Doing the deed/ birth control...

HeartLikeMine3

Anyone been cleared to do the deed and actually feel up to it? DH is patiently waiting I was cleared last week but still not feeling ready. DH is getting a vasectomy next week so I was pumped not to have to get on Birth control but we were informed it takes 3 months to be effective so I'm getting on the mini pill. 

AOliveira11

Havent been cleared yet but i made it exactly 2.5 weeks before we caved and had some boring vanilla sex so not to hurt me. We were both so ready for it and my boobs have been so sensitive....no bad repercussions but i cant wait to do it agaib. As for bc, we used condoms but im going to talk to my doc about going on the pill

splsmama2016

I got cleared last week. We caved 3 days early and it wasn't painful, just a little uncomfortable as it had been almost 3 months. We use condoms, and still will even though I'm on the pill. I hate feeling messy lol. 

AmberLiz99

I should get cleared in two weeks. I will get on the pill and we will use comdoms while we wait for them to work 

rlbrooks84

I'm going to the doctor this afternoon but my husband is nervous because I've still been having some tenderness down there. I think I'm up to it but if my husband is nervous it kind of kills the mood. I'm sure my doctor will clear me but husband is suppose to get a vasectomy but he keeps putting it off so I might have to go on the pill for a while. The only problem is my cycle is only 21 days and the pill jacks with my body and I never know when I'll have my period. My cycle was 28 days until after my first child that's when it switched. Lube is your friend incase you do try to give it a go and a glass of wine.

alileecam

I had my followup appointment, but didn't exactly get cleared--apparently I've got some dryness/scar tissue issues (I am old, and I had tears with both deliveries) and she gave me an estrogen cream to use first, which made me feel like a senior citizen.

DH is getting his vasectomy in August but I am in no rush to do it--nursing and insomnia kills any drive I might have, and on top of the other situation, I am putting off P in V for at least a few more weeks. 

purplefan1

Looking forward to hopefully getting the good to go Friday. Going to stick with condoms because we plan on trying for #2 before too long.

I'm not sure what I'm looking more forward to-getting cleared for sex or getting cleared to submerge myself in water (bath, pool, etc). And getting cleared to really get back in to working out (my run last night felt pretty good but I still worry about uterus/other stuff falling out)

HeartLikeMine3

I will definitely make sure we have lube and wine good idea. It hurt so bad after my first I think that's why I'm dreading it so much. 

HeartLikeMine3

alileecam said:

I had my followup appointment, but didn't exactly get cleared--apparently I've got some dryness/scar tissue issues (I am old, and I had tears with both deliveries) and she gave me an estrogen cream to use first, which made me feel like a senior citizen.

DH is getting his vasectomy in August but I am in no rush to do it--nursing and insomnia kills any drive I might have, and on top of the other situation, I am putting off P in V for at least a few more weeks. 

Bahaha! You made me laugh with the senior citizen comment... I feel the exact same I could care less about doing it the whole time I'm breastfeeding. And if I have free time sleep is always a priority. 

lm45678

I surprisingly feel up for it (will be 4 weeks PP on Thursday) except I can feel that there is still a stitch or two down there so I'm going to wait until my 6 week appointment. There will definitely be lots of wine and lube involved! Although TBH after six weeks it probably won't last very long

DarkCat

Not cleared yet. I'll be 6W PP on 8/07 and I have my PP check up on the 9th. But DH and I have been having outercourse. 

huskypuppy14

I was cleared yesterday. I'm starting the mini pill this week but I told my husband he should buy some condoms too if he wanted anything. 

Anyone have any experience with the mini pill. I was on a combination pill for ten years and loved  it, but I'm nervous about the mini pill since its continuous and you don't get periods. Not that that's a bad thing, but I'd probably be paranoid I was pregnant.

lm45678

DarkCat said:

Not cleared yet. I'll be 6W PP on 8/07 and I have my PP check up on the 9th. But DH and I have been having outercourse. 

Do you mean intercourse or is outer course something new I've never heard of?

adiaz132003

alileecam said:

I had my followup appointment, but didn't exactly get cleared--apparently I've got some dryness/scar tissue issues (I am old, and I had tears with both deliveries) and she gave me an estrogen cream to use first, which made me feel like a senior citizen.

DH is getting his vasectomy in August but I am in no rush to do it--nursing and insomnia kills any drive I might have, and on top of the other situation, I am putting off P in V for at least a few more weeks. 

Ugh they have me on cream too for the dryness and scarring and it suuuuuucks!!!!!!  And I'm not "old".  27 year olds shouldn't need hormone cream! DH and I wanna try outercourse as well but I'm even nervous about that cause A, what if the baby wakes up?  Buzzkill and B I just have no libido.  We'll see

HeartLikeMine3

Can't believe all you girls even feel up to it! I took the mini pill the whole year I breastfed DS not a single complaint.

StayingFocused

I'm only 2.5 weeks pp so got a few before my check up.  I'm getting Mirena put in so we may have to wait a little longer.

