IVF Single Mom By Choice

prudence9-2

@LoveDontCostAThing glad you're feeling better! And I know exactly what you mean about going to work and not being able to think and google about every little thing all the time!

and yes, I so hope they find something that can be quickly fixed by a pill. FX!! 

But first, need my hcg levels to go down... beta tomorrow!

Hopeful_mom

Prudence9 @LoveDontCostAThing So since I'm doing the banking and have an odd number of embryos to test I believe they wait till my next round to have them texted altogether.  Its the same price for 8 and if I test any less and under I believe you get charged the same price...nice right!  I hate that everything is such a waiting game.

@LoveDontCostAThing try not to over do it.  Glad ur not going to the bathroom as much ur body is adjusting.  I think ur pretty much at 6wks and i have to tell you that was my turning point where i felt like poop everyday!  Just exhausted I could never get enough sleep and was nauseous every second of the day...and everything was doubled by 2  Its not to freak you out as its different for everyone BUT now is the time that usually things will start to hit you.  Hang in there.  You're right its all a crap shoot for sure!  I have to hope that the FET will work too!

I do need to get a list of questions together for my RE, have no clue about the differences of Medicated vs non medicated FET...didn't even know that was a thing.  A girl in another group got pregnant with twins doing a non medicated...i asked her but she never followed up...I mean so rude HAHA!!!  I googled away and got it but will still have to inquire about it.  I guess since we're doing another ER shes probably waiting.  I haven't asked her about turning it into a fresh cycle so I better discuss it soon!  I know OH wont want to go for it as its still a gamble either way!

prudence9-2

@LoveDontCostAThing hope you're feeling better today!

@Hopeful_mom ahhh that sucks that they don't test it immediately. All this waiting 

As for medicated vs non medicated.... non medicated just piggyback on your cycle. So there is no much preparations and no PIO injections!!!
On other hand, medicated one includes few weeks of preparations (in my case, Lupron injections and estrogen patches) and then the fun PIO injections. And once your get pregnant you continue until 12 weeks. 

So why even bother with medicated FET? The problem is, if you do non medicated and your lining is not thick enough, they don't do the transfer. And with my age and the fact that I never had super thick lining the dr thought this was the safer bet. If I was few years younger I would have def tried the non medicated one. But in my age I felt like I can't take the chance. And it did work. My body responded well to the patches and I had the best lining I've ever had! 

prudence9-2

AFM... just had the beta... what are the chances it's back to normal 2 weeks after the MUA? 3-3.5 weeks since last heartbeat??

LoveDontCostAThing

Thanks for checking in. I did go to work today.  I felt okay...my stomach isn't totally normal, but not too bad.  I feel like I almost had a panic attack yesterday because I am always so anxious, so that can't help with stomach issues.  Work was a good distraction today, and I was pretty busy, so I didn't have time to google or think too much.  I am the kind of person who needs to be busy if I am going through a stressful time.  I've always had anxiety. It is just so hard to not worry.  Tomorrow I go in for those blood tests, and I think another beta.  That's why I've been freaking lately.  It's like if I get good news then I'm good for a few days, and then I start getting anxious again a few days before the next appointment.

@Prudence9 -did you get your beta results?  did you say it's back to normal, or are you asking us if we think it'll be back to normal?

prudence9-2

@LoveDontCostAThing glad you're feeling okay!
And I know what you mean about worrying. If you get one good beta you worry about the next. Then you worry the embryo won't grow enough, heartbeat won't be strong enough. It's endless 

before I was just wondering if you think there is a chance beta is normal. Anyway, just got the results and it's 336. Ahhh. 

Hopeful_mom

@LoveDontCostAThing so glad to hear you're feeling better and had a good day.  Its true when you're too busy with other things it sometimes helps.  For me I just stress about work and me  You know the worrying will be never ending.  I would love to say just be happy and enjoy the pregnancy, I pray you get to the day that you can do that...but I know how difficult that will be.  Being a mom means you always worry...y do u think it would stop after day 1   I would hold my breath during each US until i heard both heartbeats...but now i was like that during just my monitoring so what should i say.   Good luck tomorrow praying all goes smoothly for you!  Will look forward to seeing your update!!

@Prudence9 -when i read your first note i was going to say probably not and i guess i was right  Its actually higher then I thought.  I first starts at 14k so i thought when i got down to 100 i would be down in a week, but the last 100 lingered for another 3 weeks...I actually got AF before my beta dropped.  Everyone is different but that was my experience.  It was when AF was almost over that my beta was finally negative.  Thanks for the info on the cycles...usually when they give me the results of my lining poo poo its always been in the range its suppose too.  Does that mean a non medicated could work?  My RE doesn't do the PIO shot I do the suppositories instead.  It does sound like the shot are miserable for many so i guess i should be glad.

prudence9-2

@Hopeful_mom that's great that your lining was always where it should be!! So maybe you'd be advised to do the non medicated cycle!!! 

