STM's advice on Baby Gear — The Bump
July 2017 Moms

STM's advice on Baby Gear

Stm what are some of the must have products and products to skip? 
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Re: STM's advice on Baby Gear

  • We are minimalists and inherited a lot of things that aren't great, but function fine. So with that context:

    Our personal Essentials list:

    -boppy
    -Ergo (specifically this brand, after trying others)
    -bouncy chair that vibrates
    -bassinet
    -ridiculous amount of burp cloths
    -10 onesies and 10 footie jammies in 0-3 and 3-6 month size
    -Aden and Anais muslin swaddle blankets (our LO hated all swaddles so we rolled our own and he was fine)
    -one very soft blanket

    We were gifted a swing which we loved, too. Not sure if it's "essential" but very nice to have, yes. 

    We didn't get anything else, and did fine with just this stuff for the first two months (plus diapers). Other things can make life easier but for us, weren't essential. (E.g., we like our own backpacks vs a diaper bag. And we didn't use a stroller or car seat for the first three months because we lived in large cities.) 
    lph4248mrscate88fionalouise007
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  • Must haves:  bottle sterilizer, boba 3G (or any baby carrier that you love!), infant playmat, jumperoo, video monitor (doesn't need to be color or anything crazy), pack n play, life insurance for you/spouse, car adapter for breast pump 

    skip (just my opinion): excessive clothes, bottle warmer, high end/super expensive shampoo/body wash, expensive diaper bags, a changing table...I'm sure there's more

    i think my biggest regret was being excessive! I felt I needed everything...and then 2 of it. They grow so quickly so don't go overboard on clothes/shoes. Buy quality items when it matters....we spent more on car seats, strollers, baby carrier bc we used them daily. 
    lph4248
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  • Must: 
    pack n play
    swing (we had a mamaroo and she hated it)
    plain ol onesies
    video monitor

    skip:
    millions of bottles (they may not like that one kind)
    bottle sterlilizer (never used once)
    changing table
    diaper bags
    SHOES FOR BABIES
    stroller (we never used our expensive one. Just baby wore and then used a cheap ass umbrella stroller when she was older)
    TTC: 1/2014 BFP: 9/24 EDD: 6/8/2015 Sorry for the poor man's siggy...ticker won't load regardless of how many tips I read.
    alcrimmins
  • I originally posted this bc I LOVE baby stuff but also hate having stuff I don't use. And I wanna buy more. Also I'm trying to decide if I should buy another rock n play (we lost ours somehow) it was so nice to have but we only used it two weeks. 

    Needs:
    -boppy one for upstairs and one for downstairs. I'm also taking mine to the hospital this time. 
    -bag for diaper bag- I use a large purse most of the time
    -Tylenol and ibprofin on hand (ibprofins after 3 months or something tho) 
    -changing table- it's the only way to keep ds in one spot and not run away or squirm while changing poopy diapers. Also dh has a bad back and he doesn't have to bend over as far. 
    -lots of blankets-(don't buy yourself tho) when we had any accidents-leaks or spit up we just washed the blankets and we got tons from showers and I thought it was stupid but we ended up using them. we also had an October baby. 
    -bag for outings- I used a large purse-that's just my style

    Wants:
    -baby carrier- I liked the stretchy moby for an infant but it's expensive for what it is and how long you use it. I also love the ergo but I'm not a huge baby wearer it's  more for when we go on hikes. 
    -baby swing-ds was rolling at 2 months so we didn't get much use
    -baby jumper-you are not suppose to leave baby in these for to long so I didn't find them useful
    -baby monitor- we have a video one that we keep in the garage. Our house is small so I can hear ds in his crib even from the basement and even outside when the windows are open. I went two months without one before getting one as a gift. 
    -baby shusher-I might buy one but we used a YouTube video when we got winded-I feel like $30 might be worth it

    Skip:
    -sound machines, music machines-just didn't work for us
    -specific play mat-we used a blanket after ours got ruined
    -cold teething toys-this was probably just for us but ds didn't care for teething toys 
    -bottle warmer
    -wipes warmer
    -bottle sterilizer-I sterilized once with boiling water before use and will once before next baby. I would have if baby was super sick with something. I was told not to do it to much or the plastic becomes very brittle. 

    PinkPrincessPiper
  • I think it's tough to create a must have/must skip list because it really will be different for everyone and it often comes down to trial and error. I'd definitely make sure you have diapers and onesies/footie pjs in multiple sizes and stacks upon stacks of burp cloths. But other than that, it's really a personal preference thing - some babies will like being swaddles, others will hate it, so swaddling cloths, for example, may or may not be an essential.

