely not opposed to it.
I also don't see an issue with spending quality time with each child even if that means putting some in daycare or with family. DS1 has had off from school and I don't always pull DS2 from daycare if it's open. DS2 is a handful, DS1 doesn't get a lot of one on one time with either of us unless we're taking him to one of his activities and he really appreciates those occasional days where he gets to do something with one or both of us. In the summer, he spends 1 week with each of his grandparents so DS2 has us all to himself. We do almost everything together, but I want each child to have that quality time or special occasion where all of our attention is just focused on him.
We went away for a long weekend for our 10th anniversary, but other than that, all of our trips are family vacations. I wouldn't be opposed to the occasional overnight or weekend away, but we don't have family who live too close. The one thing that bothers me is family members who still act like they have no kids and frequently go out, including leaving the kids overnight with relatives even at the newborn and young infant stage, and go away multiple times per year for kid free vacations. They take other family members for granted and book trips and just assume the kids will be watched by the grandparents without even asking first. It's ridiculous, but at the same time, the family members don't speak up about being inconvenienced for fear of causing issues.
I'm all for supporting small businesses, entrepreneurs esp ladies/friends/moms, etc. but if I took myself off a Facebook friend's Lipsense/Arbonne/Plexus/Limelight whatever group page only to be added again or invited to join again, I'm like uhhhh. I'm trying to save money, invest, and prepare for a family of 4 so I do not have time to buy things I don't need. Maybe one day but not now.
I've had to press the "F U" button on my cell twice this week bec one friend calling trying to sell me Arbonne (who only calls me to sell stuff and not to chat) & another to tell me about lipsense. I keep telling her I can't wear makeup at work bec we have a Class I environmentally controlled area (eca) for our medical products (engineer who ha to walk in every so often to the Eca). I used to buy stuff to be nice but now I'm like no, certain people (not all) only contact you to buy stuff and not catch up as a friend.
Re: unnecessary daycare: I have this aquaintance who has a 4 year old and only works part time evenings. Her 4yo is in day care 3 days a week so she can "do things around the house" and "run errands".... ummm wtf? Also her husband works as much overtime as he can so they can afford the luxury of acquaintance only working part time and paying for daycare... again.... ummm wtf? To top it off she tells people how she left her career to work part time so she could be a sahm... alrighty then.
I have DD in daycare, and i have zero guilt if i finish work early and go home to chill out or get a few things done. She is happy there, and by getting things sorted, meal prep done etc, it means that when i get her we actually have quality time rather then me half ignoring her while trying to do everything that needs to be done in the evening. And sometimes? I just take a nap. Again, zero guilt. If i dont look after myself, and do things to make myself happy/calm whatever, how can i look after my family and care for them properly. DD is still going to go to daycare 2 days a week while im on maternity leave with this LO, simply for my sanity. That way i get 2 days a week where i only have to cope with a newborn. Even if i was planning on being a SAHM, I would still do this for those first months. New borns are hard and demanding and sleep deprivation makes a mama crazy. Thats two days a week where i dont have to keep it together in front of the toddler, and two days a week where she gets to go and play and get the amount of attention that i just wont be able to give her for a while.
Re: UO 6/8
Otherwise we spend every Saturday cramming all our errand-running in because we both work full time.
I also don't see an issue with spending quality time with each child even if that means putting some in daycare or with family. DS1 has had off from school and I don't always pull DS2 from daycare if it's open. DS2 is a handful, DS1 doesn't get a lot of one on one time with either of us unless we're taking him to one of his activities and he really appreciates those occasional days where he gets to do something with one or both of us. In the summer, he spends 1 week with each of his grandparents so DS2 has us all to himself. We do almost everything together, but I want each child to have that quality time or special occasion where all of our attention is just focused on him.
We went away for a long weekend for our 10th anniversary, but other than that, all of our trips are family vacations. I wouldn't be opposed to the occasional overnight or weekend away, but we don't have family who live too close. The one thing that bothers me is family members who still act like they have no kids and frequently go out, including leaving the kids overnight with relatives even at the newborn and young infant stage, and go away multiple times per year for kid free vacations. They take other family members for granted and book trips and just assume the kids will be watched by the grandparents without even asking first. It's ridiculous, but at the same time, the family members don't speak up about being inconvenienced for fear of causing issues.
I've had to press the "F U" button on my cell twice this week bec one friend calling trying to sell me Arbonne (who only calls me to sell stuff and not to chat) & another to tell me about lipsense. I keep telling her I can't wear makeup at work bec we have a Class I environmentally controlled area (eca) for our medical products (engineer who ha to walk in every so often to the Eca). I used to buy stuff to be nice but now I'm like no, certain people (not all) only contact you to buy stuff and not catch up as a friend.