That sucks that it takes so long for hcg to go down. Ahhh. While I'm waiting, I just scheduled today few days away with my best friend. We'll be going away in 2 weeks. 

Hopeful_mom

@Prudence9 - thats nice hope its some where relaxing!  I can't say my lining is perfect I know some have had issues in that arena and I'm very thankful I've been in the spectrum I need to be.  Its crazy how many things need to be on point fpr the magic to happen!

prudence9-2

@Hopeful_mom yeah, I was always on the little thinner end of things. Not super thin but maybe not the most optimal. Which is why when he dr said she would recommend medicated I decided to go for it. 

As for PIO, what do you use instead of the injections? When I did IUI back in 2013 when I was still living in NYC, the dr told me to use the inserts. And I totally hated them as they drips all day long and it gets really nasty. 

As for the injections, I was terrified at first. Especially since I had to do it myself. On the day of my retrieval (back in Nov, when I thought I will have a fresh transfer) I watched online videos of women self injecting. And then at night time I just went for it. And on the next night surprised myself I could do it with my left hand as well!!!

Keep in mind, that I am afraid of needles and before my IUIs in NYC I went to the clinic to get the trigger shot! But here in California they told me I will have to do the trigger myself as it has to be done at night time. So from here to there... I did IUI triggers on my own and then all the IVF injections. But the PIO is different as it's with a 1.5 inch needle!!! 

As for the shot shot itself it's really not as bad. Some days though were pretty painful. Also the spot hurts for about 2 days. So it's good I could change sides. 

A weird thing that happened to me though is that few days before I was told no heartbeat and that I need to stop, I started having numbness on my outter upper thighs. It's better now but not completely gone. I'm pretty sure it is because of the shots. I ended up doing them for almost 9 weeks! And now it is 4 weeks since I stopped and I still have some numbness. 

@LoveDontCostAThing hope you're feeling better and that blood tests results are all good!

prudence9-2

Oh and once I started talking about PIO I totally forgot about my upcoming vacation. Haha. I'm meeting my best friend from NYC. I now live in California. So we are meeting in Denver as it is about half way... should be fun. We'll def schedule some spa time and have relaxing few days!

LoveDontCostAThing

So, I got another beta today, and I listened to the message a few times and had DH listen because this number is crazy.  She said my beta is 227,136!  Could she be reading it wrong??  Progesterone is 68.31 and Estradiol is 863!

For the other blood tests, I will get them next week because I didn't know they only do them after 10:30am due to the morning being so busy. 

prudence9-2

@LoveDontCostAThing what week are you? That's an amazing number! You're def pregnant! 

LoveDontCostAThing

Week 6--but that number is like for weeks later!  Now I am OCD that it's a molar pregnancy.  I have issues.  I wonder if she meant to say 27,000...

prudence9-2

yeah, maybe she meant 27,000?

LoveDontCostAThing

Wahoo...turns out Nurse Becky has a stutter (for real, she told me) and the number is 27, 136!

prudence9-2

@LoveDontCostAThing that makes so much more sense!!! That's great your numbers are just where they should be for 6 weeks!

LoveDontCostAThing

@Prudence9 -thank you!  I felt so much better after talking to her!

Hopeful_mom

@LoveDontCostAThing I gotta tell you i know it sounds like a lot however once you start doubling the numbers every day it adds up quickly, how exciting!  How are you feeling?

Prudence9 I'm glad you became such a pro at the injections, I hope our kids will appreciate that i the future  I hate having to go to the RE as much as we always do so i can't see going for the shots too.  Its not easy at all.  I always need help with the hcg trigger those shots are the killer so BIG kudos to you!!  I hear all the time how painful those shots are, the numbness and all sounds about right...just not fun!!  I did the suppositories instead and took them at night so didn't mind it too much.  TMI i did give birth to a smurf blob.  It was a good thing the nurse told me the build up could occur and not to freak out...definitely something they should share but forget.
As for ur vaca...awww nice u gals share the traveling, denver should be really nice this time of year!!!
You know looking back at your history its really amazing how great ur first IVF cycle was to you, I know success is just around the corner for you!!