    Case in point: some people really don't find much use for the changing table. In our case, we had one for six months and then packed our house up to move 9 months ago and haven't gotten it back yet (deployment/pcs). So, for 9 months, I've really, REALLY been missing the changing table. But I am also 5'9, my husband is 6'2, so the floor is a pain in the ass, the bed and couch has us leaning at a super uncomfortable angle for our backs, and we don't appreciate our wiggly, 26 lb toddler getting poop on the couch or the sheets when he moves suddenly and we haven't finished cleaning him. A changing pad helps keep him still and gives us a cover to change in case of an accident, and the changing table puts him at the right height. So, while maybe not "essential" (I've clearly managed for the last 9 months), I really, really miss it. A shorter individual may not have the same complaints, though.

    Same goes for my glider/rocking chair. No other sitting surface allows for quite the same angle for me to effectively rock him to sleep (still necessary for naps, though we're weaning off it). And as o get more and more pregnant, getting my butt off the floor after holding him while not waking him is a royal pain in my arse.

    So, with that grain of salt, I'll say that for us, a movement monitor was essential to my (yes, my) ability sleep at night, a bassinet, a boppy pillow (although I rarely used it for nursing support - it was super helpful with encouraging tummy time in the beginning for us), and we could not have survived the last 9 months without a pack n' play, which is what my son has basically been sleeping in for the better part of a year. It also allows us the flexibility to stay out at friend's houses past kiddo's bedtime, since we can just set it up in a quiet room and he can crash and we can continue to enjoy ourselves.
    Married 25 May, 2013
    William Alexander born 18 September, 2015
    Harper Grace born 9 June, 2017
    Colton Miles born 9 June, 2017
    Bowen James due 19 June, 2019
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    caribbeanmama-2
  • I think these lists are useful, and I used them with my first, but really think about your lifestyle and how these suggestions might pertain to you. Like, I'm looking through all these suggestions, thinking "yeah, no, we never used that," and "what? Skip? We used that EVERY DAY."

    For example, "must" is a pack 'n play? Why? Do you live on a multi-level home? Do you travel a few times a year or more? Will the baby sleep in your room for a while? Then yup. Definitely grab one (we got ours for $30 second-hand). But...If you live in an apartment or small home, and the baby will go to the crib from the get-go, then you probably don't need a pack 'n play. We had a travel cot that would have worked just as well (and we never used, so for us, that travel cot was a waste of $40).

    So, here's my list.

    Must: 
    swing (we got a compact one, we hate the huge ones)
    sleepers/onesies
    video monitor
    stroller (we got an inexpensive one, because we just knew we wouldn't be going on walks all the time--we'd need it for the mall 4 times a year)
    Diaper bag or SOME sort of bag (I like a backpack)
    A few bottles of a few kinds to try out
    Rock 'n Play Auto Rocker (YES, the one that rocks by itself, for real--I felt like the other one was useless)
    muslin swaddle blankets (Yes, A&A is fantastic, but I've gotten cheaper ones that are just as soft and the same size)
    Burp Cloths (we liked the A&A ones that can be used as a burp cloth and a bib at the same time--double duty)
    high chair (but, we liked the cheap ones that just attach to a kitchen chair--it's portable for vacations and doesn't take up extra space at all)
    Projector/white noise (we STILL use this EVERY night--we've burned through 3 of them)
    Wubbanubs (for us--you might want to grab a few binkies to try or none at all if you are against that)

    Nice to have:
    Pack 'n play
    Bottle warmer
    Baby gym
    Mobile (we got a $6 adapter with a battery to attach ours to, because ours was the wind-up kind, and that's just stupid--you could also make your own and attach it to this thing)

    skip: 
    bottle sterlilizer (never used once)
    changing table (we did the attachment on top of a dresser, but you really could just put a pad on there as long as you secure it)
    SHOES FOR BABIES
    bouncer things (our kid hated that shit--wait until you get a feel for your kid--they might like it)

      ****TW: Pregnancy, loss and children mentioned****
    Me: 35  DH: 38  |  Married: 6/2013  |  Pregnancy #1, APurp born 10/2014
    Pregnancy #2, BFP 6/4/2016, MMC at 9W, D&E: 7/21/16 | Pregnancy #3, BFP 11/22/16


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    lph4248PurplePoppy424ECarson84
  • morgaritamorgarita member
    edited December 2016
    Agreed that this is a per child/parent basis! I think it's also great that people mentioned just using a backpack, you don't think of that until someone says it. 

    I forgot to say I will skip on baby bath tubs (used the sink and then bathed them with me), baby bath towels (too thin, why have two sets) and expensive bath toys (they get nasty so fast, I buy mine from the dollar store once a month or less). 
  • As hard as it is for some FTMs, second hand is worth it for, like, EVERYTHING (except maybe the car seat).  As PPs have said, you need to do what works for you.  For example, I had a changing table (the changing pad thing for the top of the dresser), and literally used it until we potty trained.  We visit people a LOT, so we loved the pack and play for travel, but NEVER used it in the house.  We STILL have the video monitor in DS's room (he's 3 1/2) so I can see if he is sleeping or playing.  Once you figure out the bottle you'll use, buy only like 10 of them (tops), and don't bother with the tiny ones.  We never used a sterilizer, and got over the warmer quickly.  I wouldn't use it again.  I would not get a wipe warmer, they just dry out the wipes.  DS did not use a sound machine, but he had a paci until this fall (I know, I know...*cringe*).  We got a million receiving blankets, and just used the little ones as burp cloths.  He has always loved snuggly blankets.  We had him in a rock and play for a few weeks after he was born, but all his moving and little sounds kept me from sleeping, so he went into the crib in his room.  This one will probably go right into the crib, too.

