Ask a STM

birdiejo

Questions or concerns about anything pregnancy or baby related?

Have no fear, ask here! 

WinchesterGirl

When do Braxton hicks generally start?

Also, while I'm looking forward to breast feeding, I'm a little weirded out by the prospect of starting to randomly leak one day. Does that happen to everyone pre-delivery?

expandcontract

FTM here.  I read BH have already started but we don't feel them, yet.  So yes, I'd like to know, too, when do we start feeling them.  

birdiejo

I didn't get Braxton hicks or leaking with my first. @WinchesterGirl

silvercamaro77

I didn't have any leaking pre-pregnancy leaking with either baby.  I'm not certain if I had Braxton Hicks or not.  I had some tightening in my stomach sometimes, but it felt more like the baby was pushing out than I thought BH would feel.

poofwok

@WinchesterGirl after giving birth to DS, I had to pump the colostrum out of my boobs cause it just wasn't coming on it's own (can you say OUCH?).I had no issues with my milk coming in however. 

I started having BH around 28 weeks but only got them a handful of times through out 3rd tri.

JulesFo

With DD1, I got Braxton hicks around 33+ weeks. With DD2, it was much earlier, around 22+ weeks. I never leaked with my first child. The milk came in much faster and with a heavier supply the second time, but still don't think I randomly leaked. I always wore pads, though. FWIW, I had difficulty getting my supply going with DD1 because I was induced. My lactation consultant told me later it was bc 1. my body had never supplied milk and 2. My body was "put" into labor, which may have meant the milk was delayed. 

LivingLaVidaGinger

This may have already been asked but how did you ladies with dogs introduce a newborn to the dog? I have a med/large dog 50+lbs and she has never been around small children. She met my nephew once (he's 5) and she didn't really understand that the tiny humans weren't as strong as the big humans so she'd approach him to get petted and her means of doing so is leaning against you so it kind of made him stumble. Will she adjust okay? I'm very nervous about her not understanding. And training her properly to prepare her for a baby. She is also an all indoor dog and we don't use a kennel because she's just never really needed one. Thanks!

tishb

LivingLaVidaGinger said:

This may have already been asked but how did you ladies with dogs introduce a newborn to the dog? I have a med/large dog 50+lbs and she has never been around small children. She met my nephew once (he's 5) and she didn't really understand that the tiny humans weren't as strong as the big humans so she'd approach him to get petted and her means of doing so is leaning against you so it kind of made him stumble. Will she adjust okay? I'm very nervous about her not understanding. And training her properly to prepare her for a baby. She is also an all indoor dog and we don't use a kennel because she's just never really needed one. Thanks!

We are concerned about this with our bulldog. We have been working on her discipline more before baby comes. Teaching her she doesn't rule the roost, and to not jump, and more of an "if you want it, you must earn it" type of approach. 

Partyof6?

@LivingLaVidaGinger and @tishb I am positive by googling "introducing dog to newborn" you will find plenty of dog sites that have advice.   I seem to remember a couple things, bringing a receiving blanket home from the hospital with baby's scent before baby comes home, working on training before baby comes, and making sure your dog is still getting attention.   

PerraSucia

we were totally crazy people that walked our dog with an empty stroller to get her used to it too. 

LivingLaVidaGinger

@PerraSucia That's a stroke of genius. I'd never think to do that.

@Partyof6? Oh yes! My google game has definitely been strong! And we're trying to teach her simple things right now like sitting and waiting to get her food (which has nothing to do a baby) but apparently according to Google it helps teach them patience and control. She's been doing pretty well so far! She's mostly just a lazy sloth of a dog anyway lol

tishb

My dog thinks she's human. 

MLRocha

@tishb - Dying over that face.

My biggest concern about our dogs is that they get so into playing/wrestling that they have no idea what's around them.  They have almost knocked me over so many times.  Otherwise, they have always been very gentle whenever there are kids around...  Just hoping they will learn to pay attention to the little one.

LivingLaVidaGinger

Well if we're getting into fur baby pics...allow me.  

Sorry to those who find dogs on the bed cringeworthy! She doesn't sleep with us, she has a little bed beside ours, but sometimes she'll chill on top of the comforter while I'm getting ready in the mornings.

