July 2017 Moms

Unpopular Opinions Thursday 3-16-17

124

Re: Unpopular Opinions Thursday 3-16-17

  • @kerils  You could have been one of my students smh.  I remember when leggings were popular in the 90s and that's all I would wear to elementary school.
  • UO: Shamrock shakes are DISGUSTING and make me want to boycot McDonald's this time of year.  Who actually buys these and likes them?!?
    Yesss!! I have never understood the popularity of those. 
    OperaSingerMommydancegurl1118
  • I agree about the shakes. I hate anything mint flavored though. My husband tried the shamrock frappe. He seems to like it. 

    Forget what my UO was going to be. Sinus pressure is getting to me today.
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  • kat0607kat0607 member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    UO: Shamrock shakes are DISGUSTING and make me want to boycot McDonald's this time of year.  Who actually buys these and likes them?!?
    Ugh my DH LOVES them, but I've never had one. I don't understand the appeal either...
    Sorry guys, I'm on mobile so I've just gotten around to responding and reading all of this, but there are a lot of good UO's here today!

    Re: DST - the time change at this time of year doesn't mess with me as much as setting the clocks back in the fall. Sunset at 5pm is just the literal WORST. I constantly feel tired.

    Re: Leggings - I'm not a fan of wearing them in public unless my shirt or sweatshirt covers my butt. I'll also wear a dress with leggings in the winter. I was never into the trend of wearing leggings as pants with normal shirts. More recently though, if I'm quickly running an errand and happen to be wearing leggings, I will just go out with them on. Also I wore leggings to work almost every day during this pregnancy when my belly was in the awkward phase of: too big for normal jeans, too small for maternity anything. So I basically had to live in leggings until my belly grew a bit.
    OperaSingerMommy
  • Confession: I had no idea that they were flavored mint. I thought they were just dyed green because of the holiday.
     I feel stupid.

    So glad I never ordered one though because I don't like mint either!
    OperaSingerMommy
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  • I love Shamrock shakes but I've never had one.  They just remind me of home (Massachusetts).  I do love mint flavored things.  Mint chocolate chip is my favorite ice cream flavor.  Being pregnant may be the best excuse to finally try it.
  • I never joined the spreadsheet and I dont think I did an introduction because I figured no one would read it anyways.
  • stokesm21stokesm21 member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary Photogenic
    edited March 17
    Yup. I'm that person who parks in the expectant spot. They wouldn't have made them if we weren't supposed to use them. Honestly. There are few perks to being pregnant and that's one I'm going to use and not care who side-eyes  me. As long as I'm visibly pregnant (which at this point I am) I don't give AF. Winter in Canada in hard enough without being pregnant lol!  Although I will admit I literally JUST started using said parking. 75% because walking was not my friend today (new belly pains as well as some pretty horrendous hip pain lately) and 25%  sheer laziness. All the spots were empty anyways. And in reality, it really didn't get me that much closer. We do have quite a few places here that have completely separate "family" spots from the expectant spots as well. IMO those spots are for people with infants and toddlers. 

    Hate pineapple. Just absolutely hate it. Smells wonderful, hate the taste. And it's slimy. On the other hand I'm a berry fiend. Fruit is really my friend. I could gorge on strawberries, blueberries, raspberries, apples, watermelon and bananas for the rest of my life. 

    Cravings: Definitely have had a few but I've never felt the "I NEED it NOW."  Nor would I ever send my DH out at obscene hours to get me anything. Or even during normal hours. If he's going into town or on his way home from work then that's a different story. 

    DST screwed me up for all of 1 day but I haven't been sleeping well lately anyways so who knows. Every parent in my life loathes it. I've come up with a master plan to start adjusting my LO over the course of the week leading up to it. Yes, I realize that's wishful thinking and in reality it probably'(okay, most likely) will not go as planned. A girl can dream! LOL 
    Me: 29 DH: 31 SS: 12
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  • @chiquita928 - burn those devil leggings! 
  • My UO is, I don't get all the rave about certain baby gear products.  I just don't see so many of them as necessary. Like the Doc-A-Tot or MamaRoo are some that come to mind. 