    The other things honestly have a very short period of use (bouncer, swing, infant seat (bumbo?), walker, jumper).  I would see what you can borrow, rather than buy...they aren't worth the cost/storage space for the 2-3 months that the kid gets out of them.  DS loved the bouncer seat for a hot minute, and then the same with a compact (fisher price?) swing, and then a jumper thing...all of which we handed over to friends, and then they are sending them back to us for this baby.  (Rinse and repeat lol).
    virginiaunicorn11alcrimmins
  • Things I found essential:

    -Changing pad (we put ours on the dresser, but having a space to change baby was awesome)
    -Rock-n-play rocker. It helped so much with DS2 because he had bad reflux and it kept him mostly upright.
    -Moby for the infant stage, Ergo for when they get a bit bigger.
    -Video monitor
    -So many mattress pads! Protect that mattress from all the puke and leaks that are bound to happen.
    -A jumparoo. It was used for a few months but was essential for that specific stage!
    -A bag big enough to carry diapers, extra change of clothes, some toys and food and meds. I always bought large cross-body satchels because I didn't like diaper bags. 
    -A great umbrella stroller. We loved our Uppababy g-lite. 
    -Bottles and breast pump
    -Bottle sanitizer 
    -Small highchair that attaches to a kitchen chair
    -Aquapfore!!! Helps with everything from rashs and dry skin to scratches. It's a must. 

    Things that are awesome but we didn't NEED:

    -A play mat
    -A second changing station for downstairs
    -A swing
    -Wipe warmers and bottle warmers 
    -A giant stand alone high chair 
    -A diaper genie 

    The one thing I never even used was the pack n play. That was a waste for us. 
    PurplePoppy424lph4248
  • I forgot to mention that I bought the lightweight stroller that our car seat would click onto, but had a seat.  I still use that thing...love it.  We had the on the chair high chair, but ended up getting a regular one, because we have people over a lot, and needed the high chair.  We use the munchkin diaper pail still, for the overnight pull-ups.
  • This may not be the right thread for this, but any tips on politely guiding relatives and in laws to the above must haves?  When we told mil the gender yesterday, she said, oh good!  So lots of blue things!  We live in a very tiny apartment,  I tried to say, no, not lots of blue things and she said, but 20 booties could fit in one if DHs shoes!

    i fear this is a losing battle.  How did you handle mounds of unwanted stuff?  (Or prevent getting it in the first place)?


  • edited December 2016
    Like others have said, this really depends on your lifestyle. For us, these were the essentials:

    -bottle sterilizer (microwave style) maybe we're just germophobes. 
    -changing pad that can go on a shorter chest style dresser. The dresser is way more functional than a changing table. 
    -mattress pad. 
    -video monitor. We will be getting a second one of these for the new baby. DD is going to be 3 in Feb and we still have it in her room to make sure she's sleeping and not playing. 
    -bouncer. 
    -wraps and SSCs. If you want to be able to love at all, these will seriously be a life saver. 
    -bibs and burb cloths. 
    -baby blankets. 
    -good, organizable diaper bag. It's so frustrating having to dig for the thing you need while baby is fussy. 
    -Wubbanubs. 
    -boppy or other nursing pillow. Even if you don't nurse, it is super useful. 
    -nose frida. I know it sounds disgusting, but it kicks the bulbs ass. 
    -aquaphor and diaper cream. 
    -the baby bath was an essential for us because we didn't have much space in sink. And I was too fat to bathe with her in the tub at the time. This is a judgement call, but we really liked and wanted it. 

    Wants:
    -swing. It was nice to have.
    -jumparoo. 
    -froggy seat. The bumbo was awful. 
    -stroller. If you babywear, you'll rarely use this. Save your money and get a nice umbrella stroller when your toddler gets heavier. 
    -pack n play. 
    -bottle warmer. It came in handy for middle of the night feedings when my supply dried up. 

    Not needed:
    -the bumbo. That thing is so uncomfortable and the leg holes are so small. It's just a waste of space and money. 
    -walker. Just get the smaller walking toys they hold on to. 
    -all of the excessive clothes, shoes and toys they never use or play with. 
    -wait on the bottles until you know what they'll take. Same with generic pacis. 
    -tummy time mat. We used baby blankets way more often. That thing was just annoying. 
  • Thanks for the tips ladies. Question... I am fine with buying some items second hand, so I've stopped into a few baby/children's consignment stores over the last couple weeks just to see what sort of items they carry. I was fairly shocked at the price tags, it didn't seem like enough of a markdown from what I would pay for it new. I feel like if I'm only saving $5 here and there on $70 items, I might as well just coupon and use my target red card to get things new at that point.