DarkCat

laurenm2123 said:

DarkCat said:

Not cleared yet. I'll be 6W PP on 8/07 and I have my PP check up on the 9th. But DH and I have been having outercourse. 

Do you mean intercourse or is outer course something new I've never heard
of?

*Stuck in a box*


It's another term for oral sex and mutual masturbation.

laurendiaz02

I'm 5 weeks PP and definitely ready to have sex. Lol. Unfortunately I had to move my 6 week PP appointment since we're going out of town so now I have to wait until August 10th.  Boo. I guess we will just have to have "outercourse" until then 

26pointrunningfor2

I got cleared yesterday, but given that my pelvic exam hurt, I am now terrified to have sex. I had a 3rd degree tear. 

ashkee05

@huskypuppy14 I'm on the mini pill and I got my period. My dr told me only some don't get it? Idk it's my first time trying it. I just know I got my period two days ago after two weeks into it 

Knottie13257900

I did it as soon as I got cleared at 6 wks. I have a prescription for the mini pill but is it bad that I'm not using it and just relying on breastfeeding for birth control?? I don't want another baby, hubby does...I doubt we will have an "accident", breastfeeding is pretty effective birth control from what I've read. And we don't have that much sex right now anyway...

AmberLiz99

Knottie13257900 said:

I did it as soon as I got cleared at 6 wks. I have a prescription for the mini pill but is it bad that I'm not using it and just relying on breastfeeding for birth control?? I don't want another baby, hubby does...I doubt we will have an "accident", breastfeeding is pretty effective birth control from what I've read. And we don't have that much sex right now anyway...

Ummm... Breastfeeding is not as reliable as you might think. Your cycle could come back at any time, and since you ovulate before a period you wouldn't know your cycle was back until it was potentially too late. I know lots of people who got pregnant while breast feeding. If you really don't want another baby I would use some real birth control. 

purplefan1

Breastfeeding is effective around the same as other contraceptives (98%) but depends on a lot. Exclusively breastfeeding, breastfeeding on demand, not missing any feedings (go out for an evening and leave baby home with bottle and not at least pump), etc. And after 6 months when most babies start some solids and decrease feeding slightly, the efficacy of EBF as birth control decreases. If you are using EBF as your BC make sure to use back up techniques such as fertility tracking and be aware that you can ovulate before you get your period back. Once your period comes back then EBF is not an effective form of BC because that means the hormones that were being suppressed are no longer being suppressed.

Surprises do happen when using EBF as a form of birth control but it can also be used as long as you make sure to keep up with it and not decrease your feedings. I worry a little bit that you say you don't want another baby. Having just had a baby and not wanting another could be a pretty overwhelming "surprise".

arteduc8

I got the all clear last Monday but we haven't done anything yet. I have no desire right now partly due to exhaustion and I'm also afraid it will hurt. My dr pointed out where my tear was and lightly pushed on it stating that's where I would feel the most discomfort and it was unpleasant. Yesterday was our anniversary and poor dh wants to do the deed so bad but I'm just not ready. Maybe I've psyched myself out after reading others' accounts of how painful it can be. On top of that I have no drive. Ugh. 

huskypuppy14

We attempted yesterday, but had to stop because it was stinging. Not sure if it was the condom or the dryness, but I had a c section so I figured it wouldn't be a big deal. Next time we'll use lube.

artlea2013

huskypuppy14 said:

We attempted yesterday, but had to stop because it was stinging. Not sure if it was the condom or the dryness, but I had a c section so I figured it wouldn't be a big deal. Next time we'll use lube.

Probably the dryness combined with the amount of time off. Breastfeeding makes you crazy dry, both because of dehydration and hormones. Lube it up!

I also had a c-section and didn't experience any soreness or pain from the muscles being used, but the stinging feeling I understand. We've only done it once so far (just cleared Friday), so I don't know if it gets better or not

rlbrooks84

It gets better! Don't give up, my husband is more nervous then me. He still doesn't want to try and this is our third baby! Between the exhaustion and the fact I spent the weekend tiling our guest bath I don't have the energy to try and persuade him. But yes lube is your best friend! Oh and wine or a cocktail

Tawny87

You all are amazing getting back in the saddle already, I was literally 11 months pp after my last pregnancy when we did it again for the first time lol. 

adiaz132003

Well almost 7 weeks PP and we did the deed.  A little dry but it didn't hurt.  However, after we were done I noticed a little blood when I cleaned up and the area where I had a lot of sore hurt but that wasn't the source of the bleeding.  Now when I say bleeding I mean like really light.  I'm thinking I'll call the.midwofe and see if she does in fact wanna do that second follow up before we go doing it again.  But I'm proud that I sent through with it cause I was more scared of sex after baby than I was about that first poop. Lol

lm45678

adiaz132003 said:

Well almost 7 weeks PP and we did the deed.  A little dry but it didn't hurt.  However, after we were done I noticed a little blood when I cleaned up and the area where I had a lot of sore hurt but that wasn't the source of the bleeding.  Now when I say bleeding I mean like really light.  I'm thinking I'll call the.midwofe and see if she does in fact wanna do that second follow up before we go doing it again.  But I'm proud that I sent through with it cause I was more scared of sex after baby than I was about that first poop. Lol

Go you! If sex is anything like pooping has been PP, Savannah is gonna be 18 before she gets a sibling!

adiaz132003

laurenm2123 said:

adiaz132003 said:

Well almost 7 weeks PP and we did the deed.  A little dry but it didn't hurt.  However, after we were done I noticed a little blood when I cleaned up and the area where I had a lot of sore hurt but that wasn't the source of the bleeding.  Now when I say bleeding I mean like really light.  I'm thinking I'll call the.midwofe and see if she does in fact wanna do that second follow up before we go doing it again.  But I'm proud that I sent through with it cause I was more scared of sex after baby than I was about that first poop. Lol

Go you! If sex is anything like pooping has been PP, Savannah is gonna be 18 before she gets a sibling!

 HAHAHAHAHA!!! Oddly enough I found that first poop to be enjoyable.  You would think that i would have been terrified considering the last time I had the urge to poop, a baby was coming out instead.  That's how he was almost born in our bathroom.  

adiaz132003

So while doing the deed, it's not painful at all but after we are done I get pretty sore all over down there and cleaning up there is s tinge of pink.  We go really slow still and use lots of lube cause I'm like a desert.  I still get soreness down there at random times so I wonder of I should go see the midwives for another follow up. Thoughts?

lm45678

adiaz132003 said:

So while doing the deed, it's not painful at all but after we are done I get pretty sore all over down there and cleaning up there is s tinge of pink.  We go really slow still and use lots of lube cause I'm like a desert.  I still get soreness down there at random times so I wonder of I should go see the midwives for another follow up. Thoughts?

I would think that this is pretty normal honestly. How many weeks PP are you? 9? It can never hurt to call the doctor, but unfortunately I think some pain is normal for awhile when you think of the trauma our poor vagubas went through!

adiaz132003

laurenm2123 said:

adiaz132003 said:

So while doing the deed, it's not painful at all but after we are done I get pretty sore all over down there and cleaning up there is s tinge of pink.  We go really slow still and use lots of lube cause I'm like a desert.  I still get soreness down there at random times so I wonder of I should go see the midwives for another follow up. Thoughts?

I would think that this is pretty normal honestly. How many weeks PP are you? 9? It can never hurt to call the doctor, but unfortunately I think some pain is normal for awhile when you think of the trauma our poor vagubas went through!

.... Vagubas.... That's...  Amazing!! Lol yes almost 9weeks pp

lm45678

adiaz132003 said:

laurenm2123 said:

adiaz132003 said:

So while doing the deed, it's not painful at all but after we are done I get pretty sore all over down there and cleaning up there is s tinge of pink.  We go really slow still and use lots of lube cause I'm like a desert.  I still get soreness down there at random times so I wonder of I should go see the midwives for another follow up. Thoughts?

I would think that this is pretty normal honestly. How many weeks PP are you? 9? It can never hurt to call the doctor, but unfortunately I think some pain is normal for awhile when you think of the trauma our poor vagubas went through!

.... Vagubas.... That's...  Amazing!! Lol yes almost 9weeks pp

Hahaha I guess auto correct doesn't like the word vagina!

BabyL52716

10 weekd pp had a c-section.  No sex drive what so ever. Boob touching is are off limits and just not sexy when your tatas are sore from being hooked up to a pump every 3hrs. Plus there's nothing sexy about leaking boobs in my opinion. Done the deed twice and felt like glass and that's without (ehhem) going in hardly at all. Plus having your lo in the back of your mind. Woundering when they will wake up or make a noise. 
I wish I was never cleared to have sex again lol...
Am I the only one? Or am I weird

cy&damonsmommy

Honestly the hubby and I have been doing it since 2 weeks pp and I want it more than he does. He's turning me down lol. I just got my birth control put in today. Does anyone have experience with the implanon? 

laurendiaz02

Did the deed Just over 8 weeks PP. Felt totally fine. Hubby was just annoyed because he had to wear a condom. 

alileecam

I am sitting in the urologist office waiting room right now while DH gets a vasectomy! We will have to use backup (condoms) for 90+ days but I have no drive anyway--that is our birth control right now. Hats off to all you brave ladies who are already back on the horse (so to speak...).

vintagevix2016

We got the "go-ahead" at my 6wk appt but haven't done it yet because LIFE. We keep saying that we'll have a little sexy time when he is napping but then the naps come and we're too tired. One day we spent naptime building a new grill! It almost feels like we're avoid it, despite saying to each other that we want to do it. I'm 8wk4d now...hope we can get our shit together and get down and dirty soon!

adiaz132003

We've done the deed twice and other stuff once since Preston was born.  Lol we are just too tired and have too much to do.  The only time we have energy is during the day but his naps are short so we never want to risk being interrupted. Plus like vintage said, "life"