Anybody having a post-baby shower?

elledriver88

I was talked into having a shower after the baby came which I loved at the time! I figured it would be a good chance to show her off and let her meet people all at once (and maybe cut down on the pop-ins after she is born.) Now I'm starting to get frustrated with my decision because there is so much I need before baby comes. I have been buying things off my own registry to show that I already have it, and now I'm getting some comments that my registry doesn't have enough items. What can you do, I need things that can't wait until 3-4 weeks after baby is born. Has anyone decided to do their baby shower after the baby comes and are you struggling with this?

red3ye

I'm doing a "meet and greet" which is what we call it here, where everyone comes and sees the baby. Here though, for meet and greets, we don't do gifts. We might door a diaper raffle, but otherwise everyone just brings food and their kids and everyone eats and enjoys the young ones. We won't have a registry and other than maybe some diapers we won't receive anything but left over food (that is the perk, mommy gets the leftovers)

kitteh81

I've heard of Sip n See parties, which are similar, but from what I've heard the gifts are definitely more like clothes and diapers and not necessities. I can definitely see how that would be frustrating, especially if you are a FTM and don't have basics around to get you through til the shower.

elledriver88

I hadn't heard of a sip n see before, this is definitely a baby shower and not a meet and greet. I am a FTM and I wish I had have put more thought into this, it was at the recommendation of my host who is a mom 3x over. I'm a little embarrassed now that my guests might think it's weird to have the baby there and be doing a registry!

SarahFoley725

Agree with PPs post baby things are more casual. Is it possible you could talk to your host and just say "hey so I know we had talked about waiting but I'm just SO overwhelmed with all of the things we need to get ready for baby. Do you think we could go ahead and move the shower up? It would make me feel so much better."

amaniupendo

Newborns don't need a lot! A safe place to sleep and some clothes and a blanket are the only real necessities. Some bottles if you FF.

jenniferamcooper

I had 3 showers with my first. One with family and friends on my side of the family 4 hours away and a work one which were both before baby. My local one with our friends and my husband's family was 3 weeks after baby.

I second PPs, newborns really don't need a lot. We were team green so most people bought us clothes at our 3rd shower. We rarely wore real clothes on baby for the first 3 month, and our in-laws that had bought us essential stuff gave it to us before the shower - crib mattress, monitor, etc.

Your instincts were right though, a post-baby shower reduced pop-ins. It was awesome!!! We had none : )

Knottie59802221

I always say screw etiquette and do whatever works best for you. If someone is really your friend then they won't judge or think you're rude. My friend had a baby shower after the baby was born and I loved it. She got to open presents and pass some toys straight to the newborn and watch him eyeball it, lol. I had the only present he reached out to grab! It was an adorable and proud moment. Not to mention, holding the baby was a great excuse to not participate in the more painful of the shower games.

As for the registry, I registered on amazon cause that's pretty much the only place I shop, but I'm noticing people are just looking at my list and then going shopping on their own so nothing is getting checked off as bought. Every single person I talk to though says they're including a gift receipt so I'm not worried. Just buy what you need, don't mark it off, and return things you get doubles of. A little leg work is easier then stressing yourself out.

Edited for grammer cause I'm awful at it.

tJaffe

I have no advice, FTM, but I feel for you! I guess I just don't get the logic behind your friend suggesting an after baby shower when as a FTM you need everything and even just the bare essentials before the baby arrives.

Cherries2005

My in laws do their baby showers after we have baby, so I guess that's when I'll have mine, or so my sister in law has informed me. I wasn't expecting one, due to the fact that this is my second. But to them they see it as everyone gets to meet baby and get together. Which I'm totally fine with, since we don't want a lot of visitors after he's born.

We've already bought most of our necessities, like crib, car seat, stroller, and little nick-nacks. And when asked what to get for him, we just said toys, and clothes, maybe some bottles, or highchair for when he gets bigger.

emjeve

With my first, my friends threw me shower after DD was born. They did this for two reasons 1) my family lives out of state so that is where my big shower was before the baby was born, so none of my friends made the trip out for that shower (too expensive with travel and hotel etc...). 2) we were Team Green so the shower that my friends threw for me was all clothing! It was so nice to get a bunch of cute little girl outfits!

elledriver88

Thanks everyone, I did speak to a few people who had been complaining about the registry to explain why it was lacking and people seemed to understand. Hopefully everything works out, and now I know when my time comes to be the host, I won't be pushing mom to have an after baby shower.