You might be 9 months pregnant if... — The Bump
January 2016 Moms

You might be 9 months pregnant if...

* you accidentally bang your bump with the fridge door/car door/wall corners multiple times a day because it's bigger every day.

* every little tickle, cramp, or gas pain makes you stop what you're doing, grab your bump, and stare straight ahead with eyes as wide as dinner plates while your mind screams "THIS IS IT."

* every physical activity comes with its own unique and hilariously unattractive grunt or groan.

* you spend a ridiculous amount of time checking your tp for all the grossness that could mean labor is imminent.

Whatcha got, ladies?
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Re: You might be 9 months pregnant if...

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  • banders8 said:

    *You look like the Hunchback of Notre Dame when trying to do dishes.

    I have finally discovered that if I wear platforms while I do dishes its a zillion times easier because my bump doesn't run into the counter. Yeah it might get soaked instead but at least it's not as hard on my back.
  • *it is totally normal to have a conversation via text with your MIL and every female family member about your vagina, discharge, blood, etc *whenever you make a grunting noise or ooh and ahh about aches and pains your SO gets wide eyed *when you get excited at the fact that you only got up 3 times last night to pee *when every stranger you meet has the perfect advice for your pregnancy
    So much yes to this!!
  • *you take at least two walks a day and mutitask by doing acupressure points in hopes something will work to make labor start.
  • *When with a family of 10 males and several dogs and your gas is what's clearing everyone out of the room. :neutral:
    I decided years ago, during one of my other pregnancies, to embrace the gas and revel in the hilarity of watching grown men scatter while gagging and choking.  Much more fun that way! :)

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  • Ljohn43 said:

    Giving a urine sample at the ob has become an "interesting" experience ...

    Hahah it takes me longer and longer every week.
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