Sister stealing the show — The Bump
2nd Trimester

Sister stealing the show


I'm 25 wks 4 days pregnant. Well, recently I found out my sister is also pregnant. She is 16 wks and some days. I'm  mad because my sister is supposed to host my baby shower which is July 9th and she might steal the spotlight. I didn't congratulate her.  I just said this is supposed to be my moment. For goodness  sakes she has an 1 1/2 year old who isn't potty trained. He didn't have no time to be the baby. I'm I being selfish and mean?
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Re: Sister stealing the show

  • Selfish doesn't even begins to sum it up.....wow. Try being happy for her that competitive spirit against your own sister is beyond mean. Celebrate with her.....the world doesn't revolve around you. YouR jealousy issue is going to ruin your relationship, maybe her other child has challenges, instead of bashing her kid on top of it, try helping. 
  • Yes. The answer is yes. You are being selfish and mean. Just because you are pregnant does not mean that others around you are not allowed to conceive. You SHOULD be happy for your sister. Also, who cares if she steals the spotlight at your shower? Are you going to have her keep her pregnancy a secret at your shower so no one can congratulate her? My SIL is due 8 weeks after me and I'm ecstatic that we'll have boys so close in age and she's been an invaluable resource since this is my first and it's nice to have someone so close that you can relate to and experience this with. AND - she threw my baby shower and it was great. You should be happy she's pregnant and hope everything is good and healthy and be thankful that she is throwing you a baby shower - she doesn't have to. Also, my SIL has a 3 yr old that is just now potty training, so what's your point about that?

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  • Goodness this cannot be real! You need to congratulate your sister she is allowed to live her life and honestly her two will be very common age gap between them. So no she isn't trying to steal
    the spotlight. She is even going to host a shower for you while pregnant and that is some serious love right there. You need to adjust your perception now 

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  • This seems awfully MUD-y

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  • I think it's fantastic that your kids will be so close in age. Perhaps they can be friends!

    That age gap between kids is totally normal too.

    It's fine to feel jealous but posting about it on the internet in a public forum is not the smartest way to handle that jealousy. 
    ChaoticWolf
  • juliehollz13juliehollz13
    500 Love Its 500 Comments First Anniversary First Answer
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    edited June 2016
    Playing the devils advocate.....OP, idk your situation or your relationship with your sister but I know some family relationships can be complicated. My SIL's are incredibly selfish people, and always steal the spotlight no matter what the occasion is, they find a way to make it ALL about them. For example, during my wedding they invited a bunch of THEIR friends - some of whom I never even met - including some of my DH's EX GIRLFRIENDS! WTF?!?!?!??! So I get your angst. But holding a grudge or being pissy just makes YOU look like the bad guy. Congratulate her, thank her for throwing you a baby shower, enjoy YOUR gifts and if she does make it all about herself just ignore it and schedule a spa day with your girlfriends later, get mani/pedi's, have lunch and vent about it with them. 
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    mc2002em01092ChaoticWolf
  • Congratulate her, I'd imagine if she's throwing you a shower that you guys normally get along. . I really enjoyed being pregnant at the same time as my sister, and it's really nice to be able to talk to someone going through the same stages. I recently found out my cousin is pregnant with her first, and I'm excited to have another family member to share with, and have a buddy for my kids at family events.
    ChaoticWolf
  • I think it's fantastic that your kids will be so close in age. Perhaps they can be friends!

    That age gap between kids is totally normal too.

    It's fine to feel jealous but posting about it on the internet in a public forum is not the smartest way to handle that jealousy. 

    I had a cousin who was two months to the day older than me. We were always very close. He was one of my BFFs. 
    ChaoticWolf
  • kyraaDkyraaD
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    these responses are the best!!
    tripledaggerWed95976ChaoticWolf
  • AlygohomeAlygohome
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary 5 Answers
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    edited June 2016

    **Removed for TOU violation**

    fiscally3BecauseBabyIamAPug
  • I get feeling like you won't be "the star of the show" but that is no way to act. she is your sister. so what if she has another baby? you are being entirely selfish. you are allowed to have feelings but that was very rude of you to act like a 14 year old girl. apologize.
    ChaoticWolf
  • Playing the devils advocate.....OP, idk your situation or your relationship with your sister but I know some family relationships can be complicated. My SIL's are incredibly selfish people, and always steal the spotlight no matter what the occasion is, they find a way to make it ALL about them. For example, during my wedding they invited a bunch of THEIR friends - some of whom I never even met - including some of my DH's EX GIRLFRIENDS! WTF?!?!?!??! So I get your angst. But holding a grudge or being pissy just makes YOU look like the bad guy. Congratulate her, thank her for throwing you a baby shower, enjoy YOUR gifts and if she does make it all about herself just ignore it and schedule a spa day with your girlfriends later, get mani/pedi's, have lunch and vent about it with them. 
    Good tips!


    ChaoticWolf
  • I'm so late to this thread and couldn't agree more with what everyone else has already said. I'm just imagining what's going to happen when it's the sister's time to have a baby shower--is OP going to throw it for her? How far along will OP be and is she not going to "steal the show" from her sister? It goes both ways.
    Me: 33 / OH: 36
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    ChaoticWolf
  • I'm sorry but WHAT? I don't have a sister bit my cousin who is like my sister got pregnant 8 weeks exactly after me. Our 7 year old are best friends just like her and I were maybe you should shut your hole say sorry and realize you are crazy as he'll to think she stole anything from you!

    Also boys are NOT easy to potty train they are little pissed machine's I hope you have a son and see just how hard it is. Enjoy the random pissed puddles all over the place! 
    ChaoticWolf
  • So I've been on the receiving end of this situation and let me tell you that it hurts.  My SIL and I are very close, and she knew we were having a hard time conceiving.  She had just been married a few weeks and was starting to try with her new husband (mind you I had been trying since before they even started dating).  When we told everyone we were pregnant at Thanksgiving, she stormed out of the house.  She apologized, and she became pregnant four weeks later.  Could I have been bitter?  I guess but what's the point.  She apologized, and I accepted it.  We dropped it.  Now our daughters are 5 years old and the very best of friends.  My daughter always talks about how much she loves her cousin, and my SIL and I became best friends.  Moral of the story, this is a blessing that your children will be so close in age and you have family. Enjoy having someone to share this experience with.  
    ChaoticWolfpurplecma
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