UO Thursday 10/13 — The Bump
December 2016 Moms

UO Thursday 10/13

Come one come all! Will this be the week D16 finally stirs up some real deal drama? (doubt it...)

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Mother of an April '15 baby
Due December 16
sourlemontemmetimeprincesslockness
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Re: UO Thursday 10/13

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  • I totally agree ladies. @slartybartfast I love the whole "put down the pen and pick up a pencil". 

    I can't think of my UO right now, darn pregnancy brain.
    yellingbananaslartybartfastKacie209KateH1216
  • @brittnic86 I have gotten that from people with kids AND from people who don't have kids, and don't even plan on having them. I get the "this is what you're in for" advice from friends with kids, but luckily some of mine are also like, "Just cos I have a spawn doesn't mean that your kid won't be great at sleeping through the night, eating well, not being fussy, etc."

    So, I mainly get annoyed from those WITHOUT kids who think having kids just ruins your life. This was mainly from some coworkers, who are much younger than me. I would always say, "I'm in my mid-30's... I've been there and done that for A LOT of things in life. Having a kid is not going to ruin me, nor will it stop me from doing stuff. Yes, I won't be able to just do whatever I want... but that is OK. Again, I've been there and done that. Now, I will just have to plan and that is totally OK."

    Me: 37 years old
    DH: 39 years old
    Married: October 17, 2014
    TTC Since: November 2015
    BFP: March 31, 2016
    DS: November 21, 2016

    December'16 December Siggy Challenge: Elf on the Shelf Fails **winner**





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    leksiLKateH1216
  • @Kacie209 oh and you think it's bad when you're having one kid? Try having twins. :| I'm already freaked out enough, thanks. Or how people assume because you don't have kids yet, that you're absolutely clueless about babies? I may just now be having my first children, but that doesn't mean I've never been around them, or that I'm so clueless that I don't know how a diaper works.
    Pregnancy Ticker
    Kacie209
  • @yellingbanana preach! My DH is the same way. It is beyond annoying

    @slartybartfast  DH and I actually got into an argument about this last night. We were discussing holiday plans and I said hopefully we will be able to make everything as usual but we will just see how it goes when the time comes. He doesn't see a reason to miss the 5-10 parties we usually go to around the holidays even if we have a brand new baby or I don't feel up to it.
    slartybartfastKateH1216
  • @brittnic86 those people suck, it should be nothing but congrats and happiness. Yes, your life will change, but I'm sure you expect that. It will change in so many beautiful ways, there is no describing it. Just try to roll with it, and enjoy even the poopy moments. 

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    brittnic86slartybartfastleksiL
  • l9il9i
    500 Love Its 100 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    member
    @brittnic86 PREACH! 
    Me: 26 & DH: 25
    Married: August 2014
    TTC since November 2015
    BFP #1 12/17/15 - MC 1/28/16
    BFP #2 4/22/16 - EDD 12/30/16
    brittnic86DiFazette
  • @yellingbanana Thank you!

    And no, you're not the only one with a husband who turns into a 2 year old when they get sick. I think that's a given lol. Mine acts like he's dying...and when I'm sick he'll ask me what's for dinner lol.
    Pregnancy Ticker
    kbdukeyellingbananaKateH1216
  • Here we go: I really hate being a step-mom. Not worth going into all the gory details but there you have it. 

    yellingbananaKateH1216
  • UO: I don't think there is anything wrong with  us sending my 2YO to my parents for a week the first week in January so I can have a break and some bonding time with baby. No, he's not going to feel like he's being replaced; he LOVES going to his grandparents. Maybe it will be good for him to be dotting on? No, I don't need to "get used to" have 2 kids alone, I have 12 whole weeks for that. Also, if you disagree with something I'm doing as a parent, STFU. 

    yellingbananaKateH1216
  • Ditto on not canceling Christmas. My siblings are all under the age of 16, we can't just not do Christmas for them. It may be a bit of a cheaper Christmas all things considered, but the holidays don't get cancelled just because you're having a baby.

