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Weekly Benched/TTA Check-In (1/24)

***General TW that this thread can and most likely will mention MC and loss.***

This is a place for those of us who have already started TTC, but have hit a roadblock and are delaying for whatever reason. You can express your thoughts, feelings, and frustrations on not TTC and connect with others who are in the same boat. TTC can be a long journey, and having to wait makes it feel even longer- even if it is for a good reason. Feel free to resurrect this thread at any point in the week if you have something to say, and treat this like an ongoing conversation.

Generally:
Benched = involuntarily not NTNP/TTC and are "out of the game," usually due to medical reasons
TTA = avoiding pregnancy by using protection or FAM, usually for non-health-related reasons
*Note: NTNP = you are having sex without protection whenever you feel like it. This is generally not the same as Benched or TTA*
__________________________________________________________________

Are you benched or TTA? 

(Optional Question:) What brings you here?

How long do you think you'll be here? 

How has being benched/TTA been going? 

Anything else you'd like to share (R/R/CS)? 

QOTW: Seeing the wedding pictures in the TWW have me jelly, so: if you're married, what were your wedding colours? And what was your cake like? If you're not married, do you know what you would want your wedding colours to be?

Me: 30 | DH: 34 | DSS: 14 | DS: 4
PG #2, EDD 10/12/2023

Re: Weekly Benched/TTA Check-In (1/24)

  • Options
    Are you benched or TTA? Benched

    What brings you here? Natural miscarriage at 12+1 on 1/16

    How long do you think you'll be here? One cycle, but who knows how long that will be. I've seen many ladies on TB have longer and f'd up cycles after loss.

    How has being benched/TTA been going? Since my miscarriage took 6 days from start of bleeding to finish, and we had already been waiting a week and a half since finding out our LO was no longer growing, I feel like I'm finally to the point where I can focus on what's next, rather than continuing to ask why this happened to my baby. I am now comfortable with the idea of TTC after this cycle is over.

    Anything else you'd like to share (R/R/CS)? I keep meaning to start temping and keep forgetting...

    QOTW: we had blood red as the color, and everything was either white, black or red. We didn't have a wedding cake - we had cheesecake with different toppings people could add to it. Fun question!
    me 30; DH 35
    TTC since May 2014.
    Aug 2014 BFP, EDD April 22, 2015. Low progesterone, started suppositories. Loss at 5w6d.
    Nov 19, 2015 BFP at 13 dpo, EDD July 29, 2016. MMC discovered 12/29 (9+4). Natural miscarriage 1/16 (12+1).
    AMH results 0.42, 1.2; FSH 12.1, AFC 10, dx DOR. 
    RPL testing results normal. Nurse recommended progesterone suppositories in TWW.
    Clomid + trigger + TI cycle August 2016 - failed. Thin lining.
    Femara + trigger + TI cycle December 2016 - failed. Thin lining.
    Short LP (8 days).
    Acupuncture & Chinese herbs starting January 2017, lengthened LP to 10 days 

    Summer 2016 LFAF awards: 



    Winter 2016/2017 LFAF awards:

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    izza2izza2 member
    edited January 2016
    @AL_TwinCities - A cheesecake sounds delish! I never thought of that... now I wish I had, haha!

    Are you benched or TTA? TTA

    What brings you here? School
    How long do you think you'll be here? 7 months
    How has being benched/TTA been going? Good
    Anything else you'd like to share (R/R/CS)? I missed two of my BC pills -- took them the next morning, but they were the last two before my period week, so.. no problemo there. And now that we're in 2016 and we're almost half a year away from TTC again, I'm worried that hubby will want to wait another year. I can understand why, since a pregnancy this year would mean a baby during my senior year, but... I don't know. I would rather graduate with a baby or pregnant than wait until I've graduated to try...

    QOTW: Seeing the wedding pictures in the TWW have me jelly, so: if you're married, what were your wedding colours? And what was your cake like? If you're not married, do you know what you would want your wedding colours to be?
    Our wedding colours were emerald green and white. The show-cake was a simple two-tiered chocolate cake with white frosting and some green flowers with our topper. The sheet cake we had for serving was half chocolate and half vanilla.

