The Things People Say

JNR6510

Let's hear it ladies...

What crazy, funny, irritating, or just plain odd comments have you gotten?

JNR6510

One of ladies in my office asked if I was pregnant last week. When I confirmed we were, she replied with, "I thought you were looking fatter." Thank you lady. That is exactly what a pregnant woman wants to hear.

mrs_tacos

-"Congratulations, how far along are you? Oh...I didn't think people showed this soon."
-"Oh, how nice. We just assumed you didn't want kids since you've been married so long without them." (We've had this same moment from not one but two people. I just wanted to scream at them that it took us over 4 years to get pregnant, but thank for the assumption.)
-"Was it planned? You don't seem very happy." (It's hard to feel happy when you just puked for the fourth time that day, but thank you for the assessment.)
-"Oh. You guys just don't seem like kid type people." 

Becky012016

"You know how that happens right?" -rando, we look young but really aren't that young

"Well you never know what could happen..." -SIL when we told her after 14 weeks along with DS

wyomama0427

I've shared this before but I was very giant and 39 weeks pregnant with DS when one guy looked at me all nasty in a gas station once and asked "You know how that happens right?" And I told him "Yeah a happy marriage and lots of sex." And it felt good but I was still really upset and cried when I got back to the truck. 

MadisonInspires

Had a family friend pull my SO aside and warn him that I will have no time and will totally abandon him after the baby is here. 
Get bent. You know nothing about my relationship. 

Inanigloo

My dad after we told him that we were going to tell our daughter about being a big sister at 16-17 weeks. "I wouldn't tell her so soon. I'd wait till at least 20 weeks. Just incase something happens." Thanks for the comforting words there dad. 

beccam1230

Not terribly unusual, but with my first, told an acquaintance that I was pregnant.. he responded with "oh yeah? Were you trying?" Well I don't believe it's any of your business whether my husband and I were having sex for a purpose or just for fun. Thanks for asking though...

mrsvp614

I'm 14 weeks and already have people telling me "please tell me you're getting an epidural. It's not like you get a gold star if you don't." 
I've also loved hearing "you guys didn't waste any time," or "that was fast" because we got KU 3 months after our wedding. But we're both 30 and have been together for more than 6 years, so we're ready. 
And my favorite, after revealing my due date "Uh, being pregnant in the summer is the worst. You're going to be miserable." 

DPandMB

beccam1230 said:

Not terribly unusual, but with my first, told an acquaintance that I was pregnant.. he responded with "oh yeah? Were you trying?" Well I don't believe it's any of your business whether my husband and I were having sex for a purpose or just for fun. Thanks for asking though...

I got this all the time with my last pregnancy and have had it several times now. I have two older kids. They are technically step kids, but they both live with us and I don't refer to them any differently. So they were 10 and 15 when DD was born. No one could comprehend how that would happen on purpose. Now with this baby being number 4, no one understands why you would want so many kids. 

Ive also gotten 
- "will you be done now?"
-"oh wow you're only x amount of weeks?" 
- "wow you have longer to go than I thought you would" 

sugarrush

"Being pregnant during the summer is the wooorrrrsssst.  You are going to be so miserable."  News flash, I was pretty miserable being pregnant during the winter trying to find coats that fit for -25 temperature!

"You think you are tired with one? Two is going to be soooo hard."
"You're going to be missing out on all the fun with all these weddings coming up"
"You look terrible, are you feeling ok?" 

sarahufl

We haven't really told very many people, but this annoys the crap out of me. DD is 11 months old and is super chill and easygoing. And EVERYONE feels the need to tell me that our 2nd kid is going to be terrible. Um, ok- thanks?

BookitBoo

"Why would you want another one? You already have one of each!"
"You're going to breastfeed, right?" 
"How did this happen? Was it an accident?"

