Babies: 0 - 3 Months

Sex - or lack thereof

beanie1977beanie1977 member
edited December 2015 in Babies: 0 - 3 Months
Is anyone else still not feeling sexy or sexual? My LO is eight weeks. We had sex only once since I was cleared and I wasn't that into it. I'm not feeling sexual at all and never think about sex at all. My SO is feeling hurt and concerned that we won't be back to normal again.

I also bled for 6 full weeks quite heavy and the doctor put me on progesterone to regulate my cycle. I only stopped bleeding for a few days and now am once again bleeding two weeks into the medication so that could have something to do with it.

Anyone else have no sex drive? When does it come back?

Re: Sex - or lack thereof

  • I didn't give birth. I have less sex drive just from being TIRED. :) baby is 3 mos.
  • 8 weeks is so early. Relax. I think we only did it once at that point. I bled for 6 weeks and started progesterone and got a week off and had breakthrough bleeding at 7 weeks. Breastfeeding caused some dryness too. I would say by around 3 months we were back to normal. I needed to be less sleep deprived 1st
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  • Is anyone else still not feeling sexy or sexual? My LO is eight weeks. We had sex only once since I was cleared and I wasn't that into it. I'm not feeling sexual at all and never think about sex at all. My SO is feeling hurt and concerned that we won't be back to normal again. I also bled for 6 full weeks quite heavy and the doctor put me on progesterone to regulate my cycle. I only stopped bleeding for a few days and now am once again bleeding two weeks into the medication so that could have something to do with it. Anyone else have no sex drive? When does it come back?
    My sex drive is just now recovering after 2 years. For some BF kills sex drive. I usually just have to get warmed up pretty well and lubricate. Its hard to turn your brain off and just be in the moment. Meditation practice after the kids were asleep helped me with this process. The "mom brain" is real in that you are always thinking about that "next thing".

    "what if the baby wakes up?"
    "I need to drink more water"
    "omg the laundry"
    "what do we do about dinner tomorrow?"
    "did I forget a doctor appointment?"

    I had to really re-learn how to not feel scattered and out of the moment for a long time. I still struggle with it. Its hard to get into sex when you are overloaded or wound up tight. Ask your H to warm you up very well. Massage, foreplay and generous lubrication. Try some music that you love to give you something to mentally latch on to. I feel for you-- both times I struggled regaining the intense sexual interest (generally) that I had prior to having children.

    We are TTC now-- so I've been trying to do more for myself during the day to feel sexy. Sometimes just washing my face, doing my hair and putting a little war paint on helps. Other times my husband sends me sexy messages or gifs during the day. By the time bedtime rolls around I'm good to go and feel sexy.

    Also, does your husband help at all? I feel a LOT sexier when my husband does help with chores/child rearing. If its all left to me at the end of the night I am worn out and ready to sleep. The last thing I want is my husband pawing at me. So, you might mention that to your husband if that is an issue.


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  • A side effect of progesterone is decreased sex drive. Had that problem after my 2nd child. Your body should adjust or once your off the meds, should return to norm. Good luck!
  • I'm not on meds but my sex drive is pretty low...how can it be higher I'm tired all the damn time. And the list of things to do is constant. Im hoping in time things return to normal. 
  • katonikatoni member
    My baby is 3 months , I'm not  on meds but my sex drive is very low and last week we tried having sex it was really painful and I started bleeding but after sex the bleeding stopped  please help me how do I make it less painful and bleeding free.

  • My LO is 10 weeks and am EBF. My sex drive is high, but I'm too tired to do anything about it. We've had sex twice in the last two weeks and it didn't feel the same as before. It was slightly painful but more so just... Blah. It didn't feel good or bad or pleasurable, just blah. 
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