This is my first post. 2 weeks ago US confirmed no heartbeat at 10W.
I am a 1st grade teacher and the day I announced to my class I was expecting ( one student knew and made it public by asking innocently), I had my doctors appt and got the most heartbreaking news ever . You can only imagine the asking wave that followed.
I have felt in a roller coaster ... At first I was hurt, weak, disappointed, sad, and everything in between. Then I just wanted to focus on work when everyone suggested otherwise. Now, I feel pain.
My husband has an 8 yr old... I love both of them so much. But now I just feel so guilty that I need me time. I feel scared , this was my first baby and it became my Angel Baby... My what ifs are haunting me. What if I can't carry a baby full term? I'm saddened, scared, disappointed, and jealous ...
I see pregnant women and I don't feel comfortable around them... I hear about them and I pretend I care but I am jealous.
There is so much going on with emotions and I just can't find the words to express them... Not everyone understands and I despise when I hear "everything happens for a reason" ... I just can't understand that reason....I am deeply sorry for everyone's loss, I send love to all of you.