  

BigBadWolf12

Not this pregnancy, but the last one.  We live overseas and found out we were KU on summer holidays visiting Canada. I told BFF right away because I wanted to in person and she knew we had been trying for 8 months by that point. I said, "I'm KU, so if all goes well, we'll have a baby in mid March!" and she goes, "yea, well, it's still early". uhm, thanks...it did end in loss, and I felt like I couldn't ask for any support from her because of that comment.

kelseyrayay

I really don't get upset over a comment someone makes because usually they don't mean anything by it. But When I was 30 weeks pregnant with DS this lady said oh what a cute bump. How far a long are you. So because I'm a awful person I was like I'm not pregnant. Her face was priceless but then I said no I'm just kidding 30 weeks lol 

Souptin

last time my very proper British coworker decided to tell me her daughter in law had explosive diarrhea her entire pregnancy and asked if I  had been suffering such afflictions..... ummm my butthole, my business. Seriously. 

wyomama0427

We get the "Were you trying?" comment a lot too, both with DS and with this one. My sister actually asked if this one was an oops.... Also we got pregnant 8 days after we got married and when we finally announced at 14 weeks everyone was like "Wow you got that done fast!" And while yes we did get pregnant shortly after we got married, we had still been trying for nine months prior to our wedding month. It took us a while to conceive DS, I think mostly due to the Nexplanon that wrecked my body and my hormones for two years. But it's just irritating when people make comments like that because you never know someone's situation!

Also, during my first pregnancy my sister used to call me "fatty" a lot. She's got two kids. And yet every time she saw me, "Oh hey fatty! Wow you're looking fatter! Stand up straight fatty!" It was really awful. 

jena333-2

I shared this on twatwaffle Tuesday, but here it is again

(12w1d) I have an US picture at my desk, and a coworker came over and said, "We were talking last night, and there's no way that baby is 2 months along, it looks like it's about to be born."

I said, well, 1) I'm just about 3 months. And 2) baby is mostly formed and just needs to grow bigger.

"Well your baby is going to be huge."

---------------------------

And then this gem: I went to get a lumbar support pillow from the ergonomics lady and nurse a couple weeks ago. She said, "and why do you need that?" 

"I'm 11 weeks pregnant."

"well **WE** didn't do that to you... hope you had a good time getting there."

...........uhhhhhhhh, I did, thanks?... I just stared at them.

jdarlin2012

When I announced to my research group, one guy said "Oh shit!" It was dead silent for a minute then he asked "were you trying?"  All I could do was laugh! 

An older lady at work assumed I would become a stay at home mom after this child. When I told her I was looking for a career position (I'm currently in an internship), she asked "who's going to raise your kids?" 

DPandMB

I appreciate reading everyone's comments. This whole thread makes me shake my head. Its like people lose their filter around pregnant women.

PS Job well done to all of us for not killing someone yet.

Becky012016

@daniellelynette we got the "were you pregnant at the wedding?!" Comments along with the that didn't take long comments. My side was thrilled. DH uppity extended family was incredulous. I gave birth exactly 9.5 months after the wedding. My tww was the honeymoon. 

wyomama0427

@Becky012016 I would have lost my mind if someone asked me if I was pregnant at the wedding lol that's so inappropriate! I was waiting for someone to ask if we got married because I was pregnant or something. I would have gladly told them that Aunt Flo was actually visiting the day I got married. Ask inappropriate questions get inappropriate answers!!

thinkpositive2017

"Are your midwives even doctors? You should go to my OBGYN." 

They are Certified Nurse-Midwives, the office is 5 minutes from my house, and I've been going to them for annual exams since I was 14.

But, thanks.

zetega

TW?...

After I lost my first pregnancy this past fall at 7 weeks, my MIL told my husband it must have been because we were buying a house at the same time and "she has been so stressed." Gee, thanks for blaming me!

Hah, guess this could have gone in the in-laws thread too. In all honesty she is (normally) a wonderful person and I don't have much to complain about, but that was pretty horrifying. 

wyomama0427

@zetega wooooooowwww..... that's not okay..

@thinkpositive2017 wow! That's ridiculous! I can't believe people actually say that kind of thing... wow.

thinkpositive2017

@daniellelynette Right? She is a close friend and had good intentions, but it was still a major eyeroll. 

wyomama0427

@thinkpositive2017 it just blows my mind that people think they can have a say in what kind of prenatal care a woman chooses! Or what kind of birth they have. I mean really lol. 

sugarrush

@BookitBoo omg yessss the breastfeeding warriors.   Huge eye rolls!!!!  My boobs, my baby, my business, beyotchs! 

