Monday Bitchfest - Page 2 — The Bump
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Monday Bitchfest

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Re: Monday Bitchfest

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  • @DoctorDonna , @housewifehobbyist  @mylove071407  Thanks so much for the thoughts & well wishes.  Much appreciated.

    Guys.  Should I add a trigger warning to my siggy?  I see you have one @MommyForTheFirstTime  I feel like triggers are overly used for loss.  It's a reality of TTC.  I understand if I was posting in a BMB, but for TTC it just seems a bit like overkill.  It's my history and I'm not ashamed of it, but I also don't want to be insensitive either.

    Thoughts welcome!
    ****TW****

    Me: 39 DH: 40
    Married: 12/6/2014

    BFP#1: 1/20/15      MC: 2/14/15
    BFP#2: 10/28/15    MC: 11/24/15
    BFP#3:  3/20/16     MC: 4/26/16
    BFP#4:  7/15/16     DD: 3/18/17
    BFP#5:  5/1/18     EDD: 1/12/19
    Babysizer Geeky Pregnancy Tracker


  • @loveinak couldn't have said it any better.  I would have lost my shit too.
    ****TW****

    Me: 39 DH: 40
    Married: 12/6/2014

    BFP#1: 1/20/15      MC: 2/14/15
    BFP#2: 10/28/15    MC: 11/24/15
    BFP#3:  3/20/16     MC: 4/26/16
    BFP#4:  7/15/16     DD: 3/18/17
    BFP#5:  5/1/18     EDD: 1/12/19
    Babysizer Geeky Pregnancy Tracker


    beary67loveinak
  • MrsBinPA said:
    @DoctorDonna , @housewifehobbyist  @mylove071407  Thanks so much for the thoughts & well wishes.  Much appreciated.

    Guys.  Should I add a trigger warning to my siggy?  I see you have one @MommyForTheFirstTime  I feel like triggers are overly used for loss.  It's a reality of TTC.  I understand if I was posting in a BMB, but for TTC it just seems a bit like overkill.  It's my history and I'm not ashamed of it, but I also don't want to be insensitive either.

    Thoughts welcome!
    I only did because I saw so many others have. I agree with you, if it were up to me, I would never use a TW because it doesn't bother me and it's part of the territory. Even for BFP, I get happy not sad. I dunno. I wish there was just a broad, "TW not needed here" for the group
    TTC #1 since September 2014
    Diagnoses: RPL, Endometriosis, MFI (count, morph, DNI, DNAS, multiple bilateral subclinical varicoceles), low progesterone
    Check out my Infertility blog 
    Check out my Infertility Instagram

    Loss History (TW):
    BFP: 3 May 2015, loss confirmed 4 June 2015
    BFP: 15 August 2015, loss confirmed 23 August 2015
    BFP: 16 November 2015, loss confirmed 22 November 2015
    BFP: 18 July 2016, loss confirmed same day
    BFP: 04 March 2018, loss confirmed 23 March 2018
    BFP: 12 June 2018, TWINS; D&C 06 July 2018
    TTC History (TW):
    3 losses in 2015
    Met with OBGYN in January 2016
    Me: all clear, H: OAT
    November 2016: HSG = All Clear!
    January 2017: H tested again,  High DNA fragmentation and stainability
    February 2017: Clomid + TI + Progesterone = BFN
    March 2017: Clomid + HCG + IUI + Progesterone = SA/wash: zero count on attempt #1, <1,000 on attempt #2= BFN
    Varicocele Embolization- 5 May 17
    December 2017 SA: Zero improvement after embolization
    January IVF- 25 retrieved, 11 mature, 8 fertilized, 3 frozen day fives (3AA, 3AA, 3AA), 1 frozen day 6 (5BB), 1 frozen day 7 (3CC)
    Three PGS normal (3AA, 3AA, 5BB), one inconclusive (3AA)
    FET #1: 27 February 2018, 3AA & 5BB, one stuck! BFP 04 March 2018.... Loss confirmed 23 March 2018
    May 2018: SHG/SIS = all clear "beautiful uterus"
    FET #2: 04 June 2018, 3AA PGS normal embryo, 3AA PGS hatching inconclusive embryo. 
    BFP: 12 June 2018, EDD 20 February 2019
    Ultrasound, 25 June 2018: There are two
    Lost Baby A 02 July 2018
    Baby B not growing, D&C 06 July 2018
    Laparoscopy, hysteroscopy, chromotubation: 23 July 2018: blocked right tube, heavily inflamed, covered in endo. Removed right tube. Removed more endo from uterus, tubes, ovaries. Endo remains on bladder and bowel. 
    Next Up:
    TTC Naturally, possibly IUIs for remainder of 2018. 
    ER#2 ~Jan 2019
            