    I also browsed their maternity clothing racks and again, well worn t-shirts were priced at $7.99. I know I could find that price point new.

    Any tips from moms that bought things used? How did you really save? Maybe it's just the area I live in...
  • I think it totally depends on you and your baby. Half the stuff on here that people loved we never used (why get your kid used to warm milk?!) and half the stuff that people said skip I loved! (We still use our big fancy expensive stroller ALL the time. It was totally worth every penny)

    I used Lucie's list for reviews on what to register for (which wasn't much, I stuck to the basics) and then trial and error for things like bottles, swaddles etc.
    caribbeanmama-2alcrimmins
  • less is best! If you plan to have more kids, go simple. 
    this is my mama of 3 advice:

    Skip the combo car seat and stroller. Just go for the car seat. 
    Id invest in a good quality umbrella stroller and baby wear. When you have baby #2 you'll most likely baby wear and use the umbrella stroller, or you'll invest in a double stroller. 
    A good carrier with hip support, you'll be able to baby wear longer that way
    Sleepers with zippers, I hate the ones with snaps. Such a pain in the dark with a moving baby. Target has awesome ones. 
    Sleeper gowns for the hospital and nb phase- so easy for changing and the nurses come and check baby very often, don't bother bringing cute frilly outfits. My babies went home in sleepers. 
    Muslin swaddle blankets, which I used for a nursing cover too
    diaper bag with back pack style straps
    nose frida
    boppy pillow
    pack n play with bassinet attachment, don't waste your money on a bassinet, you'll only use it for a couple months then it collects dust (or clutter)
    bouncer
    dishwasher basket holder for cleaning bottle parts/nipples
    a good breast pump
    skip the big set of baby furniture. It's so explosive and not well made. Go for a nice crib, just use a dresser and get a changing pad to place on top. You won't even use that very long. It's hard to change a moving baby that anywhere except the floor
  • This is hard. Honestly, things I didn't use that I couldn't return I regift to others in a different circle of friends. I returned a lot of stuff and got the things I needed, hopefully you get gift receipts. People won't always buy off your registry, and sometimes that is good bc they are experienced moms that buy things they loved that you'll end up to love. My mom over buys and gets lots of small pointless things. I struggle with this. She just thinks I'm picky. LOL
    theweevee
  • I had a friend who had a similar lifestyle to me look over my registry and make suggestions, that was a great idea and really helpful.

    Things I haven't seen mentioned:

    Portable changing pad for your diaper bag
    clips for pacifiers (to attach them to clothes when out and about)
    all hail the rock n play
    I loved my Fischer price infant bath

    We are a military family and we went through about two months without our household goods while we moved when DD was 6-8 months.  It's amazing how little you truly NEED, just diapers, some onesies and pj's, a feeding system, and a safe place to sleep.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

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    virginiaunicorn11lph4248
  • edited December 2016
    @OperaSingerMommy, AMEN!!! We are going on month 9 without our HHG (I went home for deployment because I had a 5 month old and was looking to buy a house at our new duty station, since we knew where we'd be headed after deployment), and I literally have survived on a small collection of basic clothes, diapers as needed, wipes, 4 or 5 bottles, my pump, my carrier or stroller depending on the situation (I LOVE my fancy stroller in the airport, since it also gives me a way to carry carry on items without hauling them myself, and my son and I have almost 100,000 flyer miles in the last 15 months), and a pack n play (hence my attachment to that particular item). If this experience has taught me anything, it's that you really don't NEED a ton to function. Hell, my diaper bag literally consists of 5 or 6 diapers, a pack of wipes, my son's bunny that he is attached to, his sippy cup, and a munchy mug of goldfish. That's literally it.
    Married 25 May, 2013
    William Alexander born 18 September, 2015
    Harper Grace born 9 June, 2017
    Colton Miles born 9 June, 2017
    Bowen James due 19 June, 2019
    BabyFruit Ticker
    OperaSingerMommyvirginiaunicorn11lph4248
  • edited December 2016
    For this go around, I'm starting out with: 

    - arms arms reach cosleeper (baby will have to sleep in our room for first couple of months) 
    - Aden and anais blankets 
    - ergo with infant insert
    - nail file
    - yoga ball to bounce baby with 
    - changing pad (we strap it to the low bookshelf) 
    - clothes - sleepers, onesies, and some cute bloomers (nice that we're having summer babies and don't really need to wear much!!) 
    - rock and play 
    - boppy 
    - nose Frida
    - monitor (we already have the nest in our house so we'all add on the indoor cam) 
    - breast pump 
    - white noise CD player 
    - pack and play 
    - baby bath 
    - new wash clothes

