We closed on a house yesterday and our inlaws helped with down payment and loan so we could get the best interest rate, well now my mother in law calls it her house and that she will be checking the condition of her house every time she visits! Umm no... we are making the mortgage payments, so if it is your house, maybe you should make the mortgage payment!!!!!!! ugh
Me:
27 DH: 29
Diagnosed
with PCOS: January 2009
1st D&C: Janaury 2009
Dating: March 18, 2009
Married: June 12, 2010
TTC: January 1, 2011
2nd D&C: June 5, 2011
3rd D&C: August 3, 2011
Dec 2016: BFP (due 8/5/2017)
@bwing10 That's awful! Do your in laws live close to you? If you don't have a good relationship with her I would have your DH talk to her and set her straight ASAP!!! That's invasive and rude, no way can she think that's okay.
@bwing10 That really sucks. Tell her she can come by and clean her house too.
My TW is my doctors office. They just called me and asked for my dating US results because they were done by my REs office and didn't know how to get in touch with them. This is the office who referred me to my RE. Then they told me that the blood work I had done last week in their office was wrong- they did it too early and I will have to repeat the blood work in a few weeks after my NT US. I just can't understand how they can be so disorganized.
My twatwaffle is the stomach flu. We visited my bff and her family on Sun, and they let us know (after we'd been there a while) that they'd all been puking their guts out earlier in the week. Yay.
DS woke up screaming this morning, and he had thrown up *everywhere*. And continued to do so until I left for work. I'm washing my hands like crazy and praying that DH and I don't get it.
We closed on a house yesterday and our inlaws helped with down payment and loan so we could get the best interest rate, well now my mother in law calls it her house and that she will be checking the condition of her house every time she visits! Umm no... we are making the mortgage payments, so if it is your house, maybe you should make the mortgage payment!!!!!!! ugh
Oh good grief. Are you paying them back?
When I was 27 I bought my first condo. I was prepared to put 10% down and pay PMI, but when I was close to putting in an offer, my parents offered me down payment money so I put down 25% total. However my dad and I drew up legal agreements. I paid him a higher interest rate than I paid the bank! We had a contract about condition of the property because in all legality, he was a lein holder at that point. We filed it as a junior mortgage a couple months after closing with the county records office so I could claim tax deductions on the interest paid to him.
It may be too late for you guys to come up with a similar arrangement, but having that legal agreement and me paying interest established that it was very clear it was MY property and Bank of Dad was a lender. No way was it "his" house unless I defaulted on the loan.
I've observed in other cases that family gifts come with strings, but a loan is a loan. Maybe you can find a way to appease her so she doesn't consider herself a part owner, but a lender.
@DeansGirl14 I did something similar. I asked my father-in-law for a loan for the down payment and purposely kept my husband out of the whole agreement to ensure that it was a business agreement between the two of us. I paid him the same interest as the return on his investments until a few Christmas back when he zeroed my interest as a gift.
This is going to be long, apoligizes in advanced!!! My TW is currently my inlaws. Our house flooded in August, and we have been living with them ever since while we rebuilt. We just got back home Sunday (wahoooo!!!). My MIL is just annoying as hell and sometimes just plum stupid. While living there, she knew I was pregnant, and would constantly as DH why I was sleeping so much and if I was throwing up bc I had a stomach bug (everyday?!?!). Moving day, I just wanted people to get stuff in my house. I will unpack and organize my closet, kitchen cabients, dresser, etc as time goes on. Every single thing she put her hands on she would ask me "now where exactly do you want this?" "come show me how you want me to hang up your clothes." Lady, I'm busy doing 100 other things. Just hang the shit up and I'll reorganize later!!!!!! Then last night she sends us a text asking if we miss them. NO, no I surely do not. Quite the opposite actually. If I don't have to see them or hear their voices for 3 months that'll be too damn soon. I didn't respond but DH straight up said no Andd this weekend we have my SIL's wedding so I have to spend the.entire.freaking.weekend with them, on what should be my first weekend to not see them at all!!!!
