If anyone saw my rant from last week, about my company changing our maternity policy from 8 weeks short term disability (66% salary) + option to take 5 more weeks unpaid under FMLA to 12 weeks fully paid leave, I have bad news. All of us who are pregnant now fought for it to go into effect immediately or at least to grandfather in the women in the company who are currently pregnant and planning leave. But the effective date is for babies born on or after June 1 2017. They decided against including us, and we are shut out of the new policy. So my colleague who is due a few months after me gets her time fully paid, even though it's possible that both of us will be on leave the same month (June), she will be receiving 100% pay and I will be receiving no pay, or using all my vacation for the remainder of the year to receive any pay my last month of leave.
Understand they need to enforce a cut off date but it just seems like if you're currently pregnant, you should be included. If you've already had your baby and on your leave, maybe you're out of luck - certainly you'd be out of luck if you are back to work following your leave - but if your leave hasn't started?? Or overlaps with the date in policy change??
My students are plucking my nerves. Had one this morning refuse to take his hood off. His hair was cut to short. I'm like you are a senior by now you should know how to tell the person who cuts your hair how it should look. He couldn't stay and chose to leave class.
One of DHs friends, who I don't see very often, asked me yesterday " what did you weigh before you were pregnant? How much weight have you gained?" Even DH looked at him and said "seriously?!". To top it off, he asked me this question IN FRONT of a group of friends we were with. What the hell dude?!?
I know this is about symptoms, but I'm SO BOTHERED by it that it totally qualifies for this board IMO.. my arms are going COMPLETELY DEAD NUMB EVERY SINGLE TIME I lay down. If I am not sitting up straight they tingle, go numb and then full blown out PAIN ensues. I cannot find a pillow or position to help this except to sleep straight up in a rocking chair which is practically impossible for me. I haven't slept in days and I'm so pissed off by it and just want some freaking sleep! Not even that long, just give me an hour or two!
@jenny0228 sorry to hear about that. That REALLY sucks.
@c25 I've experienced something similar when not pregnant when my carpal tunnel was really bad. But if it's bad enough that you're not sleeping, your dr should be Intervening in some way. What has the dr said?
I'm pissed off about that "why I dont support the women's march" post going around on Facebook. And now reading about @jenny0228 and your horrible company policy fills me with even more feminist rage!!!! My hormones are going nutty and all I want is twenty six tacos and a godblessed footrub! *dinosaur shriek*
I'm getting no sleep bc my son keeps laying on this spot in my back (which I think is probably broken from a car accident I was in incidentally when we found out we were pregnant) and its causing me enough pain it makes me nauseous. It also makes my legs and specifically toes go numb.
The exhaustion is overwhelming at times...plus I chase around a 17 mo old everyday after work.
One of DH's friends came over yesterday for like 3 minutes, and in those 3 minutes he wanted to see me. he said "Wow you're huge!" My FIL, DH, and I all looked at him and said, "nope not that huge, and you don't call people huge!" He quickly left after that. Now I know why this guy still lives with his parents and is unattached. *facepalm*
@rw3190 holy cow...that sounds miserable! Is there some way to help that pain? Have you seen a doctor about a potentially broken back?
@npaulie right?! Or nachos even. Im exercising my feminine wiles on DH trying to bargain for tacos. Which is super easy because he loves to feed me haha
@mecoats that made me laugh out loud! Your hubby and FIL are wise men!
I'm feeling like I have to explain how to do everything to my husband and its getting really freaking irritating. He's not by any means dumb, he just doesn't think sometimes. Or maybe it's just that we don't think the same way. Either way, aggravating!
My students are plucking my nerves. Had one this morning refuse to take his hood off. His hair was cut to short. I'm like you are a senior by now you should know how to tell the person who cuts your hair how it should look. He couldn't stay and chose to leave class.
This is why I'm happy my school district allows hats. No battle for me to have to enforce.
I'm feeling like I have to explain how to do everything to my husband and its getting really freaking irritating. He's not by any means dumb, he just doesn't think sometimes. Or maybe it's just that we don't think the same way. Either way, aggravating!
I swear guys do this on purpose sometimes. I think they act dumb so we get frustrated so we can just do whatever it is that we need them to do ourselves.
The girl I've been training for the last 6 weeks to replace me during my leave came to me today and said she's worried about having enough time to learn how to do my job. I basically taught myself how to do the job with no training because they had some problems with staff right before me and there was nobody to train me. And she's had 6 weeks and she gets, hopefully, 5 or 6 more. I am the only full time employee, there is one other paralegal who is part time and the company is bending over backward to allow me to have 3 months off and they hired this girl specifically to cover my leave. There is literally nobody else to do my job, except the part time person who has three kids and just can't work more than 20 hours, let alone cover my 40. I already feel guilty about taking the time and all that they've done to make sure I can and now I'm freaked out she's going to quit and we will all be screwed.
@kap1988 she will be FINE! And if she isn't, then they need to hire a more qualified temp. Do NOT let her inability to pickup on things keep you from spending time with your baby that you will never get back. Hang in there, I know how frustrating this can be.
Additionally - I would take crazy amounts of "maternity notes" incase they do need to hire someone else in her absence and yours.
I'm feeling like I have to explain how to do everything to my husband and its getting really freaking irritating. He's not by any means dumb, he just doesn't think sometimes. Or maybe it's just that we don't think the same way. Either way, aggravating!
I swear guys do this on purpose sometimes. I think they act dumb so we get frustrated so we can just do whatever it is that we need them to do ourselves.
My husband will tell me "but you're so good at it!" sometimes to try to get out of doing things. It's folding laundry...It's not like you can medal in it. You just freaking do it.
@kap1988 she will be FINE! And if she isn't, then they need to hire a more qualified temp. Do NOT let her inability to pickup on things keep you from spending time with your baby that you will never get back. Hang in there, I know how frustrating this can be.
Additionally - I would take crazy amounts of "maternity notes" incase they do need to hire someone else in her absence and yours.
I really just need to do my best to train her and then come March 2nd it's not my problem anymore. I love my job and the company I work for but you're right, I will never get those three months with my baby back. Thank you for the perspective.
i went to the chiro last week and and it didn't go away but I'm thinking of trying another one (new to this area so trying out new doctors)!
Ive had carpal tunnel and DeQuarvains syndrome with my other babies so this numbing is fairly normal to me..but the pain and no sleep consistently is just getting too much. I'll be asking the OB for sure about it next week but I have a feeling he will say I can wait it out or go visit a specialist which all they will do is offer surgery post partum or the braces. Which i do have the braces so I should try them again! Last time I tried them I knocked myself in the face so I never wore them again hahaha
@C25 my carpal tunnel was as bad as you describe before I started wearing the brace on my right hand. The pain from my elbow down was so intense it would keep me awake. I'm now wearing braces on both wrists and the right hand is numb 24/7 but no longer painful.
Talk to your doctor, but if you have the braces it certainly wouldn't hurt to wear then and see if it gives you enough relief to get some more sleep before your next appointment.
My OB said that wearing them 24/7 would bring the most relief, but I don't have the patience to wear them during the day.
I'm feeling like I have to explain how to do everything to my husband and its getting really freaking irritating. He's not by any means dumb, he just doesn't think sometimes. Or maybe it's just that we don't think the same way. Either way, aggravating!
I swear guys do this on purpose sometimes. I think they act dumb so we get frustrated so we can just do whatever it is that we need them to do ourselves.
There's an episode of Everybody Loves Raymond where he does exactly this, my husband was watching it and I swear he does it on purpose occasionally
To recap: my boss's last day was a week ago (He was a senior manager). I've been doing his job and mine for the past week. In that time, my doctor also told me no more commuting to the office because of the pain I was experiencing in my pelvis.
Well, this week, my non-existent boss's boss (The VP) is out of the country on vacation... So I'm getting S&*^ from all directions. I'm getting requests for the department's VP. I'm also having other departments' VPs demand things of me.
They waited for my VP to go on vacation KNOWING that I was the only person who can make decisions in the department, and are now asking me to make decisions that I have NO BUSINESS being involved in, and they have NO BUSINESS asking me to make.
I'm nervous that I'm going to snap on someone and get my a$$ fired.
@direwolfmini i would stand up for yourself pregnant or not. you're not getting compensated for all of the extra work or stress and in no way signed anything stating that you were willing to take on this responsibility. if you don't have the resources or background history to make an informed decision that's in no way a reflection on you. i know it's easier said than done in many office settings but i'd put my foot down. you don't want to send a precedent for getting walked all over or worse get in trouble for doing something you never wanted to do in the first place. just my two cents. hang in there!
@direwolfmini I agree with PP, you need to stand up for yourself. They are taking serious advantage of you and putting you in a position that could hurt your career in the future. Personally I'd refuse to make any decisions above my position.
@jenny0228 holy crap. That's awful. So sorry your company can't figure out how to look beyond black and white options.
@C25 is it your arms or wrists? I've had both. I'll be getting double surgery for the DeQuarvains (which started before I had babies) after this pregnancy.
But the arms was a HUGE issue during my last pregnancy. Everyone said it was unfortunately normal fur to circulation later in pregnancy. If you can sleep comfortably elevated on your back at all I had to do that then have pillows on each of my sides and put my arms on top. Only way they wouldn't go numb then get painful. Also anything you can do to reduce swelling /inflammation. Things as simple as lemon water can help.
My bitch fest - How in the HELL does military insurance not cover the TDAP?!?!?! I'm unusually angry at this.
So I live in the DMV area where they give us an option to use traditional tricare or John Hopkins - US Family Health Plan. (Which i have) But it's still under tricare. I'm also a disabled vet. Maybe I can go to VA and avoid the $75. Ridiculous.
Not entirely a bitch fest but I was lurking in Feb 2017 and there are some really nasty ladies on that board. Poor person posted under the wrong thread and got absolutely ridiculed. It is nice to see we have a mature and fair March 2017 board. I seriously appreciate all you ladies
@C25 Not sure if you have tried this already or not but at my last prenatal massage I mentioned that I was having carpal tunnel pain and she did some extra work on my arms that made the numbness/pain go away for a couple months! It just started coming back this last week and I'm planning on making another appointment soon.
Re: Monday Bitch Fest 1/23
Understand they need to enforce a cut off date but it just seems like if you're currently pregnant, you should be included. If you've already had your baby and on your leave, maybe you're out of luck - certainly you'd be out of luck if you are back to work following your leave - but if your leave hasn't started?? Or overlaps with the date in policy change??
@c25 I've experienced something similar when not pregnant when my carpal tunnel was really bad. But if it's bad enough that you're not sleeping, your dr should be Intervening in some way. What has the dr said?
I'm getting no sleep bc my son keeps laying on this spot in my back (which I think is probably broken from a car accident I was in incidentally when we found out we were pregnant) and its causing me enough pain it makes me nauseous. It also makes my legs and specifically toes go numb.
The exhaustion is overwhelming at times...plus I chase around a 17 mo old everyday after work.
Short on patience
DH: 37
DD: 03/17/17
DS: 12/06/19
@npaulie right?! Or nachos even. Im exercising my feminine wiles on DH trying to bargain for tacos. Which is super easy because he loves to feed me haha
@mecoats that made me laugh out loud! Your hubby and FIL are wise men!
Me 28 DH 28 Married 2012
TTC #1 since March 2015
Metformin + Femara + Gonal F + Trigger = BFP 6/24/16
EDD 3/3/17
Found out it's a girl! 9/23/16
Me 28 DH 28 Married 2012
TTC #1 since March 2015
Metformin + Femara + Gonal F + Trigger = BFP 6/24/16
EDD 3/3/17
Found out it's a girl! 9/23/16
Additionally - I would take crazy amounts of "maternity notes" incase they do need to hire someone else in her absence and yours.
Me 28 DH 28 Married 2012
TTC #1 since March 2015
Metformin + Femara + Gonal F + Trigger = BFP 6/24/16
EDD 3/3/17
Found out it's a girl! 9/23/16
Me 28 DH 28 Married 2012
TTC #1 since March 2015
Metformin + Femara + Gonal F + Trigger = BFP 6/24/16
EDD 3/3/17
Found out it's a girl! 9/23/16
i went to the chiro last week and and it didn't go away but I'm thinking of trying another one (new to this area so trying out new doctors)!
Ive had carpal tunnel and DeQuarvains syndrome with my other babies so this numbing is fairly normal to me..but the pain and no sleep consistently is just getting too much. I'll be asking the OB for sure about it next week but I have a feeling he will say I can wait it out or go visit a specialist which all they will do is offer surgery post partum or the braces. Which i do have the braces so I should try them again! Last time I tried them I knocked myself in the face so I never wore them again hahaha
Talk to your doctor, but if you have the braces it certainly wouldn't hurt to wear then and see if it gives you enough relief to get some more sleep before your next appointment.
My OB said that wearing them 24/7 would bring the most relief, but I don't have the patience to wear them during the day.
Me: 39 DH: 40
Married: 12/6/2014
BFP#2: 10/28/15 MC: 11/24/15
BFP#3: 3/20/16 MC: 4/26/16
BFP#4: 7/15/16 DD: 3/18/17
BFP#5: 5/1/18 EDD: 1/12/19
To recap: my boss's last day was a week ago (He was a senior manager). I've been doing his job and mine for the past week. In that time, my doctor also told me no more commuting to the office because of the pain I was experiencing in my pelvis.
Well, this week, my non-existent boss's boss (The VP) is out of the country on vacation... So I'm getting S&*^ from all directions. I'm getting requests for the department's VP. I'm also having other departments' VPs demand things of me.
They waited for my VP to go on vacation KNOWING that I was the only person who can make decisions in the department, and are now asking me to make decisions that I have NO BUSINESS being involved in, and they have NO BUSINESS asking me to make.
I'm nervous that I'm going to snap on someone and get my a$$ fired.
Is it March yet?
@C25 is it your arms or wrists? I've had both. I'll be getting double surgery for the DeQuarvains (which started before I had babies) after this pregnancy.
But the arms was a HUGE issue during my last pregnancy. Everyone said it was unfortunately normal fur to circulation later in pregnancy. If you can sleep comfortably elevated on your back at all I had to do that then have pillows on each of my sides and put my arms on top. Only way they wouldn't go numb then get painful. Also anything you can do to reduce swelling /inflammation. Things as simple as lemon water can help.
My bitch fest - How in the HELL does military insurance not cover the TDAP?!?!?! I'm unusually angry at this.
Me: 26 Hubs: 28
Married: 6/6/15
Baby Girl: 3/22/2017