    We already have:
    - we still have our bob stroller and city mini stroller from the first go around - we used it from 0-5!! Not sure if this kid will be the same way, but we were definitely thankful to have a small, sturdy, and compact city mini for her to chill out in. 
    - bag for diaper stuff but mostly just throw in whatever bag I have
    - humidifier (although probably not necessary for a while) 



  • Oh god how could I forget about the nose Frieda?!? Screw everything else that is an absolute must. 
    TTC: 1/2014 BFP: 9/24 EDD: 6/8/2015 Sorry for the poor man's siggy...ticker won't load regardless of how many tips I read.
    satsumasandlemonsPurplePoppy424alcrimminsPinkPrincessPiper
  • Every situation is different but for me these were the musts:

    - bassinet for next to our bed, I had a c-section for both babies and this was a life-saver for the first couple months
     - pack and play with changing station, this only mattered because we had a two story house and having a place to store diapers, changing supplies, toys and have a secure place to change the baby downstairs was fantastic. Also when I had a one year old I could put her in it and have her play when she out grew the swing so I could clean and get things done
     - stroller, we will have July babies, being able to go on a walk and get some good vitamin D and get out of the house even for a few minutes is great for you and baby. 
     - swing, even though both babies didn't like it at first once they got used to it it allows you to have some down time when they are itty bitties which is as much a need as any time or convenience saving gear
  • @CrystalPDX   When I say second hand, I mean free or crazy cheap.  Otherwise couponing will be cheaper.  However...I was surprised at how much I got at my shower, so there wasn't a need for me to get much else.  This is why I forwarded it on to friends, who will be sending it right back.

    @LuLiLaEv  I agree with you 100% on the warm milk.  DS was good with cool milk from the bottle or warm milk from mommy.  And Lucie's List was so great for a FTM...I felt like it was realistic advice...and she was good about noting how each item could be important for different lifestyles.

    @Pricelessmommy3  Agree!! SNAPS ARE THE DEVIL!
    CrystalPDX
  • edited December 2016
    These are the main things we used every single day for the first few months:
    dr browns bottles
    diaper genie
    boppy
    swing
    pampers swaddlers
    Playmat 
    aiden + anais swaddles
    stroller (we currently use graco modes but will now be needing a tandem)
    sensitive skin baby wipes
    eczema baby lotion
    books
    Zipper onesies


  • @theweevee I don't advice for you but I have to say that's going to be really annoying. How can someone possibly think a baby needs tons of booties? I try to not cause conflict and my mom gets offended easily so I just keep things and hide them in the house. Then after a year donate them. 

    Oh I forgot the best pjs are the long ones with elastic around the bottom so all you do is pull them up change them and pull them back down. My grandma didn't give me these until ds was 3 months and I had to yell at her why didn't you tell me about these sooner. But I actually prefer the snaps pjs. With zippers you have to zip it all the way down and pull both legs out rather than just unsnapping what you need and resnapping. They're also great for the pediatrician just leave the legs unsnapped for shots. Less to dress when baby is screaming. 
  • LoveLee85LoveLee85 member
    edited December 2016
    Gosh, some things people said skip were my daily essentials!!! Lol So take this with a grain of salt.

    must have gear:
    -click and go car seat with a base for each car, with car seat cover to keep baby out of sun/warm
    -BOB jogging stroller! We still, 15 months later, use it almost daily! When LO wouldn't settle or be fussy, we used it in our house. Worked great!
    -baby bath tub, cheap 25$ from target. Two sides(infant and once they sit up)
    -tiny vibrating chair..only place my LO would actually sleep and enjoy being when not in my arms for MONTHS!!! Life saver!! 
    -Mammaroo swing, another lifesaver.
    -baby activity playmat, we had two different ones and used them nonstop forever! 
    -noise maker every night 
    -boppy with a few covers
    -a few wearable zip up blankets. My favorite said 'back is best' on them.
    -dr brown bottles.
    -wipes and diapers.
    -changing pad. I screwed it onto my dresser and put it in LO room, it was almost free. Some are so expensive! 
    -the cheap play rings toy, my LO still plays with them! 
    -co sleeping basket and bassinet.
    -also, pnp if comes with the bassinet cover(not the actual basket one)is great for bassinet next to bed. The piece that basically makes the floor of the pnp at the top. Make sense?
    -board books from birth, he loves books.
    -skip shoes and loads of clothes. LO lived in feetie jammies around the clock in newborn size. Easy, cheap, soft and warm. At 2.5 months old we were snugg in 6 month clothes and I remember being so grateful I didn't go insane in the baby clothing department! 

    I know I'm forgetting stuff, but it's early and LO hardly slept last night. We both have colds. I didn't take the minimal approach and I'm sure you can get by with a lot less, but I swear sometimes it felt like even I didn't have enough things to do with him. Haha. I'll probably be adding to this. 