    There are girls at they gym that constantly talk about some of the gear they had to have with their first borns in the past year and they swear by it. Although, I appreciate that they want to tell me about their amazing experiences with such products I've never needed them with any of my previous 3 children or my 3 younger siblings who I was old enough to help my mom out with. It's a lot of money for those items and I think I can make due without them even this time around. I mean are babies getting smarter as they're born or something??? Have they somehow adapted to previous technologies they were never exposed to?? LOL

    But to you mommies who swear by them I am in no means trying to say you are wrong and to those who think they will be a necessity by all means give them a try. 

  • Late to the thread but it's still Thursday so here goes...

    Uhm, how can someone hate fruit?  I mean it's fruit - they are so wonderfully yummy.  More pineapples for me I guess!

    Early pregnancy I definitely had cravings and aversions.  I craved a certain 'taste' versus a specific food but once my brain identified the food that would satisfy the craving - it was all over.

    DST is still messing with our toddler - we wasted 2 hours trying to get him down 'on time' tonight.  Major fail.

    My UO:  I should preface this with I didn't grow up in the U.S. so my experience and perspective are different.  I think that if my child is going over to your house, and especially if I am not going to be there, you should declare if you have a gun in the house.  Apparently, I'm supposed to ask and 'it's normal' and to be expected. WTF.  I'm beyond worked up about it and may have fractured a friendship by barring said visits but seriously WTF.  I had just assumed this person didn't have a firearm in their house. (Am not trying to have a debate about whether or not one should have a gun.  Clearly, in this country, it's your decision.) Is everyone else asking before they allow a play date?  Do moms in general not care about this i.e. don't think it's a big deal?  Is this really normal?  


    mj8215PurplePoppy424virginiaunicorn11
  • lanie1000lanie1000 member
    500 Love Its 100 Comments Photogenic Name Dropper
    edited March 17
    @poppyseed72017 YES!! I had a coworker tell me with a serious face that I needed a doc-a-tot otherwise my baby won't sleep at night. I looked at the price and laughed. 

    Re: fruit - I am with every single mama on this board who complained about cantaloupe and honeydew. They are the most overrated fruit ever. And why are they always like 95% of every fruit salad??! 

    Edited to fix tag. 
    BusyZee
  • @lanie1000 the prices on those are ridiculous! It's fabric layed out in a pattern then stuffed with pillow filling or whatever. Like, why??? 
    lanie1000
  • @poppyseed1017 I've never even heard of a doc a tot until now!
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  • @caribbeanmama Personally, I don't allow my kids to go have play dates with any friend unless I know the parents well. Usually, if my kid wants a play date with another child whose parents I don't know well, I invite the kid to our house instead of having my child go to theirs. Usually, I always discreetly talk about politics and broach the gun subject during the getting to know the parents time, well before ever even thinking of play dates. Like-minded people usually blurt out quickly what their views on personal gun ownership is, and then I know. 

    My kids have been to play dates at two households that contained guns. One was of a friend who's husband is a law inforcment officer, and I knew he had a gun, but trusted him completely because he's a responsible law officer. The other is my brother, who keeps his guns locked away and I grilled him about safety and such. 