@ColoradoHiker gahhh the stomach bug is the worst thing in the world to me. I would seriously take a week long flu over a 24 hour stomach bug! I hope DS gets to feeling better ASAP and you and DH can steer clear of it!
Mine is also my MIL. I love my FIL but man, MIL though.....something.
She keeps telling my hubby I need to eat protein and continue eating eggs for breakfast (which I did for my 1st pregnancy w/my son and even up to recently bec I love eggs). BUT now that food and protein makes me sick, I don't eat but sporadically and when I do get a chance. Meat/eggs make me sick now...but she's forever telling me to eat. My mother doesn't even tell me to eat because she had the same feeling of food aversions when she was pregnant with me.
Oh and MIL wants us to visit them this spring (SoCal/San Diego) but I'm like, I'm tired and don't want to travel. Plus my son is now 2 years old and we have to pay a seat for him now. Can I just stay home?
@dma0389 aren't MILs the worst sometimes?! Mine kept trying to force me to eat when we were living there. Random food items she'd ask if I liked and if I said yes she'd ask why I wasn't eating them. Just the other day she asked if I drank milk. I said occassionally. She said "well I'd think you'd need to be drinking a certain number of glasses of it a day while pregnant." I mean do they think we are going to do something to intentionally hurt our babies?! No, we aren't, so let us be the grown adults that we are and leave us be!!
I was looking for the SO is an A-Hole thread, then realized he's a TW since it's Tuesday!
DH is my TW today. DD.C (nearly 2 y/o) is sick. She normally goes to work with me on Mondays and Thursdays and MIL or my mom watch her on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. Yesterday I called off because she was sick and we didn't have alternative care. Today DH said, "I'll stay home with the girls" since MIL doesn't like watching them when they're sick. (I don't blame her at all--sick kids are the worst! Plus, she has asthma, so getting sick is really hard for her breathing wise.) I called DH at the end of my workday and told him, "I'm going for lunch, do you need anything?". He said no. About 30 minutes to 45 minutes later he calls and asks where I am since he has to go to work. I say, "Oh sorry, did you get called in?". He replies that no, he was only planning to take the morning off and he told me that. No, you didn't DH, you TW.
@NatSprat0703 Me, too. I'd rather be stuffy and sneezing than throwing up. A few years ago I ended up in the ER because I threw up for almost 24h straight, and while I'm not terrified of it or anything, I definitely avoid it all costs now.
Fun fact: At my very first 'real' job, I was working in a college of medicine/ research center/ hospital. I was there less than a month, caught a stomach bug, and almost threw up on my new boss' shoes. I did throw up in the trash can next to his shoes. He was so gracious about it, but I was mortified. He ended up being the best boss I've ever had!
@dma0389 Ugh! I feel like being annoying about food is something that a lot of moms (especially baby boomers) do. With that I'd just let it roll off your back, unless hearing about eggs gets you queasy. The travel is frustrating, though. I can't relate since both sides are driving distance for me, but can they travel to you? Or help cover the cost?
My TW today is one of my paraprofessionals. I thought (think?) she was (is) my friend, but due to school political drama and other stuff (I think) she has been a bitch for the last 6-7 weeks. I do not know if it is directed at me or not, because she has basically stopped speaking to me. I am so fucking done with it. We were coaching volleyball together, she and her niece came over to my house after school all the time, we hung out together and it seems all of a sudden she doesn't like me or the way I do things. Be a fucking adult, and if you have a problem with ME tell me. If you have a problem with our BS administration and the way shit is done here, at least be nice to me! I am not the one causing the fucking problems!
Sorry for all the swearing, but the whole situation is making my job miserable.
@PeachyTeachy LOL yeah I just let it roll and I'm like whatever at times, but she keeps insisting EGGS and everytime she does it makes me sick. hahaha.
I'm going to suggest to my hubby that if they really want us across the coast to help us pay. They were just here for Xmas/New Years so I doubt they'll come till baby is due.
