WTF Wednesday

ladystinson

 

ladystinson

Ok, so the fever may have pushed back O. I can deal with that, we were still HIO just in case. So I had the second dip on CD 21 and have been steadily rising since, I'm now on CD 25.... WTH are my CH FF? Its hard to successfully be BSC SS'ing when I don't even know for sure if I should be in TWW or WTO..... lol

kiwieloping

My WTF Wednesday goes out to my boss.  If you look up "bad bosses" she pretty much checks every point on the list.  Last month she said I could participate in a special leadership training program for my company.  Only 3 people per year get selected.  Yesterday, when it came down to her signing off on my application she just didn't reply to my email.  This morning she says she is not convinced my team would be ok with me being away for the amount of time required for the program because one of the managers that reports to me is on mat leave for the year and we have a new manager.  There will always be something like that happening.  She's just looking for an excuse to stop me from doing the training.  THIS is why I could never tell her we are TTC.  She would use it as an excuse to keep me away from opportunities because she looks for excuses.  ARGH!

hanshotfirst77

My WTF goes out to my co worker. I have a good friend/coworker who's wife is pregnant. I have known for awhile. But he apparently just told this other coworker of ours. The one who's wife is pregnant knows about your TTC struggles and he is sensitive to it. But this other coworker had no idea. Well the other one just walks right up to me and claims oh wow other coworker is pregnant!!! Yeah I know it's wonderful thanks! 

I know now nothing was meant by it and he doesn't know what I'm going through. But it was just like a slap in the face that I am
not pregnant! I'm super happy for my friend but I really don't need to hear about it like that all the time. Especially the way this guy just walked right up to me and said it. Not to anyone else just to me. Ughh I'm probably being way over sensitive. Arghh I thought I was done with my pity party guess not. 

picklesplease

I'm still stewing over having to take a half day off for a 5-minute appointment. Literally. 5 minutes!! My wait time was longer than the actually appointment!!

I guess the good news is that I get to hang out at home for an hour and a half to drink a nice cup of coffee before I go to work.

Lecool

@BerkeBaby Hope your appointment went well! Enjoy the extra relaxing time before work! 

Winnie81_Old

WTF to invasive questions. I've been with my husband for about 10 years. His ex that he briefly dated from years before, happens to be one of our mutual friends sister. His ex randomly messaged me asking how DH was, and if we are planning to have children soon...I never responded to her message. THEN, his exes mom commented on my profile pic on FB with "babies?"...no response from me so then she comments again and says "Are you guys going to ever have kids?" "Just curious."...W.T.F. Lady i don't know you, but you have now made me change my privacy settings on Facebook (neither one are on our friends list). Neither one of us have had any contact with them in over 10 years. Thanks for the reminder that other people are wondering why we don't have children yet.


*ETA now that I'm thinking about it, since we are friends with the sister, they are probably keeping tabs on us.

thj101

kiwielopingbride said:

My WTF Wednesday goes out to my boss.  If you look up "bad bosses" she pretty much checks every point on the list.  Last month she said I could participate in a special leadership training program for my company.  Only 3 people per year get selected.  Yesterday, when it came down to her signing off on my application she just didn't reply to my email.  This morning she says she is not convinced my team would be ok with me being away for the amount of time required for the program because one of the managers that reports to me is on mat leave for the year and we have a new manager.  There will always be something like that happening.  She's just looking for an excuse to stop me from doing the training.  THIS is why I could never tell her we are TTC.  She would use it as an excuse to keep me away from opportunities because she looks for excuses.  ARGH!

Is your boss my boss?! I feel you, I have to deal with the same crap. Day in and day out. 

  

sldp123

@ladystinson FF isn't going to give you CHs because of those two higher temps on CD18-19. You need to have three temps higher than the previous six. Without those temps, it will probably give you CHs for CD21, but I'm not sure if you have reason enough to discard them. Do you think they were still high as a result of the fever you had before that? 

@BerkeBaby Hope you get good results!

ladystinson

@sldp123 no I don't have any reason to discard them because, short of the fevers, everything else on the chart is within reason for me. And if I do higher than those temps I would be fevered again lol
FWIW, I just discarded them for kicks and giggles and I still didnt get CH's... 

picklesplease

Will find out in 24-48 hours. Thanks, ladies!

linzrunz

WTF body??  Super annoyed with how my body reacts post-O.  I deal with these things every month about this time (depression, insomnia, extreme irritability, etc.) so you'd think I'd be used to it.  But every month it gets to me.  I couldn't bring myself to watch last week's episode of Grey's Anatomy because I knew I'd be a blubbering mess by the end.  I cry every episode even on a GOOD day.  DH watched NCIS last night...and I cried.  I'm pretty sure I cried at some stupid commercial.  I also couldn't stand anything touching me - blankets, DH, the cat, DH's pillow, imaginary things I think are touching me.  It's ridiculous.  So WTF body??