    It's a delicate subject for sure. I personally do not own guns and don't like guns, but other people have different views. I'd rather my child play in my gun-free house with their friends than at a household with unknown gun safety measures. Not all gun owners are responsible, and it would be a mistake to assume all are. Not all gun owners are irresponsible, and it would be a mistake to judge and assume all are. It's about personal comfort with the person and knowing very well what safety measures are being taken. Again, getting to know all parents on such a personal level is difficult, thus most play dates happen in my house for this very reason! 
    caribbeanmama-2PurplePoppy424
  • @caribbeanmama we have a gun that is locked in a safe that I don't even know how to access, in a part of the house where children would never be unattended. (It's a relatively new safe, I just never got around to asking H what the code is). It would honestly never occur to me to inform the parents of my children's friends that it's there. 
    caribbeanmama-2cait32
  • @OperaSingerMommy I hadn't either until more recently when 2 different moms swore by it. Just wait till you look it up!! 
    OperaSingerMommy
  • @supermom83 yes the topic should have come up sooner - I agree!  Thanks for sharing your thoughts and experience.   I just found out our nanny has a gun at home - she loves our son very much and of course I trust her with him, she's 49 and has watched him since he was 4 months old (he's now 20 months).  We recently got her a car seat so she can pick him up from school and so occasionally she has asked if she can pop over to her house to let her dogs out and change up the routine of the day a little bit with our son - it had never been a problem until I found out this week that they got a gun a couple years ago.  This is going to sound so silly but -  I had assumed that because she is a devout Christian and hosts bible study twice a week and just you know from interacting with her in my house for over a year that she would never have a firearm.  It just did not cross my mind to ask.  So having the conversation after the fact and this far into our relationship was super awkward!   Are you and your husband both on the same page?

    @Adabyron thanks for chiming in too.  Just curious, would it bother you if your child were playing at someone else's house where they had firearms?  Or are you more relaxed about it because you have one? 
  • @caribbeanmama I am very pro-sensible gun regulation and i do ask people now. I never used to until we went to a playdate at a preschool friend's house and it dawned on me that the mom and the husband were both LEOs. I asked her a lot of questions about gun ownership etc and I left that day feeling validated in my concerns and feeling like I can ask without feeling weird about it. 
    caribbeanmama-2
  • @ginger1228 lol they're not actually mine...just found the image and thought it fit here well!

    As far as gun ownership goes, we do not own a gun, nor will we likely ever. Every single one of our parents does, though, and so does my sister. All of them are very responsible with their guns, though, so I trust my child at their homes. Because of that, I tend to forget that not all people are as responsible, so thank you for the reminder.  At this point, we don't really have any play dates at all, so it's been easy. It's definitely something we'll have to figure out how to ask when the time comes, though.
    caribbeanmama-2ginger1228
  • @ktewart I appreciate your thoughts and honesty on guns and proper storage etc. Where we live guns are something people have, but not in a 'hunting, doing it since I was a kid' type of way. So I have had discussions about my DH on this a bit.
    I would very much want to know if my child is at a home with guns, if they are stored safely and the owners are responsible and have the type of respect towards firearms I would want, like you, then fine. But, until I ask I have no way of knowing, and that I am uncomfortable with. 

    My sister lives in MO where you do not need to have a permit to conceal carry and she has made me even more aware of questions to ask etc. She has even started discussing with her daughter what to do if she is ever at someones house and sees a gun, that is just something they deal with where she is. I am grateful where I live, you need a permit that at least requires some education and testing. 

    @caribbeanmama i am with you on the I am going to be asking. I would rather potentially offend someone than have my child in a situation or environment I am not comfortable with or could be dangerous.

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  • rae1-3rae1-3 member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    @ktewart I appreciate your thoughts and honesty on guns and proper storage etc. Where we live guns are something people have, but not in a 'hunting, doing it since I was a kid' type of way. So I have had discussions about my DH on this a bit.
    I would very much want to know if my child is at a home with guns, if they are stored safely and the owners are responsible and have the type of respect towards firearms I would want, like you, then fine. But, until I ask I have no way of knowing, and that I am uncomfortable with. 

    My sister lives in MO where you do not need to have a permit to conceal carry and she has made me even more aware of questions to ask etc. She has even started discussing with her daughter what to do if she is ever at someones house and sees a gun, that is just something they deal with where she is. I am grateful where I live, you need a permit that at least requires some education and testing. 

    @caribbeanmama i am with you on the I am going to be asking. I would rather potentially offend someone than have my child in a situation or environment I am not comfortable with or could be dangerous.