    ETA: we lucked out and pretty much 100% of everything, aside from wipes and diapers, were given to us new or hardly used!!!! I saved it all for this baby, so we won't need to buy much of anything besides diapers and wipes again!! Such a blessing. Shop second hand, no shame!!!
  • All I can add to the list is that I loved the baby sleeper gowns. The ones that don't snap at the bottom,  but instead have a ring of elastic. Those were a godsend when I was exhausted and doing midnight  diaper changes. 
    Pregnancy Ticker
    morgaritasatsumasandlemonsXath
  • mslynn2012mslynn2012 member
    edited December 2016
    This varies SO much for each baby.

    With my first I could have skipped pacis, baby carriers, the rock and play and the pack and play. I relied a lot on my boppy for nursing (recovery from my section was a b!tch).

    With my 2nd we could have skipped the bassinet (my first used nightly for 3 months, 2nd never slept a minute in it), but relied heavily on pacis, baby wearing, and slept in the rock and play. We didn't use the boppy as much as my recovery from my 2nd section was a breeze. 

    ETA- neither of my kids liked being swaddled, so I could have skipped those for both. 
    married 7.18.12   DS1 4.29.13   EDD 11.23.14

    image
    image

    my happy boy

  • As hard as it is for some FTMs, second hand is worth it for, like, EVERYTHING (except maybe the car seat).  As PPs have said, you need to do what works for you.  For example, I had a changing table (the changing pad thing for the top of the dresser), and literally used it until we potty trained.  We visit people a LOT, so we loved the pack and play for travel, but NEVER used it in the house.  We STILL have the video monitor in DS's room (he's 3 1/2) so I can see if he is sleeping or playing.  Once you figure out the bottle you'll use, buy only like 10 of them (tops), and don't bother with the tiny ones.  We never used a sterilizer, and got over the warmer quickly.  I wouldn't use it again.  I would not get a wipe warmer, they just dry out the wipes.  DS did not use a sound machine, but he had a paci until this fall (I know, I know...*cringe*).  We got a million receiving blankets, and just used the little ones as burp cloths.  He has always loved snuggly blankets.  We had him in a rock and play for a few weeks after he was born, but all his moving and little sounds kept me from sleeping, so he went into the crib in his room.  This one will probably go right into the crib, too.

    The other things honestly have a very short period of use (bouncer, swing, infant seat (bumbo?), walker, jumper).  I would see what you can borrow, rather than buy...they aren't worth the cost/storage space for the 2-3 months that the kid gets out of them.  DS loved the bouncer seat for a hot minute, and then the same with a compact (fisher price?) swing, and then a jumper thing...all of which we handed over to friends, and then they are sending them back to us for this baby.  (Rinse and repeat lol).
    100% this. Yes.
  • As hard as it is for some FTMs, second hand is worth it for, like, EVERYTHING (except maybe the car seat).  As PPs have said, you need to do what works for you.  For example, I had a changing table (the changing pad thing for the top of the dresser), and literally used it until we potty trained.  We visit people a LOT, so we loved the pack and play for travel, but NEVER used it in the house.  We STILL have the video monitor in DS's room (he's 3 1/2) so I can see if he is sleeping or playing.  Once you figure out the bottle you'll use, buy only like 10 of them (tops), and don't bother with the tiny ones.  We never used a sterilizer, and got over the warmer quickly.  I wouldn't use it again.  I would not get a wipe warmer, they just dry out the wipes.  DS did not use a sound machine, but he had a paci until this fall (I know, I know...*cringe*).  We got a million receiving blankets, and just used the little ones as burp cloths.  He has always loved snuggly blankets.  We had him in a rock and play for a few weeks after he was born, but all his moving and little sounds kept me from sleeping, so he went into the crib in his room.  This one will probably go right into the crib, too.

    The other things honestly have a very short period of use (bouncer, swing, infant seat (bumbo?), walker, jumper).  I would see what you can borrow, rather than buy...they aren't worth the cost/storage space for the 2-3 months that the kid gets out of them.  DS loved the bouncer seat for a hot minute, and then the same with a compact (fisher price?) swing, and then a jumper thing...all of which we handed over to friends, and then they are sending them back to us for this baby.  (Rinse and repeat lol).
    100% this. Yes.
    Yep - agree with all of this - we're also in that awkward place where we already have a kid so definitely wouldn't expect anyone to buy us anything but said kid is 5 and we got rid of most of that baby stuff... which means we're definitely being more mindful re: what we actually need. I'm starting my Amazon baby registry and adding stuff we think we may need at some point so we can buy it at discount after baby is born, but for the most part, i just continue to scour the local mom boards for stuff and we're getting a lot of second hand stuff from friends which we'll in turn pass along to the next family. 
    We got our Arms Reach co-sleeper for free off the local mom board, some maternity clothes, and the rock and play, activity table, activity mat, etc from friends. My ergo and infant insert are coming back to me as the family we lent it to doesn't need it anymore... the only thing we intend on buying are car seats, some clothes, and bath/feeding stuff (just, you know, I get skeeved out by second hand bath and feeding stuff, but that's just me)


  • It definitely depends on the baby/mom so take everything with a grain of salt, get what you can afford and don't go overboard especially if you don't have the space for a million baby accessories.