    My UO: Don't take someone on a limited/restricted diet or who has GI problems out to eat just to complain about their illness! All of last weekend was essentially us eating out with my parents and my dad complaining about the cost of eating out for me to just get sick. I didn't get sick the whole weekend and he still complained. And I offered multiple times to pay for my food but he wouldn't let me because it was my birthday and it's a pride thing for him. Even if I had gotten sick I would've felt shamed into not saying anything about it. Being sick all the time is physically draining enough without someone else complaining about it.
  • brittnic86brittnic86
    500 Love Its 500 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
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    edited October 2016
    @DiFazette hahahaha omg. Why?? Really? I would've dead pan faced said it was a two for one special :D

    @acreight13  I'm sure being a step parent is really hard =/
    Pregnancy Ticker
    phoebecar
  • @ashleaf2018 - WHAT THE HECK?!?! Oh you are going through absolute hell but think about me for a second here - I paid for that meal you're ralphing because I insisted. Whhhhaaaaaat!?!!? Your dad just made my brain implode.
    Pregnancy Ticker
    Mother of an April '15 baby
    Due December 16
    ashleaf2018
  • Argh!!! I've had a cold for about a week, but dealing with it, I've been functioning just like I always do and getting sh*t done. I tried so hard to prevent DH from getting the cold in our house, but it happened. He is sick. WHY? Why is it that men cannot handle having a cold without acting like their world is ending??? We ran out of good decongestant 2 days ago, and this morning he has a fit about why I didn't go get some yesterday. Even though I was babysitting 2 kids, plus taking care of our kids, and house, and making meals for everyone, oh and I'm 31 weeks pregnant and have the SAME cold that he does but not taking any medication and I'm not turning into a whiny baby. But when I got sick, did he do anything for me? No! I took care of myself, I made my own soup and tea. 

    Men just need to get over it. Especially mine. It's a cold, you aren't barfing, you don't have a fever, you aren't even coughing. A little congestion no reason to freak out. Get. Over. It. 

    Tell me that I'm not the only one with a DH who turns into a 2 year old when he has a cold...
    The man cold: it's real and makes me want to move out of my own house.


    brittnic86yellingbanana
  • @l9i In addition to yours, I can't stand it that people that have not spoken to me the entire time I've worked at my job (>4 years) now feel the need to comment on my pregnancy every day.
    l9iashleaf2018
  • My husband never gets sick, but when he does you better believe I'm going to get it next and twice as bad. He refuses to take meds, but he has gotten better about it. He complains when he takes Musenex because he'll be talking and stuff will come up, like it's supposed to. I tell him this but he's always hesitant to take it. Ugh, stubborn man! When I'm sick he'll take care of me, but in his time. If he's playing a video game he'll wait till he's at a point he can stop then get me what I need. Sometimes that's 20 minutes. So I end up getting it myself. 

    My UO - a lot of women hate that their belly button pops during pregnancy. I'm almost 32 weeks and I'm bummed mine hasn't!
    Married 4/12/13
    Anniversary
    TTC since 6/13
    Diagnosed w/ PCOS 4/9/15 - R/E recommended lifestyle change
    BFP 4/10/16 - DS born 12/16/2016
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    SURPRISE! BFP 3/8/18
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    l9iyellingbananacjt121413
  • @phoenix870509 Me too! I keep examining it for any signs of disappearing. I want a perfectly round bump, dang it!
    Me: 31 | DH: 31
    Together since 2003 | Married 2010
    TTC #1 January 2016
    BFP April 18 2016 | EDD December 29, 2016
    Welcome baby A! January 9, 2017

    TTC#2 March 2018
    BFP March 30, 2018 | EDD December 12, 2018
    temmetime
  • I'll join.  @cgss11 I agree that cancelling Christmas is not necessary because I am having a newborn.  But I think that just because DH and I decide not to attend a regular gathering we normally would because we may be in the hospital or home with a 1 day old and we just personally decide not to attend cancels any normal event for anyone else. 

