FFFC 2/10/17

NYTino24

'fess up!


*not actually guaranteed to be flame-free*

NYTino24

Some of my clothes are older than my students. Also, they are having the growing up program soon and I'm nervous they're going to ask me about kids soon.

Also, I don't really get wishing kids a happy birthday on FB, especially young ones. They won't see it! My sister messaged me there and asked how I was doing, so I answered and told her I'd update her after my next appointment. She was like fine, we will be here celebrating (nephew's) birthday. She also asked if she should check the mail for a card. Um, I know it's today. Do you know what I've been through lately?!?

adirat

@NYTino24 Wow that is insensitive. Who asks for a gift for their kid? Who? And to someone with what you've been going through? Really? 

LoveInDC

My mind keeps flip flowing between:

"My body is a perfect machine that will give me what I want if I take care of it and give it time."

And

"My body is the devil. Of course it's not going to be easy. What the fuck kind of SS did I think I was? You know there's just something not right going on. Like this is ever going to happen for you without a fight."

jenotontx

NYTino24 said:

She also asked if she should check the mail for a card.

In addition to what adirat said, what kind of passive aggressive BS comment is this? As if she wouldn't "check her mail" anyway? Who doesn't get their mail out of the box on a semi regular basis regardless of what they are expecting? Check your mail always! The postal people appreciate it.  

Edited for spelling

haylsbayls-2

I just finished reading Spark Joy and I fully intend to rip my house apart trying to toss anything that doesn't "spark joy" instead of doing any actual work today 

jess0211

I don't feel like working today. I just don't. Since tomorrow is my bday I have given myself permission to take it easy at work today. This is so not like me and I just don't care. Eta: autocorrect is a b*tch

jenotontx

Went to the Macys down the street from where I work yesterday that is going out of business and almost everything is 50% off. So I clearly HAD to buy some maternity yoga pants! 

zwink1

@jess0211 I am so with you there.  I used my b-day yesterday as an excuse to take today off.  I went to the dentist this morning, am meeting H for lunch, and my sister and mom for dinner, buuuuutttttt that's about it for the day.

beachbunnyxo123

I ate a bag of pirates booty for breakfast today. Zero shits given. 

NYTino24

@JJMNO1616 It's an apartment complex, so she has to walk to it, but still. Andplusalso I flew her and her two sons out to my wedding, paid for hotel, transportation, clothing, and meals... didn't even get a card. 
PS I still wear my maternity leggings even though I'm not KU anymore.
@jess0211 Happy almost birthday!

adirat

@JJMNO1616 That is such a good point! Like she wasn't going to check her mail otherwise? Ugh. 

@loveindc @haylsbayls I see you! 




To be honest, I don't have a FFFC today. I just -- SHOCKINGLY -- had a pleasant experience at the DMV. It took ten minutes and they were so nice to me! Hot tip, go to the DMV the morning after a blizzard apparently!

Bababatty

I've mostly lurked all these threads (besides the IF thread), but I'm jumping in:

@haylsbayls That's my plan for the weekend, too, haha. I got the books from the library a couple months ago, and I just keep renewing them. Sorry other people who might want to borrow them. 

@NYTino24 That is ridiculous of your sister. Ugh. I'm sorry.

Along that line, we started sending money to our nieces and nephews for their birthdays and it's like *crickets.* (Same with Christmas, which are actual presents.) No thank you, not even an acknowledgement that anything was received. These are all teens and preteens perfectly capable of picking up the phone or sending a text or whatever. I don't even care about the thank you card. I'd just like to know they got it. I'm going to be stepping down our birthday game and definitely training our future kids in gift receiving etiquette.

jess0211

@zwink1 happy belated birthday!!!!!

aggo

@jess0211 Literally, same. My bday is also tomorrow and I want nothing to do with work right now. Unfortunately a bunch of stuff came up but you can bet I'm not jumping out of my chair to do it. 

Also, a part of me really thought I'd be pregnant on my birthday. Lol to that. 

Everycol0r

My aunt deleted me today over a political debate in which I only stated non-bias facts. I am very pleased with myself, I've got some political street cred now. 

adirat

ag90 said:

Also, a part of me really thought I'd be pregnant on my birthday. Lol to that. 

Saaaaaame.

lulu1180

This is me today.  I can't stop.  Someone please send help....

adirat

@lulu1180 No one wants to help because we all want you to be PG too

lulu1180

Awwwwwwwwwwww thanks @adirat!!!!  You almost made me cry!!!!  I want all of you to be PG too!!!!!!

happyhiccup

@jess0211 i'm in the same boat, i'm "working from home" today but just really don't feel like doing anything. I feel like I've lost my "mojo" in terms of my job, I've been thinking it's time for me to make a change to a new job but I haven't found the right opportunity yet. 

@Bababatty nothing from their parents either? that's slightly rude, even just an acknowledgement would be nice. if we're not able to send a thank you card, we always at least text family or friends when we receive a gift or card of any sort, just to acknowledge it.


