STM check in

mollie2383

just checking in with my fellow new STMs.  How's it going for you so far?  Struggles?  Suggestions from veteran STMs?

I'm definitely having a hard time giving up the time with DD (2.5 years old).  I was finally able to sit with her and give her a long bath and do our old bedtime routine tonight.  She's been a trooper and loves her baby brother-but i feel bad for how much her world has changed.  

Rawa1416

mollie2383 said:

just checking in with my fellow new STMs.  How's it going for you so far?  Struggles?  Suggestions from veteran STMs?

I'm definitely having a hard time giving up the time with DD (2.5 years old).  I was finally able to sit with her and give her a long bath and do our old bedtime routine tonight.  She's been a trooper and loves her baby brother-but i feel bad for how much her world has changed.  

Yes to all of this. I think I've cried at least once per day about not being able to do things with dd. Yesterday she ran into the table and all I wanted to do was pick her up. I cried since I just had a cs and can't pick her up for another 3 weeks. 

xc1148

I am not due for 3 weeks but am dreading having to split my time as well. It's so weird to think about, but it has helped me to realize pretty much everyone goes through this! Most people have 2, if not 3, kids, and everything always works out!

Tawny87

One of my 2 1/2 yr old twins has accepted new baby amazingly, the other, while excited about him is regressing and showing lots of nervous habits such as hair chewing. This has been compounded by the fact that my hubby had to go out of town this week : (.

mollie2383

Tawny87 said:

One of my 2 1/2 yr old twins has accepted new baby amazingly, the other, while excited about him is regressing and showing lots of nervous habits such as hair chewing. This has been compounded by the fact that my hubby had to go out of town this week : (.

Oh man! I can't imagine twins, new baby and having your DH out of town!  DD has been going back and forth from wanting to be a big girl and regressing. She all of a sudden wants to potty train one day and be on the changing table (which she has been too tall for for at least 6 months) the next. We are having a lot of meltdowns around here (mom and dad included)

Tawny87

I had wanted to potty train before new baby but that never happened and secretly the lazy part of me is happy they are still in diapers lol. I have been staying at my parents while he is gone which has helped immensely.

etr152517

Oh boy. The transition to 2 is tough! DS1 was way more interested then I thought he would be and found that he would try to pick up DS2 or try to sit on his lap when he was laying down constantly. It wasn't something that ever occurred to me! For the first 2 weeks, I've had to keep 1 kid with me at all times to avoid any issues. Luckily, DS1 is slowly losing interest and is becoming a little more gently. It was a stressful few weeks though. And the terrible 2 tantrums are also in full force so that's not fun. 

@Tawny87
i was also toying with the idea of potty training before baby but never did. Now DS1 has started telling us "icky" when he has a dirty diaper so I don't think I can put it off any more. I think he's ready. And I don't know the first thing about it! I kinda liked the idea of diapers for both at the moment as well. 

gdjoken

Yes to all this! I love snuggling and caring for my son so much, but I have this nagging feeling that I'm betraying my daughter and I miss my time with her a little bit. It's a relief to know I'm not the only one in this boat. Fortunately my daughter is doing really well and loving on her baby brother for the most part, but it certainly is hard sometimes.