AFM: I did get the ok to start my patch tomorrow so I guess I will start priming even though I do think AF is around the corner so not sure how much priming is needed but hoping its enough...now lets see if my baseline agrees when AF arrives...

prudence9-2

@hopeful_mom yeah. It's funny but for someone that was so afraid of needles I really became a pro. Amazing what we can do when we really want something! 

And "funny" about giving birth to a smurf blob. Haha. 

My IVF cycle turned up real good. Which was a very nice surprise after 5 failed IUIs. But then the FET that I had in January took away my confidence that it will all work out 

do you you have any idea when AF coming for a visit? It is great that you can have the IVF cycles back to back!

Hopeful_mom

Prudence9 I understand you're feeling discouraged but you really have done amazing and you will continue on this journey and get your miracle.  I have my feeling defeated days but you have every reason to be in it.  You've got healthy frosties waiting for you, thats HUGE! (TMI) when my I felt the lil smurf coming if you will I totally panicked like what the hell was going on, like when your tampon isn't in quite right.  Until I solved the mystery I was in full panic mode...why they dont prepare you for these things!
I'm hoping its great I"m doing these cycles back to back, I've done this in the past with different protocols and had the worst experience so who knows.  My body is the one in charge here and i'm praying it will be on board again!  Technically AF should be here by the weekend BUT I've never been through an ER so we shall see...my tummy has been bothering me which usually is the first sign but no spotting yet so we shall see.  This roller coaster is hard cause you just never know what each day will be...
I know its hard but I believe your time is coming!
when do your tests come in?

@LoveDontCostAThing LMAO!!  saw your response after my post too funny...at least u know its all on the up and up  whens the next US?

prudence9-2

 @Hopeful_mom I can imagine how scary that was when the smurf came out. I think they don't tell us all that because they know it can happen so it's not news for them. They don't think about us, that this is our first time... really frustrating. 

Hope your body can take the toll of another ivf. Just checked and I got the period 11 days after ER. But I guess it's different for everyone. 

Btw don't think you mentioned. But did they told you what was the reason of your MC?

They will not start testing me until hcg levels are down. So it's a waiting game for me.

oh and saw saw you posted in the May FET thread. Would be fun if we end up being cycle buddies I'm also not sure May would be my month... but I hope so!

Hopeful_mom

Prudence9 I forgot they dont run the tests till after the beta is completely down.  Today is cycle day 11 but no AF even though my app says it should be showing today...we shall see.  I"m ready for it to come just to see if my body is ready to start or not.  I did start the patch today so I guess i'm ago if it take a few more days to get here too.

I never got an answer for my MC and never will  They "assume" there might have been a problem with Baby A they're still very baffled just like I am...disheartening yes!  Why its starts to make the whole process that much tougher.

The boards are better when they are March//April or May//June...thats how they used to be about 6 months ago.  Lets you usually finish your full experience in one thread.  I'm being overly optimistic and hoping it should happen IF all goes according plan.  Late May // Early June who knows.  Just praying it will be soon and work!!

@LoveDontCostAThing  how are you feeling?

prudence9-2

@Hopeful_mom they are probably right and there was a problem with baby A. But maybe before you do the FET you could ask them to test other things that may have caused this. For the small chance that baby A was also normal. I still don't know if they will find what is wrong with me. But I wish they ran more tests before my first FET. Maybe if they took care of the problem I would have finished week 12 today instead of waiting for AF to come. 

And yeah, like you I'm thinking FET will be at the end of May or early June! FX it works for both of us!

@LoveDontCostAThing hope you're feeling better!

LoveDontCostAThing

Hi,
   I agree that they should warn us of all the weird/ gross things that can happen.  I'm sure they are used to hearing it, but it would be easier for them to put together some kind of IVF manual so they don't get the same phone calls constantly!  I am feeling ok...actually, back to constipation...go figure.  I am tired...been a long week.  I am off next week for spring break...wahoo!!  My ultrasound to hear the heartbeat is on Tuesday.  I am trying to not worry too much.

Hopeful_mom

@LoveDontCostAThing  HEY!!!  glad you're feeling better was starting to worry!  I"m very excited for tuesday for u - gonna be great!!  First sono I decided to record glad i did!  Awesome u get to relax all week away from the kids!

Prudence9 I go through the same thoughts u have ALL THE TIME!!!  If I didn't see the babies that morning I would agree but they looked great AND baby A looked even better in the sono..to me anyway.  Wiggling lil toes, heartbeat was strong, its so odd!!  I think it was me yet nothing came back to prove that either.