I try not to judge other moms for their choices, to each their own and all that, but I've been judging my sister in law lately. Her baby is younger than 6 months and she's been having issues with her milk supply for BF, but refuses to supplement with formula. So when my MIL or someone else is babysitting the baby the baby just cries in hunger because there's not enough milk and the baby can't have anything else. And he's tiny. Feed the baby! I don't really care about the BF v. formula can of worms debate, my view is if the baby is hungry, and needs food, nutrients, hydration, etc., that's the most important thing, and how you provide your baby with that doesn't matter to me. I get wanting to exclusively BF, and respect that, but I feel like she is being unnecessarily stubborn about it. Formula isn't poison, it's better that the baby get some kind of nutrients through formula than nothing at all. And her husband, my BIL, was formula fed as a baby. I just don't understand the whole situation. Ugh. 

Dilynne

I told my sister this morning tha I was feeling a little nauseous and that I thought I had the flu and she sent me the text below.  My confession is that I thought about stringing her along a bit so she'd learn not to automatically assume things

aggo

My mood has drastically switched to extreme grumpy and I going to blame PMS which is only making me grumpier. But anyway, another FFFC:

I will be super annoyed at close friends who give me crap for bday presents tomorrow. Like don't give me some cheap garbage you thought I'd like. I've made it clear multiple times I only like useful gifts because I'm picky with decorations and stuff and when you give me things like that I won't like it because you don't know my style and then I have to keep it for a long time until you forget and I can throw it away, and I have a tiny apartment! To be clear, I don't expect expensive things. Like I'd be much happier with a roll of aluminum foil than an ugly painting you now expect me to hang in my home or a throw pillow with Blair Waldorfs face on it. 

Dont give me junk. Idc if it's the thought that counts, I'd rather you give me nothing. 

Everycol0r

ag90 said:

My mood has drastically switched to extreme grumpy and I going to blame PMS which is only making me grumpier. But anyway, another FFFC:

I will be super annoyed at close friends who give me crap for bday presents tomorrow. Like don't give me some cheap garbage you thought I'd like. I've made it clear multiple times I only like useful gifts because I'm picky with decorations and stuff and when you give me things like that I won't like it because you don't know my style and then I have to keep it for a long time until you forget and I can throw it away, and I have a tiny apartment! To be clear, I don't expect expensive things. Like I'd be much happier with a roll of aluminum foil than an ugly painting you now expect me to hang in my home or a throw pillow with Blair Waldorfs face on it. 

Dont give me junk. Idc if it's the thought that counts, I'd rather you give me nothing. 

Why don't you just FB message them and ask them if you should be expecting a card in the mail? 

eggplantface

I live in a fairly liberal bubble, in that everyone I know on FB has the same political views as I do (although most are much more to the left than I am), which is nice and drama-free, but sometimes I wish I knew someone who posts those ridiculous and false memes so I can tear them a new one with logic and actual facts.

aggo

@Everycol0r HA

ETA: just to be clear I always act super grateful with whatever I receive just on the inside I'm like but really what do you expect me to do with this Blair Waldorf pillow? I'm a grown woman with what I like to think is a good sense of interior decorating style, you can't expect me to display this on my couch?

canonmom413

I just watched The Choice knowing I was going to cry. Now I'm crying an ugly cry and wish I didn't watch it  

MJDsquared

@NYTino24 Okay, if someone asked if they should check the mail for a card I would be fuming. How passive aggressive.

@Bababatty A gift should at least be acknowledged!

My sister's wedding reception is next weekend. She's 35 and it took her husband (they eloped) five years to propose, so when people asked if they were going to have kids she said, "Well it would take five more years to convince him of that, so I don't think so!" But I'm 99% sure she wants kids...and if they get pregnant immediately after she made a comment like that I'll be so frustrated. I don't hope she has trouble getting pregnant if she does want kids because I know how badly that sucks, but that comment irked me (unless she genuinely doesn't want kids).

Also, a few months ago when discussing what to wear to aforementioned wedding reception, I said, "Maybe I'll be pregnant!" Ha. Haha. Ha. UGH.

mschanandlerbong1214

Not really a confession more of a gripe. Went to the gyn to get my mirena removed so we could start actually ttc asap and all I got was a pap and an appt for the end of march to actually get it removed. I'm annoyed. 

mschanandlerbong1214

eggplantface said:

I live in a fairly liberal bubble, in that everyone I know on FB has the same political views as I do (although most are much more to the left than I am), which is nice and drama-free, but sometimes I wish I knew someone who posts those ridiculous and false memes so I can tear them a new one with logic and actual facts.

You can take some of my irritatingly intolerant "friends" that post Tomi Lahren crap all day. 

[Deleted User]

ag90 said:

@Everycol0r HA

ETA: just to be clear I always act super grateful with whatever I receive just on the inside I'm like but really what do you expect me to do with this Blair Waldorf pillow? I'm a grown woman with what I like to think is a good sense of interior decorating style, you can't expect me to display this on my couch?

