Pregnant after a Loss

GTKY -10/24

How did you meet your husband/SO? Was it love at first sight or something that happened over time?

Re: GTKY -10/24

  • HGRichHGRich member
    edited October 2016
    Oh I love this. I can't wait to hear everyone's stories.  <3

    I met DH in college. I was a very rational, unromantic teenager, and I thought school and good grades were far more important than boys. I also thought most boys were pretty stupid. I had some good guy friends and a few crushes in high school but in college I was not really looking. I was open to the idea but not pursuing. 

    Well thanks to my "guys are friends and that's it because I don't like them enough to date them" attitude I inadvertently friend-zoned one guy who was spending a lot of time with me. Later found out he was only interested in something casual and uncommitted which I was not interested in at all. I was determined not to waste my time with casual dating and only date someone I thought I could marry. 

    Well after thar guy got mad at me it left a bad taste in my mouth and I started to second guess the motives of all my guy friends (how naive--now I realize guys just aren't your friend unless they're interested in something else. This naivety was the direct result of not bothering to date in high school hahaha). 

    Anyway, too much backstory here. Around that time I had just added a major in philosophy and religion and was really interested in what my college had to offer for conferences and retreats. I signed up for a conference at a seminary in Kentucky and it turned out DH was on it too. And it was valentines weekend. 

    Well for some reason I got a massive crush on him. Not very characteristic of me. I did all the stupid things: waiting in the hall after class when we were in the same building. Asking people about him. Getting to know his sister better. I was kind of a creep. Haha. Found out later he was not interested in me then. But then, we ended up being selected for the same trip to Europe in May of that year (2010), and we had a lot of time on planes, busses, and in hotels to get to know each other. When we got back to campus I was selected for the summer work program to work on campus and pay my room and board. So I didn't know if I'd see him all summer. 

    However, a couple weeks later he sent me a text and just started chatting. We spend the whole summer talking via text and Facebook chat. He came to campus a few times and we hung out in group activities because we didn't know what our relationship was at the time. Turned out though that between April or so and mid summer he thought one of his friends was into me, and unfortunately I was so comfortable with this friend that I talked to him much more and was shy around DH so I made it worse. And he wanted to honor the bro code. Well finally late summer he figured out he was mistaken and I was all his. Haha. 

    He finally defined the relationship in September. We dated for a year, and on our one year anniversary he proposed. We were engaged ten months until I graduated and got married in 2012. 

    I love that he's the only man I ever dated. I knew what I wanted, he had it, and we're perfect for each other. I mean things aren't perfect, but I'm so glad I have a man committed to working things out and fighting for "us." 

    Sorry, that was a book! I love love stories!  :p

    TL;DR: met in college, first man I ever dated. Been married four years. 
  • @hgrich I love your story! That's so awesome he is the only guy you dated! I was the complete opposite in HS, boys were all that mattered, ugh I hate even saying it. I hope my daughter grows up to be an "unromantic teenager" like you. Was that just what came natural to you or did your parents have a large role in shaping you to be so focused on school? 
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  • So I met my husband at work, not very exciting I know but how we eventually got together is a little interesting.  Both my husband and I worked in the same department but in different buildings and didn't really have much interaction. We also were in serious relationships that both resulted in marriages for each of us. So neither of us were really paying attention to anyone of the opposite sex anyway. Years go by and I left my ex-husband (that's a whole other novel). Feeling excited about my new freedom I organized a happy hour for the entire department and I begged DH to go. I had zero ulterior  motives other than he was always super nice, funny and one of the head guys at the other building. I wanted my happy hour to be a big hit and for everyone to show up. I harassed other coworkers into going, he wasn't the only one. We worked in IT so really a lot of those guys aren't very social and wouldn't show up to organized events. Anyway,  he showed up, and  it was like I saw him with new eyes for the first time. I stole the chair next to him when a different coworker left for the bathroom. After talking it turned out he and his wife split up also. We both had sparkles in our eyes after finding out we were both single, lol. We talked all night, the entire following day and have been together ever since. We both wanted children and because at the time we were in our mid 30s we went on the fast track of dating, marriage and baby. We've only been together six years total and we couldn't love and appreciate each other more. He is the best person to have ever come into my life. I'm not a religious person at all, but the best way I can describe being with him is that I'm blessed he is my husband. Sometimes we talk about how we wished we could have gotten together sooner. However, we both agree we probably wouldn't have gotten along if we met when we were younger. And to be 100% honest, we both came from such horrible marriages that we truly appreciate how special our relationship is, don't take each other for granted and we don't fret over the trivial crap.
  • @Bok Bagok I love that the timing worked out so well for you both. And that your past relationships molded you into even better fits for each other. Love it. 

    My parents were mildly conservative but told me they trusted me to date when I was ready. They themselves had casually dated throughout high school before meeting each other. So I don't know.  I think it was just my personality and drive to succeed in school that I did so many activities that I didn't have time to care or wonder what I was missing. 
  • DH and I met when we were 15 working at an ice cream hut over the summer between freshman and sophomore year of high school.  We were just friends that summer, acquaintances really.  The next summer he had changed a lot and was more my type. I asked him out and we have been together ever since.  We are 36 now so 20 years, which seems crazy.  We went to different HSs, colleges and then as soon as I graduated got an apt together. We got married ten years after we began dating.

