I am 13 weeks with my first . When is the best time to start planning ??? Considering risks of miscarriage. When should the place be booked? When should invites go out ? Who should be invited? ( should i invite people that i didnt have at our wedding ? ) ...any suggestions on places to register that arent expensive ??
Re: planning a baby shower ... questions.
It doesn't take long to throw a shower together, but if you have a specific place in mind, you should book it as soon as possible when the MTB is 6-7 months pregnant. Invites should go out 3-4 weeks in advance of the shower. You should invite people you and the baby's father are close to. I don't know what's around you, but Target, Babies R Us, and Amazon are good.
For real though, it's tacky as hell to plan your own shower, so just don't. Someone will probably offer to throw one for you.
How do people still not understand this??
7 different websites and every single one of them says the MTB should not host her own shower.
You have a problem with expecting someone to pay for everything for you? Then, why are you having a shower???
QFP before the inevitable DD.
thats a pretty hefty gift to get... so far ive paid for everything ... ive payed my way through college and our wedding and our house .. never once i expected anything from anyone. Im having a shower bacause i want to. If it bothers you so much then dont bother with me .
You don't have to get defensive OP, just because you got called out. @DrillSergeantCat gave really good advice and was giving it to you in a straightforward manner because the "rules" and etiquette behind a baby shower are pretty simple. That's all she was saying. Just take the advice and move on. And you throwing a shower isn't bothering anyone on TB, but I bet some of your guests will be side-eyeing the invite when it arrives.
Sure you can, but that's not what a baby shower is about. Just because you didn't know the actual definition and purpose of a baby shower, doesn't mean everyone else is an asshole because we do.
We aren't making shit up:
"In some countries, a baby shower is a way to celebrate the pending or recent birth of a child by presenting gifts to the mother at a party, whereas other cultures host a baby shower to celebrate the transformation of a woman into a mother".
Baby shower = wedding shower
Baby being born = wedding
Yes, people give gifts at a wedding but that is not the POINT of the wedding. The POINT of a shower (baby or wedding) is to "shower" the guest of honor with gifts. Hence, you don't throw your own. It's a gift to you. To throw your own is very specifically saying "buy me gifts". that is tacky.
Um ok then you should just buy all of your registry items yourself and not have a shower. Instead of a shower you could have a meet the baby party after the baby is born. Or if you really want a shower then have one and don't have a registry. Saying you want to pay for the shower but then accepting gifts from all of your guests doesn't make any sense.
You don't have to keep coming back and defending yourself. You know that right?
Parties before the baby is born celebrate the mom, parties after the baby is born celebrate the baby. It's not that hard of a concept.
But then again, after reading the posts, I am still trying to figure out why she "payed" her way through college, and it just doesn't make "sinse" to me. Just cannot wrap my head around it......
To answer your questions, my shower had two hostesses. Invites went out 3-4 weeks before the event, and the major planning/coordinating (food and games) happened about 1-2 weeks before. Only family and long-time family friends were invited.
Eta: the shower was at my house and took place when I was 33 weeks.
When should the place be booked? No idea since mine was at someone home.
When should invites go out ? 3-4 weeks before the event.
Who should be invited? ( should i invite people that i didnt have at our wedding ? ) ...any suggestions on places to register that arent expensive ?? Close friends and family. Whether or not they were invited to the wedding is irrelevant.
There's no rules to a baby shower you can plan it yourself if you would like. I did mine, I didn't pay for though my sister and mother had offered to. I'm a huge OCD, control freak and I preferred to plan it. I actually enjoyed planning it.
Again there's no rules you can do whatever you want.
This. Jesus people. That post is actually comical. The rules of etiquette surrounding baby showers are so incredibly simple. People have even given links and yet people still choose to ignore them and do what they want. Those folks are selfish.
Etiquette isn't law. BUT it is basic rules geared to make people cognizant of OTHER people and their comfort. the more that people say "rules don't matter/ etiquette doesn't matter" just shows how things are turning. And that turn ain't good. Again- it's a turn to being selfish and entiteld.
Yes, yes, yes!