AFM: AF arrived and i went for my baseline and I'm not really sure if i'll be starting injections tonight or not...tech said I had leftover follies, each side had one at 10.  I had an ER last cycle so how can i have "leftover" anything?  Is that a normal thing?  Having 2 that far ahead I"m not sure what it means, so we shall see.  I will say that my arm is killing from my BW today, not a happy camper 

LoveDontCostAThing

@hopeful_mom -hey, I'm okay...just trying to be less crazy and obsessive lol.  DH keeps saying everything has been going how it should be, so why shouldn't it continue?  Damn, I wish I had his positive brain.  I am excited and nervous for Tuesday!  Apparently at my clinic they count the heartbeat, but they don't have the thing where I can hear it...I'll have to wait until I switch doctors for that.  FX for Tuesday.  Also, that doesn't really make sense to have leftover follicles...did you ask how that's possible?  You're right, I thought they took everything out...

prudence9-2

@LoveDontCostAThing glad you're doing fine. Tues will be exciting!! How long along will you be on Tues?

@Hopeful_mom that is so frustrating that they didn't find what was wrong! I read about a research that said that many times, the first pregnancy is like a trial run and at first the body fights it off and then it ends in a MC but then the second pregnancy is welcomed by the body. Hope that would be the case for us!
and very strange about the leftover follicles!!!

LoveDontCostAThing

@Prudence9 -On Tuesday I will be 7 weeks, 1 day!  I hope my chemical pregnancy was the one my body fought off!

prudence9-2

@LoveDontCostAThing I hope so too! After I read about that research I started thinking of all my friends and family members that had a MC first or troubles to get pregnant for the first time and then healthy pregnancies. 

How are you feeling? 

Hopeful_mom

@Prudence9 - Yes the research does show that many people MC their first.  Its scary and I'm hoping that was it...just hurts that it had to be with twins on top of it....and that it didn't happen sooner then.  Its a cruel joke.  And then the more research u do there are even worse stories and losses people go through that I have to move on.  Today is a hard day.  With the holidays approaching I just thought things would be so different, very emotional today, it sucks!

@LoveDontCostAThing My OH was the same very positive and why should anything go wrong especially getting to double digits in weeks.  He also thought the worst would be I would MC one not two...so what does he kno.  To be honest try to be positive and just think good things.  You're pregnant and so far thank g-d your body is on board so just stay on that path.  The worst can happen and part of me was always waiting for the other shoe to drop and it did. I wasn't better prepared and miserable.  Just try to relax and talk to ur lil bean.  I will say I did that all the time, especially when I out walking.  People that i was maybe on the phone or just bonkers   

AFM: RE said not to worry about the follies and my levels were good to start stemming...so i guess we shall see how it goes.   I hate that i'm a nervous wreck already, I need my body to be on board and work this cycle.  Hoping not getting more priming in wont be an issue!  This whole process is just too much stress!  I need to get normal embabies back and thats playing on e at the moment ugh!!  Hope u ladies r having a better weekend then me!

prudence9-2

@Hopeful_mom sorry you're having a bad weekend!
glad they gave you the ok to start the stemming. Try to stay positive (I know easier said than done   )

When will you have u/s? 

AFM... tomorrow I'm having another blood test. I bet hcg levels are still not down. Ahh this wait..

Hopeful_mom

Prudence9 i'm trying theres just so much to still go, i'm not even past testing u kno...so obviously theres still a lot going through my head.  I go in tomorrow for blood work as well and assume they'll tell me to come back wed for US and blood work.  I've been there every saturday for the last month already...and that was without stemming.  I was just going through my meds and i dont have emough to get through this cycle so i need to handle that asap!

prudence9-2

@hopeful_mom yeah, I know  this entire process is so difficult. I wish there was something I could say to make it all easier. 

LoveDontCostAThing

It's all difficult no matter what point we're at!  I think until that baby is in our arms it's difficult--of course, different levels of difficulty, but you know.  I have been doing okay this week with trying to not google as much and be more positive.  I am nervous for tomorrow...like, what if they don't hear a heartbeat?  That's my major anxiety.  I read a statistic that MC probability is like 10% at 7 weeks, so that was encouraging in the sense that it is was lower than I thought.  I am trying my best to be calm...just one more day.

prudence9-2

@LoveDontCostAThing that's great that you were able to stay off google. As much as I want to I'm always googling way too much. And it's really not helpful. 

good luck tomorrow! I can imagine how nervous you must be!!! 

LoveDontCostAThing

@Prudence9 -I didn't say I stayed OFF google ...I lessened my googling...lol.

prudence9-2

@LoveDontCostAThing haha!!! 

prudence9-2

Got the blood test back. Hcg levels down to 78... 

another blood test next Monday... ahh

prudence9-2

@LoveDontCostAThing good luck today!!!