Edited to add: look at my shitty wall art! I bought those removable sticky things off amazon because I didn't want anything damaging to the walls, now they're just rolled up and gross looking. I should probably take them down now.  

Gretchypoo

RE dogs: we asked a trainer how to prep the dog and here is what was recommended:
1. Earn everything. want attention? treats? pets? do something to earn it (we do sit or down or shake)
2. bring home a "baby" to practice with--the dog needs to get used to you giving affection to something else
3. bump into your dog. when baby starts moving they won't step over the dog. the dog needs to get used that when humans come through, dog moves.
4. play videos of babies crying. get the dog used to the noise
5. practice the commands "quiet" and "drop it"

snarky14jd

I didn't have bh with my son. From what I understand (I could be wrong) is it's linked to dehydration so stay hydrated

i had my husband bring home a blanket the baby was wrapped in so my dogs could sniff it. And we brought them outside when we were bringing the baby inside so they "met" on neutral grounds.  

lct2008

With DS I did not feel any Braxton hicks at all- I started leaking a bit In 3rd tri, but it would only be like a tiny little spot and was normally at bedtime for some reason. With my daughter I had/felt Braxton hicks at like 20ish weeks. I also really didn't leak at all with her but breast fed both to over a year. So don't be concerned that if you don't leak it means bad for breastfeeding, because that's not the case. For BH Generally they say you can feel them earlier etc with subsequent babies. I've already felt some now and I'm 17 1/2 weeks. They can increase when you haven't had enough water, but they are not caused by lack of water and they aren't technically bad. It's just your body practicing for the real deal. It's just a problem if you have a certain amount in an hour. My dr it was 6 and I had to call. Because over a certain amount could be an indication of something wrong like labor close, dehydrated, etc. 

WinchesterGirl

Thank you ladies for all of your responses! It's good to know that the BH vary so much from person to person and baby to baby!

Also I know it's irrational but the leaking thing was freaking me out, so all of your responses that it may not happen at all make me feel better. Of all the things I'm going to deal with in labor/post-partum, I have no idea what that one thing stuck in my brain. FTM worries!

jlellis603

Gretchypoo said:

RE dogs: we asked a trainer how to prep the dog and here is what was recommended:
1. Earn everything. want attention? treats? pets? do something to earn it (we do sit or down or shake)
2. bring home a "baby" to practice with--the dog needs to get used to you giving affection to something else
3. bump into your dog. when baby starts moving they won't step over the dog. the dog needs to get used that when humans come through, dog moves.
4. play videos of babies crying. get the dog used to the noise
5. practice the commands "quiet" and "drop it"

Pretty much yes to all of this!

1. Nothing In Life Is Free for your pooch. That will help with control. Also teaching a "leave it" command so if you catch doggo going after the baby's toys, you can tell them to leave it
2. Get a baby doll. Practice holding it and carrying it around/sitting on the couch with it. Show the dog that when it sees you with a "baby" in your arms, it needs to be gentle and calm
3. We have been playing baby noises and crying for Kaya. When she is quiet and just curiously looking around, she gets pets and praise. Hopefully this shows her that the baby is not a scary screamy thing.
4. We plan on getting a swaddling blanket for her to sleep with and repeat "baby" in a gentle voice when we give it to her.
5. Our dog is the biggest whiner on the planet. I think it stems from her anxiety. So we plan on setting up the "play area" which is in our dining room early and getting her used to us being in there and her being gated out of it.
6. Expose them to as many kids as you can.
7. Praise and treats when they are doing something you like! Also, make sure that you work their brains. If you cant get out to exercise them because you are still recovering, do trick training and things like that and that will tire their brains out and make them less energetic.

cantalopes24

@WinchesterGirl I had BH starting around 20 weeks with both kids. I never leaked before birth with either kid.

kswiger06

@WinchesterGirl I was at my mom's house one day and told her that I would just be doing normal activities and then realize I was myself holding my stomach tight, and would have to "release" it. It was so crazy because I don't remember feeling it tighten, but I would feel exhausted from holding it that way. My mom told me is was Braxton hicks. I never felt any pain with mine, and I can't remember how far along I was, but I do know my stomach was huge, so it must have been later on in pregnancy. 