  • @loveinak - They both like totally threw me off. I just stood there both times with my mouth wide open. I would have reacted if I had seen it coming but I just stood there appalled. I still can't even fathom what would posses someone to say these things. Especially that second one. Who says "God thinks you'll be a bad mom?" What the heck. I mean. What the actual heck?
    TTC #1 since September 2014
    Diagnoses: RPL, Endometriosis, MFI (count, morph, DNI, DNAS, multiple bilateral subclinical varicoceles), low progesterone
    Check out my Infertility blog 
    Check out my Infertility Instagram

    Loss History (TW):
    BFP: 3 May 2015, loss confirmed 4 June 2015
    BFP: 15 August 2015, loss confirmed 23 August 2015
    BFP: 16 November 2015, loss confirmed 22 November 2015
    BFP: 18 July 2016, loss confirmed same day
    BFP: 04 March 2018, loss confirmed 23 March 2018
    BFP: 12 June 2018, TWINS; D&C 06 July 2018
    TTC History (TW):
    3 losses in 2015
    Met with OBGYN in January 2016
    Me: all clear, H: OAT
    November 2016: HSG = All Clear!
    January 2017: H tested again,  High DNA fragmentation and stainability
    February 2017: Clomid + TI + Progesterone = BFN
    March 2017: Clomid + HCG + IUI + Progesterone = SA/wash: zero count on attempt #1, <1,000 on attempt #2= BFN
    Varicocele Embolization- 5 May 17
    December 2017 SA: Zero improvement after embolization
    January IVF- 25 retrieved, 11 mature, 8 fertilized, 3 frozen day fives (3AA, 3AA, 3AA), 1 frozen day 6 (5BB), 1 frozen day 7 (3CC)
    Three PGS normal (3AA, 3AA, 5BB), one inconclusive (3AA)
    FET #1: 27 February 2018, 3AA & 5BB, one stuck! BFP 04 March 2018.... Loss confirmed 23 March 2018
    May 2018: SHG/SIS = all clear "beautiful uterus"
    FET #2: 04 June 2018, 3AA PGS normal embryo, 3AA PGS hatching inconclusive embryo. 
    BFP: 12 June 2018, EDD 20 February 2019
    Ultrasound, 25 June 2018: There are two
    Lost Baby A 02 July 2018
    Baby B not growing, D&C 06 July 2018
    Laparoscopy, hysteroscopy, chromotubation: 23 July 2018: blocked right tube, heavily inflamed, covered in endo. Removed right tube. Removed more endo from uterus, tubes, ovaries. Endo remains on bladder and bowel. 
    Next Up:
    TTC Naturally, possibly IUIs for remainder of 2018. 
    ER#2 ~Jan 2019
            

    beary67loveinakvirginiaham
  • @MommyForTheFirstTime wow. just wow. I can't believe the things that come out of peoples' mouths sometimes....even thinking something like that in your head is horrible, but who actually thinks these things and then think, "yup, that's a good thing to say out loud"...I can't even imagine how that feels for you in the situation.

    I really hope the other ladies at your work interjected and didn't just stand there awkwardly letting that new girl be such a heartless, unempathetic, uninformed moron.


