March 2016 Moms

Not finding out the gender.

My husband and I are a little at battle with wanting to find out the gender of the baby. I would love to find out and he wants it to be a big surprise. This is our first baby. So I want to know as soon as possible so I can really start on the shopping. But he makes a good point in being surprised. He wants to send my mom and sisters out to buy the first baby outfit for when the baby is born, which I think if so sweet. Have know clue how to solve this problem lol

Re: Not finding out the gender.

  • Have the tech write down and put it in an envelope. Your mom and sisters can know, while its still a surprise for you.

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  • This is exactly what i'm going through with DH. My A/S is seet fo hte 21st and if he's still gung-ho about not finding out, i'm having the tech put the info in an envelope because i have a feeling at like 30 weeks he will want to know and we can open the envelope together. I am a planner and have OCD to an extent, it will probably eat me alive not knowing and give me anxiety that "i'm no prepared"

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  • I highly recommend NOT finding out for at least one child. The at birth surprise is quite amazing. That being said I found out this time and like knowing. I didn't find out for my first two but my first was pretty cool not knowing. Pros and cons to both!
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  • I didn't find out for DD, and it was NOT by choice lol- she kept her legs crossed for every ultrasound we had!  I didn't find out until she was born, but I had that feeling all along that she was a girl. 

    So this time we are trying to find out again.  Hopefully this one isn't stubborn like his/her sister was! 

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  • We didn't find out for our first and it was awesome. We're finding out this time (my husband really wants another daughter and the anticipation is killing him) but I'm really not excited about the heaps of gender specific clothing we'll get as a result. Not knowing was a great motivator for people to avoid pink and blue.
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  • We were surprised with our daughter and it was really hard for me as I really really really wanted to know! In the end I'm so glad we didn't find out! It was so fun to be able to find out for myself when she was placed on my belly seconds after she was born! I told my husband that if we were to get pregnant again I would want to find out. Then I got pregnant and decided to be surprised again! I have NO desire to know ahead of time which is a good thing because I have access to the test results on my phone!!! As someone else said it's fun to make everyone else wait as well!
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  • oceanchildoceanchild member
    edited October 2015

    If your husband really wants to be surprised at birth, I'd wait. We mamas get to feel the first pokes, kicks, and the hiccups, get to carry those sweet babes for 9 months, and until the baby is born it can be hard for the dad to feel connected and involved. I think it is a priceless moment for a dad to get to be the first one to find out the sex of his child and announce it to you and the rest of the family. I get emotional just thinking about how precious those moments have been for us. It's completely magical in a way that a blue cake or a box of pink balloons will never be. :)

    I really think this is a great point as well! My husband also gets to be the baby-announcer, so it's such a great moment for *him* to get to tell me and anyone in the room (even the Doctor bc we don't let him find out either) instead of the U/S tech telling *us* <3

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    Brian's Whovian wife (5/'09) 
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    to Evan (7/'10), Clare (8/'11), Dean (3/'14), ^F(12/'15)^, Rose (3/'16)
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  • LilLump2LilLump2 member
    edited October 2015
    With my big kids, we found out every time. It was a great surprise for the tech to announce "it's a Boy/Girl!" And if you would have asked me a couple years ago, I would have told you that a surprise is a surprise no matter when you know.

    It's NOT.

    We planned to find out with DD2, but she was uncooperative every time. I was told girl one day, then boy later. So, Team Green- not by choice. It was kinda cool to not know, but boy did I want to know!

    When she was born, H was the one who told me through tears. I cried. I can't tell you how much more that moment means when you not only hear "It's a girl" but you have a baby you've desperately wanted for 9 months put in your arms. It's makes everything more intense and wonderful.

    Needless to say, we're team green. I'm sad March is so far away! I'm also a little tempted to call and find out the sec, since my doc knows. But this is my last chance at the party. No way will I spoil it. :)

    Eta: I bought the pink stroller I wanted, and left it in the box, just in case I had to return it. Everything else was gender neutral, and for clothes, we not bought the coming home outfit (1 girl, 1 boy) and a couple onesies/sleepers. My mom went nuts after we announced and bought SO MANY CLOTHES. I didn't expect that, but appreciated it. :)

    This time the stroller is black, so neutral. We're buying about 7 boy outfits. Then we'll with use them or return them. If it's a boy, then we'll take all my girl clothes to a consignment shop and sell them, and use the credit to buy more boy things.

    My only regret is I'm buying my diapers in advance, and I'm forcing myself to go easy on "girly" prints. :)
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  • that is me too, @LilLump2, last time at the party :D

    March 2016 siggy: babies - expectation vs reality

    Brian's Whovian wife (5/'09) 
    AP, BF, BW, CD, CLW, CS, ERF, Catholic mama 
    to Evan (7/'10), Clare (8/'11), Dean (3/'14), ^F(12/'15)^, Rose (3/'16)
    *no longer a Timelord ~ WibblyWobbly BabyWaby is here!*
    <3 but i still feel bigger on the inside <3
     Autism mama! 
  • Planning to find out the sex of our LO in 2 weeks (gender being much different). DH and I agreed long before getting pregnant that we would want to know. This kid is getting blue stuff no matter what, though. I'll tell everyone my favorite color is turquoise, but it's really any shade of blue. Male or female, this kid already has octopus print coveralls, teal onesies, a lime green creeper with a zebra, etc.
  • Our first was a surprise and it was hard waiting but SO worth it! Definitely something very special about getting the exhilaration of "it's a boy/girl!" in person at the end. For us we were getting all neutral gear anyway for future uses so that wasn't a huge concern. For outfits I had a handful of gender neutral onsies, etc. but the dress my mom brought to the hospital remains one of my favorite outfits DD has owned to date :-)
  • We have our anatomy scan in 2 weeks and I keep going back and forth about finding out. Our DS is 3 and we really aren't leaning towards a specific sex. After my last pregnancy ended in a still birth, we are just praying for a healthy baby. Regardless, we will not find out at the scan but wil have the tech write the sex down and put it in an envelope so if we do decide to open it, it will be a special moment between my DH and I.
    Both of my SILs are due in January. One is having a girl and the other a boy so we are thinking that is enough to hold my MIL over until we have our little one.
  • cnunes214cnunes214 member
    edited October 2015
    I find out next Wednesday, the 14th. I am so excited! I don't want the sonogram tech to tell me, but I want her to put the gender on the picture. I plan on taking the picture to a baker to make a little cake with the gender color inside. That night, when hubby comes home, we will cut the cake together to find out what he/she is! I thought it was a cute way to find out together! My mom wants us to be surprised, but I couldn't wait that long!!

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