Trying to Get Pregnant

Benched/TTA Weekly Thread 7/25

***General TW that this thread can and will mention MC and loss.***

This is a place for those of us who have already started TTC, but have hit a roadblock and are delaying for whatever reason. You can express your thoughts, feelings, and frustrations on not TTC and connect with others who are in the same boat. TTC can be a long journey, and having to wait makes it feel even longer- even if it is for a good reason.  Feel free to resurrect this thread at any point in the week if you have something to say, and treat this like an ongoing conversation.

Benched = involuntarily not NTNP/TTC and are "out of the game," usually due to medical reasons
TTA = avoiding pregnancy by using protection or FAM, usually for non-health-related reasons __________________________________________________________________ 
 Are you benched or TTA? 

 What brings you here? 

 How long do you think you'll be here? 

 How have things been going? 

 Any R/R/CS? 

 GTKY:  What is the worst fashion faux pas you made growing up that makes you cringe/laugh now? (Think- crimped to death hair, skechers platform flip flops, jnco jeans, butterfly clips etc...)

Re: Benched/TTA Weekly Thread 7/25

  • Are you benched or TTA?  SS - benched from IF treatments

     What brings you here? moving and starting a new job

     How long do you think you'll be here? at least until the end of the year

     How have things been going? It's been 1 year since I started testing and still no baby. I am so tired of waiting for treatment

     Any R/R/CS? According to their website, wait time for an appointment at my new RE is 1-4 months, wait time for IVF after your appointment is 4-6 months. I am so sick of waiting

     GTKY:  What is the worst fashion faux pas you made growing up that makes you cringe/laugh now? (Think- crimped to death hair, skechers platform flip flops, jnco jeans, butterfly clips etc...) So many - butterfly clips, wearing sports wear all the time, platform sandals/flip flops, wearing blouses all the time, wearing chunky shoes all the time
  •  Are you benched or TTA? TTA

     What brings you here? Husband is getting surgery... he was on a pill that was all bad for sperm, and it didn't work so well for his pain, so he came off of it.

     How long do you think you'll be here? I'm not sure if we should wait for entire sperm cycle for hubs or not (3-4 months), since he took his meds for a month. But, at least 8 weeks for surgery recovery. I'll stick with December.

     How have things been going? Surprisingly good! Trying to run more and keeping myself busy! 

     Any R/R/CS? Not really!

     GTKY:  What is the worst fashion faux pas you made growing up that makes you cringe/laugh now? (Think- crimped to death hair, skechers platform flip flops, jnco jeans, butterfly clips etc...) hmmm... shorts that were just way too short! Bell bottoms with leather ties on the side, one sleeved long sleeved shirts, Rainbow toe socks, and so much more!! Haha 

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  • Are you benched or TTA? Benched but will be TTA soon.

    What brings you here? CD 50 and no O. I was starting to temp and holding out hope that I might still O because I got caught up in all the baby excitement on here. I know my body. I know I'm not going to O because of PCOS. I feel stupid for getting my hopes up.

    How long do you think you'll be here? WELL... Obviously I'm out this cycle. Then, if I even have a cycle in August, I will TTA because we are going to Jamaica in late September, so I don't want to risk getting Zika. Then, after that I'll be waiting probably 8 weeks after we get back to make sure I don't have Zika, so that puts me in November/December territory. Ugh.

    How have things been going? I have an appt to meet my new OBGYN on August 12th, so I'm optimistic about that. I plan to get a referral to an RE so I can get ahead of things for when we’re no longer TTA in December.

    Any R/R/CS? My husband is talking more about ttc and stuff and that’s huge for him. I’m excited to go on vacation, but nervous about being in a swimsuit. I’m so tired of work. Usually I like my job, but lately I’ve just been feeling so tired and burnt out. I’ve been struggling with a lot anxiety and emotions because of the hormonal roller coaster that is PCOS.

    GTKY:  What is the worst fashion faux pas you made growing up that makes you cringe/laugh now? The first thing I thought of was butterfly clips lol. OMG. Puka shell necklaces on guys also come to mind.
    SN used to be soemthingclever
    Me: 28 DH: 35
    Dx PCOS May 2015
    Baby #1 due 12/7/17
  • @LadyMillil I'm so sorry you are stuck in limbo. I hate that you have to wait. I hope things start moving along for you.

