2nd Baby Fever *MC mentioned*

zizzabell523

Quick Intro: I'm a full-time working mom, had a MC in 2013, rainbow DD was born Nov 2014. I've been on anti-depressants for about a month now (my GYN said the ones I'm taking are safe to take while pregnant and BF) and while it's helping me deal with my depression, it's also got me concerned about if I could handle another MC. My mom passed away from breast cancer 12 years ago and the grief got buried pretty deep and was starting to affect me in odd ways. In some of my counseling, I've realized that the last time I was truly happy was while I was pregnant, so that's got my baby fever up!

My rainbow DD is 1.5 now. We always knew we wanted 2, maybe 3, children, so we've starting considering a time frame to add a sibling to our family. I know every family and every child is different, and that you can't really "plan" when to have a baby with 100% accuracy, but, we're considering trying this coming Spring, which will put DD turning 3 while I'll be pregnant. Does anyone have children with this age gap? What are the ups and downs to look forward to? Should we try to encourage (not force) potty training before anything happens? I know the entire dynamic of taking care of 2 kids is totally different from welcoming 1 into the world, I just don't have any clue about what to expect! (Other than much less sleep than the first time around.)

Any advice, tips, and encouragement is welcome!

casandkls

justposted a new discussion, similar topic. What does your husband think? I think it should be a mutual decision to bring another kid into the world. MC rates are high and there's a real possibility that could happen again. I also don't know if I'd want to handle that again but I also want a sibling for my son and don't want them too far apart in age. My son is 2, we've been TTC for about 6 months with no luck (some fertility issues) but now I'm rethinking my decision. So sorry about your mom but glad you're in counseling, mental health is important. But, do you just want to be pregnant again or do you truly want another child? I loved being pregnant too, but the 1st 3 months of babies' life was a total blur!

zizzabell523

Thank you for your reply @casandkls ! I hate to hear about your TTC issues.

DH has been ready for #2 just a few weeks after DD was born haha.

My Dr. said that there's always a 1 in 10 chance that you'll have a miscarriage for unknown reasons, and that actually most very early MC's go unnoticed because we think it's our period. It gave me some comfort to know that there's a 99% chance I did nothing wrong.

Part of me really wants to be pregnant again, to know that all I have to do to care for my child is eat. The first month or two was a blur for me as well, and having a toddler in the mix could make this next baby's first couple months an even blurrier memory. It'll be hard for sure caring for 2 instead of one, but I can't envision my life with only one child. At the same time, by biological clock is ticking (hello 30!!) so we can't wait too terribly long to avoid possible complications!