Working Mom Vent!

jaxson41315

Hey Ladies! I just want to take a moment to vent ( I feel like no one else understands except you ladies)
I work the typical 9-5 and I feel like when I get home I just don't get enough time with my little guy! He goes to sleep around 9-10 PM. I feel so torn everyday! I know working is what is best for him but I also feel he should be with his mom more during the day. I hope to eventually get a part time job but right now financially that's not possible. I am a first time mom.. I feel like that may be why this is so hard for me. are there any moms out there who've done this before? And tell me it does get easier lol

Thanks for letting me vent!!

mlindon

I haven't gone back to work yet. LO is one month and I was thinking yesterday that I can't imagine going back after just six weeks. Our baby girl is still feeding every 2-3 hours and awake a good part of the night. I just don't see how it could be done. I'm planning on going back after 10 weeks.

jlkapp85

I feel the same. I love that he's getting into a longer sleeping routine, but that means only 4 hours with him now! I've made it a point to leave work right away without feeling guilty or without everything getting done. Then I work after he's asleep for a bit. The weekends are also that much more precious! I've been back at work a month now and it does feel easier/more routine.Also a FTM, so no real advice, just commiseration!

alvarez7285

I was working full time 9-5 6 days a week when I went back to work and my son was 3 months, I seriously couldn't handle it I was so sad everytime I left the house and would just be miserable at work missing him all day all my coworkers and customers could see it and pumping at work was getting exhausting too since little man is still waking up often at night to nurse I barely slept and worked all day and I also felt like I never got time with him but luckilily for me I had to go part time due to the fact that my husbands schedule has gotten busier with school but even then I hate leaving him. He would be with dad all day and do great but I feel like this young they need their mommy which made me feel even more guilty for being away so much. Towards the end of my full time work schedule it started to get easier tho we got into a rhythm but nothing is better than being home! I hope you can soon!

jaxson41315

Thanks ladies. It's def been an adjustment but hopefully will get easier with time. My husband works nights so he's with him till 2 then my mom watches him till 5. - just gotta keep in mind I'm working to make his life better

erikaluna01

It sounds like he's in great hands when you're not there. I have a 3 year old and 5 month old. What you are feeling when you leave your son is normal and yes, it does feel better over time. However, it will always be there at some level. My 3 year old just started preschool and I was a mess this week because she transitioned big time.

Good luck!

NicoleK9873

I'm glad you posted this. This is going to be my first baby & I cannot imagine how I am going to feel. I am too attached to my yorkies as is. Add a baby to the mix?! I manage a liquor store, so I will need all the advice I can get! I wish I could help you!

morninglory530

I'm a teacher and I had to go back to work (no choice!). A friend told me that I would miss my DS if I went to work and that I would miss working if I stayed home. So...you basically can't win in mommy guilt land. I do miss him, but I enjoy my job and I'm good at it, so it's nice most days.

aekuiper

I had to go back to work at 5 weeks, due to finances, and felt even worse about it with my SO calling me every 20-30 minutes telling me our daughter wouldn't stop crying and trying to nurse him (retrospectively, the thought is pretty entertaining). It does get easier with time, but the feeling never quite goes away unfortunately. Just cherish the moments you've got and do NOT feel bad about being the last one into the office and the first one to leave! I used to be the woman in the office 2 hours early and the one that stayed 2 hours late and my coworkers have mentioned it, but when I look them in the eye and say, "Im not sorry, I'm going home to my family and this can wait until tomorrow," they seem to get the idea to not bring it up again and respect my new family life.

vbonitto

I had to work with my first baby when he was 3-4 months old. It's very hard because you want to be with your baby. I had to leave him with a sitter all day long. You are doing what's best for your baby right now and a plus is that dad can be with the baby during the day and your mom for a few hours. No strangers are taking care of the baby. Also, young babies sleep a lot during the day so if you get 3-4 hours with him, that's a good amount of time plus all weekend. I know it's hard, though!

khozook

My DD was about 4 months when I went back to work, which was about a month ago.  That first day was so hard, no one saw me but after I dropped her off at her grandmother's house (our babysitter) I cried almost the whole way to work.  It gets hard at work when it's slow or when something frustrates you, I just think to myself "I am missing time with my  baby for this?"  Thankfully, grandma is tech savvy and sends updates and pictures throughout the day.  It is a double edge sword, because it makes me miss her more and be jealous of them for spending all day with her, but I remind myself that it's better than not having any pics/updates and I can see how happy she is at grandma's house.  You do get used to it, but it is so hard on those days when you get home and have so much to do with the 3-4 hours/day you have with them.  I agree that it does make your weekends much more precious.  I will admit though, now that she's starting to realize object permanence, I feel like she sees me leaving in the morning and doesn't like it, gets me every time.  I don't know if any of this helped, but it helped me vent a little too.  Thanks

JAP09-02

morninglory530 said:

I'm a teacher and I had to go back to work (no choice!). A friend told me that I would miss my DS if I went to work and that I would miss working if I stayed home. So...you basically can't win in mommy guilt land. I do miss him, but I enjoy my job and I'm good at it, so it's nice most days.

Yes, this is true! This is my third child but first I haven't worked. I do miss getting out of the house.

2ndtimearound25

This is my second child n i went back to work when she was 3 months n it was very hard. My first i didn't go back for a whole year just had a few classes. I stop breastfeeding as soon as i went back n i felt like she was losing that bond with me but eventually it gets easier as she got a little older she would smile n get really happy as soon as she seen my face n that really made my day. It's still hard sometimes especially when working 10 hour shifts. But i know I'm doing it for both kids n it gets easier day by day.

borgie05

I feel your pain! I've been back at work just over 2 months now and it's not getting any easier for me. I beg my husband just about every day to let me just quit my job so I can be home. Unfortunately it's not in the cards for me to stay home just yet, but we are working towards it. Just have a few things to pay off first, which is easier said than done since car issues and just everything else expensive keeps popping up! Eventually though we'll get there!