    For the record - you never need a permit to have a gun in your home. The conceal carry just allows you to carry a concealed weapon in public. So this wouldn't really protect you from someone having a gun in their home. 
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  • My DH has several guns and he enjoys shooting for fun (as in going to gun ranges). This is not uncommon where we live. They are kept in the basement in a gun safe and are not loaded. 

    DH has already mentioned the wanting to teach our baby about gun safety and how to shoot, when he is old enough. I'm okay with this as my DH is trained in this stuff (military) and wouldn't leave him unsupervised. 

    I would be pretty offended, however, if someone did not allow their child to play at my house because we have guns. I wouldn't mind if someone asked if we guns in the house, but it's not like we would leave them around the house and loaded. We're responsible people. 
    rae1-3stokesm21
  • I totally would understand if a parent wouldn't want their children playing at my house due to my (locked and hidden) guns. And I plan on asking anyone whose house my children goes to many questions about their guns. 

    UO: it blew my mind that the rigorous background check including police finger printing I went through to purchase a gun legally was not the standard. I always thought people for gun control were crazy, because I thought how much more restricted are you trying to make it?! Then I realized in many places it's a free for all and that to me, as a gun owner, is insane. 
    TTC: 1/2014 BFP: 9/24 EDD: 6/8/2015 Sorry for the poor man's siggy...ticker won't load regardless of how many tips I read.
  • rae1-3rae1-3 member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    My DH has several guns and he enjoys shooting for fun (as in going to gun ranges). This is not uncommon where we live. They are kept in the basement in a gun safe and are not loaded. 

    DH has already mentioned the wanting to teach our baby about gun safety and how to shoot, when he is old enough. I'm okay with this as my DH is trained in this stuff (military) and wouldn't leave him unsupervised. 

    I would be pretty offended, however, if someone did not allow their child to play at my house because we have guns. I wouldn't mind if someone asked if we guns in the house, but it's not like we would leave them around the house and loaded. We're responsible people. 
    This. 

    I mean, are you also going to inspect friends' homes to make sure they have cleaning products/chemicals put away and locks on cabinets? Or baby gates/locks on steps & doors? I don't think there's anything wrong with having a conversation about guns with someone watching your child, but as long as the person is storing responsibly, I don't see the issue. BUT, to each their own. 
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    julybaby17-2kat0607stokesm21
  • Ohhhh so many things I never thought of, weirdly! My family has always been so responsible about gun ownership. My x military father keeps all his guns and knives locked away, out of reach of little ones. It's something we talk about and have open conversations about. I have guns in my home, also! We are so anal about gun safety that the bullets are not even in the same safe as the guns. Totally separate safes. Like someone mentioned above, I somehow forget not everyone is serious about gun safety!!!! ALSO, drugs/medicine, cleaning supplies/chemicals, alcohol, pool safety......so many life threatening hazards in houses!!!! 

  • @Adabyron thanks for chiming in too.  Just curious, would it bother you if your child were playing at someone else's house where they had firearms?  Or are you more relaxed about it because you have one? 
    This is a difficult question. To put it bluntly, I think if your guns are not stored properly (unloaded, in a safe, ammunition locked up in a separate location) you're an idiot. With the exception of law enforcement officers. Whether there are children around or not, that is how guns should be stored. My dad always had guns growing up, and he was a complete nut about gun safety. I still to this day do not know where he kept his guns in our childhood home. Now, he has an entire safe room in the basement (think like a bank vault - also doubles as a storm shelter), and two different gun safes inside the safe room to lock up guns and ammo separately. He taught us about gun safety from a young age. He took red paint and painted a little "safety" switch on all our toy guns, and we weren't allowed to point toy guns at each other. I was taught to fear/respect guns. My goal is to raise my kid the same way, so that if he did come across a gun at someone else's house he would know not to touch it and to tell an adult. We have a while before we have to worry about this, because I don't foresee playdates at someone's house without us for several years. 

    If I became aware that someone had loaded guns casually lying around their house, I would not let my kid go there. I would also probably not want to be friends with that person. But if I trust someone's judgement in general, I would assume they have taken precautions to keep guns out of the hands of kids. Especially if they had kids as well. If it was a childless adult that was going to be keeping my kid at their house, I would probably ask. But I can't think of anyone that would watch him that I wouldn't already know that about.