whiska

My office has become a holding place for a lot of paper documents and patient records that I utilize the most but everyone needs access to, and now two people have keys to my office.  This is my nightmare because my biggest frickin work pet peeve: do NOT come into my space, shuffle papers around, take things without telling me, and then leave my door wide open (for potential purse thieves; my office is right next to a patient waiting area).  I had this problem at my last job and there were two times I actually cried about it.  I just feel like it's 1) invasive and 2) shows a lack of respect.  She's only had the key one damn day and the first time she uses it this morning, I'm two floors away for an hour, and I come back and my door's wide open with my iphone charging and purse in plain sight.  This is not cool!

Now I need to put a screensaver lock on my computer in case my boss comes in when I'm not in here and I've been bumping... I'm just like,


It blows because I've realized that my boss is a micromanager, she doesn't understand delegation very well (what really sucks is that it comes from a place of cooperativity and all-hands-on-deck), and now I feel like everything has to be pristinely perfect and organized at every second of every day because she will complain about looking for something.  Meanwhile I am going to go crazy because I want to tell her, "Wait for me, Ask me, Trust me to do my job!"  



**This is a solid bitchfest.  My plan is to stay organized and try not to get so upset, and I'll probably tell her she needs to close the damn door.  I just hate that my biggest work nightmare is coming true.

QueenSunscreen

I have two WTFs today. The first is a WTAF to myself. Why did I think that listening to a podcast at work about extreme preemies (Radiolab if anyone is interested) on CD 1 would be a good idea?  Emotional abuse. Then there were clips of the kids talking in their little high pitched toddler voices. I lost my shit. *sigh*

The second is to the place I went to get a lash perm and tint yesterday. It was a place I've never been for a service I've never had. I arrived early and the lady came out and told me that her manager who scheduled me is an idiot and we didn't have enough time to do both services. She told me I'd be coming back next week for the second half. I politely explained that I took time off of work, drove 45 minutes one way and that if I couldn't have the services I scheduled, I'd be cancelling the entire appointment. She got mad at me for wanting to cancel - like this was my fault? - and passive aggressively accepted me for both services and told me she'd just have to call her next client and tell them that she'd be late. 

Oddly enough (heh), she didn't explain anything she was doing, berated me for not taking out my contacts, didn't ask my preferences for the tint color (just did black), left my room 4 times to apologize loudly to the next person, and let me leave with black smudges all over my eyelids. I never tip poorly but tipped her 5$ on a 75$ bill. 

furbabymom2007

@QueenSunscreen what is a lash perm????  

And the tint... Is that like permanent mascara???

QueenSunscreen

@furbabymom2007  it's a perm like for your hair with much more gentle chemicals for your eyelashes.  It keeps them curled for the life of the eyelash - about 4 to 8 weeks, depending on how quickly you shed them. I'm not super impressed with the perm part, but I have fairly short eyelashes to begin with, so I have a feeling that's why I feel less than pumped about it. I do like the tint very much. I'm a pale skinned dirty blonde naturally and my eyelashes disappear into my face without assistance. I did lash extensions for a while but they annoyed me. 

Edit to add - Yeah the lash tint is pretty much that. It lasts theoretically as long as the lash, but I could see it washing out over time with normal face washing. I tear during the allergy season (the next 6+ months) so I was intrigued by it!  

HLD3194

My WTF goes to my DH...he got a flat tire last night and took my car to work and made me drive to work with his partially filled tire. I'm not far at all, maybe 1.5 miles, but the whole time I was freaking that I would be stranded on the side of the road...not to mention I have only been at my current job for 9 weeks! Not the way I wanted to start my day, but on the flip side found out we're getting out early on Friday and paid for the whole day!

NamelessAria

My WTF is about about the TTC community on Reddit. I help moderate one of the TTC related subreddits so I usually pop on everyday just to check out what is going on and see what is in the moderation queue. Yes, I'm sorry, I'm cheating on y'all with Reddit. Anyhow, I log on today and see a post titled "Remember when..." that goes on some rant along the lines of "remember when you started TTC and the first couple of cycles didn't go as you planned? Remember when you were frustrated and sad and reached out to ask for support. Remember when you were told to "suck it up, buttercup. Come back when you're been trying for 5, 10, 20, 3000 cycles and we'll talk."

So the post goes on to say that the long term TTC ladies "may be bitter" and that the long term TTC ladies should stop telling the new ladies not to worry when they don't get pregnant the first month or two. I mean come on. You can't just make a post saying the long term ladies are "bitter" and then demand we treat a women who hasn't gotten pregnant in 1 cycle the same way we treat a women who hasn't gotten pregnant in 20 cycles. Those are not the same thing. I'm not trying to have a pain Olympics over here but seriously. 

