People that don't have kids.....

WBORDERS

sometimes suck!! 


A friend gave me shit today because LO had a scream fest in Target today and I didn't immediately drop everything and just leave. Sorry, but it's a damned feat to leave the house with a baby at this point and I needed those groceries so fuuuuhhh you!!

Anyone else want to scream at the advice & lectures from ppl that don't have kids? 

cmjenkies

My favorite is when pregnant FTMs swear up and down they won't do this, that, or the other.. and I just sit back and think 'just wait.' There's no reason to try and be a sanctimommy before your LO is even here.

JayeSkylar

I was one of those non kid having judgy people and me and bf have an agreement if groceries are needed he either goes alone or we go together and if Roo starts getting really upset then I will be the one to leave the store and or go to the bathroom for change and comfort. But so far no one without kids have tried to give me any advice. The most annoying advice I keep getting is sleep when he sleeps and if it was that easy I would. But my body clock is ducked and five hours is enough to keep me awake even if I'm still really tired my body will not sleep anymore if awoken. That and the judgy people who kept asking me why we weren't BFing. Just shush and let me care for my kid as I see fit.

loveymay

All my friends and cousins had kids young, Im pretty much the last one to start (Im 30), so I havent had any non kid people try to give advice. .....however,  I was one of those people who said "when I have kids, I will do/wont do etc..." One thing I remember telling myself is that I wouldn't be one of those moms who doesnt shower or put on makeup, that it cant be that difficult to shower everyday and spruce myself up some.....hahahaha, if only my unshowered, greasy haired bare faced and unbrushed teethed self could go back in time, I would slap the lipstick right off my face and say this is your future:

momofmanyinthemitten

loveymay said:

All my friends and cousins had kids young, Im pretty much the last one to start (Im 30), so I havent had any non kid people try to give advice. .....however,  I was one of those people who said "when I have kids, I will do/wont do etc..." One thing I remember telling myself is that I wouldn't be one of those moms who doesnt shower or put on makeup, that it cant be that difficult to shower everyday and spruce myself up some.....hahahaha, if only my unshowered, greasy haired bare faced and unbrushed teethed self could go back in time, I would slap the lipstick right off my face and say this is your future:

Funny how showering has gotten easier to accomplish with each baby. I'm showered by 8:30am daily with #4. It was sometimes 1pm with #1.

korpatch

What about people who have kids but it has been a while? If one more person tells me that my son needs a pacifier, I don't know what I'll do. 
He had a tongue tie released about two weeks ago and is just finally starting to know how to suck right. I went to the lactation consultant today and she said that his tongue and jaw get fatigued after only one side of a feeding. If he was to suck on a pacifier, he'd be so tired by the time it came to feed, he wouldn't even be able to and I'd be pinched even worse.
Pacifiers are the last things he needs and I, his mother, should know!

WBORDERS

People with kids that are older may even be worse. I have a few family members that have really stuck by old advice that isn't relevant anymore and I have to ignore them a lot when they try to explain how they did it "in their day". 

wildtot

WBORDERS said:

People with kids that are older may even be worse. I have a few family members that have really stuck by old advice that isn't relevant anymore and I have to ignore them a lot when they try to explain how they did it "in their day". 

Omg yes this is my mom all the way! Super annoying. 

Ljljljl

My dad flipped tf out on me because I wouldn't let him give my two week old a bottle full of water... He said babies have always drank water in past years..... Yes, dad. They have. The infant mortality rate has also been higher in the past years.

Ready4theParty

cmjenkies said:

My favorite is when pregnant FTMs swear up and down they won't do this, that, or the other.. and I just sit back and think 'just wait.' There's no reason to try and be a sanctimommy before your LO is even here.

I love this.  My Sil is trying to be "modern" and swears she will never do time out and feeds her 9 month old organic food.  To each their own, but there are days we struggle to get DD1 to eat so if the only thing she will eat is chips, I don't care.  Sometimes, the time out is more for my sanity than it is for discipline.

Brandi81012

Oh my gosh... I couldn't agree more @Ready4theParty

Missingchampagne

I remember a few occasions pre-child when I was waiting for a parking spot and it happened to be a woman with a stroller pulling out. I would sit there yelling in my car "JESUS HOW HARD CAN IT BE B!$TCH?! HURRY IT UP! IT'S BEEN 20 MINUTES!"