    TL;DR: guns are not evil, but gun safety is very important
    caribbeanmama-2kat0607
  • XathXath member
    Eighth Anniversary 1000 Comments 500 Love Its Photogenic
    Ugh.  We left our handgun with friends in the US when we moved, but we'll get it back (and have to deal with it) when we go back.  I'm completely fine with keeping firearms secured safely, unloaded, and separate from any ammunition source.  My H and I are looking into getting a rifle from a family member; in our conversation we determined that we'd store it disassembled AND separate from the ammo.

    The hiccup for me is the handgun.  My H sees it as our home defense weapon, and as such wants to store it in the bedside safe WITH ammo.  I'm not sure how comfortable I am with that.  (I'm not sure how comfortable I am using a .45 in a townhouse either.  Those bullets can go through so many walls).  So we'll have to have that conversation again before we retake custody of the firearm.  
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  • @satsumasandlemons I'm interested in your experience - under what circumstances do you ask about gun ownership?  Is it only when a child is involved or do you bring it up before going to someone's house in general?

    @ktewart I so appreciate the thoughtful reply  <3 <3 <3 I just love this board so much and have missed you guyz!  I don't have a lot of experience with this topic.  And am really unsure about how to navigate this socially. As you said, I really don't want to insult or offend anyone.  I never thought I would have to have these sorts of conversations.  (I know it sounds very naive but I just never translated the politics of the polarizing gun debate into the real life logistics of who are our neighbors and associates and what does it mean for our day to day interactions.) Your response made me burst into tears because it validated that my feelings were not crazy.  (My husband thinks overall it is not a big deal and that since people can own guns you should expect that they have them and that it is what it is. This led to a big disagreement but I'm glad that we are having these conversations to sort out where we stand.  He is going along with my decision but just doesn't feel as strongly about it.)  It is so reassuring to hear that as a gun owner you don't think it's nuts to ask and to be on top of questioning the specifics of how they are stored etc.  I can certainly see some people thinking it's their private business and being defensive, which I guess is why it's awkward to bring up. Anyways, you put into words what I was afraid to say aloud because I adore our nanny... We don't have family near by and she is our emergency contact!  We don't have a formal/strict employer/employee relationship.  But, I do think it really was irresponsible of her to not let me know and that realization has fractured something in the relationship for me.
    BusyZeeOperaSingerMommy
  • DcwtadaDcwtada member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary Photogenic
    DH and I are not against guns although we wouldn't own one ourselves. Where we live there are questionable people around specifically a neighborhood 5 miles out that is known for violence and murder - even Oprah gave up on them.

    We have security alarms, cameras and two pitbull-mastiff mixes (who are wouldn't hurt anyone but randoms don't know that) and a Shepard mix that would - we didn't raise her that way she was a rescue dog but she takes her guard dog duty seriously. One of our pitbull-mastiff mixes is blind (another rescue) and is hyper-vigilant about alerting us to any noise, which is 99% of the time a plastic bag caught on the fence or a car door a block over. But no one will ever sneak or dare breaking into our house especially hearing him bark even if all he'd do is lick them and ask for treats. 





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  • rae1-3rae1-3 member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    AdaByron said:

    This is a difficult question. To put it bluntly, I think if your guns are not stored properly (unloaded, in a safe, ammunition locked up in a separate location) you're an idiot. With the exception of law enforcement officers. Whether there are children around or not, that is how guns should be stored. My dad always had guns growing up, and he was a complete nut about gun safety. I still to this day do not know where he kept his guns in our childhood home. Now, he has an entire safe room in the basement (think like a bank vault - also doubles as a storm shelter), and two different gun safes inside the safe room to lock up guns and ammo separately. He taught us about gun safety from a young age. He took red paint and painted a little "safety" switch on all our toy guns, and we weren't allowed to point toy guns at each other. I was taught to fear/respect guns. My goal is to raise my kid the same way, so that if he did come across a gun at someone else's house he would know not to touch it and to tell an adult. We have a while before we have to worry about this, because I don't foresee playdates at someone's house without us for several years. 