Of course all the ladies who have been TTC <5 months comment on the thread like "preach it sister!" And I'm over here like "WTF is this $h*t?"

ETA: Here is the link in case anyone is curious. 

MelissaM090

I have a really stupid one and I feel like all I do is bitch about my MIL on here, but yesterday she sent both DH and I an out-of-the-blue text to remind us it was her husband's son's birthday.

This man, who I guess is technically DH's step-brother, but we've met him like, twice, he lives nowhere near us, he's older than us, we have nothing in common with him, we don't have him on Facebook or any other means of communication... we weren't invited to his wedding, he wasn't invited to ours... so... what? Okay... thanks? What am I supposed to do with this information?

Since she also texted DH, I figured I didn't need to respond, so I didn't. Then I found out this morning he also didn't know what to say to that, so he ignored her too. Pretty sure we're going to pay for that when we see her Saturday.

mrsdaddario

@MelissaM090  I have bitched about my MIL before and plan to do so in the future. So bitch away!! LOL I know what it's like to have a difficult MIL. Judgement free zone. 

whiska

@NamelessAria I found it!  I understand what that girl is saying but there really is a difference between people who conceive naturally in a few cycles and those facing reproductive assistance.  Bitter is kind of a derogatory term in that I'll own up to it - I am bitter (should I save this for FFFC?) - but others have no right to call me bitter.  And yeah, go ahead and be sad if you want that cycle 1 didn't happen for you but don't freak out/worry. 

Man, Reddit has always been so difficult for me to navigate.  Makes me thankful for this community!

picklesplease

@MelissaM090 - Don't worry about venting about your MIL! I think there are multiple women on here who feel the same way, myself included. You vent all you want.

MelissaM090

@mrsdaddario & @BerkeBaby Haha, thanks. I feel like such a brat when it comes to her but something about her communication methods really rubs me the wrong way.

@whiska I hear you on the Reddit thing. I consider myself a fairly intelligent person overall but Reddit is over my head for some reason. I DO know that DH follows a sub-Reddit (correct term? yes?) called The Real Girls Reddit, and while as a wife I should probably be disapproving of the content, I've seen it... and yeah, okay, I get it.

NamelessAria

whiska said:

@NamelessAria I found it!  I understand what that girl is saying but there really is a difference between people who conceive naturally in a few cycles and those facing reproductive assistance.  Bitter is kind of a derogatory term in that I'll own up to it - I am bitter (should I save this for FFFC?) - but others have no right to call me bitter.  And yeah, go ahead and be sad if you want that cycle 1 didn't happen for you but don't freak out/worry. 

Man, Reddit has always been so difficult for me to navigate.  Makes me thankful for this community!

I know how you feel here. I really don't think the post would have rubbed me the wrong way nearly as much if it hadn't said that long term TTC ladies "may feel bitter." I was reading it like "okay I mean she does kinda have a point. "...may be bitter.." Whoa. Let's just hit pause right there because I can't even." I think everything after that just rubbed me the wrong way because I was still fuming over the whole "...may be bitter.." bit.

AliciaGoose

My WTF goes to my DH who planned a boys night at our apartment tonight after I said yesterday I wanted to spend the night with him watching a movie and going for a nice walk (We've both been super busy and haven't had a night or day to ourselves in a week and a half). He claims I apparently said "it's fine" at some point. Which is nonsense. But he honestly believes I said it. Ugh. Looks like I'm going for some retail therapy. So not in the mood to be home now.

whiska

Yeah, assigning "bitter" to longtime ttc-ers is a big no-no, no matter the context.

kiwieloping

thj101 said:

kiwielopingbride said:

My WTF Wednesday goes out to my boss.  If you look up "bad bosses" she pretty much checks every point on the list.  Last month she said I could participate in a special leadership training program for my company.  Only 3 people per year get selected.  Yesterday, when it came down to her signing off on my application she just didn't reply to my email.  This morning she says she is not convinced my team would be ok with me being away for the amount of time required for the program because one of the managers that reports to me is on mat leave for the year and we have a new manager.  There will always be something like that happening.  She's just looking for an excuse to stop me from doing the training.  THIS is why I could never tell her we are TTC.  She would use it as an excuse to keep me away from opportunities because she looks for excuses.  ARGH!

Is your boss my boss?! I feel you, I have to deal with the same crap. Day in and day out. 

  

It's possible or maybe they both read the "How to be not awesome at your job" handbook.  It's my major source of stress in my life. I love my job and if I could avoid interactions with her I would be golden!