    Me: 30 | DH: 34 | DSS: 14 | DS: 4
    PG #2, EDD 10/12/2023

  • Options
    @CajunSnowWhite89 I'm sorry this journey is taking so long for you. Hopefully focusing on other things for a while will be a nice break. This certainly is an emotional roller coaster. Hugs!
    me 30; DH 35
    TTC since May 2014.
    Aug 2014 BFP, EDD April 22, 2015. Low progesterone, started suppositories. Loss at 5w6d.
    Nov 19, 2015 BFP at 13 dpo, EDD July 29, 2016. MMC discovered 12/29 (9+4). Natural miscarriage 1/16 (12+1).
    AMH results 0.42, 1.2; FSH 12.1, AFC 10, dx DOR. 
    RPL testing results normal. Nurse recommended progesterone suppositories in TWW.
    Clomid + trigger + TI cycle August 2016 - failed. Thin lining.
    Femara + trigger + TI cycle December 2016 - failed. Thin lining.
    Short LP (8 days).
    Acupuncture & Chinese herbs starting January 2017, lengthened LP to 10 days 

    Summer 2016 LFAF awards: 



    Winter 2016/2017 LFAF awards:

  • Options

    @CajunSnowWhite89 I'm sorry this journey is taking so long for you. Hopefully focusing on other things for a while will be a nice break. This certainly is an emotional roller coaster. Hugs!

    Thanks! I feel like I'm just whining all the time, but I also feel like I have the right to be frustrated after 2 years. But at least we're taking the next step now.

    Hugs for you as well! FX that your cycles regulate quickly now that you're ready to TTC again.

    @izza2 what are you going to school for? (Sorry if this has been asked a thousand times, just curious lol)
    Me:27 DH: 28
    Married May 2012
     TTC#1 July 2013 - July 2015 (no success)
    Again TTC#1: Dec 2015
    First RE visit: Feb 2016
    BFP: 9/16/16 EDD:5/26/17
  • Options
    **Loss mentioned**

    Are you benched or TTA? TTA

    (Optional Question:) What brings you here? We are about to get back into TTC after this cycle ends. I had a MC at the beginning of December, and it's time.

    How long do you think you'll be here? Just a couple of more weeks. Once the MC happened, we decided to take a 2 cycle break and get past the holidays.

    How has being benched/TTA been going? It was pretty depressing and stressful at the beginning, but all is well now. Just ready to move forward and stay positive.

    QOTW: Back in 2010, our colors were black and white. 6 year later, I probably would go with an accent color to slightly help those 2 colors. It was the best day ever, y'all!
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    @CajunSnowWhite89 - Nursing. I did a year fresh out of high school and then took a few years off because my mother got sick. It sucks going back to finish the degree when I'm really ready to expand the family and get on with my life, but.. It had to be done.

    Me: 30 | DH: 34 | DSS: 14 | DS: 4
    PG #2, EDD 10/12/2023

  • Options
    Are you benched or TTA? TTA

    What brings you here? My best friend is getting married in Mexico at the end of February, and it's either TTA until we get back, risk the zika virus, or cancel our flights and hotel and tell my best friend I won't attending her wedding.

    How long do you think you'll be here? Until mid-March.

    How has being benched/TTA been going? It's frustrating, but given my options I know its the best choice.