Now I'm realizing the baby is not a stationary object. He is flailing about, the car can't get too hot, diaper bag needs to get packed in, lots of strapping and unstrapping is involved, and I feel bad for the lack of patience.

wildtot

Gotta vent but this goes to my own mom who thinks she's a medical expert after having 2 kids. Stop tell me how it was ok back in the day and surprised why the doc hasn't recommended giving water and other things to a 4 wk old. How my child is too little to be on meds for reflux and how I shouldn't be changing my diet. Way to add to my stress! I'm just trying the best I can to give LO some relief. Please show your concern and support instead of your judgement and lack of confidence in my ways. Medical opinions have changed in the past 28 years.

brie_and_almonds

Knottie2891384 said:

Gotta vent but this goes to my own mom who thinks she's a medical expert after having 2 kids. Stop tell me how it was ok back in the day and surprised why the doc hasn't recommended giving water and other things to a 4 wk old. How my child is too little to be on meds for reflux and how I shouldn't be changing my diet. Way to add to my stress! I'm just trying the best I can to give LO some relief. Please show your concern and support instead of your judgement and lack of confidence in my ways. Medical opinions have changed in the past 28 years.

Ugh. My mom is the same way. She's especially convinced that baby needs a blanket in the crib and a coat in the carseat. She also thinks that any food recommendation is irrelevant since the opinion on peanut introduction/exposure has changed since my nephew was a baby and he now refuses to try peanut butter (which is apparently worse than if he had gone into anaphylaxis as a baby, which was what the fear was when he was an infant).

I keep trying to tell her we just do the best we can with the current medical advice to keep our kids healthy and safe, but when the current medical advice clashes with what she thinks it should be, there's no reasoning with her. Thankfully she has never tried to ignore me and actually do something she knows I don't approve of, but we keep having these same conversations/arguments over and over and over again. 

Thankfully my MIL, who will be watching R when I go back to work, has no issues following current medical advice, and even if she thinks L should be forward-facing at 3 due to her legs being bent when she sits in the car (the horror!), she doesn't constantly harp on it. 

wildtot

@brenlo42 yup exactly my situation with both moms. My mom will do what I ask but in a bad judgmental mood.

JadaBlue

I don’t know how many times my mother has repeated to people in front of me how hysterically funny/crazy it is I asked her to cut grapes in half before giving them to my then 11 month old... 

acastl24

Knottie2891384 said:

WBORDERS said:

People with kids that are older may even be worse. I have a few family members that have really stuck by old advice that isn't relevant anymore and I have to ignore them a lot when they try to explain how they did it "in their day". 

Omg yes this is my mom all the way! Super annoying. 

Lurking from Dec 15
Yes! My dad swears he knows everything and I should follow his advice to the T. No, Dad. Your last experience with babies was 24 years ago. Literally two and a half decades. Sit down, shut up, CHILL OUT, and let me raise my child.

sarahufl

loveymay said:

All my friends and cousins had kids young, Im pretty much the last one to start (Im 30), so I havent had any non kid people try to give advice. .....however,  I was one of those people who said "when I have kids, I will do/wont do etc..." One thing I remember telling myself is that I wouldn't be one of those moms who doesnt shower or put on makeup, that it cant be that difficult to shower everyday and spruce myself up some.....hahahaha, if only my unshowered, greasy haired bare faced and unbrushed teethed self could go back in time, I would slap the lipstick right off my face and say this is your future:

I never understood why people say new moms don't have time to brush their teeth. I mean....that is really basic hygiene that takes, like, 2 minutes....

redselig

sarahufl said: I never understood why people say new moms don't have time to brush their teeth. I mean....that is really basic hygiene that takes, like, 2 minutes....

I definitely missed a tooth brushing session the first two weeks PP. For me it wasn't about the time; I would just forget. I forgot a lot of other things too like peeing and feeding myself.  

sarahufl

redselig said:

sarahufl said: I never understood why people say new moms don't have time to brush their teeth. I mean....that is really basic hygiene that takes, like, 2 minutes....

I definitely missed a tooth brushing session the first two weeks PP. For me it wasn't about the time; I would just forget. I forgot a lot of other things too like peeing and feeding myself.  

I literally have to schedule meals. I have no appetite and all of a sudden, it's late afternoon and I forgot to eat...