Megzb510

NamelessAria said:

whiska said:

@NamelessAria I found it!  I understand what that girl is saying but there really is a difference between people who conceive naturally in a few cycles and those facing reproductive assistance.  Bitter is kind of a derogatory term in that I'll own up to it - I am bitter (should I save this for FFFC?) - but others have no right to call me bitter.  And yeah, go ahead and be sad if you want that cycle 1 didn't happen for you but don't freak out/worry. 

Man, Reddit has always been so difficult for me to navigate.  Makes me thankful for this community!

I know how you feel here. I really don't think the post would have rubbed me the wrong way nearly as much if it hadn't said that long term TTC ladies "may feel bitter." I was reading it like "okay I mean she does kinda have a point. "...may be bitter.." Whoa. Let's just hit pause right there because I can't even." I think everything after that just rubbed me the wrong way because I was still fuming over the whole "...may be bitter.." bit.

@NamelessAria - oh I totally agree with you on the "bitter" term.  I don't like it. Just out of curiosity what is the vibe / culture of the Reddit TTC subreddit? Is it like here? I have a user name but I never post on Reddit but I would be interested if it's a similar atmosphere to this board. Sometimes this board goes quiet and I want somewhere else to post!

PepperAT

WTF to myself! I have been so forgetful today, starting with leaving my phone at home this morning. No phone all day was super boring but it felt a little nice to disconnect. 

Also, WTF to DH. What part of we are on a budget do you not understand! I hate that we argue about money, but come on man, get your shit together! 

I feel  better now. Lol

NamelessAria

@Megzb510 I'd describe the community over there as a weird mix of here, what it sounds like the Babycenter community is probably like, and a Google search.

Basically it feels to me like it predominately ladies who haven't been TTC very long. There are a couple of ladies who are active who have been TTC longer (for the purpose of this discussion we'll count "longer" as >8 months). Most of the ladies who were the "long term TTCers" over there have finally gotten their BFPs and occasionally chime in on stuff but mostly they lurk now. 

It feels like the majority of ladies over there don't temp or chart. That could just be because the ladies who are temping and charting participate in some of the weekly threads like "Temping Tuesday" and "Waiting Wednesday" and that's about it. They usually aren't the people making separate posts about how they're "late" but still getting BFNs so they're totally confused. They're also typically not the ladies making separate threads about how they have sore boobs so surely they're totes KTFU this cycle. 

There are a lot of newer ladies asking a lot of simple questions. There are a lot of posts that are just vents about whatever TTC related. Ya know, the typical "my friend told me that she's pregnant so I'm having a hard day" and "I just started spotting so I'm out this cycle."

There just isn't really the same sense of community there. Like, I know a lot of you ladies. I recognize your usernames and I can associate those names with stories and times you've been there to support me on a tough TTC day. I feel like I know a lot of the ladies here. Or ya know, about as well as you can know a group of ladies that you've never seen and probably never will see in real life. But over on Reddit I only recognize a precious few names. And even the names I recognize I can't say I know much about their story. And I can't really think of many times where I've offered support/gotten support. 


ETA: Despite all that I do occasionally post over there. Usually because the board over there isn't that active that day and it's something that should probably go into the WTO/TWW but I feel weird posting and ghosting that day. Or something like that. I also just have days where I enjoy getting to offer science-based advice and answer the questions of the newer ladies. I started over there before I found this TTC community and so I like to give-back where I can. This community is by far my favorite.

**Possible TW: offensive terms/expressions related to loss**

There are also quite a few ladies over there who use "baby dust." So for anyone who finds this to be triggering it may not be a "community" you want to explore. I've been trying to gently, but firmly, tell people there to stop using "baby dust" but there are always the new people who don't know.

Neikoda

NamelessAria Which sub-reddit do you moderate? I'm an avid Imgur user but stumble onto Reddit at times.

NamelessAria

@nwegman7878 I'm one of the mods for /r/TFABLinePorn. I'm the horribly mean person who removes posts that don't follow the rules haha

redheeler

My WTF is to my hairdresser!

last time I got my hair done (cut, colour and straightened) it was around $100 although over 2yrs ago before I had DS, went today and it cost me $170!!! Like yeah ok I know it's quite long but that was ridiculous! Good thing it was DH's shout!

also DS just go to sleep and stop yelling at me! I know you're tired, I can't fix it if you won't go to sleep

britters314

I know it's Thursday now, but I have no other place to rant about this. My apartment building is getting new windows installed in the all the units, so they are blocking off one of the building entrances for the workers during the day. That's fine and all, but the laundry room is right next to that entrance, so it's blocked off too! There are over 200 apartments in this building, so it's next to impossible to get an open machine on evenings and weekends AND three of the washers are out of order so it's even harder! Now I can't even do laundry on my day off while everyone else is at work. I emailed my landlord to ask what time it will be open again and apparently she is out of the office until Monday. I think I'm just going to go sneak under the barrier and do my laundry anyway...