Today my angel would of turned 1.
I lost my little angel at 7 weeks on a cruise ship. I did not know I was pregnant until I lost her. The doctors told her she died due to my medication I was taking. I live with this guilt everyday of my life that I killed my girl.
All my friends babies are turning one this year and they are throwing the most beautiful birthday party's and I don't get to plan one for my girl. The most I can do is have a cake with my husband to celebrate her.
And I hate this I hate it so much!!! I want everyone to celebrate her like how my friends are celebrating their child. But no one seems to understand I have a girl in heaven turning one that I love. No one gets the fact I want to talk about her and get gifts for her.
And I hate the fact I want to do this. Why do I want to do this. I feel like I'm defective or something. I just want today to go by fast but I hate the fact I want the day to go fast.
I just really want my baby