    @Nelbetron I'm impressed you are doing so well. I'm glad your wait was cut shorter than you originally thought.
    SN used to be soemthingclever
    Me: 28 DH: 35
    Dx PCOS May 2015
    Baby #1 due 12/7/17
  •  Are you benched or TTA? TTA

     What brings you here? life and timing

     How long do you think you'll be here? Until Sept 5th!!! Only 6 weeks left!

     How have things been going? IM SO EXCITED. Sometimes I think, fuck it, lets start, but then I dont wanna be pregnant of vacation.

     Any R/R/CS? None this week

     GTKY:  What is the worst fashion faux pas you made growing up that makes you cringe/laugh now? (Think- crimped to death hair, skechers platform flip flops, jnco jeans, butterfly clips etc...) Overalls with things like flowers on them (think Limited Too), and toe socks
  • Are you benched or TTA? TTA

     What brings you here? Grad school until May 2017

     How long do you think you'll be here? Officially TTC in mid-September!!

     How have things been going? I have the worlds worst baby fever... (I think I write this every time I post on this thread). But, it's getting easier as it gets closer. I have so much going on right now with school and I have some projects I want to accomplish around the house first. So, that will hopefully help! Then our anniversary is in August, my birthday is a couple days later and H's birthday should be right in my FW that we'll be trying in for the first time. Birthday sex FTW. :)

     Any R/R/CS? Just school. I posted about my group for my group project in last week's TW Tuesday. I am growing to hate these people I hardly know. I need this project over ASAP. 

     GTKY:  What is the worst fashion faux pas you made growing up that makes you cringe/laugh now? (Think- crimped to death hair, skechers platform flip flops, jnco jeans, butterfly clips etc...) Oh, all the things. So many butterfly clips, those necklaces that looked like tattoos, wearing thongs so they would purposely peek out of my jeans (ew, really I did that...). Also wearing a visor with pigtail buns above it.... eek!! I also had all kinds of ugly platform sandals with cork or twine or any other equally tacky material on them!
  • Are you benched or TTA? TTA

     What brings you here? Recent travel to active Zika transmission area

     How long do you think you'll be here? 5 more weeks

     How have things been going? Really pretty good. Trying to focus on some other things, enjoying some nice wines, not letting the baby crazies take over.

     Any R/R/CS? Since we were TTA this month anyway, I decided to take a break from temping. I'm now on CD 62 with no end in sight. I think it might be an anovulatory cycle, but I just want to get AF so I can move on. 

     GTKY: oh, there were many! I had some short-alls (overalls, but shorts?) that I rocked the hell out of in middle school. Horrible platform sandals, mood rings, Ying yang necklaces. And the dreaded "whale tale" in university.... all completely cringeworthy.
  • izza2izza2 member
    Are you benched or TTA? TTA

    What brings you here? Nursing school

    How long do you think you'll be here? Don't know. Another year or 18 months or something.

    How have things been going? 
    They... suck.

    Any R/R/CS? I may end up going on a bump break, or really sitting in the background. I've kind of already ended up there, but... This cycle I forgot to call in my prescription because that week was hectic, so I didn't start my patches and couldn't have gotten them from the pharmacy until it was way-late, so, we decided to go sans-patch this cycle because we would've had to use condoms anyways. This way, I'll have an extra box there if things get hectic again. But, of course, we're so used to not using condoms, that we tried to use one and it wasn't working for either of us, so we've been going at it without this cycle. We've done this before since TTA with no conception, but this time it just really hit me that I need to step back and stop obsessing over TTA, NTNP, TTC, when we'll start trying... I think I'd rather take this time to focus on myself, my little family, and getting our lives and our health back in order before we even think of TTC, whether we wait the full year/year and a half or something changes and we can start sooner.


