I am LIVID at my boss ...this is a long one — The Bump
February 2016 Moms

I am LIVID at my boss ...this is a long one

So I'm 8 weeks pregnant today, but last Thursday at my appointment I mentioned to my doctor that I had some spotting that just started. Knowing my history (MC in feb) she examined me and said I should go on bed rest until I didn't bleed for 2 days. Instantly I was upset, thinking the worst and also thinking oh great I'm going to have to tell my boss. I was hoping to wait til at least 12 weeks.

Given how upset I was I couldn't call him so I sent him an email explaining my situation and how this isn't my first pregnancy so I'm taking all the steps to prevent it from happening again. He responded and it was very heartfelt and I thought, wow that's a great response. So I thought all was good with that. Worked from home on Friday with no problem.

Weekend went by and my spotting stopped so I am back to work and hopeful everything is fine (will know at US and appt on Thursday).

Come to find out today that my boss, the owner of the company I work for, announced my situation, including that I had a previous miscarriage to the leadership team in a meeting on Friday morning to let them know that we may have limited capacity with marketing activities for awhile if I need more time off. Meanwhile I told him in my email that I would WFH and was hopeful I could return to the office on Monday.

WTF!!! That is personal medical information about an employee. I was so mad, crying and shaking for an hour. I feel so disrespected and I can't believe he would do that. It's one thing to say that I'm dealing with personal issues but another to go into detail and say I'm pregnant, and had a miscarriage before. I'm so so mad at this point all I want to do is walk out. My family doesn't even know and for him to tell other people without my permission is morally wrong.

Please tell me I'm right on this one!!

Re: I am LIVID at my boss ...this is a long one

  • kandb521 said:
    So I'm 8 weeks pregnant today, but last Thursday at my appointment I mentioned to my doctor that I had some spotting that just started. Knowing my history (MC in feb) she examined me and said I should go on bed rest until I didn't bleed for 2 days. Instantly I was upset, thinking the worst and also thinking oh great I'm going to have to tell my boss. I was hoping to wait til at least 12 weeks. Given how upset I was I couldn't call him so I sent him an email explaining my situation and how this isn't my first pregnancy so I'm taking all the steps to prevent it from happening again. He responded and it was very heartfelt and I thought, wow that's a great response. So I thought all was good with that. Worked from home on Friday with no problem. Weekend went by and my spotting stopped so I am back to work and hopeful everything is fine (will know at US and appt on Thursday). Come to find out today that my boss, the owner of the company I work for, announced my situation, including that I had a previous miscarriage to the leadership team in a meeting on Friday morning to let them know that we may have limited capacity with marketing activities for awhile if I need more time off. Meanwhile I told him in my email that I would WFH and was hopeful I could return to the office on Monday. WTF!!! That is personal medical information about an employee. I was so mad, crying and shaking for an hour. I feel so disrespected and I can't believe he would do that. It's one thing to say that I'm dealing with personal issues but another to go into detail and say I'm pregnant, and had a miscarriage before. I'm so so mad at this point all I want to do is walk out. My family doesn't even know and for him to tell other people without my permission is morally wrong. Please tell me I'm right on this one!!
    Go to HR. They are not allowed to divulge this kind of information by law.

    KBJ-SEJ married 8.18.2012
    BMJ born 5.27.2014
    MMC 7.2.2015 @ 5w5d
    SMEJ born 6.5.2016
    BFP 6.8.2018 EDD 02.18.2019


    AmadorRoseRRC216JordynLeighx3jshuck09
  • I went to HR but not sure much will be done except to tell him he can't do that and shouldn't in the future. It's a small company and he's the owner so I don't see this going anywhere. I've lost all respect for him.
  • kayjay44kayjay44
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    member
    edited June 2015
    kandb521 said:
    I went to HR but not sure much will be done except to tell him he can't do that and shouldn't in the future. It's a small company and he's the owner so I don't see this going anywhere. I've lost all respect for him.
    Then honestly, go to the state agency (Ours is the Department of Labor and Industries) and report it. It is not legal to disclose medical information that isn't pertinent to your job without your consent. And start looking for a new job. It doesn't sound like you'll qualify for FMLA anyway.

    KBJ-SEJ married 8.18.2012
    BMJ born 5.27.2014
    MMC 7.2.2015 @ 5w5d
    SMEJ born 6.5.2016
    BFP 6.8.2018 EDD 02.18.2019


    lauren0571AmadorRose
  • lauren0571lauren0571
    Fourth Anniversary 100 Love Its 100 Comments Name Dropper
    member
    edited June 2015
    100% right. What he did was very disrespectful and I am not sure if it was ethical.
    I am so sorry to hear that you are going through this. Hang in there.

    Edited to add: I'm not sure if you'd feel comfortable but this might be something for HR.
     BabyFruit Ticker

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • If he is the owner then the only thing to do is contact someone outside the company if you really wanted to push the issue, otherwise as far as inside the company he can do as he pleases unfortunately. Where I work is family owned and they let an expectant mother go and offered to pay through her maternity leave, she didn't pursue any legal action and everyone went on there way with her drawing full pay until 8 weeks post postpartum. What he did isn't right at all it's just up to you how much you value your job, I'm sorry!
  • je5sc0je5sc0
    500 Love Its 500 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    member
    Ick! So sorry! Don't have any useful advice other than what PP have said. Good luck!
  • RRC216RRC216
    500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 500 Comments First Answer
    member
    reading your post I blurted out OH SHIT! Ok this is NOT ok! I personally would have a talk with him. Contacting someone outside the company may be more difficult and cause you more stress. Do what you are comfortable with! I am so sorry he did this to you! It is extremely unfair! HUGS!

    image

    Mommy to my Angel baby Domenico Anjelo M/C 11 weeks 12/20/2014
    C/P 4/15/2015 5 weeks
    BFP 6/15 /15 Due: 2/25/16

  • Maybe it was just an honest mistake? I know it's no excuse for his oversharing, but in his mind he may have thought he was just sharing the facts with the team so everyone could be supportive. If you love your job, I'd probably just explain to him how it made you feel and try to move on.
  • Just FYI, your employer is not bound by HIPAA. Looking at it from a business standpoint, he's just trying to ensure that things go smoothly if you need to be out. I'm sure he didn't intend to upset you.
  • Just FYI, your employer is not bound by HIPAA. Looking at it from a business standpoint, he's just trying to ensure that things go smoothly if you need to be out. I'm sure he didn't intend to upset you.
    Employers are typically only bound by HIPPA as it relates to an employer sponsored heath plan, but it's protected information under the ADA, FMLA, and many state laws.

    KBJ-SEJ married 8.18.2012
    BMJ born 5.27.2014
    MMC 7.2.2015 @ 5w5d
    SMEJ born 6.5.2016
    BFP 6.8.2018 EDD 02.18.2019


Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards