Flame Free Friday Confessions

Mommyofcarson+1

Alright, It is only 3:30 in the afternoon, and you guys managed to get the first one shut down. Can we move on and just have fun with this please? Be nice and share the playground ladies. That was a joke, not being serious! 

anitamargarita_82

WK also thank you 

Mommyofcarson+1

You callin' me out, huh? 

ETA I have my opinion, doesn't make me a WK.

LuLiLaEv

CarsonsMommy said:

Alright, It is only 3:30 in the afternoon, and you guys managed to get the first one shut down. Can we move on and just have fun with this please? Be nice and share the playground ladies.

Yeah, cause that's really going to make people want to post on this thread...

glitterfish-2

You guys?

Mommyofcarson+1

I was kidding!!! Idk how to gif!

RunRestRepeat

Why do I feel like I'm being scolded? Oh, wait...

Mommyofcarson+1

So hard to convey a joking tone on here, but that was me kidding, sorry it came across as snarky, I was part of it too!

mrscate88

It's only 2:30 here! 

FFFC: I dislike breastfeeding and I'm really not looking forward to it with this next baby. 

I just weaned my first baby at 14 months, it was the hardest year of my life. My body fought me, my baby fought me. It was just sucky 90% of the time and just "okay" the other 10%

No endorphins flowing, no weight loss really, no magical bond, nada. I made the sacrifice because I was capable of doing it and knew it was best for my daughter...BUT I totally understand why some women quit in those early days!! 

glitterfish-2

mrscate88 said:

It's only 2:30 here! 

FFFC: I dislike breastfeeding and I'm really not looking forward to it with this next baby. 

I just weaned my first baby at 14 months, it was the hardest year of my life. My body fought me, my baby fought me. It was just sucky 90% of the time and just "okay" the other 10%

No endorphins flowing, no weight loss really, no magical bond, nada. I made the sacrifice because I was capable of doing it and knew it was best for my daughter...BUT I totally understand why some women quit in those early days!! 

Darn, I was only thinking of doing it for weight loss and to save money. Hmm, I guess we'll see how it goes! 

mrscate88

@GlitterFish haha, well hopefully your BFing luck is better than mine. I didn't gain weight, so that's a plus, and I did save money! 

Itsnotyourturn

FFFC- I don't think I'm going to BF.  I'll give it a try but if it's a struggle, it'll be formula. All the respect for those that do, but not my jam.

glitterfish-2

@mrscate88 I'm really not even into the idea at all! My sister tells me I won't be so icked out by it when it's my own baby, but I'm not so sure!

It doesn't help that lately my cheapness has flown out the window in favor of "make life as easy as possible"! 

Sigh, poor kid!

yellow1daisy

Yeah the weight loss thing doesn't work that way for everybody. I was 5 pounds away from prepregnancy after I had my daughter. After a few months of breastfeeding, I went up 30 pounds!! It made me unbelievably hungry but yeah that's about it...thankfully I lost that weight before getting pregnant again but dear lord I hope I don't go through the same thing again. I'm with @mrscate88 in the oh boy do I wish I didn't have to breastfeed again.
I also totally weaned at 14 months (though I was supplementing for most of our BF relationship), and hope my parenting experience the first year isn't ruined due to BF again. Though, honestly, with a toddler running around I don't think I could keep up with all the crap I was doing hoping to get a few more oz of milk the last time. 

Edit: words are hard. 

dancegurl1118

Breastfeeding and pumping was the worst. The worst. It consumed my day every day. Obsessing about amounts, her weight, feeding, clogged ducts, pump parts. 

That being said I'm cheap, and lost all my pregnancy weight and then 20 more lbs, so I'll hopefully being doing it all again. 

ETA: i also had a nice case of PPD so I'm sure tht contributed to the weight loss 

mamadcb

I realize I have had a very good run with breastfeeding (no real discomfort or supply issues) so my opinion of it is certainly informed by my own experience, but I do want to offer another perspective to moms on the fence about BF. I really enjoy it. It's always ready without prep, I get to sit and rest with my little guy while he nurses, it's cheap! and it's a unique time that only he and I share. I do not mean to suggest that formula is bad or that everyone's BF experience will be like mine-- only that it CAN be great, so (just like everything else in pregnancy/parenting) it might be worth seeing how it goes for you and deciding from there. 

mrscate88

Itsnotyourturn said:

FFFC- I don't think I'm going to BF.  I'll give it a try but if it's a struggle, it'll be formula. All the respect for those that do, but not my jam.

Yeah a mother's sanity is important too! 

mrscate88

GlitterFish said:

@mrscate88 I'm really not even into the idea at all! My sister tells me I won't be so icked out by it when it's my own baby, but I'm not so sure!

It doesn't help that lately my cheapness has flown out the window in favor of "make life as easy as possible"! 

Sigh, poor kid!

Baby will be totally fine, and there's nothing wrong with making life as easy as possible. Sometimes, BFing is the easier thing (baby catches on fast, not very painful, no bottles to clean, no formula to lug around etc etc). But sometimes, that's just not the case! And I made myself crazy trying to be perfect the first time around. Don't do that. 

chiquita928

The first 2-3 weeks of BFing SUCKED for me.  Then it got 1000x easier, and I was so glad at how inexpensive and easy it was.  Pumping and constantly making sure there was enough milk in the freezer was stressful, though.  I also gained weight from being super hungry, so that was a bummer.  We made it to 15 mos before stopping on doctor's advice (DS was only nursing in the middle of the night, for no real reason).  I will be BFing again, and I will probably not use formula, but that's only because I know how to BF it now.  I'm still not looking forward to pumping.  I only wish I would have cut myself some slack about formula the first time...I had to go away for a three day weekend when DS was 9 mos, and pumping that much milk in addition to the regular bottles was too much.

AdaByron

I sucked at keeping up today. I have a lot to catch up on with the first thread, but I'll chime in here. 

I loved breastfeeding. I thought it was so much more convenient than formula. I liked never having to pack bottles when we left the house, and not having bottles to wash for the first 3 months when I was on leave. Also, I did lose weight, and enjoyed the bonding time.

But I HATED pumping. With a burning passion. And since 75% of what he ate was from a bottle at DC, I decided around 7-8 months it was worth my sanity to quit pumping and send formula bottles. I could still nurse morning and night for a while after that, but once he started STTN my supply dropped quick and I weaned completely by about 10 months. I have no regrets.

chiquita928

@AdaByron Sometimes I really wish that's what I had done.

Twinkiedoll

My FFFC from reading the last thread is that I use OTC salicylic acid acne treatment on my chin all the time.  My doctor said it's fine and that there's no evidence it's bad for the baby. 

Mommyofcarson+1

@twinkiedoll Salicylic acid is derived from willowbark, and is in the same family as aspirin. And, since it is topical, I am in camp "it's okay every once in awhile". Aspirin is mostly avoided in pregnancy because of its blood thinning effect. A little on a pimple won't hurt at all, your baby won't come out with two heads. I think people overeact sometimes.

Edited because somehow overreact turned into overeat 

chiquita928

@Xath I'm also re-hooked to Pokemon Go...didn't get the chance to comment before the thread was closed.  I really miss my big grey game boy, though.

shelley423russ

Yep. My first is 21 months and finally weaned (mostly). I have hated it since the beginning. I told DH not to pressure me if I didn't BF this time around. 

cssme13

I hated BF'ing with both kids and honestly am dreading it this time around. It was the absolute most painful uncomfortable experience and I had such a huge amount of guilt for wanting to quit that I stuck it out longer than I wanted to. 

satsumasandlemons

okay I have a bf/pumping confession too. I wasn't a big fan of bf'ing and did not feel the euphoric effects of oxytocin - just that let down feeling. But it was convenient and I was a freaking pumping producer because I had the right pumping situation - a lockable, secure office and I ate all the right food - steel cut oatmeal every morning, lots of kale, etc etc etc. I didn't care about losing weight because I was so focused on getting to a year mark. 

This time? Ugh, i'm really dreading it. 

ETA: The "right" pumping situation isn't limited to only the right work environment and diet, but most importantly, my boobs produced milk. 

nktrodden826

I'm a little late but I also love breastfeeding so much. Not only convenient but saved so much money which was important while we adjusted to living on one income! I'm still nursing my 20 month old son three-four times a day although teething sucks and the hormones make me super sensitive to it now I really love the bond. But no judging at all on formula mamas as long as you feed your baby whatever works!!! I also bow down to exclusively pumping mamas- I don't know how you do it! 

mj8215

Sorry for changing the subject but @CapricaAndrea reminded me of a good fffc I have:  I'm a total sci-fi nerd. Specifically, classic scifi literature including, but not limited to, Isaac Asimov and Stanislaw Lem; aaaaand Star Trek. And BSG. But especially Star Trek. 

star_beagle

@mj8215 - Yeay! Another sci-fi nerd besides me!

rojita-2

FFFC - we just had our gender reveal today and I am totally ridden with guilt. When we had our anatomy scan we asked the tech to write the sex in an envelope and we had a cake baked so that we would find out with our entire family. The evening was so lovely and the cake worked beautifully though when we found out we're having another little boy, my immediate reaction was a little sad. Don't get me wrong I am so happy baby is healthy and I love DS1 so so much I'm sure that having another little guy will be just as wonderful plus we already have everything.... but.... I am still sad that we won't get to use our perfect little girl's name, there won't be any little tutu's or bows, nor any mummy-and-me mani's down the road... I feel awful for feeling this way but I confess I do. 

Xath

@chiquita928  Yeah, it really gives me that nostalgia fix.  I think I might still have my grey brick floating around somewhere.  I know I have my lime green pocket color.

@mj8215 Me too!  What's your favorite Trek series?  (I promise I will only judge-hate you slightly if it isn't the same as mine.... )

shanana_3

FFFC - I seriously only show up once a week to read the weekly baby size and see if any posts have been closed, for the most part those are the only ones I read. Nice to see I wasn't disappointed today

nktrodden826

@rojita I haven't mentioned my sadness after finding out we're having a girl because I've read so many people say "just be happy they're healthy" but I wanted 2 boys SO BADLY. The ultrasound tech told us that she's very healthy and for that I couldn't be any happier but I got into the car and cried all the way home. I understand what you're feeling and eventually this feeling of guilt and sadness will go away but know you're not the only one who feels this way. 

chamomile-2

My feelings about gender disappointment after years as part of both the infertility and pregnancy loss communities...

mj8215

@Xath I'd have to say DS9 > TNG > ENT >>> TOS. I love the complexity created in the DS9 world, and the optimism of TNG. I think I like ENT more than most people do. TOS never worked for me. 
Re movies, I agree with the popular opinion that even > odd. I don't mind the new movies as much as many others do, but I do wish their expectations of viewers' intelligence were higher, and plots were less flat (especially the most recent one).
I'm very excited for the new series launching in May. Very

Don't quote me on that but I'm pretty sure my choice of radiology/ molecular imaging  had something to do with the fact that it's the medical subspecialty that feels closest to the CMO job (handheld MRI + nanoparticle imaging in a few years = early medical tricorder) 

ETA: what's your ranking and why? 

ljd2010

Before the gender disappointment flaming begins, I just want to throw in my two cents. Obviously, as @Rojita acknowledged, everyone's shared goal is a healthy baby. But people also have certain ideas and ways that they've imagined their family forming. Sometimes it's all boys or girls, or maybe a mix, and I don't think there's anything wrong with acknowledging that sometimes reality doesn't match up with what we imagined. I don't think it makes anyone less grateful for the precious gift of life we've been given, though I realize that some people may take the disappointment to a flame worthy level and for some people, the sex of their baby is the least of their concerns. As previous posters have said, people may be disappointed at an ultrasound but no one is disappointed in the delivery room. 

ljd2010

Also @Xath and @mj8215 my husband and I are obsessed with DS9! My water broke after watching Dax and Worf's wedding, so that episode has a special place in our hearts. Sooo nerdy but not ashamed. 

LoveLee85

Itsnotyourturn said:

FFFC- I don't think I'm going to BF.  I'll give it a try but if it's a struggle, it'll be formula. All the respect for those that do, but not my jam.

With my first, I killed myself trying to get milk to come in(it never did), we were at the doctor every day or every other day for weigh checks and crap. I would pump for HOURS AND HOURS in a row to get half an ounce. Kept this up for one whole month that felt like 3 years. I will not do this again. I feel so much better knowing that I will have bottles and formula at home waiting for the same issue. And I will not hesitate to start formula feeding the second we are home from the hospital! It made breastfeeding this horrible thing in my mind, I think I'll try again. I'm not really sure, but I'm giving myself that freedom of choice. Yay. 

Xath

mj8215 said:

@Xath I'd have to say DS9 > TNG > ENT >>> TOS. I love the complexity created in the DS9 world, and the optimism of TNG. I think I like ENT more than most people do. TOS never worked for me. 
Re movies, I agree with the popular opinion that even > odd. I don't mind the new movies as much as many others do, but I do wish their expectations of viewers' intelligence were higher, and plots were less flat (especially the most recent one).
I'm very excited for the new series launching in May. Very

Don't quote me on that but I'm pretty sure my choice of radiology/ molecular imaging  had something to do with the fact that it's the medical subspecialty that feels closest to the CMO job (handheld MRI + nanoparticle imaging in a few years = early medical tricorder) 

ETA: what's your ranking and why? 

@mj8215 Almost identical I think.  DS9 is my favorite; it has the best character development and overall plot hands down.  TNG is my next favorite, though I don't recommend going back and watching season 1 again.  I don't know if I'd put Voyager before or after Enterprise; I know it's not the best but it has a special place in my heart-- The Doctor is one of my favorite characters in any series.  I also could never really get into TOS.

I enjoy the new movies for what they are and I'm looking forward to the new series too.  I guess I'll have to shell out for a CBS all access pass...

A nerd FFFC:  In 5th grade I dressed up as Captain Picard for Halloween, complete with bald cap.  I wore it to the elementary school dance and my "boyfriend" wouldn't be seen anywhere near me.  I can't imagine why...

smallbutmighty77

So I'm going to throw in my 2c on the gender disappointment thing as I have a different perspective. I am a girl, my mother wanted a boy. I have an older sister. My mother told me about how she cried so hard when the doctor told her I was a girl. She called my dad and he thought something was wrong with the baby.

Having this reaction, to each their own. just don't tell your child on a frequent enough basis that they seriously question if your ok with the fact that they aren't the gender you wanted.
I heard the story a lot as a kid, like gee sorry I couldn't control my own gender, do you want me to leave?! to my mom it was funny by then, to me, not so much.