    GTKY:  What is the worst fashion faux pas you made growing up that makes you cringe/laugh now? (Think- crimped to death hair, skechers platform flip flops, jnco jeans, butterfly clips etc...) Scrunchies, big barrettes, bedazzled everything

    Me: 30 | DH: 34 | DSS: 14 | DS: 4
    PG #2, EDD 10/12/2023

  • EkzerrEkzerr member
    @izza2 how far into your nursing program are you? I start nursing school next year at the end of August and we plan to stop ttc if this cycle doesn't work for us, but I'm not entirely sure I want to wait until I'm done nursing school to keep trying for our second (DD is turning 2 on August 8) as I will be 35 by then and just starting my career...I'm feeling so confused about it right now 
  • @izza2 I was on the bump like a year and a half ago and I took like a year-ish break because I was SO far from starting and it was becoming obsessive. I stopped looking at baby stuff online, stopped talking about it, and it was so good for me and for my relationship in general since I stopped obsessing.
  • izza2izza2 member
    Ekzerr said:
    @izza2 how far into your nursing program are you? I start nursing school next year at the end of August and we plan to stop ttc if this cycle doesn't work for us, but I'm not entirely sure I want to wait until I'm done nursing school to keep trying for our second (DD is turning 2 on August 8) as I will be 35 by then and just starting my career...I'm feeling so confused about it right now 
    I finished two years of my bachelor's degree, but then I failed my nursing class last semester (by ~2 points), so I've transferred to another college to do their associate's program. Otherwise, I would've had to wait another year to re-take that class, and with how expensive that college was, it made zero sense.

    We initially tried for 3-4 cycles last year (August-November) with the hopes that we'd have a summer-baby so I wouldn't miss any of the school year and it wouldn't put me back at all. When we started TTA, we were planning on trying again this year for another 3-4 cycles, but H said he just wants to wait until I'm closer to being done. I get where he's coming from, but a lot of the fears in his head are put there from his step and biological mothers. They've both (especially his step-mother) said that if we had a baby while I'm in school, I would drop out and never go back to college and we'd be out all the student loans we've taken out. His step-mother had that happen to her, so she was the first and most vocal one to put that in his head. And, I understand the fear, but... I'm not them. We have a lot more support than they ever did.

    Are you going for your AAS or your BS? How long of a program is it?

    kiwi2628 said:
    @izza2 I was on the bump like a year and a half ago and I took like a year-ish break because I was SO far from starting and it was becoming obsessive. I stopped looking at baby stuff online, stopped talking about it, and it was so good for me and for my relationship in general since I stopped obsessing.
    I'm good 70% of the time, but once every couple of months something happens to reinvigorate my baby fever or make me feel like there's no reason for us to still be waiting. And I love these weekly check-ins, but I hate coming on and reading the updates from women who really want to try, and are being barred from it for their own reasons that are so much more difficult than mine, and I feel like... not necessarily an "impostor", but just that my problems are so petty compared to some of others. You know?

    Me: 30 | DH: 34 | DSS: 14 | DS: 4
    PG #2, EDD 10/12/2023

  • EkzerrEkzerr member
    @izza2 I'm taking the Bachelor of Nursing Registered Nurse program at a college here and it is a 4 yr program in total, the first three years being classes and practicum from end of August until end of May with June and July off and the last year is 450 hours of practicum. My courses for the first 2 years will be a little more spaced out as I have been taking the recognition of prior learning courses while on the waiting list, which is 5 classes that I'll have taken so now won't have to take them during the regular school year when everyone else is taking them 
  • izza2izza2 member
    Ekzerr said:
    @izza2 I'm taking the Bachelor of Nursing Registered Nurse program at a college here and it is a 4 yr program in total, the first three years being classes and practicum from end of August until end of May with June and July off and the last year is 450 hours of practicum. My courses for the first 2 years will be a little more spaced out as I have been taking the recognition of prior learning courses while on the waiting list, which is 5 classes that I'll have taken so now won't have to take them during the regular school year when everyone else is taking them 
    That makes things easier, then. FX that you get your BFP soon so you don't have to interrupt TTC! And you can have those precious first couple of years with the LO while your classes are spaced out and you're not super busy. :smile:

    Me: 30 | DH: 34 | DSS: 14 | DS: 4
    PG #2, EDD 10/12/2023

  •  Are you benched or TTA? Benched

     What brings you here? Blighted Ovum--D&C on 7/20. 

     How long do you think you'll be here? One cycle--I have my 2 week follow-up with my RE next Wednesday.  I'm hoping everything looks ok following the D&C so we can start a medicated/IUI cycle once I get my period again. 