With leaking, I can't remember when I started leaking, but hope whenever someone here has their first leak, they warn the rest of this. It's pretty embarrassing walking around with milk stains on your shirt and not even realizing it, until you see your reflection. I've had "let down" feelings since right before my BFP and have been paranoid and checking for leaks since then lol.

rmpiszczek

I think I started leaking around 24 weeks? For some reason that number sticks out in my mind. BUT, it was only at night. Just a small amount on my nighttime bra when I woke in the morning (like less than a quarter size). 
And I can't remember for sure when BHs started. But mine weren't related to dehydration at all. I remember them for sure around 30 weeks. But I think they started earlier than that. 

Aussie45

PerraSucia said:

we were totally crazy people that walked our dog with an empty stroller to get her used to it too. 

I was kind of reading quick and originally thought this said you were walking with your dog IN the stroller. I was like "da fu.....?"

What you actually said makes WAY more sense.

Gretchypoo

@Aussie45 my mom has a dog stroller-- it is insane ;-)

Aussie45

Gretchypoo said:

@Aussie45 my mom has a dog stroller-- it is insane ;-)

We were at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester last week and we saw someone getting their dog stroller out and their dog. I just stared wide-eyed and asked DH if we could get one for my dog (kidding but kind of not kidding?).

Gretchypoo

@Aussie45 lol! my mom's dog has a wardrobe and she refers to the dog as my sister :-)

WinchesterGirl

We went to a wedding tonight, and I wore my only still fitting pre-pregnancy dress. It actually looked pretty cute, and it's stretchy - there is no hiding the bump though.
 
My mother's husband asked me if I swallowed a basket ball (you @$÷&*/!), I threw up in the car on the way there, and we left before they cut the cake (3 hours in and no cake? Really?).

Now it's not even 9 and I'm already laying in bed. I'm over adulting today.

ETA: I was clearly very tired last night because I meant to put this in randoms. I'm just going to go back to bed now *sigh*. 

icedrop10

We were actually told by a dog trainer not to use the baby blanket method when introducing an infant to a dog. The idea is that a dog may associate the baby scented blanket as a toy. Instead, we were instructed to act very possessive over the baby - a "this is mine, not yours" attitude. It actually worked really well with my DD. Our dog clearly got the message and kept his distance from her.  They are more interactive now that she is older. 

Ryder0406

With DD I had a ton of BH, they started late 2nd tri, I believe. This time they started 17-18 weeks :$ 

I could write a book about the dog situation! We were bad and didn't really do any prep with them. Unless your dogs have spent time around small children/babies, it's sort of hard to tell how they'll react. Even if they've been around babies, they might surprise you! Might get jealous of the attention the baby is getting (H's dog) or be protective since it's 'their' baby (my dog), if that makes sense. Dogs are smart, they sense things.

sunshine2417

Lately I've decided to start organizing my birth plan (knowing I will likely change it 500 times before the actual day) mostly because my parents are being incredibly intense and overbearing and I need to tell them to back off. Unfortunately, they only know how to be at the extremes of 0 or 100 and my anxiety doesn't do well with either.

So, STMs, my current thought is that I would like to labor at home as much as possible before going into the hospital and try (as much as possible... but flexible to changing) to go as natural as possible. Did anyone do this and did you have concerns about your baby going into distress during contractions or the baby's HR dropping while at home and not being monitored during the beginning parts of labor until you went to the hospital?

Ryder0406

I didn't really have a 'plan' per say, but basically did want you said. Labored at home from 6:30pm-10:30/11am ish. Went in and luckily was 8cm already! MW and nurse were shocked and seems impressed I'd waited that long. Long story short, I ended up all natural. It can definitely be done! All I'll add is, keep in mind things don't always go as planned. Different women have different pan tolerances and every birth is different. Some are straight forward and 'easy', like mine, but that's no always the case, obviously. Baby could be early or late, which throws a curve ball in plans. A good friend of mine had the same 'plan' as me, she ended up 2 weeks over due and had to be induced. Pitocin brought on extreme contractions and she ended up getting the epidural to cope, which unfortunately in her case, slowed labor. She almost had to have an emergency section!

My advice would be, plan to be flexible.