    I think my related UO is that I don't think that Christmas (or other holiday) gifts are the most important thing.  Not purchasing any gifts does not in any way mean we are cancelling anything nor should they be mandatory.  I will add that we do not have any other children, nieces or nephews, or children siblings, who that may have more difficulty understanding.  All adults here.  And the holidays are not about gifts to me, so if we don't buy gifts, and don't expect gifts in return, doesn't mean that we are skipping Christmas.  We will definitely still attend whatever we can with the obvious limitations of labor, hospital, illness, etc.

    yellingbananacjt121413KateH1216
  • l9il9i
    500 Love Its 100 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    member
    @phoenix870509 @PensiveCrayon I'm right there with you both!
    Me: 26 & DH: 25
    Married: August 2014
    TTC since November 2015
    BFP #1 12/17/15 - MC 1/28/16
    BFP #2 4/22/16 - EDD 12/30/16
    PensiveCrayon
  • @phoenix870509 My DH never gets sick, or it's very rare. However, I feel that he's in the minority of being a baby when he is sick. And, I do belive he has a good immune system. I had Influenza B a couple years ago, and he never got it at all. I was surprised as we kept our distance, but I still slept in the same bed, etc.

    Also, my belly button hasn't popped either. But, I did notice last night that it's sticking out a little bit more than what it has. When I rub my hand over the area, I can feel it whereas before I still couldn't. I have no round belly, it's round and then goes flat. I am indifferent if I want it too or not, but maybe would round out my belly more if it did.

    Me: 37 years old
    DH: 39 years old
    Married: October 17, 2014
    TTC Since: November 2015
    BFP: March 31, 2016
    DS: November 21, 2016

    December'16 December Siggy Challenge: Elf on the Shelf Fails **winner**





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    yellingbananatemmetime
  • @H4aPartyof5  yes! Ugh I hate the hospital I'm delivering at! I was 21 with my first baby and they told me I wasn't allowed to sleep if he was in the room. Which I was like alright whatever... but a few years later when I had my second they didn't say a word about it and I realized I was probably being judged as young ftm. Third time around? They were transitioning to "baby friendly" and shutting the nursery down completely. My baby was in the NICU so I didn't have the option to have her in the room, but then they made us stay together for one night before I could go home with her. This time around I know there will be no nursery and I'm dreading it! Rest after delivery is so important especially if you've gone 24 hours without sleep or food like I have EVERY TIME. I'm contemplating signing myself out as soon as I'm ready. If they aren't going to help me I don't need them coming in and waking me and my baby every two hours. 
    yellingbanana
  • @i9i the work thing....if I could have hidden my pregnancy physically this entire time,  I so would have!! My coworker, who does the same thing as me (and is socially awkward in general) can't talk to me without her eyes bouncing from my face to my stomach every 3 seconds  ( she's in her 50s with kids,  so it's not a jealousy thing)!! Eyes up here!!!
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    l9iKacie209yellingbanana
  • @H4aPartyof5 I'm totally with you on that!  My hospital doesn't have a nursery, and as much as I want to hold, stare at, and feed my baby, I also need to get some sleep.  With my first, I hadn't slept in two whole nights and was a mess after he was born.  I really could have used a few hours of sleep, but little man was in the room with me.  One nurse took pity and walked him up and down the halls for a little while, but having a nursery would have been much easier.  With my second and third, I checked out asap so that I could go home and be comfortable and get some sleep when possible.  Needing sleep after your body suffers trauma doesn't make anyone weak!