     How have things been going? For some reason, emotionally, I was much better BEFORE the D&C even though I knew the pregnancy was not viable for weeks before the surgery.  Now, I cry each day over the smallest things and I hate being alone.  I think I hate being alone because that's when I cry the most--when my husband is not here to take my mind off things, or when I'm not at work.  I'm working from home this morning and my husband is at work, so it's been sort of a rough morning.  I know this won't last forever.  I'm looking forward to my RE appointment on Wednesday morning and hoping that everything checks out ok after the D&C.  I'm not sure if the RE will do an ultrasound, but I'm hoping he does one so we can see where I'm at in my current cycle.  I worry I will have a super long cycle because of the PCOS.  I have been taking a pregnancy test every other day and the tests keep getting lighter, so I'm glad my levels are dropping. 

     Any R/R/CS? NA

     GTKY:  What is the worst fashion faux pas you made growing up that makes you cringe/laugh now? (Think- crimped to death hair, skechers platform flip flops, jnco jeans, butterfly clips etc...)

    About me:
    TTC#1: October 2015
    dx: PCOS & MFI
    IUI #1 w/Femara + Ovidrel June 2016 ~ BFP
    July 2016: Blighted Ovum
    IUI #2 w/Femara + Ovidrel September 2016 ~BFN
    IUI #3 w/Femara + Ovidrel October 2016 ~BFN
    IUI #4 w/Femara + Ovidrel November 2016 ~BFN
    IVF with ICSI January 2017 ~BFN
    FET February 2017 ~BFN
    IVF with ICSI March 2017 ~BFP--Twins Due 12/8/17
    Team Blue X 2!
  • EkzerrEkzerr member
    @izza2 thank you!!
  • EkzerrEkzerr member
    edited July 2016
    eta: duplicate post!
  • _______________________ 
     Are you benched or TTA? Benched. 

     What brings you here? Hysterscopy - intercourse restriction 

     How long do you think you'll be here? 1 cycle 

     How have things been going? I'm sad about missing out this cycle but know that it's needed so just chugging along. 

     Any R/R/CS? 

     GTKY:  What is the worst fashion faux pas you made growing up that makes you cringe/laugh now? (Think- crimped to death hair, skechers platform flip flops, jnco jeans, butterfly clips etc...)
    multipe pairs of scrunch socks 
    DH: 34 | Me: 35
    DS1 9/24/13
    DX Diminished Ovarian Reserve, Factor V Leiden Mutation, Secondary Infertility
    MFI (SA #1
    Count 11mill, Motility: 18%, Morphology: 1%)
    MFI (SA #2Count 7 mill, Motility: 18%, Morphology: 1%)
    AMH .328 
    | FSH 13.2 
    Oct. 2016: Clomid + TI
    IVF: ER 3/1/17; 5 retrieved, 3 mature & fertilized
    Results: 2 PGS normal embryos
    Planned on August 2017 transfer
    **TW**
    Natural BFP 4/3/17,Expecting baby boy via RCS 12/7/17

  • @beary67 I'm so sorry you're going through a tough time emotionally now that the D&C is over. It's normal to have those overwhelming feelings. I promise as time goes on it will get easier. The bad days will eventually happen less often. I also struggled with being alone. It was so much easier when DH was around because I felt like I could focus on other things. I wish I had suggestions to help you but honestly other than keeping busy there isn't much that helped me. I'm always here for you if you need to talk  <3
    **Formerly @aliciabhen**
    Me: 26 DH: 24
    Married: November 2015  <3
    TTC#1: January 2016
    BFP: 5/02/16 - MC: 5/27/16
    Computer Hope
  • @Marley629 I'm so sorry you are here. 

    @AliciaGoose as always, you always know the right things to say. Thanks for your kindness. You are absolutely wonderful.  <3
    About me:
    TTC#1: October 2015
    dx: PCOS & MFI
    IUI #1 w/Femara + Ovidrel June 2016 ~ BFP
    July 2016: Blighted Ovum
    IUI #2 w/Femara + Ovidrel September 2016 ~BFN
    IUI #3 w/Femara + Ovidrel October 2016 ~BFN
    IUI #4 w/Femara + Ovidrel November 2016 ~BFN
    IVF with ICSI January 2017 ~BFN
    FET February 2017 ~BFN
    IVF with ICSI March 2017 ~BFP--Twins Due 12/8/17
    Team Blue X 2!
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