    If I became aware that someone had loaded guns casually lying around their house, I would not let my kid go there. I would also probably not want to be friends with that person. But if I trust someone's judgement in general, I would assume they have taken precautions to keep guns out of the hands of kids. Especially if they had kids as well. If it was a childless adult that was going to be keeping my kid at their house, I would probably ask. But I can't think of anyone that would watch him that I wouldn't already know that about.

    TL;DR: guns are not evil, but gun safety is very important
    I respectfully disagree with this. If there was ever a situation where I needed to use my gun (i.e. a break-in), I am pretty sure the intruder isn't going to wait for me to get my gun, find the ammo (stored separately) and loan the gun. DH and I both keep our handguns in our respective nightstands (loaded - but not chambered). There are also a few other guns in his closet that we keep loaded. And we keep one loaded on top of one of the kitchen cabinets. Obviously, things will have to change once our LO arrives (and we have talked about it). 
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  • AdaByronAdaByron member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments Name Dropper Photogenic
    edited March 17
    Rae1 said:
    AdaByron said:

    This is a difficult question. To put it bluntly, I think if your guns are not stored properly (unloaded, in a safe, ammunition locked up in a separate location) you're an idiot. With the exception of law enforcement officers. Whether there are children around or not, that is how guns should be stored. My dad always had guns growing up, and he was a complete nut about gun safety. I still to this day do not know where he kept his guns in our childhood home. Now, he has an entire safe room in the basement (think like a bank vault - also doubles as a storm shelter), and two different gun safes inside the safe room to lock up guns and ammo separately. He taught us about gun safety from a young age. He took red paint and painted a little "safety" switch on all our toy guns, and we weren't allowed to point toy guns at each other. I was taught to fear/respect guns. My goal is to raise my kid the same way, so that if he did come across a gun at someone else's house he would know not to touch it and to tell an adult. We have a while before we have to worry about this, because I don't foresee playdates at someone's house without us for several years. 

    If I became aware that someone had loaded guns casually lying around their house, I would not let my kid go there. I would also probably not want to be friends with that person. But if I trust someone's judgement in general, I would assume they have taken precautions to keep guns out of the hands of kids. Especially if they had kids as well. If it was a childless adult that was going to be keeping my kid at their house, I would probably ask. But I can't think of anyone that would watch him that I wouldn't already know that about.

    TL;DR: guns are not evil, but gun safety is very important
    I respectfully disagree with this. If there was ever a situation where I needed to use my gun (i.e. a break-in), I am pretty sure the intruder isn't going to wait for me to get my gun, find the ammo (stored separately) and loan the gun. DH and I both keep our handguns in our respective nightstands (loaded - but not chambered). There are also a few other guns in his closet that we keep loaded. And we keep one loaded on top of one of the kitchen cabinets. Obviously, things will have to change once our LO arrives (and we have talked about it). 
    Yes, we will have to agree to disagree. Because keeping loaded handguns at arms reach is insane to me. It would be a hard no with a child in the house. But I have always viewed guns as recreational, not for protection. Ours is stored in our master bedroom closet, so if there was an intruder in the middle of the night, I do think we would have time to get to it. But that possibility is just not even on my radar.

    ETA when I was growing up, gun thefts were common. So that was another main reason for keeping them locked up, and may have skewed my opinion. We were also not allowed to ever tell anyone that my dad owned guns, because it could make us a target for a break-in. I still get a little uncomfortable if DH mentions it to someone we don't know well.
    virginiaunicorn11
  • rae1-3rae1-3 member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    @adabyron Understandable, and to each their own. Gun control/safety is one of those issues where there is always going to be disagreement and I respect everyone's point of view. This is our first child so obviously that hasn't been a concern yet. But things will definitely be changing come July and everything will be locked up. 
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    kat0607
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