    DD1 born 5/24/10.

    Missed M/C at 14 wks Feb 2012.

    DD2 born 5/14/13.

    Missed M/C at 9 wks July 2015.

    Expecting someone new 4/17/17.
  • @mwoodside wow! That's a story that's heard less and less often! Very cool!
  • Met in grad school in the library... boring right?! But when I saw him the first time I was so drawn to him and I went up to him and initiated a conversation, which was not like me. He asked for my number, called me that night, and the rest is history! We dated for almost six years before we got married and now married for 6 years 
  • DH and I went to the same middle school but we didn't start dating until sophomore year of high school. At the time I was looking for a boy who "fit my list" and wouldn't settle for anything less. I had the half blessing half curse of having friends who were more attractive than I was who always had boyfriends but I saw how miserable they all were. I wasn't looking for a husband per se but I also didn't want a bad boyfriend so I made a small list of qualities that I thought would get me a good boyfriend: interested in school, my mom liked him, would respect my personal space and shared my religious beliefs. DH was not the normal boy I was attracted to (skinny skater boys at the time lol) he still had some baby fat and wore dumb screen print tee shirts lol. But I knew he was interested in school (he was our valedictorian from day one) so I figured I could investigate him to see if he fit the rest of my list. Turns out he had a crush on me and I had no idea. We were both in orchestra and we sat next to each other on the way to Washington DC for a concert at the navy memorial. I used to long (12 hour) ride to get to know him and he asked me out on a date. We dated for about 6 months before I was sure I liked him enough to let him kiss me (my first kiss) and we got married after our junior year of college. This coming March we will have been a couple for 13 years and in May we will be married for 8.
    TW: MMC
    BFP1 12/24/14 - EDD 09/07/15 (D/C 8w1d)
    BFP2 6/12/15 - EDD 2/22/16 (D/C 10w3d)
    Diagnoses and Treatments
    PCOS (myo-inositol, excercize)
    Indeterminant levels of APS IgM antibodies (baby aspirin)
    Sub-septate uterus (hysteroscopic septoplasty 12/18/15)
    BFP3 05/02/16 EDD 01/09/17 DS born 01/05/17
    BFP4 01/28/19 EDD 10/?/19 🤞🙏

  • @ceclarlinetlo another HS sweet heart story. I love those :)
  • NatalieGentryNatalieGentry member
    edited October 2016
    I love all the stories!!  My fiance was my little brother's (4 years younger) best friend in middle school and part of high school until we moved from Colorado back to Iowa. Matt always had a crush on me, but when he was in 5th grade I was in 9th grade and I considered him my little brother's troublemaking friend.  Matt and I kept in touch over the years and when my little brother, Lucas, died in 2010 at the age of 27, Matt named his son after him.  He got a divorce about 4 years ago and I got a divorce in March.  When I posted on facebook the official "we are getting a divorce, blah blah blah" Matt saw that and reached out to give me someone to vent to and talk to and I think to wiggle his way into my heart. I kept telling him "No, its too soon, I just getting a divorce." But after talking to my best friend she kind of opened my eyes and heart to the possiblity by saying something like "What if he is the ONE and the only reason you don't give him a chance is because of timing. Then you will always wonder".  So I decided to open myself up to idea of "US" and came to visit him in Colorado in April.  FELL HEAD OVER HEELS almost instantly.  He is everything I ever wanted and more.  After that I started looking for jobs in Colorado and moved here in May after securing a job on a labor and delivery floor as an RN.  It has been amazing ever since.  We are getting married on our 1 year anniversary and we got pregnant after 3 months of trying.  He and I didn't want to wait to try with my long history of infertility and me being 36.  Time is ticking.  So over the moon, I truly believe the reason I finally got pregant and so easily was because I am with the person I was meant to be with and maybe my brother/his best friend has something to do with it from the heavens.
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
  • @nataliegentry I'm not sure if it's my hormones or what but your story brought a happy tear to my eye when you said you feel head over heels for your DH.
     So sorry to hear about your brother though. 
  • My husband and I met our first year of college.  We were both in a small group of friends but I actually found him kind of annoying.  Towards the end of the year we started hanging out more and eating breakfast together.  We were in different countries over the summer but we emailed back and forth, and I realized that I missed him.  He had a girlfriend, but that ended and we started dating that fall. We got married 5 years later and just celebrated our 11th anniversary.
  • Bok Bagok Thanks for your comment. I have NEVER loved this hard and this completely before, its an amazing feeling! 
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
  • MWoodsideMWoodside member
    edited October 2016
    @NatalieGentry, your story is lovely and it totally sounds like your brother has orchastrated you guys coming together. How amazing!

    DD1 born 5/24/10.

    Missed M/C at 14 wks Feb 2012.

    DD2 born 5/14/13.

    Missed M/C at 9 wks July 2015.

    Expecting someone new 4/17/17.
  • MWoodside - Thanks! We totally believe so as well! 
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
  • DH and I was doing my masters in Ireland. He's not from there originally but moved when he was 19 to there. We met at work. I liked him and when we were just friends and i asked him to marry me, so he said yes and we got married 2 years later, and we will be married 5 years November. :)
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