@peachyteachy I had almost the same day! My DH lost his job last Wednesday. He's been looking for work. Today my DS was supposed to go to the sitter. I want to take him even though DH is off because he only goes 2x a week and I want him to stay in a routine as much as possible. I told DH to use the time to look for a job (like he's been doing. For the last week)
well 5 minutes after I drop off DS the sitter calls because he has projectile vomited everywhere! I call DH to go get him and he doesn't want to!!! He says the sitter should just "deal with it" I was soooooo pissed.
@Kudlica27 Today must be the day for vomitting kids. My 7yr old came to my classroom at lunch because he did not feel well. Decided he did not want to get a ride home and instead wanted to stay in school for the rest of the day. Not 5 minutes after all the teachers (thus no ride) were back in class he was vomitting in the trash can outside my classroom. We bundled up and I walked him home to DH.
First of all I want to say that i have never noticed this topic before and plan on incorporating the war twatwaffle into every day conversations.
That being said, I don't really have a TW, but I will call out my coworker who came into work today with pneumonia. If i get sick, i will not be a happy camper
Huh, my husband is sick too. Definitely that time of year. "Man flu" seriously. I'm like, get sleep, drink tea, take a day off work. He never calls off sick. But I swear, if I feel something coming on, I call off work, sleep all day, drink a ton of tea, and I'm magically cured. But no, he goes about his daily business, including going to the gym (because he's "fat"- not really), and then remains sick and bitching for weeks. Just take care of yourself! Oh, and after the gym, he complains about muscle soreness and never foam rolls, even though we own a foam roller and those work wonders. More curing, less bitching, gawd!
And now my 19 month old is sick. Ear infection, fluid in the other ear, and respiratory infection with high fever. If I get sick, I'm going to lose it on someone
My MIL for texting me, DH, and SIL at 5:10am asking how to "paste" something on Facebook instead of sharing. WTF! I'm such a light sleeper but I keep my phone near me in case of emergencies. Not Facebook questions.
Yup! My son has been vomiting all week too! And up the entire night! He is 13 months old and cried and wouldn't go in his crib for 5 hours straight last night because he wanted to watch a video on my phone! (Something I have unfortunately been allowing him to do pretty often recently because I have zero strength to play with him/take care of him- HG mama here...)
My twatwaffle is the stomach flu. We visited my bff and her family on Sun, and they let us know (after we'd been there a while) that they'd all been puking their guts out earlier in the week. Yay.
I would be LIVID about this. Stomach flu is nothing to be all breezy about.
Friends of mine pulled this same thing on us with strep. We'd be there for a few hours and they apologized for their daughter because she "was getting over having strep this week". I was so pissed.
Together: January 2002 Married: May 2008 Baby: August 2017
Clearly we like to rush along at lightning speed...
@Mango517 yeah DS started puking yesterday morning. It didn't last long, but today was the other end. And nothing says fun like a 14m old so exhausted that he threw up in bed on one end, switched to the other end, threw up again and fell back asleep without even crying.
DH and I are still okay, hoping it stays that way.
Today's complaints, in the span of 45 minutes: - being forced to allow customers to purchase memberships online, even though they can still purchase by mail or email or phone or in person, and in fact the website encourages them to use those methods if they fall into any of five categories. Maybe we don't have young members because they haven't been able to buy things online. - that she doesn't have access to update our website, or to change closed out records in Quickbooks (which even I can't do, for good reason) - that a Christmas bonus hasn't occurred yet - that they might be debating bonuses for people "who haven't even been here for a year" (including ME, her boss) - that we're spending money on useless things like interns (never mind that the internship program is to give high school and college kids in our rural town an opportunity to have a white collar work experience, not because we expect them to actually accomplish anything of consequence) and bulletin boards (first useless item: shades for her office) and accountants - that our website has been giving her error messages for a week (why on earth would you not share that?!?!). I had to hear from a board member that it's not that expensive to have our web designer fix things - no kidding, I asked for help as soon as I heard about the problem!