    TTGP history (*TW*):

    Started TTC Oct 2015
    BFP #1 June 2016: EDD 16 March 2017, MC July 2016
    Re-started TTC Aug 2016
    Started IF testing Nov 2016
    Spontaneous BFP #2 January 2017: Rainbow Baby Boy September 2017
    BFP #3 November 2018: Baby #2 expected August 2019


    beary67
  • Zoey1019 said:
    question for you ladies....if I quote something with a picture (of a dreaded pee stick), is that a do or don't. I know we like to quote things so that others can see what is frowned upon, but the pee stick is still in my quote.... :cry: 

    QBF Stuck in Quotebox!
    @zoey1019 Admin took it down and it's gone from your quote too...so you don't have to worry about the quote :)

    TTGP history (*TW*):

    Started TTC Oct 2015
    BFP #1 June 2016: EDD 16 March 2017, MC July 2016
    Re-started TTC Aug 2016
    Started IF testing Nov 2016
    Spontaneous BFP #2 January 2017: Rainbow Baby Boy September 2017
    BFP #3 November 2018: Baby #2 expected August 2019


    Zoey1019beary67
  • @Buthayna - Most of the ladies had walked away by the time she opened her mouth, but the two who hear turned around super fast and stared her down. Something along the lines of "why the hell would you say that" and "you don't even know her" and "you're wrong and totally out of line" were all said while I just stood there like an idiot. 
    TTC #1 since September 2014
    Diagnoses: RPL, Endometriosis, MFI (count, morph, DNI, DNAS, multiple bilateral subclinical varicoceles), low progesterone
    Check out my Infertility blog 
    Check out my Infertility Instagram

    Loss History (TW):
    BFP: 3 May 2015, loss confirmed 4 June 2015
    BFP: 15 August 2015, loss confirmed 23 August 2015
    BFP: 16 November 2015, loss confirmed 22 November 2015
    BFP: 18 July 2016, loss confirmed same day
    BFP: 04 March 2018, loss confirmed 23 March 2018
    BFP: 12 June 2018, TWINS; D&C 06 July 2018
    TTC History (TW):
    3 losses in 2015
    Met with OBGYN in January 2016
    Me: all clear, H: OAT
    November 2016: HSG = All Clear!
    January 2017: H tested again,  High DNA fragmentation and stainability
    February 2017: Clomid + TI + Progesterone = BFN
    March 2017: Clomid + HCG + IUI + Progesterone = SA/wash: zero count on attempt #1, <1,000 on attempt #2= BFN
    Varicocele Embolization- 5 May 17
    December 2017 SA: Zero improvement after embolization
    January IVF- 25 retrieved, 11 mature, 8 fertilized, 3 frozen day fives (3AA, 3AA, 3AA), 1 frozen day 6 (5BB), 1 frozen day 7 (3CC)
    Three PGS normal (3AA, 3AA, 5BB), one inconclusive (3AA)
    FET #1: 27 February 2018, 3AA & 5BB, one stuck! BFP 04 March 2018.... Loss confirmed 23 March 2018
    May 2018: SHG/SIS = all clear "beautiful uterus"
    FET #2: 04 June 2018, 3AA PGS normal embryo, 3AA PGS hatching inconclusive embryo. 
    BFP: 12 June 2018, EDD 20 February 2019
    Ultrasound, 25 June 2018: There are two
    Lost Baby A 02 July 2018
    Baby B not growing, D&C 06 July 2018
    Laparoscopy, hysteroscopy, chromotubation: 23 July 2018: blocked right tube, heavily inflamed, covered in endo. Removed right tube. Removed more endo from uterus, tubes, ovaries. Endo remains on bladder and bowel. 
    Next Up:
    TTC Naturally, possibly IUIs for remainder of 2018. 
    ER#2 ~Jan 2019
            

    RatsPJ
  • @MommyForTheFirstTime I'm glad they had your back, at least, but it doesn't take away the pain of what was said in the first place :(

    TTGP history (*TW*):