    Our must haves for both kids were:
    -swing
    -pack n play (they slept in this for 8 months until they went to their own room)
    -the swaddles with the velcro
    -plenty of onesies and socks
    -boppy
    -pajamas that zip up, if someone gets you the button up ones return them! You will save your sanity and your marriage because those late night diaper changes with button up pajamas are nearly impossible. 

    Things that we had but weren't totally necessary to survive:
    -moby wrap
    -baby toys
    -fancy diaper bag (after DS turned one we just used a backpack and it was much better)
    -receiving blankets, I agree with a PP don't buy these you'll get a ton for your baby shower. 
    -stroller 

    We also had a rock n play that we never used, we never used our baby baths and baby towels were way too thin. 

    Daisypath Anniversary tickers

    Married: 05/26/2012

    DS Born Happy and Healthy via C-section: 10/04/2013

    Natural M/C: 07/08/2014

    DD Born Happy and Healthy via Emergency C-section: 06/30/2015

    BFP #4: 11/15/2016

    EDD: 7/27/2017



  • chudson5 said:
     life insurance for you/spouse

    high end/super expensive shampoo/body wash, expensive diaper bags
    1)  I cannot stress this first one enough.  DH and I just moved into our first, newly built home and now we're expecting baby #1.  We promptly set up life insurance for both of us.  You gotta protect your shit ladies!  lol   

    2)  My shampoo, body wash and diaper bags are expensive specifically because I am chemical-free.  I just spent $65 on my diaper bag and that was a sale!  Cheap, chemical-free products are an oxymoron.  

    I second change tables ... I'm not even buying one at all.  I only know 1 person that changes her kid on a table. The rest use the couch, the floor, the counter ... haha! 
    Me: 29 DH: 31 SS: 12
    Met: 08/2001 Dating: 07/2004 ~ Engaged: 11/2009 ~ Married: 06/2011
    TTC: Since 09/16 ~ BFP 10/28/16 ~ EDD 7/5/17
    Team Pink * Canadian Bumpie
    satsumasandlemons
  • @stokesm21 what brand diaper bag did you buy? 
  • edited December 2016
    I was gifted something like this and have used it literally every single day since my son was born (almost 19 months): 
    https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B0145QF41E/ref=mp_s_a_1_5_a_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1482957804&sr=8-5&keywords=portable+changing+pad

    Also, when my son started eating solids, we were washing a million bibs until we wised up and got these. We use them several times a day, and always get comments on their genius from other parents (dishwasher safe!):

    https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00ZQQQM28/ref=mp_s_a_1_1_a_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1482957904&sr=8-1&keywords=silicone+bib

    edited: bibs not bins
  • Must haves:
    mamaroo - DS hated a regular swing but loved the mamaroo
    changing pad - ours goes on his dresser and is used for every diaper change when we are at home
    wipe warmer - thought these were so dumb until DS screamed through every diaper change from birth until someone suggested he hated cold wipes
    dr. Browns bottles
    a million receiving blankets
    nose freida
    triple paste diaper cream
    video baby monitor 

    Skip:
    Bumbo 
    White noise machine
    infant bath tub 
  • Well we gave away most of our stuff after baby #2 so I'll only be getting my must haves:
    - car seats (dionos since we will need 3 across)
    - rock n play (can get for $20 on CL....literally used every day)
    - nosefrida (already have but will get one for baby)
    - travel highchair (used the one we had all the time)
    - regular high chair (thankfully already have that...grace blossom I think)
    - diaper genie (still have)
    - nursing pillows (need 2 to have in different areas of the house...will get premium...prob from CL)
    - changing pad (still have)
    - bottles and pumping supplies (will buy these new. Probably medela as we used that before. Maybe the glass ones)
    - pack n play (have as we kept for guests which is great. Baby will sleep in this for first 3-4 months)
    - binkies but will wait to make sure baby likes the ones the hospital gives.
    - white noise machine (still have)
    - black out curtains (still have)
    - stroller (love our bob and just got a piece so #2 could stand). We used this waaay more than our double bob.
    - baby carrier. We will likely go with an ergo this time around. We had a bjorn that we gave away and that was good too.

    worried less about but totally understand why others would buy:
    - Swing
    - play mat
    - infant bath tub 
    - baby monitor (just never needed it)
    - diaper bag (really any bag will do)

    waste IMO:
    - bumbo
    - wipes warmer
    - car window shades
    - baby toys bc you'll get here from everyone else
    - baby shoes

    Babies are so different though and our parenting styles will be too. I recommend not opening anything until you need it. You can exchange it if it never gets used. I'm also a big fan of the Amazon registry bc you can add items from any store. So if you just want two items from pottery barn baby you just add them to Amazon instead of creating another registry. Babies r us is always nice though for the people who prefer to shop in person.


