One & Done: Only child

Into: nice to meet you!

Well, hello! I am finally 100 percent at peace with my one and done decision. I had HG with my first and a scary delivery, and was happy with my decision to be "one and done". After 2 1/2 years though, my husband and I decided to "just see what happens" Well, what happened was an early miscarriage followed the very next month by a new pregnancy (shocked it happened so fast!) this pregnancy resulted in a blighted ovum (so scared to have the procedure this Friday!) and so we have made the choice that we are 100 percent committed to being one and done. I have been so I'll with both my 2nd and 3rd pregnancies, only to have them end. But, at the end of the day we are so happy to be the lucky parents of our sweet girl, and are relieved to make our final decision of one and done. Anyway, I am hoping to be an active member of this community, and maybe get some great ideas on how to handle the "when are you having another one/you should try again" comments.

Re: Into: nice to meet you!

  • @tink2727 That's a great place to be at peace with your decision. DH doesn't want to risk another since I was high risk during this pregnancy for a few reasons - being 40 I question realistically if it will happen for us again or not. I was told I'd need fertility treatment however we spontaneously got pregnant and feel so blessed with having a beautiful heathy girl. I would absolutely love another one but with LO being 8 weeks I can't imagine getting pregnant right away if it were to happen anyway. So I keep thinking about it and struggle with the thought that she may be an only child. Coming from being one of four is part of it. How do you come to piece with being one and done is my biggest inner question.
  • I am the oldest of 5 kids, and I totally get what you mean, I am so close to my siblings! - I never wanted a huge family (being the oldest was challenging!) but I always wanted two, I would have loved for my little one to have a sibling! I think, for me, I had a high risk pregnancy with my little one and now with being sick again/miscarriages, I realized that although it is unfortunate that she will not have siblings, I need to be the best mommy I can to her and risking my health/happiness is scary for me. I want to be here, present, and loving for the one sweet girl I am already so blessed to have. I personally seriously considered adoption, but my husband is not on board with that. Sorry this is long- but for me, I would rather be a happy, loving family of 3 than a scared/stressed family trying to grow, if that makes sense? You will make the best decision for you when the time is right- congratulations on your little one! 8 weeks is such a sweet time, enjoy those special newborn snuggles for me :) one thing I did with my sweet girl was acknowledge that she may be my one and only, even when she was tiny, and it helped me to enjoy her more, and I think it allowed me to process things more quickly when decision time came.
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