@britvahok@Kudlica27 Yes she does know I'm pregnant!! WTH! and she wasn't sent home because it was just her and I working together. So far I feel okay. *fingers crossed*
DS2 8/2017
Re: Twatwaffle Tuesday
Diagnosed with PCOS: January 2009
1st D&C: Janaury 2009
Dating: March 18, 2009
Married: June 12, 2010
TTC: January 1, 2011
2nd D&C: June 5, 2011
3rd D&C: August 3, 2011
Dec 2016: BFP (due 8/5/2017)
My TW is my doctors office. They just called me and asked for my dating US results because they were done by my REs office and didn't know how to get in touch with them. This is the office who referred me to my RE. Then they told me that the blood work I had done last week in their office was wrong- they did it too early and I will have to repeat the blood work in a few weeks after my NT US. I just can't understand how they can be so disorganized.
DS woke up screaming this morning, and he had thrown up *everywhere*. And continued to do so until I left for work. I'm washing my hands like crazy and praying that DH and I don't get it.
DS2: EDD- 09.08.17
When I was 27 I bought my first condo. I was prepared to put 10% down and pay PMI, but when I was close to putting in an offer, my parents offered me down payment money so I put down 25% total.
However my dad and I drew up legal agreements. I paid him a higher interest rate than I paid the bank! We had a contract about condition of the property because in all legality, he was a lein holder at that point. We filed it as a junior mortgage a couple months after closing with the county records office so I could claim tax deductions on the interest paid to him.
It may be too late for you guys to come up with a similar arrangement, but having that legal agreement and me paying interest established that it was very clear it was MY property and Bank of Dad was a lender. No way was it "his" house unless I defaulted on the loan.
I've observed in other cases that family gifts come with strings, but a loan is a loan. Maybe you can find a way to appease her so she doesn't consider herself a part owner, but a lender.
Unsolicited advice for the day ;-)
My TW is currently my inlaws. Our house flooded in August, and we have been living with them ever since while we rebuilt. We just got back home Sunday (wahoooo!!!). My MIL is just annoying as hell and sometimes just plum stupid. While living there, she knew I was pregnant, and would constantly as DH why I was sleeping so much and if I was throwing up bc I had a stomach bug (everyday?!?!).
Moving day, I just wanted people to get stuff in my house. I will unpack and organize my closet, kitchen cabients, dresser, etc as time goes on. Every single thing she put her hands on she would ask me "now where exactly do you want this?" "come show me how you want me to hang up your clothes." Lady, I'm busy doing 100 other things. Just hang the shit up and I'll reorganize later!!!!!!
Then last night she sends us a text asking if we miss them. NO, no I surely do not. Quite the opposite actually. If I don't have to see them or hear their voices for 3 months that'll be too damn soon. I didn't respond but DH straight up said no
She keeps telling my hubby I need to eat protein and continue eating eggs for breakfast (which I did for my 1st pregnancy w/my son and even up to recently bec I love eggs). BUT now that food and protein makes me sick, I don't eat but sporadically and when I do get a chance. Meat/eggs make me sick now...but she's forever telling me to eat. My mother doesn't even tell me to eat because she had the same feeling of food aversions when she was pregnant with me.
Oh and MIL wants us to visit them this spring (SoCal/San Diego) but I'm like, I'm tired and don't want to travel. Plus my son is now 2 years old and we have to pay a seat for him now. Can I just stay home?
DH is my TW today. DD.C (nearly 2 y/o) is sick. She normally goes to work with me on Mondays and Thursdays and MIL or my mom watch her on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. Yesterday I called off because she was sick and we didn't have alternative care. Today DH said, "I'll stay home with the girls" since MIL doesn't like watching them when they're sick. (I don't blame her at all--sick kids are the worst! Plus, she has asthma, so getting sick is really hard for her breathing wise.) I called DH at the end of my workday and told him, "I'm going for lunch, do you need anything?". He said no. About 30 minutes to 45 minutes later he calls and asks where I am since he has to go to work. I say, "Oh sorry, did you get called in?". He replies that no, he was only planning to take the morning off and he told me that. No, you didn't DH, you TW.
