I need support....

mmmynyx

Today I found out my husband got another girl pregnant. When he knew I knew he tried killing himself (and me) and I called the cops on him. I'll be leaving the house before his 3 day hold is up with my baby girl and with a few things. I am so hurt. I just can't believe this is happening to me. 
Please send my daughter and I good vibes...she saw things that no little baby ever should...

AmoLovesAud

OMG, I'm so sorry the two of you are going through this.  I hope you find a safe place to stay.  You'll both be in my thoughts and prayers.

DogLoverX3

Praying. I'm so sorry.

doodleoodle

Oh my goodness. My heart is just breaking for you. I am so sorry. I will be praying for everyone involved. 

sacrazy

Oh my goodness, that is terrible and I'm so sorry you and your little one had to go through that. I hope you have a safe place to go. Please know you are in my thoughts.

snowflake143

I wish there was something I could say to help, or at least make you feel better. At least you have your daughter to give you joy, and get you through this. Treasure her and take it day by day.

Teenaray

Sending positive energy to you and your sweet little princess. May your ancestors, your guides, and the elemental forces be by your sides and guide you both through this. May God continue to show you his love and protection.

be safe!

Ceridwen77

Very sad to hear about this situation. Definitely get yourself and your daughter to a safe place. How can he get out after 3 days if he tried to kill you? Omg that is so not right. Can you get a restraining order?

AmoLovesAud

Ceridwen77 said:

Very sad to hear about this situation. Definitely get yourself and your daughter to a safe place. How can he get out after 3 days if he tried to kill you? Omg that is so not right. Can you get a restraining order?

I'm going to guess he's in a psych ward for the mandatory 72 hour evaluation for attempted suicide.  He'll only stay longer if he checks himself in volunterily, or if the doctor(s) evaluating him determine that he is a danger to himself and/or others and check him in by force (he could argue it was a moment of passion (not the good kind, obviously, passionatly angry) and if his psych eval checks out, he's good to go).  He won't be in jail for alleged attempted murder this quickly, he has to go to court first and be convicted.  Also restraining orders take months, lots of paperwork, and lots of documented incidents by the police showing his behavior.

CheeseSticksfor4

Praying for you and your sweet girl

Peanut1128

I am so sorry that you are going through this! I pray that you have a safe place to go and friends or family who you can lean on. You are a very strong woman to walk away and your daughter is lucky to have you.

nycmommy13

Lots of prayers. I hope there's no fight in you being able to get sole custody.

Escheffler34

Praying for you and your lovely daughter. 

queenwog

AmoLovesAud said:

Ceridwen77 said:

Very sad to hear about this situation. Definitely get yourself and your daughter to a safe place. How can he get out after 3 days if he tried to kill you? Omg that is so not right. Can you get a restraining order?

 Also restraining orders take months, lots of paperwork, and lots of documented incidents by the police showing his behavior.

Not here they don't. All you have to do here is go down to the courthouse and file something and if it involves physical safety it's effective pretty much immediately and the defendent/respondent has to dispute it. My husband's ex girlfriend has filed quite a few restraining orders on false claims and they were defective immediately. No proof needed.

Ceridwen77

queenwog said:

AmoLovesAud said:

Ceridwen77 said:

Very sad to hear about this situation. Definitely get yourself and your daughter to a safe place. How can he get out after 3 days if he tried to kill you? Omg that is so not right. Can you get a restraining order?

 Also restraining orders take months, lots of paperwork, and lots of documented incidents by the police showing his behavior.

Not here they don't. All you have to do here is go down to the courthouse and file something and if it involves physical safety it's effective pretty much immediately and the defendent/respondent has to dispute it. My husband's ex girlfriend has filed quite a few restraining orders on false claims and they were defective immediately. No proof needed.

This seems more logical but maybe it's just me.

but regardless, @mmmynyx how is everything going?

gipfish

Praying for you and your LO.

MargaretC5

I am so sorry.  I hope you and your little girl have somewhere safe to go.

AmoLovesAud

@queenwog must depend on the state, then.  My mom wanted to get a restraining order against an ex-BF, and my uncle, chief of police in the county, said it'd be a pain and a half, even with several documented reports of him physically abusing her.

MoonUnitNugget

Stay strong!! Prayers!

lyankowi

Thinking of you @mmmynyx prayers being sent if you need another single mom to talk to I'm here WAY different circumstances but I'm here if you need anyone.

mmmynyx

UPDATE: He's getting the help he needs thankfully. He's been begging me to stay. It's a long complicated story with what all happened before that night. He'd been depressed, drinking, and overall not himself. What he did was a betrayal beyond belief. I know I'll get extreme hate for this but I decided to stay. He was put on medication and within a week there was some change. Now that he's out he was put on an MPO (Military Protective Order). We can't see each other for 30 days.
I'm okay. And so is Eris. He never really directed his breakdown towards me but when I had tried stopping him from cutting himself he pointed the knife to me to get me to stay away. It was a scary ordeal.
I feel stupid for staying. But I just can't...

kdoak2015

mmmynyx said:

UPDATE: He's getting the help he needs thankfully. He's been begging me to stay. It's a long complicated story with what all happened before that night. He'd been depressed, drinking, and overall not himself. What he did was a betrayal beyond belief. I know I'll get extreme hate for this but I decided to stay. He was put on medication and within a week there was some change. Now that he's out he was put on an MPO (Military Protective Order). We can't see each other for 30 days.
I'm okay. And so is Eris. He never really directed his breakdown towards me but when I had tried stopping him from cutting himself he pointed the knife to me to get me to stay away. It was a scary ordeal.
I feel stupid for staying. But I just can't...

No judgement just do what is right for your baby and family. Sounds like he may have some PTSD?? Was he deployed. If so I feel for you and kind of understand where his heads at. When our friend came back from Iraq I could see a huge different and it was sad and scary. We went out to the bars(before DD was born) and he was having some serious PTSD. He was trying to fight people and just seemed messed up. Very scary stuff. Glad he's getting the help he needs. 

snowflake143

No hate, you're the only one who knows the situation and you're making your decisions based on tons of info we'll never have and I'm sure you aren't taking decisions like this lightly at all. I really hope things get better for you. I guess sometimes things have to fall apart completely so they can be built into what they should be. I hope things start looking up for you! 

Unica1302+

No judgement here just be careful. And always ask yourself if you were a friend on the outside what would your advice be. Read up on warning signs and get a support network  (friends,professionals, family, etc.). Remember to be safe always and that baby girl may not have clear memories of this but she is conscious and it will affect her. 

VexedMommy

No hate here.  I've been in a similar situation and chose to stay.  It did not get better in my case, it does not in most cases.  Eventually I left.  My suggestion is to put together an escape plan.  You may never need it and I hope you don't, but if you do it could literally save your life.  Put aside enough money for a security deposit on an apartment, or a ticket to visit family for a while if things go sideways.  Keep it in a bank account that is in your name only.  Research custody and the legal protections afforded to you in regards to your daughter.  I'd also suggest taking advantage of your local counseling services.  This is a huge betrayal of your trust and working through it can be helped by talking to a neutral third party who will not judge and who will not tell your secrets.   

mmmynyx

UPDATE 2: He's home now and we moved into a new place. It's a beg step for change for our life. He's planning on buying me a new bed too which is good. He's been a really great dad and husband. I'm hoping that it only improves more and more.
We're both seeking help and he's been really honest with me even if he knows it'll upset me. Life has been mellow lately. I appreciate the love and support from all of you and my little family.
Our daughter was very happy to see her father after 30 days. She couldn't stop smiling or staring at him.
I'm hoping for the best but expecting the worst....