    QOTW: We had a casual Sunday afternoon wedding outside in late June, so I just colors to go with that- sky blue and sunny yellow.
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    Welcome @HookEmNelson. I was on the same BMB as you. I'm sorry for your loss and hope you have been doing okay.
    me 30; DH 35
    TTC since May 2014.
    Aug 2014 BFP, EDD April 22, 2015. Low progesterone, started suppositories. Loss at 5w6d.
    Nov 19, 2015 BFP at 13 dpo, EDD July 29, 2016. MMC discovered 12/29 (9+4). Natural miscarriage 1/16 (12+1).
    AMH results 0.42, 1.2; FSH 12.1, AFC 10, dx DOR. 
    RPL testing results normal. Nurse recommended progesterone suppositories in TWW.
    Clomid + trigger + TI cycle August 2016 - failed. Thin lining.
    Femara + trigger + TI cycle December 2016 - failed. Thin lining.
    Short LP (8 days).
    Acupuncture & Chinese herbs starting January 2017, lengthened LP to 10 days 

    Summer 2016 LFAF awards: 



    Winter 2016/2017 LFAF awards:

  • Options
    Are you benched or TTA? TTA

    (Optional Question:) What brings you here? We are waiting to TTC until DH is done with school and our vacation.

    How long do you think you'll be here? 7 months

    How has being benched/TTA been going? Fine. I do want to TTC and DH doesn't care either way, but this is for the best and it is going fast.

    Anything else you'd like to share (R/R/CS)?

    QOTW: Seeing the wedding pictures in the TWW have me jelly, so: if you're married, what were your wedding colours? And what was your cake like? If you're not married, do you know what you would want your wedding colours to be? Our colors were silver, black, and dark green.

    We had cakes on each guest table so they could trade cake slices try a variety of cake. They were also able to take extra cake home if they wanted. We had a variety of cakes flavored including almond with strawberry filling, German chocolate, white cake with raspberry filling, and one more that we cannot remember. The cakes were amazing and delicious! I am going to get DH one from the bakery for our anniversary in May. We did eat it on our one year anniversary and it was as delicious as it was when we got married.
    Married 5/21/2011
    DD 1 10/2012
    CP 9/2013
    DD 2 6/2014
    CP 3/2016        
     BFP 12/8/2016        
    BabyFruit Ticker
        
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    @AL_TwinCities I was pretty positive we were..thank you for confirming it. I am deeply sorry for your loss. We are in this together, friend.
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    TTA

    (Optional Question:) What brings you here? Waiting to start trying until my baby is 18 months

    How long do you think you'll be here? Another couple weeks

    How has being benched/TTA been going? It's been going well. I have been charting for 3 years now and I'm amazed to see how much I continue to learn.

    Anything else you'd like to share (R/R/CS)?

    QOTW: My wedding was very simple. My colors were persimmon and green, which sounds awful, but all I really knew was that I wanted tiger lilies so I went with tiger lily colors. For cake we had cupcakes.

    I like having a place to keep up while I'm waiting to start ttc. I hope the days fly by for you all!
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    Are you benched or TTA: Benched

    What brings you here? MC, Dec/Jan

    How long do you think you'll be here? Well, I am happy to say that the bleeding has finally stopped! So now, we just have to wait for one cycle. So, the waiting game again but at least now I feel less crappy.

    How has being benched/TTA been going? Way better since last week. I not only feel physically better, but emotionally too.

    Anything else you'd like to share (R/R/CS)? Trying to temp this cycle so I have an idea what's going on, but I'm having a hard time getting back in the habit.

    QOTW: our colors were black and white, with red accents. So all my girls wore floor length black dresses, and we all carried red roses. I wasn't one of those girls who dreamed of my wedding for years, so I picked the colors, my dress, and left the rest up to our moms. It turned out really nicely.

    Oh, the other big thing was that my SIL and I did an entire "chocolate table" where everything on the table was chocolate covered (even the decorations/risers). We even dipped two whole bunches of grapes. I've been married since 2009 and people still ask me about the chocolate table.
    Rainbow baby Dean is due 2/17/17!
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    @AL_TwinCities wedding cheesecake is brilliant! Fingers crossed for both of us to have a nice, relatively normal cycle.

    @CajunSnowWhite89 sorry you are having a rough time. This emotional roller coaster can be hard to ride at times. Hopefully the RE gives you good news, and the break leaves you feeling refreshed.

    @izza2 I feel you on DH possibly delaying things further. My DH took awhile to be on board TTC, then all of a sudden he was ready.