    Started TTC Oct 2015
    BFP #1 June 2016: EDD 16 March 2017, MC July 2016
    Re-started TTC Aug 2016
    Started IF testing Nov 2016
    Spontaneous BFP #2 January 2017: Rainbow Baby Boy September 2017
    BFP #3 November 2018: Baby #2 expected August 2019


    beary67loveinak
  • @mommyforthefirsttime I am so sorry you have to deal with that. I know I would be a mess if someone said 1 of those things to me let alone 2x. No one should ever have to be told such horrible things. You are a good person and will be a great mother. I hope the rest of your day is much better.
    beary67
  • @MommyForTheFirstTime People are so freaking stupid! I am so sorry that they've apparently congregated near you. I am so so sorry! And very impressed you didn't throat punch them. A throat punch is appropriate 

    Married: 01/2010
    Mirena out late 8/2015, NTNP through holidays, TTC 1/16
    BFP: 5/16 - Baby boy:1/17 He's amazing!!!
    TFAS 9/17
    BFP: 2/18 - Baby girl: 9/18 She's fabulous!!!


    Steelerfan78picklespleasebeary67loveinak
  • @MommyForTheFirstTime People are assholes!  Violence is the answer!  Punch Em in the Face!



    *TW - Miscarriage mentioned*
    My MBF is my chart. DH and I have been benched post miscarriage until AF decides to rear her head, so I started temping again a few days after my loss so I wouldn't be freaking out about the length of my cycle.  FF gave me an "O" date about 10 days ago which was CD 11 (Bases on my heaviest day of bleeding for the miscarriage) and I was pretty excited it happened so quickly and found it calming that my body had regulated so quickly.  Anyway Saturday my temp dropped and I started cramping, so I thought Aunt Flow was coming.  I had some spotting when I wiped, and the next day my temp dropped again and FF took away my CH and still no AF.  Which sucks, cause I was rearing to get going again and now, I might not even have O'd yet.  :(  I hate my body.
     Me: 27 | DH: 28
    TTC since January 2016

    BFP - 3/12/16 - MC 4/5/16
    BFP - 6/11/16



    Pregnancy Ticker
  • @MommyForTheFirstTime I just....I don't even know what to say. That makes me speechless! Unreal. So sorry you had to face all these ignorant people this weekend/today!! I honestly feel like sometimes it's the super religious people who can be really judgmental. Not everyone obviously, not the good ones lol. Geez lady, be nice to yourself today!!
    Me: 30 MH: 31
    9/15 - Married! / TTC # 1
    4/16 - Non-Insulin Resistant PCOS / hsg = clear tubes/ SA = normal 
    5/16 - Letrozole 7.5mg + IUI = BFN
    6/16 - Letrozole 7.5mg + IUI = BFN
    7/16 - Letrozole 7.5mg + IUI = BFN
    8/16 - Letrozole 7.5mg + IUI = BFN
    9/16 - Gonal-f 150iu + IUI = BFN
    10/16 - Gonal-f 75iu, Menopur 75iu, Prednisone, Low Dose Naltrexone + IUI = BFN
    Break 
    4/17 - BFP Natural Cycle before IVF
    EDD: 1/6/18
    Baby Boy Born: 12/14/17


    picklespleasebeary67loveinak
  • canavaracanavara
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
    member
    edited April 2016
    Happy birthday @clover28


    You can always have a


    Edit for other comments:

    @mommyforthefirsttime -- I can't believe anyone would say that to you. If anything, you working in there is a selfless act and they should recognize that. Also, your coworker sounds like a freaking bitch. What a stupid misguided thing to say. *hugs*
    picklespleasebeary67
  • @MommyForTheFirstTime You absolutely win the MBF today. Either of those stories would be awful on their own but to have them both.. unbelievable. Creepy internet hugs to you.