Fun fact: At my very first 'real' job, I was working in a college of medicine/ research center/ hospital. I was there less than a month, caught a stomach bug, and almost threw up on my new boss' shoes. I did throw up in the trash can next to his shoes. He was so gracious about it, but I was mortified. He ended up being the best boss I've ever had!
DS2: EDD- 09.08.17
My TW is my husband. He has the man flu. He did go to the doctor, but he's just irritating me.
Sorry for all the swearing, but the whole situation is making my job miserable.
I'm going to suggest to my hubby that if they really want us across the coast to help us pay. They were just here for Xmas/New Years so I doubt they'll come till baby is due.
My DH lost his job last Wednesday. He's been looking for work. Today my DS was supposed to go to the sitter. I want to take him even though DH is off because he only goes 2x a week and I want him to stay in a routine as much as possible. I told DH to use the time to look for a job (like he's been doing. For the last week)
well 5 minutes after I drop off DS the sitter calls because he has projectile vomited everywhere! I call DH to go get him and he doesn't want to!!! He says the sitter should just "deal with it" I was soooooo pissed.
Today must be the day for vomitting kids. My 7yr old came to my classroom at lunch because he did not feel well. Decided he did not want to get a ride home and instead wanted to stay in school for the rest of the day. Not 5 minutes after all the teachers (thus no ride) were back in class he was vomitting in the trash can outside my classroom. We bundled up and I walked him home to DH.
That being said, I don't really have a TW, but I will call out my coworker who came into work today with pneumonia. If i get sick, i will not be a happy camper
Me: A-Okay!
DH: 0-1% morphology
Married: 5/2008
TTC: 5/2009
**TW--BFP**
2013: IUI x1 Failed
10/2016: First IVF Cycle! YAY!
10/31 - Fresh Transfer.
11/10- BFN. Starting cycle for FETx2
12/16 - U/S - Twins!
#1 - DD: 7/5/12
#2 - DS: 5/21/14
#3 - EDD: 8/25/17
Friends of mine pulled this same thing on us with strep. We'd be there for a few hours and they apologized for their daughter because she "was getting over having strep this week". I was so pissed.
Together: January 2002
Married: May 2008
Baby: August 2017
Clearly we like to rush along at lightning speed...
DH and I are still okay, hoping it stays that way.
DS2: EDD- 09.08.17
Today's complaints, in the span of 45 minutes:
- being forced to allow customers to purchase memberships online, even though they can still purchase by mail or email or phone or in person, and in fact the website encourages them to use those methods if they fall into any of five categories. Maybe we don't have young members because they haven't been able to buy things online.
- that she doesn't have access to update our website, or to change closed out records in Quickbooks (which even I can't do, for good reason)
- that a Christmas bonus hasn't occurred yet
- that they might be debating bonuses for people "who haven't even been here for a year" (including ME, her boss)
- that we're spending money on useless things like interns (never mind that the internship program is to give high school and college kids in our rural town an opportunity to have a white collar work experience, not because we expect them to actually accomplish anything of consequence) and bulletin boards (first useless item: shades for her office) and accountants
- that our website has been giving her error messages for a week (why on earth would you not share that?!?!). I had to hear from a board member that it's not that expensive to have our web designer fix things - no kidding, I asked for help as soon as I heard about the problem!
I'm sooooooo peeved.
Me: A-Okay!
DH: 0-1% morphology
Married: 5/2008
TTC: 5/2009
**TW--BFP**
2013: IUI x1 Failed
10/2016: First IVF Cycle! YAY!
10/31 - Fresh Transfer.
11/10- BFN. Starting cycle for FETx2
12/16 - U/S - Twins!