Pregnant after a Loss


In April I found out at my 12 week scan that I'd had a missed miscarriage. We were devastated, it was our first child. I have been feeling a bit funny over the past day or so, so yesterday I decided to take a pregnancy test and there was a very feint line. I've taken 4 more since and all the same. But very feint. I'm so scared that it's going to happen again. Do any of you have any coping techniques?

Re: Worried

  • I am so sorry for your loss. Congratulations on your rainbow baby! I also had a mmc discovered at 13 weeks after a healthy 9 week ultrasound. So, when people say after you see a heartbeat, your chances of mc drop dramatically, that doesn't comfort me, because it happened to me. I am 9w1d, our angel baby stopped growing at 9w6d. So, I am very anxious for my next appointment as i have been for every appointment. Will your doctor see you earlier now since you have had a mc? My doctor started seeing me at 6 weeks and I go every 2 weeks until I am out of the first trimester to ease my mind. It definitely helps with the anxiety not having such long gaps between appointments, but when I see that ultrasound machine, I get anxious. I have just been trying to take it easy and not feel lazy for doing so, I am like a crazy mama bear this time. Nit that I wasn't before, but I am much more insistent on taking it easy this time (especially at work, I work12 hr days on my feet) . I hope everything is uncomplicated for you this pregnancy!
  • I too have been seeking ways to cope because letting this all consuming anxiety into my life is pretty much insanity.

    I was reading some mantras the other day and one stuck with me - "it's ok to love this baby". Loving this LO won't change the love I have for my two angels and if this one is not meant to be that won't make me love it any less. That brought me some peace and comfort.

    Good luck with everything.
    Married 7/20/13
    #1 MC August 2014 @ 5 Weeks
    #2 MC November 2014 @ 5 Weeks
    #3 EDD 2.17.16

    BabyFruit Ticker
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  • I had a missed miscarriage, too and was a nervous wreck up until very recently. Honestly, when I was at my worst I called my doctor. I told the nurse exactly how I felt, even cried on the phone, she brought me in that afternoon for a quick ultrasound (I didn't see the doctor) to check on the baby. What you went through was traumatic and the way you feel is perfectly normal. Having someone to talk to helped me so you're welcome to reach out any time:

    I'm on couch potato rest, so I've got nothing but time on my hands! I would call your doctor if you're really worried, though. How often do you get to go right now? It was hard for me to make It through a more than a week early on, so I know how you feel. I never retested for reassurance, but if you're not bleeding then that's a good sign! I know it's scary, though and I'm so sorry that happened to you the first time. Did they give you an explanation for your first loss? Thinking of you!
  • Thanks all, I've booked an appointment with the Dr for Monday. I'm not sure they will give an early scan as in the UK they don't often do it if you're worried. So the first time I will see anything will be around 12 weeks I think.

    there was no explanation for the last time - which I think is what is worrying me.

    Thanks so much PlainJane8350.
  • PlainJane8350PlainJane8350 member
    edited July 2015
    Of course! They usually assume it was a genetic abnormality with the pregnancy your first time, but you can always get your blood tested and even test the "products of conception" if you had a D&C if you really want answers. I tested instead of waiting because I was 34 when I had my missed miscarriage.
  • What helped me during my rainbow pg was to have mantras that I repeated over and over when I was feeling anxiety rise. One was 'I want my baby to have a relaxed, calm, peaceful mama, not a stressed, anxiety-ridden, frantic mama'.

    This time I prayed a lot and would lift upy fears and worries in prayer and remind myself that I don't have control over the outcome either way. It's out of my hands.

    DD1 born 5/24/10.

    Missed M/C at 14 wks Feb 2012.

    DD2 born 5/14/13.

    Missed M/C at 9 wks July 2015.

    Expecting someone new 4/17/17.
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