    Baby Q born on 7/20/2017
    Baby Birthday Ticker TickerBaby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    ljd2010
  • cait32cait32 member
    edited December 2016
    I'm a FTM, so loving reading these tips! I'm throwing this out there because I was glad to have advice from a "professional," but please take it with a grain of salt if it worked for you...I'm only passing it along. I have a very good friend who is an OT who works with infants and she has a huge issue with bumbo seats. She said it prevents LOs from developing the appropriate posture and core strength for sitting up on their own. Now, that said, she works with LOs who have other issues and I'm sure if a baby is doing plenty of sitting on his/her own its no biggie, but she just highly recommended to me to avoid it. It's sort of her soapbox issue. Again, just passing it along in case its important to anyone but not shaming anyone who's used them--lots of my other friends have!
    DSS: March 2006
    DD: July 2017
    DS: February 2019
    BFP #3 TW ended in CP March 2020
    BFP #4 - TW ended in CP August 2020
    BFP #5 - due October 2021
    morgaritasatsumasandlemons
  • I didn't register for a rock and play for my first and a friend of mine (experienced mom) gave me one saying it was a must have for her. My DS slept in that thing (naps and at night by our bed) the first 2 months of his life and he loved the vibration. Random. With the next baby I'll be keeping the current one on one floor of our house and investing in a second, self-rocking one for another floor.

    We also used our Ergo and infant insert a ton and had a good jogging stroller. He was a summer baby and we like to stay active. 

    Agree on avoiding jammies and other clothes with multiple tiny buttons at all costs. They are the devil. Velcro swaddles were clutch. The more bottles you have once you know which ones work for you, the fewer dishes you have to do. I'm still using our changing pad and table at 19 months and I'm sure we'll continue until he's fully potty trained. We didn't find out gender partially so we wouldn't end up with a ton of unnecessary clothes and he pretty much lived in plain white onesies for the first several months if his life.  No shoes until daycare requested them around 10 or 11 months I think.  Still using the video monitor and will add a second camera for baby 2.

    Never used the wipe warmer and he didn't like the swing. 
  • Things we love:
    - PNP with bassinet attachment for sleeping before moving to crib
    - We had a spitter so millions of burp cloths
    - sleepers with zippers
    - Baby playmat (used for 7-8 months)
    - Formula samples (even if you plan on breastfeeding)
    - Diaper cream in the tubs, just buy the tubs 
    - Baby Bum diaper cream spatula for getting to the bottom of the tub (not necessary but makes my life easier)
    - Changing pad for dresser
    - Rocker/Recliner for nursery
    - Swaddle me wraps (any swaddle with velcro)

    Unnecessary for my family:
    - Boppy (never used)
    - Bumbo (used very short period of time)
    - Baby food maker (use a blender)
    - Diaper or Milk warmer
    - Blankets (we use them now but dd hated them until 18 months and you will receive TONS)
    - Tons of sheets (3-4 are fine)
    - Shoes and fancy dresses (cute but the dresses are SO hard to get on and off)
    - Expensive clothes (We had a blowout EVERY TIME her car seat was in the shopping cart. Threw away tons of clothes)
    - Diaper pail 
  • mrscate88mrscate88 member
    edited December 2016
    We kept it really simple with baby # 1 and I'm so glad we did! Going minimalist for round # 2 as well, and wouldn't want it any other way. 

    Our must haves: 

    - Boppy pillow (used daily, especially when baby was sick and had breathing trouble)

    - Bouncy chair that vibrates (or the vibrating rock n play) 

    - Oversized swaddle blankets (we use SwaddleMe Muslin blankets) 

    - Couple packs of onesies and sleepers (avoid anything with a lot of buttons or snaps) 

    - Nosefrida and saline drops 

    - Burp cloths (or use baby blankets, but there will be lots of spit up and slober to clean up) 

    - Bassinet or Moses basket (just somewhere safe for baby to sleep) 

    - Baby bath tub (we used it a lot, baby loved it)

    - Diapers and wipes obviously

    - Ergo 360 carrier (gifted to us, but definitely became one of our essentials during the early months) 

    - Infant car seat and stroller 

    We didn't buy any toys, fancy clothes, play mats, bumpo chairs, bottle or wipe warmers, baby food makers, diaper pails etc. When baby was 6 months and sitting on her own, we bought a high chair, but that's definitely not an early necessity. 

    Breastfeeding makes it easy because there are no bottles and no clean up, unless baby has to go to daycare.

    My # 1 tip is to keep it simple. If you're not using it every day, don't waste the money. Babies grow and change so fast. 

    ETA: We did have a PNP but always coslept and baby hated playing in it, so it ended up being more of a storage crate in our living room *insert eye roll*
    PinkPrincessPiper
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