    My MBF is that it's snowing. FFS.
    Me: 32
    DH: 33
    Married: October 2015
    TTC #1: October 2015
    EDD #1: June/July 2017

    picklespleasebeary67
  • @MommyForTheFirstTime - Girl what the literal shit. I am so sorry. What a bitch. That's obviously the biggest bull I've ever heard, but seriously wtf.
    MonaLisaRalphiobeary67loveinak
  • @mommyforthefirsttime I'm really sorry that you experienced that.  I know the whole experience must have been really hard.  

    My MBF is that we went on vacation for the weekend and ate crappy food all weekend.  I figured I would grab some pizza when we got back into town but now my stomach is all "eat a vegatable, woman" and I don't want to go to the
    groccery store.
    beary67
  • I only got through page 1... but I just need to tell @MommyForTheFirstTime ;how sorry I am that someone did that. I am in shock..  Like, how is that ok? On of my good friends from church has struggled with infertility for about 8 years now. And now she has severe chronic pain so she can't even try through IVF or anything right now. She watched DD in the nursery and has been the best nursery worker for years. The thought that someone would so that about someone I love so much (or anyone) just brought tears to my eyes. Again, so sorry and shame on them!

    Me: 28 year old SAHM/Birth Doula
    DH: 30 year old pneumatic electrical engineer 
    Married: October 8, 2011
    DD1: September 24, 2013
    BFP: June 25, 2016 and MC: July 3, 2016
    DD2: April 16, 2017
    BFP: November 30, 2018 EDD: August 14, 2019
    BabyFruit Ticker
    beary67virginiaham
  • ok, so I was going to post my own BFM but after @MommyForTheFirstTime ;I don't even think I can. As a Christian and someone who listens and talk to God I am so sorry that someone told you something so horrible. Every once and while I shock myself with an awful thought, but I would never, never. NEVER say them out loud. And I promise she wasn't telling you the truth. you will be a wonderful mother. It is so obvious, even on the internet.

    Me: 28 year old SAHM/Birth Doula
    DH: 30 year old pneumatic electrical engineer 
    Married: October 8, 2011
    DD1: September 24, 2013
    BFP: June 25, 2016 and MC: July 3, 2016
    DD2: April 16, 2017
    BFP: November 30, 2018 EDD: August 14, 2019
    BabyFruit Ticker
    MonaLisaRalphioNamelessAriabeary67virginiaham
  • @MommyForTheFirstTime - Wow. Just wow. Some people just don't get it. I'm sorry you had to go through 2(!) things like that in one day! Go do something really great for yourself. Fuck them!
    beary67
  • @MommyForTheFirstTime, I have no words, just hugs. I can't believe how often people fail to think through the ramifications of their stupid, stupid words.  I'm sorry you had to deal with both assholes. 


    I have a MBF today and it's kind of vain and definitely pretty mild compared to others, but I found out I have pityriasis rosea, which is more or less a rash that hangs around for six to eight weeks on average - sometimes as long as 12 weeks. It doesn't itch, but it's on my chest and neck and upper arms, so it's super visible and I'm super self conscious about people thinking I'm diseased. Potentially all summer. *sigh* 
    Me - 30  DH - 36
    Married 10/12/13
    TTC #1 since 10/15
    Chart!
    beary67
  • First off, thank you to everyone who wished me a happy birthday. It put a huge smile on my face!  I wish I could tag you all but I'm on mobile and its being wonky.

    Secondly, @MommyForTheFirstTime ..... So many hugs.  I am just in shock that someone would say that to you... Or even think it!  You are going to be an amazing mother.  Those babies in the nursery are lucky to have you there.


    MonaLisaRalphiobeary67
  • @Mommyforthefirsttime The ignorance of people really does shock me sometimes. I am so terribly sorry for both encounters. Please let some of what the women on here are saying soak in. It is not you. It is them. They are idiots. You WILL be an amazing mother someday. If you need me, I'm happy to come Melissa McCarthy your co-worker. For realz.

     
    1st BFP 12/12/13 DS born 8/2014
    TFAS March 2016 - BFP 5/19/16!!! EDD: 1/31/17
    Babysizer Cravings Pregnancy Tracker
    beary67
  • @clover28 Happy Birthday!! 