    yellingbanana
  • My UO is that the hospital nursery (if available) is there for a reason, and that medals aren't handed out if you don't use their services.  Implying that mom's who do use the nursery are taking advantage and/or taking the easy way out is both rude and judgemental.  It's my opinion that new moms shouldn't be shamed for using a service that they may need for whatever reason (emotional/mental or physical).  Not everyone reacts to giving birth the same way.  Stepping down from my soapbox now...sorry some comments on a FB group I belong to still have me a bit annoyed.
    I am totally with you on this.  I am a FTM so I don't have experience with it but in my mind it makes sense to take advantage of the option of getting a little rest the first two nights before you take the baby home.  Also most of my friends who have had babies recently have said they felt it was helpful or wish they had done it.  We did our childbirth classes at the hospital we are delivering at and when we did the tour she mentioned the baby stays in your room at all times.  I asked what if you want to have the baby taken to the nursery at night and I might as well have asked if it was ok to let wild coyotes take the baby overnight.  I got the total stink eye and was told they will take them if I insist but that they would bring her back for feedings etc because "they are not taking care of my baby for me".  I took it with a grain of salt because the lady doing the class and tour doesn't actually work as a nurse for the hospital anymore - she is a private Douala who clearly had some pretty strong opinions on what she thought was the "right" way to approach labor/delivery/pp care.
  • @KatieJo1205- "I might as well have asked if it was okay to let wild coyotes take the baby overnight." Haha I love it! I actually had a somewhat similar experience during our hospital class! Our hospital's L&D class was taught by a nurse who had given birth med-free four times and who was also a Lamaze instructor, the president of the local La Leche League AND was the resident doula for our hospital (women who are delivering med-free are given into her care when they are admitted). At the beginning of class, she asked who was pretty sure they wanted an epidural, and I was the only person who raised my hand. For the rest of class, any time she talked about med-free childbirth, she would talk DIRECTLY TO ME. At first I thought she just had awkward eye-contact skills, but by the end of hour two, it was clear that she was trying to sell me on going med-free, which is not my Plan A. Like you, I didn't take it personally. The instructor was still very knowledgeable and had TONS of great information about med-free pain relief techniques and breathing exercises, which I absolutely intend to use if I can't get an epidural. And the fact that she was so passionate about going med-free makes me feel like I can trust her information and hopefully rely on her skills and support if I have to go the med-free route! But again, med-free is not my Plan A no matter how long the L&D nurse intended to stare me down  :D
    yellingbananakbduke
  • +1 to @slartybartfast. You are going to need to learn LOs cues, and be woken for feedings and changes anyways. So why not do it supervised and learn to sleep with their noise as soon as possible.


    Formerly known as Kate08young
    August '18 Siggy April Showers:






    Me: 28 H: 24
    Married: 7/22/14
    Baby L: 8/4/2015  August 2015 Moms
    Baby E: 11/18/2016   December 2016 Moms
    TTC #3 08/2017  BFP 11/27/2017. 
    Twin B lost 11/22/2017, Twin A doing well. 


    yellingbananaKateH1216
  • Nursery-
    I agree with @slartybartfast
    My hospital did away with the nursery, but I wouldn't have been able to use it anyway. The only way I can let my baby out of my sight is if it's with DH, my mom, or my sister. Paranoid? Yes. It's like an anxiety attack if my baby is not with me in the hospital. 

    Facebook-
    I have also unfollowed a lot of friends. In fact, I've started avoiding facebook altogether because if it's not political, it's a food post, both are torture!

    @allicat89  I tried med free and made it 7 hrs into labor before giving in to the epidural. I wish I had gotten it earlier! We have modern medicine for a reason, everyone gets to make their own choice and shouldn't be judged for it, regardless. 

    Preach it, sisters!






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    allicat89kattyc-2slartybartfastKateH1216
  • Our hospital has a nursery but they are very "Room In" with everything. However, did say that if you wanted  your baby in the nursery for whatever reason, they were totally OK with that. At the time of our tour, no baby was in there and this was about 8:15ish at night. I had been in that area 4 years ago when my youngest nephew was born and don't recall any babies in the nursery then either, and that was in the afternoon.

    As a FTM, I am playing everything by ear and just seeing how it goes. If we want LO in my room the whole time, great. If either of us need a break from him... then off to the nursery he goes. I know if we decide to circumcise, they take him to the nursery to perform that there and he would remain until it was done... so there is some rest time. 

    Me: 37 years old
    DH: 39 years old
    Married: October 17, 2014
    TTC Since: November 2015
    BFP: March 31, 2016
    DS: November 21, 2016

    December'16 December Siggy Challenge: Elf on the Shelf Fails **winner**





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