    @HookEmNelson sorry to see you back here, but glad to hear you are staying positive!

    @housewifehobbyist, that sucks about the zika virus. Seriously, no good choices there.

    @hupp0013 that is a great idea about the mini cakes on each table!

    @mattanderin15 I'm amazed at your consistency in charting for three years. Seriously I barely make it to confirmed crosshairs each month.
    Rainbow baby Dean is due 2/17/17!
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    @WinchesterGirl I'm sorry about your loss! I hope your cycles even out nicely. Also, I certainly haven't had 3 full years of compete charts. If I ever get messed up, like being away from home, it was so hard to get back into the swing of it, as it sounds like you're going through now!
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    mrsstuessymrsstuessy member
    edited January 2016
    Are you benched or TTA? TTA

    (Optional Question:) What brings you here? Waiting for my husband to finish grad school this spring

    How long do you think you'll be here? We will start TTC April 24th. At that point we will know for sure that DH will indeed be graduating and also I have a thing against a Christmastime baby, so that puts us pretty far into January. I know, I'm weird. 

    How has being benched/TTA been going? It has been hard. I personally have definitely been ready since last summer. But now that we are only a few months away it is getting easier because I am excited to finally start and I can see the finish line. 

    Anything else you'd like to share (R/R/CS)? I'm sorry, what does R/R/CS mean? I started taking a prenatal and a calcium supplement on Saturday. I have one more cycle on birth control and then Feb. 19th I will be taking my Nuvaring out for good. And today I scheduled my normal OBGYN appointment for March. I will be talking to my doctor about TTC and hopefully she will say I am good to go. 

    QOTW: Seeing the wedding pictures in the TWW have me jelly, so: if you're married, what were your wedding colours? And what was your cake like? If you're not married, do you know what you would want your wedding colours to be?
    I love my wedding. It was the most magical day of my life. Everything went so well and it was so much fun. It was only a couple months after I turned 21. I was such a naive baby. So blissfully unaware of how hard life can be. And so in love. We got married in my parent's backyard in October. We had a mix of copper/brown fall colors with pops of blue and green. I wish I could share all my wedding photos. I love them.

    EDIT:
    Ugh... it has been too long since I have been on here. Remind me how to post photos. I am not doing this right. 

    Me: 28 year old SAHM/Birth Doula
    DH: 30 year old pneumatic electrical engineer 
    Married: October 8, 2011
    DD1: September 24, 2013
    BFP: June 25, 2016 and MC: July 3, 2016
    DD2: April 16, 2017
    BFP: November 30, 2018 EDD: August 14, 2019
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • Options
    Are you benched or TTA? Benched.

    (Optional Question:) What brings you here? Waiting to hear back on if I have APS. Final blood test is today. DH and I have decided that we want to know exactly whats wrong before we start TTC again. That way if something is wrong, my OB/GYN is going to set me up with progesterone to aid with implantation and start me on an asprin regiment and heparin for when we conceive. 

    How long do you think you'll be here? Hopefully we'll get blood results back within a week and take whatever steps we need to from there. Hope to be back on my next cycle mid February.

    How has being benched/TTA been going? It sucks. I'm terrified of how difficult it's going to be to maintain a pregnancy if I do have this blood clotting issue. Two early MC's at 22 and I don't know that I can handle the heartbreak of it happening again.

    Anything else you'd like to share (R/R/CS)? Recently realized how many sexist jerks work with me. Apparently my opinion just isn't valued the same. :(

    QOTW: Seeing the wedding pictures in the TWW have me jelly, so: if you're married, what were your wedding colours? And what was your cake like? If you're not married, do you know what you would want your wedding colours to be? My wedding colors were a deep red, black and white. My cake matched with white buttercream frosting with those black swirly designs and red roses on each tier.
    Me: 23 | DH: 27
    Married: 10.11.15
    MC #1: June 2014
    MC #2: December 2015
    APS Diagnosis: February 2016
    BFP 7/24, EDD 4/5/17
    Previously nweg...7878
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