Intro

Chrissycarrell

2 days ago, my husband and I drove to our doctors office with bleeding, discharge, and heavy abdominal cramping. After several days of doctors telling me to rest and hydrate they checked my cervix and I was fully dilated at 20 weeks. I will never forget the moment the doctor told us we would probably lose our baby...Immediately I was rushed up to L&D and put in trendiliburg for the next 6 hours before delivering our beautiful baby boy, Wes Michael. Although it was a devastating day, I feel so blessed that my husband and I got three hours to hold him before he passed away. 

We are home now and figuring out how to navigate our new "normal"...I have a couple weeks off of work to recover from the D&C which is good to be able to have time to grieve..our lives seem so empty now. My belly is empty and the nursery is empty. I don't really have a specific question, just feeling isolated and alone and am not really ready to talk about it with friends or family at this point in time.  

GhanimaAtreides

Hugs. I am so sorry for your loss. It's ok to hole up for a bit and process everything away from anyone else.

rainbowwishes5

I am so sorry for your loss. You are not alone. We are right here with you in your pain. It's very hard to talk about and people may react in strange ways. I have lost friends and family members because they couldn't cope with my losses. Please brace yourself for any possibility. But always you can vent here. I am sorry to say 'welcome.'

NYTino24

@chrissycarrell I am so sorry for what you went through. Wes Michael has a lot of company. We are here for you!

justsuzie

So sorry this happened to you. This new normal will change your life but you have control on how. First, take time to grieve. Then, when you are ready you will navigate how best works for you. I was devestated after my loss but eventually I was able to cope and it has changed me for the better. I did a lot of self reflection and made changes in my life based on a new meaning of importance. I will always miss my baby. I also made the choice to try very hard to not let the loss change me for the worse. Even though things suck right now know that it doesn't feel unbearable forever. Best wishes to you. 

splashmountain

@Chrissycarrell I am so very sorry for your loss. I understand how difficult it is to talk about with people irl and being on here and the ttcal board has helped tremendously. Take as long as you need to grieve.

rklinge0

I am so sorry for your loss. Each loss and situation is different so even though about a third of your IRL friends have experienced it. It is not the same.