ETA: as far as anxiety, I luckily wasn't comcerned or worried about baby needing to be monitored. I was mostly worried about thinking I was in labor and getting sent home instead! Haha

LinnyAnne10

I didn't leak during pregnancy.. but i did leak on occasion for the next 4 years after my son stopped breastfeeding. And BH started about 28weeks ish. 

kjd291

TeacherMom2517 said:

Lately I've decided to starSo, STMs, my current thought is that I would like to labor at home as much as possible before going into the hospital and try (as much as possible... but flexible to changing) to go as natural as possible. Did anyone do this and did you have concerns about your baby going into distress during contractions or the baby's HR dropping while at home and not being monitored during the beginning parts of labor until you went to the hospital?

Most doctors offices/midwives have a certain time table they will give you when it comes to when to head to the hospital. Normally based on how often your contractions are coming, then you call and talk to whoever is on call and thwy will advise you to come in or not.   each person is very different and can take hours upon hours to need to labor at home before their contractions become strong enough, and others are ready and progress to this point really fast.  I think it's good to be prepared to labor at home for a while and avoid going to the hospital too soon, but ultimately you will decide this with the provider you talk with on the phone when you're in labor. 

And no, I wasn't concerned about baby being monitored.  As long as you're not high risk, not having abnormal symptoms,  haven't had your water break, and everything is progressing normally: baby should be just fine! You can still feel baby moving around during labor - so you can use movement to know all is good!

FreshBakedBrownies

@TeacherMom2517 I think loose goals for what you'd ideally like to happen are enough. Don't be too upset if your plan doesn't work out at all! 

With my 3 year old, my water broke first before noticeable contractions. I had to go to the hospital right away to be checked. His head actually hadn't come down and lodged against my cervix yet, so it was dangerous that I was walking around, since a cord prolapse could've happened. Who knew? But with the possibility of a cord prolapse, I wasn't allowed out of bed again. So most of the natural birthing coping techniques I learned were useless. Nothing I planned for happened, but a healthy baby was all that really mattered.

lap018

@TeacherMom2517 agree with PPs, my doc told me to come in when I was at 411 (contractions 4 minutes apart, lasting 1 min each, and this going on for 1 hour) your birth plan sounds great! Agree to stay flexible and go with the flow. Laboring at home for as long as possible was my hope too but at 41 weeks 1 day I was induced with pitocin which wasn't too bad until they broke my waters and then wow, just wow, I begged for the epi even though I had done Bradley classes and was totally prepared for natural birth, induced labor is just not as manageable. But the epi was great for me and I have no regrets about my birth story! It got me my precious son!! Good luck to you I hope you get the birth story you hope for!

Gretchypoo

@teachermom2517 your plan is the same as mine! I will say re: monitoring that, like PPs said, don't worry too much. from what ive read, there is actually no research to show that a fetal heart monitor will benefit you during labor or lead to a healthier baby if you've had a normal pregnancy. It can, however, restrict movement so that's a reason to labor at home as long as you can or as long as your doctor recommends.

sunshine2417

Awesome! Wow! Thank you so much everyone for sharing your stories and support! I'm hoping to gather as much info as possible now so that I can feel personally empowered during my labor and delivery (with Plans A, B, C, etc. and of course whatever unknowns will be thrown into the mix the day of!) Luckily I'm at the point where I'd love to try to go as natural as possible, but I'm not set on it that I'll feel disappointed if I need an epidural or pain meds. More so just that I hate feeling nauseous/sleepy/groggy, and I know I would rather try to be up and moving around, slow dancing with DH, doing some yoga or stretching on the yoga ball and such instead of laying in bed... but then again, I've never labored sooooo maybe my future self in 20 weeks will look back with sweet wisdom and chuckle at how naive current me is :-) 

Gretchypoo

@TeacherMom2517 All that movement should help your labor progress! It sounds like you've got a great attitude!

jlellis603

Has anyone used Red Raspberry Leaf tea during their 2nd and 3rd trimesters before? I stumbled across it lurking on October's board. It seems at least worth a try if it does what it says and strengthens your uterine muscles!

poetryandoceans

@jlellis603 Everything I've read says 3rd tri is okay but most naturopaths recommend not using it in 2nd tri. It works by promoting slight uterine contractions, and a lot of people view that as too risky for 1st and 2nd tri.