Damn.  I don't think I've gotten a birthday gift from anyone other than my parents and H since like college.  That's so cool that your friends are so giving.

jenotontx

@ag90 Yessss. I totally feel your pain. My step-mom and Dad bought me the ugliest picture frame as a bridal shower gift that I will never ever use! Luickily I live on the other side of the country from them so they likely will never know but on the off chance they come to visit I may have to pull the thing out.   They also ALWAYS do this to me even though they know I am extremely picky. I actually straight out requested that they NOT buy me anything that wasn't on my registry and they still did. I even used the excuse that we have a really small apartment and didn't have room for extra stuff that wasn't a necessity but that apparently went through one ear and out the other. 

mschanandlerbong1214

Here is an actual confession. 

*TW*

ive never actually tried to get pregnant. We oopsed our way into both pregnancies. So if I'm ever insensitive it's not on purpose. This is all just new to me. Please don't hesitate to call me out if/when I'm insensitive. This is a learning experience for me. 

MJDsquared

@ag90 @JJMNO1616 DH's uncle made us a super gorgeous wooden welcome sign that is engraved with our last name, and a tree...and then he put the wrong date on it. He actually made it once with the wrong date so he had to start over...and got it wrong again. Obviously we aren't going to hang it up...but like, is it wrong if we burn it or something? We can't donate it, since it's personalized... I have an "aunt" (technically she's my dad's cousin) who is obsessed with Personalization Mall. Some of the personalized stuff she got us is cool, but she got us the ugliest canvas ever. The bright side is it came with a holder to prop it up and I've repurposed it to hold pictures I actually like... Ha!

Bababatty

@happyhiccup No, not a thing from anyone. They live across the country, so it would be nice to at least hear the present arrived. I guess I'll just ask, which seems passive aggressive, but whatever.  Re: the job, I completely understand you. I'm in the same position but it's been hard to motivate myself to do anything about it. Good luck with your job search!

jess0211

@ag90 I have myself convinced I will get KTFU on my birthday...because it totally works like that. Major eye roll at myself. Eta: the words 

jess0211

@eggplantface I have a bunch of those people on my fb. I literally gave up on trying to educate. It was exhausting.

dragonfly87-2

NYTino24 I second you on not understand the FB and kids' birthday's thing.

My FFFC: 

I silently judge couples who do the following things on Facebook because I genuinely do not understand the point:

• Comment on each other's walls or posts constantly (why not just talk to each other directly, especially if you live together)
• Who leave overly sappy or romantic posts on each others walls often (seems like they are trying to hard to publicly show their relationship is great)
• Who constantly post "Best Husband Ever--he made me breakfast" or "Best Wife Ever--She did my laundry" (ok--trophy generation, yes you should appreciate your SO...but no need to call them the best ever over doing nice, but everyday things)
• Couples who share facebook accounts jointly--you may be together, but you are still two individuals, that's f***ing weird 

To any and all of these, my standard response: 


Flame me now ladies!!

aggo

@antoto I stayed around where I went to college since it's in a major city and so did most of my college friends. We see each other all the time and always do presents for birthdays, I just feel shafted sometimes when I've taken notes on something someone mentioned they wanted or stalked their Pinterest wish list board, and then I get something random in return that I did not want. Love gossip girl! Don't need a GG throw pillow!

@JJMNO1616 it's so frustrating! Registeries are there for a reason. I got an ugly wall decoration for my wedding even though I asked for no decor because I know what I want. It's under my couch. Luckily the couple who got it for us hasn't asked why we haven't put it up. 

@MJDsquared  That sounds really beautiful but it's so sad the date is wrong! 

@jess0211  It is a birthday wish of mine that at least one of us will be KU on our birthday. Since I'm 99.9999% I'm out, here's to you!

LoveInDC

@jess0211 I hear that. It was just DH's birthday and I had this insane idea that I would GKTFU on his birthday. But apparently you have to ovulate for that to happen and my body decided against that, so... haha I crack myself up sometimes

eggplantface

dragonfly87 said:

NYTino24 I second you on not understand the FB and kids' birthday's thing.

My FFFC: 

I silently judge couples who do the following things on Facebook because I genuinely do not understand the point:

• Comment on each other's walls or posts constantly (why not just talk to each other directly, especially if you live together)
• Who leave overly sappy or romantic posts on each others walls often (seems like they are trying to hard to publicly show their relationship is great)
• Who constantly post "Best Husband Ever--he made me breakfast" or "Best Wife Ever--She did my laundry" (ok--trophy generation, yes you should appreciate your SO...but no need to call them the best ever over doing nice, but everyday things)
• Couples who share facebook accounts jointly--you may be together, but you are still two individuals, that's f***ing weird
  

I know a handful of people like this. It's all for attention and drives me up the wall. And whenever I see "Best husband ever!" I always want to respond with "No, mine is. YOUR husband hasn't done jack shit for me."
I do at least have a few friends who give zero fucks and will comment on the mushy posts with "Isn't your husband sitting right next to you? Just tell him."