    @MommyForTheFirstTime ; I am so so sorry for the horrible insensitivity you have had to deal with!  I am constantly shocked by the number of people who don't filter the things they say!  I am glad that you turned to this board for support!  Hoping you get the chance to get out and do something that makes you smile today :)  Those children at the nursery are so lucky to have you there for them and don't let anyone make you feel differently about that!  Sending creepy internet hugs to you

    Me: 26 Hubs: 28

    Married: 6/6/15 <3

    Baby Girl: 3/22/2017


    Megs7911beary67
  • I just... Wow.  I am so sorry @MommyForTheFirstTime.  I have no words. 

    DD born PPROM preemie at 36 weeks on 10/1/17 after over a year TI, 
    then 3 failed IUIs, and finally a successful IVF FET.

    Due with #2 5/2/19 after HIO once in my FW,
    because apparently that's how life works now. Team Blue!
    Babysizer Geeky Pregnancy Tracker
    MonaLisaRalphiobeary67
  • @MonaLisaRalphio I saw that too....gross.  Someone must have reported them though because admin has removed the pictures now

    Me: 26 Hubs: 28

    Married: 6/6/15 <3

    Baby Girl: 3/22/2017


    beary67
  • greattttttt...so much to look forward to in J17!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :scream: 
    TTC #1 - December 2015
    Me:31 H:31
    DX: MFI - 1% Morph 
    12/16 -IVF #1 - Antagonist Protocol w/ Lupron trigger
    ER - 11 retrieved- 9 mature - 7 fertilized - 3 sent for PGS on day 5 - No normals (1 XXX Embryo - may use in future)
    3/17 - IVF #2 - Antagonist Protocol w/ HCG trigger
    ER- 13 retrieved - 11 mature - 8 fertilized - 2 sent for PGS on day 5 -2 Normal
    FET #1 - 5/16/17 - BFP! - Beta #1 5/25 - 156 - Beta #2 5/30 - 2562 - Beta #3 6/1 - 5191!




    beary67houseofsetterskhbear
  • So I'm a total newb...what is J17?



    Me: 32 DH: 31
    Married:  July 14, 2007
    TTC #1:  January 2008
    Surprise BFP:  November 2009
    DD Born: July 10, 2010
    TTC #2:  April 2016
    CP:  September 2016
    Chart Stalk Me




    beary67
  • Megzb510Megzb510
    Seventh Anniversary 1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    member
    edited April 2016
    So I'm a total newb...what is J17?
    @mylove071407 - it's referring to the January 2017 birth month board. Once you get a BFP you can move over to a birth month board which is the month of your estimate due date (EDD). 

    Zoey1019 said:
    greattttttt...so much to look forward to in J17!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :scream: 

     
    @Zoey1019 - i have been waiting for them to post the J17 board! ::off to lurk:::
    Me: 33 DH: 31
    DS: 5 years old
    TTC #2 since August 2015
    July 2016: Testing cycle with 100 mg Clomid = BFN
    August 2016: 50 mg Clomid + IUI = BFN
    October 2016: IVF#1 - 13 retrieved / 12 mature /  9 fertilized / 2 blasts
    November 2016: FET#1 = chemical
    January 2017: FET#2 = chemical
    March 2017: IVF#2 - 18 retrieved / 18 mature / 16 fertilized / 5 blasts
    April 24, 2017: FET#3 - BFN
    May 24, 2017: FET#4 - BFP! - Beta #1 151 - Beta #2 503 - Due date 2/9/18
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    beary67Zoey1019
  • @Megzb510  wow I'm oblivious.  It's been a long day.  



    Me: 32 DH: 31
    Married:  July 14, 2007
    TTC #1:  January 2008
    Surprise BFP:  November 2009
    DD Born: July 10, 2010
    TTC #2:  April 2016
    CP:  September 2016
    Chart Stalk Me




    beary67Megzb510
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