LuckyPenny1231

Hopefully it's a boy, it better be a boy, maybe this is finally your boy....blah blah blah 

We didn't have another baby to have a boy. We just wanted another baby, we aren't trying for a boy. What are we going to do if it's another girl, give it back? 

Inanigloo

@daniellelynette Oh I'd be livid with your sister for the fatty comment. I can't even imagine in what world she thinks that's okay. 

wyomama0427

@Inanigloo oh I know! It was so hurtful. She's always been like that though and my whole life I've been afraid to stand up to her, the last time I did we got in a huge fight and she didn't talk to me for months. 

jena333-2

zetega said:

TW?...

After I lost my first pregnancy this past fall at 7 weeks, my MIL told my husband it must have been because we were buying a house at the same time and "she has been so stressed." Gee, thanks for blaming me!

Hah, guess this could have gone in the in-laws thread too. In all honesty she is (normally) a wonderful person and I don't have much to complain about, but that was pretty horrifying. 

When I told my aunt about our loss, she immediately said, "NO ONE on our side of the family has had a miscarriage, what about Ross's side?" 1)that's statistically unlikely - you probably just didn't hear about it, and 2)no one is to blame.

mrsmarygs

So idk if I should post it here or in FFFC, but I've actually said a few of these to pregnant ladies before I was pregnant, not realizing how I sound. I told one lady sorry after she found out she was pregnant with her 5th boy. And once I told one of my friends who got pregnant on their honeymoon that they moved fast. 

*hides in shame*

DPandMB

@jena333 and @zetega anyone that says anything besides sorry after a loss should just STFU.

baileylove22

I have had a couple losses previously. During my last pregnancy I told my mom I was going to look at cribs and she told me "it's still early, make sure they have a return policy if this whole thing doesn't work out".  

labby18

DH has told people at his work, as he kinda has to explain why he will be missing for dr appointments etc. No biggie. But here's the kicker. Our due date is September 17th...which means DH gave me a Christmas present we can't "open" until later, right? Then on January 4th he left for 2.5 months to California for training...the responses people are giving him are ridiculous. "Congratulations, but you haven't been home?", "How? We've been in California"...PEOPLE HE KNOCKED ME UP BEFORE HE LEFT!!! 

sarahufl

When I was pregnant with DD, literally every time I saw my MIL she would ask me if I was peeing a lot. The first few times she asked, I sort of brushed it off, but I finally got sick of it when she asked me at dinner with the whole family sitting at the table- and I snapped at her. Why the *F* do you need to talk about my bathroom habits at all, but especially in front of your entire family?

Sugargirl1019

@daniellelynette I am appalled!!! You poor thing! 

@BigBadWolf12 I think I rememeber you mentioning that.. what a terrible friend. 

@baileylove22 All the comments about pregnancies ending instead!! Ahhhh! Why must they say that?

BookitBoo

When I had my miscarriage I can't tell you how many people told me "I'm so glad it was sooner rather than later." "I'm sorry, but it was at least before you had time to get attached." GTF out of here, I had been praying for another baby for a year and I was damn sure attached. 

wannabeamongoose

@BigBadWolf12 It breaks my heart when close friends say such insensitive things. I hope you had plenty of other support.

@souptin My butthole. My business. I'm dying laughing right now!

@thinkpositive2017 I've definitely had my share of comments about seeing a CNM instead of an OB. It's one of those things where people judge what they don't get.

The other day a friend was answering questions about her birth (another of our friends is KU and is weirdly curious about the tiny details of everyone's story). She said "Oh of course I had an epidural. I have nothing to prove." She immediately looked at me like I was going to defend my decision to go med free. I said "For the record, I totally had something to prove."

lap018

The epidural thing, I don't know how or why it's anyone's business? I wanted to try going med free with DS and that's what I told everyone, that I wanted to try it and that I was going to give it a real shot (of course I ended up being induced at 41+1 and when maxed out on pitocin with my waters broken and stuck in the bed the entire time for penicillin for GBS and continuous fetal monitoring I did get an epidural and it was fuckin amaze balls! I'll probably try to go med free again but that birth plan went right out the window with DS!) anyways everyone always responded with "oh you'll get one" or "why would you not get one?" Or "hahahahaha oh trust me you'll end up with one " like I just told you I wanted to TRY it for the love of everything people, it's not your business anyways!